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A quick puzzle for you

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
sysadmindata-structureshelp
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  • C Offline
    C Offline
    chriselst
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    We have a system that takes messages from a JMS queue, and then processes them on the back end of a Unix server. Recently it has started taking some (a very small number of the total) messages, but not processing them. No errors, no logging, some messages merely disappear. We've checked everything from our side, it is undoubtedly taking the messages from the queue, but somehow those messages are lost at some point. So we've asked the vendor to investigate. They refuse to do so without a screenshot of the problem occuring. I've just replied letting them know I'll rustle up a screenshot of something not happening in a process on the backend of a server for them. Just as soon as I've finished bottling unicorn farts. Six and a half days to go.

    Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

    D OriginalGriffO T 3 Replies Last reply
    0
    • C chriselst

      We have a system that takes messages from a JMS queue, and then processes them on the back end of a Unix server. Recently it has started taking some (a very small number of the total) messages, but not processing them. No errors, no logging, some messages merely disappear. We've checked everything from our side, it is undoubtedly taking the messages from the queue, but somehow those messages are lost at some point. So we've asked the vendor to investigate. They refuse to do so without a screenshot of the problem occuring. I've just replied letting them know I'll rustle up a screenshot of something not happening in a process on the backend of a server for them. Just as soon as I've finished bottling unicorn farts. Six and a half days to go.

      Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

      D Offline
      D Offline
      dan sh
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      73

      "You'd have to be a floating database guru clad in a white toga and ghandi level of sereneness to fix this goddamn clusterfuck.", BruceN[^]

      N 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • C chriselst

        We have a system that takes messages from a JMS queue, and then processes them on the back end of a Unix server. Recently it has started taking some (a very small number of the total) messages, but not processing them. No errors, no logging, some messages merely disappear. We've checked everything from our side, it is undoubtedly taking the messages from the queue, but somehow those messages are lost at some point. So we've asked the vendor to investigate. They refuse to do so without a screenshot of the problem occuring. I've just replied letting them know I'll rustle up a screenshot of something not happening in a process on the backend of a server for them. Just as soon as I've finished bottling unicorn farts. Six and a half days to go.

        Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

        OriginalGriffO Offline
        OriginalGriffO Offline
        OriginalGriff
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Send 'em a screenshot of a blank screen? :laugh:

        Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...

        "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
        "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • D dan sh

          73

          "You'd have to be a floating database guru clad in a white toga and ghandi level of sereneness to fix this goddamn clusterfuck.", BruceN[^]

          N Offline
          N Offline
          Nelek
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Wrong... it is 42

          M.D.V. ;) If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about? Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.

          D 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • C chriselst

            We have a system that takes messages from a JMS queue, and then processes them on the back end of a Unix server. Recently it has started taking some (a very small number of the total) messages, but not processing them. No errors, no logging, some messages merely disappear. We've checked everything from our side, it is undoubtedly taking the messages from the queue, but somehow those messages are lost at some point. So we've asked the vendor to investigate. They refuse to do so without a screenshot of the problem occuring. I've just replied letting them know I'll rustle up a screenshot of something not happening in a process on the backend of a server for them. Just as soon as I've finished bottling unicorn farts. Six and a half days to go.

            Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

            T Offline
            T Offline
            Tim Carmichael
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            A number of years back, I was working on a system that automatically created and approved invoices upon receipt of materials. The auditor asked to see screen shots of the process: invoice being entered, invoice being created, invoice being approved. I reiterated: it is an automated process - it all happens as part of the invoice creation. I might as well have talked to a rock...

            D M 2 Replies Last reply
            0
            • N Nelek

              Wrong... it is 42

              M.D.V. ;) If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about? Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.

              D Offline
              D Offline
              dan sh
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Not anymore. 73 is a better number. If you don't trust me, ask Sheldon[^].

              "You'd have to be a floating database guru clad in a white toga and ghandi level of sereneness to fix this goddamn clusterfuck.", BruceN[^]

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • T Tim Carmichael

                A number of years back, I was working on a system that automatically created and approved invoices upon receipt of materials. The auditor asked to see screen shots of the process: invoice being entered, invoice being created, invoice being approved. I reiterated: it is an automated process - it all happens as part of the invoice creation. I might as well have talked to a rock...

                D Offline
                D Offline
                Dan Neely
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Take a screenshot of the service manager showing that Automated Invoice Processing Service is running. Ctrl-C Ctrl-V Ctrl-C Ctrl-V

                Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason? Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful? --Zachris Topelius Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies. -- Sarah Hoyt

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • T Tim Carmichael

                  A number of years back, I was working on a system that automatically created and approved invoices upon receipt of materials. The auditor asked to see screen shots of the process: invoice being entered, invoice being created, invoice being approved. I reiterated: it is an automated process - it all happens as part of the invoice creation. I might as well have talked to a rock...

                  M Offline
                  M Offline
                  Mycroft Holmes
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  I once got a silly request from a PM, as though that never happens, when I explained there was absolutely no value in creating the feature his response was that it was an audit requirement, checkmate, just build the bloody thing.

                  Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

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