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  4. That figures....

That figures....

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  • K Keith Barrow

    Given that the new curriculum is being foisted on them by a bunch of people who have no clue and sticking to old-fashioned, often dogmatic, approaches about what they should be doing, I'd say all this over-prepares them for a life in modern Britain. I would say a working life, but I guess that opportunity will be denied to a lot of them. As for Shakespeare, my experience is the schools (as the knife addled rape shed I went to did) will take the easiest options, namely the "comedies". Comedy- perhaps, funny - nope. Two years studying A Midsummer's Night's Dream and Twelfth night, and the funniest thing was the name "Titania". Seeing one of the "proper" plays - "King Lear" later in life was a revelation though. Sill, I guess 16th/17th century plays set in some kingly palace or other will all be immediately relevant to a child born in Felling 400+ years later.

    Alberto Brandolini:

    The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.

    W Offline
    W Offline
    WiganLatics
    wrote on last edited by
    #5

    Quote:

    I would say a working life, but I guess that opportunity will be denied to a lot of them

    Haven't you heard? We have a shortage of Shakespearean actors... :~

    Quote:

    as the knife addled rape shed I went to did

    Have you ever considered a job in PR? ;P Yup, my knife-addled rape shed just taught those 'comedies' too. Still waiting to get my own kingly palace! Hopefully it will all become relevant one day!

    K 1 Reply Last reply
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    • W WiganLatics

      Yeah, that's an important one, I definitely use that all the time, makes the code reviews interesting ;)

      P Offline
      P Offline
      Pete OHanlon
      wrote on last edited by
      #6

      Certainly makes the comments flow, and method names have a real pizzazz to them.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • P Pete OHanlon

        "A spokesman said the government wanted "all children to learn the core knowledge in key subjects - the ones universities and employers value the most"." Exactly. The thing I value most about my employees is their Iambic Pentameter.

        R Offline
        R Offline
        Rage
        wrote on last edited by
        #7

        Pete O'Hanlon wrote:

        Iambic Pentameter

        I had to look that up[^]. This article is very funny : it introduces Iambi...thing as a metric line, and then shows that you can pretty much swap syllables, add syllables, break the rule as you like. ;) A rule with moving limits: maybe the definition of poetry. :doh:

        ~RaGE();

        I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Entropy isn't what it used to.

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        • P Pete OHanlon

          "A spokesman said the government wanted "all children to learn the core knowledge in key subjects - the ones universities and employers value the most"." Exactly. The thing I value most about my employees is their Iambic Pentameter.

          L Offline
          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #8

          Romeo, a young man with a remarkable patience.
          Juliet, a likewise young woman of remarkable grace.
          Ophelia, a remarkable woman much in dispute with Hamlet.
          Hamlet, the flatterer of Andersen Insulting A/S.

                          Act I: Hamlet's insults and flattery.
          
                          Scene I: The insulting of Romeo.
          

          [Enter Hamlet and Romeo]

          Hamlet:
          You lying stupid fatherless big smelly half-witted coward!
          You are as stupid as the difference between a handsome rich brave
          hero and thyself! Speak your mind!

          You are as brave as the sum of your fat little stuffed misused dusty
          old rotten codpiece and a beautiful fair warm peaceful sunny summer's
          day. You are as healthy as the difference between the sum of the
          sweetest reddest rose and my father and yourself! Speak your mind!

          You are as cowardly as the sum of yourself and the difference
          between a big mighty proud kingdom and a horse. Speak your mind.

          Speak your mind!

          [Exit Romeo]

                          Scene II: The praising of Juliet.
          

          [Enter Juliet]

          Hamlet:
          Thou art as sweet as the sum of the sum of Romeo and his horse and his
          black cat! Speak thy mind!

          [Exit Juliet]

                          Scene III: The praising of Ophelia.
          

          [Enter Ophelia]

          Hamlet:
          Thou art as lovely as the product of a large rural town and my amazing
          bottomless embroidered purse. Speak thy mind!

          Thou art as loving as the product of the bluest clearest sweetest sky
          and the sum of a squirrel and a white horse. Thou art as beautiful as
          the difference between Juliet and thyself. Speak thy mind!

          [Exeunt Ophelia and Hamlet]

                          Act II: Behind Hamlet's back.
          
                          Scene I: Romeo and Juliet's conversation.
          

          [Enter Romeo and Juliet]

          Romeo:
          Speak your mind. You are as worried as the sum of yourself and the
          difference between my small smooth hamster and my nose. Speak your
          mind!

          Juliet:
          Speak YOUR mind! You are as bad as Hamlet! You are as small as the
          difference between the square of the difference between my little pony
          and your big hairy hound and the cube of your sorry little
          codpiece. Speak your mind!

          [Exit Romeo]

                          Scene II: Juliet and Ophelia's conversation.
          

          [Enter Ophelia]

          Juliet:
          Thou art as good as the quotient between Romeo and the sum of a small
          furry animal and a leech. Speak your mind!

          Ophelia:
          Thou art as disgusting as the quotient between Romeo and twice the
          difference between a mistletoe and an oozing infected blis

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          • W WiganLatics

            http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-28987787[^] The Department for Education said its aim was to prepare children for "life in modern Britain" ... by studying at least two Shakespeare plays. :wtf:

            Mike HankeyM Offline
            Mike HankeyM Offline
            Mike Hankey
            wrote on last edited by
            #9

            What they need to be teaching them is how to deal with real life; how to spend you unemployed time to pursue your dreams, how to trade food stamps for drugs, the does and don't of selling meth, Walmart shopping fashion. Just the basics you know.

            New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead? Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9. I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!

            W L 2 Replies Last reply
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            • W WiganLatics

              http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-28987787[^] The Department for Education said its aim was to prepare children for "life in modern Britain" ... by studying at least two Shakespeare plays. :wtf:

              P Offline
              P Offline
              Pablo Aliskevicius
              wrote on last edited by
              #10

              Instead of Latin? In another continent, and another millenium, one of our high school teachers taught us the offside rule. One of us actually used that one at work: he played football (the one with the round ball) professionally.

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              • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                What they need to be teaching them is how to deal with real life; how to spend you unemployed time to pursue your dreams, how to trade food stamps for drugs, the does and don't of selling meth, Walmart shopping fashion. Just the basics you know.

                New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead? Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9. I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!

                W Offline
                W Offline
                WiganLatics
                wrote on last edited by
                #11

                You should suggest that: https://www.education.gov.uk/help/contactus[^] ;P

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                • P Pablo Aliskevicius

                  Instead of Latin? In another continent, and another millenium, one of our high school teachers taught us the offside rule. One of us actually used that one at work: he played football (the one with the round ball) professionally.

                  W Offline
                  W Offline
                  WiganLatics
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #12

                  I'm assuming they'll be treating Latin as one of the compulsory 'Modern Foreign Languages' ;P Glad someone got to use that one. They get upset when I kick a ball around the office!

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                  • W WiganLatics

                    Quote:

                    I would say a working life, but I guess that opportunity will be denied to a lot of them

                    Haven't you heard? We have a shortage of Shakespearean actors... :~

                    Quote:

                    as the knife addled rape shed I went to did

                    Have you ever considered a job in PR? ;P Yup, my knife-addled rape shed just taught those 'comedies' too. Still waiting to get my own kingly palace! Hopefully it will all become relevant one day!

                    K Offline
                    K Offline
                    Keith Barrow
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #13

                    WiganLatics wrote:

                    Still waiting to get my own kingly palace!

                    It'll be by the church. Most. Laboured. Joke. Ever.

                    Alberto Brandolini:

                    The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.

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                    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                      What they need to be teaching them is how to deal with real life; how to spend you unemployed time to pursue your dreams, how to trade food stamps for drugs, the does and don't of selling meth, Walmart shopping fashion. Just the basics you know.

                      New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead? Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9. I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!

                      L Offline
                      L Offline
                      loctrice
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #14

                      Another key skill seems to be how to avoid paying rent. You have to have the skillset to freeload on people, and get in and out of apartments/houses without actually paying any bills. I think there are subtle skills involved in that. Like having kids so you can put bills in their names, and changing numbers in your social security number. You got to talk people into letting you stay for a couple of weeks, and then be able to be subtle about turning that into months. Possibly, if you've taken enough of these courses, get the person you're staying with to help pay deposit and first rent at your new place.

                      Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine

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                      • P Pete OHanlon

                        "A spokesman said the government wanted "all children to learn the core knowledge in key subjects - the ones universities and employers value the most"." Exactly. The thing I value most about my employees is their Iambic Pentameter.

                        P Offline
                        P Offline
                        PhilLenoir
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #15

                        That's what she said

                        Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.

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                        • W WiganLatics

                          Yeah, that's an important one, I definitely use that all the time, makes the code reviews interesting ;)

                          P Offline
                          P Offline
                          PhilLenoir
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #16

                          Comments must be written in Iambic Pentameter and variable names must rhyme. I'm adding that to my coding standards now!

                          Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.

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                          0
                          • W WiganLatics

                            http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-28987787[^] The Department for Education said its aim was to prepare children for "life in modern Britain" ... by studying at least two Shakespeare plays. :wtf:

                            B Offline
                            B Offline
                            Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #17

                            don't worry it is only until Labour gets in then it will be replaced by 2 TOWIE episodes

                            You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

                            W 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • B Bergholt Stuttley Johnson

                              don't worry it is only until Labour gets in then it will be replaced by 2 TOWIE episodes

                              You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

                              W Offline
                              W Offline
                              WiganLatics
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #18

                              Ha well I suppose TOWIE is contemporary show. Maybe it has some relevance ... :~ I would hope that they temper it with this though: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4r_a5adehs[^]

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                              • K Keith Barrow

                                Given that the new curriculum is being foisted on them by a bunch of people who have no clue and sticking to old-fashioned, often dogmatic, approaches about what they should be doing, I'd say all this over-prepares them for a life in modern Britain. I would say a working life, but I guess that opportunity will be denied to a lot of them. As for Shakespeare, my experience is the schools (as the knife addled rape shed I went to did) will take the easiest options, namely the "comedies". Comedy- perhaps, funny - nope. Two years studying A Midsummer's Night's Dream and Twelfth night, and the funniest thing was the name "Titania". Seeing one of the "proper" plays - "King Lear" later in life was a revelation though. Sill, I guess 16th/17th century plays set in some kingly palace or other will all be immediately relevant to a child born in Felling 400+ years later.

                                Alberto Brandolini:

                                The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.

                                OriginalGriffO Offline
                                OriginalGriffO Offline
                                OriginalGriff
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #19

                                Keith Barrow wrote:

                                funniest thing was the name "Titania"

                                And Bottom. Don't forget Bottom.

                                You looking for sympathy? You'll find it in the dictionary, between sympathomimetic and sympatric (Page 1788, if it helps)

                                "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                                "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                                K 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                  Keith Barrow wrote:

                                  funniest thing was the name "Titania"

                                  And Bottom. Don't forget Bottom.

                                  You looking for sympathy? You'll find it in the dictionary, between sympathomimetic and sympatric (Page 1788, if it helps)

                                  K Offline
                                  K Offline
                                  Keith Barrow
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #20

                                  Heheheheh.

                                  Alberto Brandolini:

                                  The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • W WiganLatics

                                    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-28987787[^] The Department for Education said its aim was to prepare children for "life in modern Britain" ... by studying at least two Shakespeare plays. :wtf:

                                    G Offline
                                    G Offline
                                    GuyThiebaut
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #21

                                    I am probably a bit of an outlier on this - I think this is a brilliant idea. I studied the Scottish play when I was fourteen and read and saw other plays, written by the Bard, in my early twenties. I do have something of a bias as I was a voracious reader of English literature in my twenties and encourage everyone to explore the treasure trove that is our great literary tradition in the UK(I don't include Dan Brown...).

                                    “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”

                                    ― Christopher Hitchens

                                    W C 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • G GuyThiebaut

                                      I am probably a bit of an outlier on this - I think this is a brilliant idea. I studied the Scottish play when I was fourteen and read and saw other plays, written by the Bard, in my early twenties. I do have something of a bias as I was a voracious reader of English literature in my twenties and encourage everyone to explore the treasure trove that is our great literary tradition in the UK(I don't include Dan Brown...).

                                      “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”

                                      ― Christopher Hitchens

                                      W Offline
                                      W Offline
                                      WiganLatics
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #22

                                      I'm being facetious really, I don't have a problem with learning about Shakespeare. It's just that they are harping on about 'modern Britain' at the same time. ;) Although ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NM-Y1ch4b5c[^]

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • G GuyThiebaut

                                        I am probably a bit of an outlier on this - I think this is a brilliant idea. I studied the Scottish play when I was fourteen and read and saw other plays, written by the Bard, in my early twenties. I do have something of a bias as I was a voracious reader of English literature in my twenties and encourage everyone to explore the treasure trove that is our great literary tradition in the UK(I don't include Dan Brown...).

                                        “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”

                                        ― Christopher Hitchens

                                        C Offline
                                        C Offline
                                        chriselst
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #23

                                        My father was often beaten as a child at school, once for stating that in his view Shakespeare was "a tit-brained quill pusher". I preferred reading Tom Sharpe when I got to school, although the English teacher thought that inappropriate.

                                        Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • W WiganLatics

                                          I'm assuming they'll be treating Latin as one of the compulsory 'Modern Foreign Languages' ;P Glad someone got to use that one. They get upset when I kick a ball around the office!

                                          G Offline
                                          G Offline
                                          GuyThiebaut
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #24

                                          Being able to swear in Latin comes in handy at times...

                                          “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”

                                          ― Christopher Hitchens

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