Showers: Men Vs. Women (Joke)
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How To Shower Like A Woman... * Take off clothing and place it in sectional laundry hamper according to lights and darks. * Walk to bathroom wearing long bathrobe. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. * Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat. * Get in shower. Look for face-cloth, arm-cloth, leg-cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. * Wash you hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. * Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. * Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on for 15 minutes. * Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red and raw. * Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash. * Rinse conditioner off of hair (this takes at least 15 minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off). * Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead. * Scream loudly when your boyfriend/husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure. * Turn off shower. * Squeegee off all wet surfaces inn the shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. * Get out of the shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African Country. * Wrap hair in super-absorbent second towel. * Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit. Attack with nails/tweezers if found. * Return to bedroom wearing bathrobe and towel on head. * If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and then rush to the bedroom to spend an hour-and-a-half getting dressed. How To Shower Like A Man... * Take off clothes while sitting in the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. * Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your girlfriend/wife along the way, flash her making the ''woo, woo'' sound. * Get in shower. Don't bother looking for a washcloth. You don't use one. * Wash your face. * Wash your armpits. * Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower. * Wash your privates and surronding area. * Wash your ass, leaving hair on the soap bar. * Shampoo your hair. Do not use conditioner. * Make a shampoo Mohawk. * Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror. * Pee (in the shower). * Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor bacause you left t
Rohit Sinha wrote: * Get in shower. Don't bother looking for a washcloth. You don't use one. Exactly. What's the point with a washcloth when you've got palms? Everytime I visit the US, I end up with this extra extremely small towel. I find it kind of insulting.. :P :-D Rohit Sinha wrote: * Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Leave shower curtain open and wet mat on the floor. Of course you have to flex a couple of times. You need to inspect the result of the weight lifting! And I always leave the shower curtain open too. Heck, I will go back in the shower again later so take another shower. Why do all the extra work? -- Berlin rules.
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Rohit Sinha wrote: * Get in shower. Don't bother looking for a washcloth. You don't use one. Exactly. What's the point with a washcloth when you've got palms? Everytime I visit the US, I end up with this extra extremely small towel. I find it kind of insulting.. :P :-D Rohit Sinha wrote: * Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Leave shower curtain open and wet mat on the floor. Of course you have to flex a couple of times. You need to inspect the result of the weight lifting! And I always leave the shower curtain open too. Heck, I will go back in the shower again later so take another shower. Why do all the extra work? -- Berlin rules.
Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Why do all the extra work? Exactly. This is why I skip showering too, sometimes. After all, I'll get dirty later anyway, and will have to shower again. So why do the same thing twice? :rolleyes: Kidding. :-D
Regards,Rohit Sinha
Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.
- Mother Teresa -
Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Why do all the extra work? Exactly. This is why I skip showering too, sometimes. After all, I'll get dirty later anyway, and will have to shower again. So why do the same thing twice? :rolleyes: Kidding. :-D
Regards,Rohit Sinha
Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.
- Mother TeresaIt seems you and I need this t-shirt: http://www.pricepoint.com/product2006.html[^] :-D -- Berlin rules.
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It seems you and I need this t-shirt: http://www.pricepoint.com/product2006.html[^] :-D -- Berlin rules.
:cool:
Regards,Rohit Sinha
Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.
- Mother Teresa -
It seems you and I need this t-shirt: http://www.pricepoint.com/product2006.html[^] :-D -- Berlin rules.
Do you know the difference between a Hoover and a Harley? The location of the dirtbag.:~
"Welcome to Arizona!
Drive Nice - We're Armed..."
- Proposed Sign at CA/AZ Border -
How To Shower Like A Woman... * Take off clothing and place it in sectional laundry hamper according to lights and darks. * Walk to bathroom wearing long bathrobe. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. * Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat. * Get in shower. Look for face-cloth, arm-cloth, leg-cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. * Wash you hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. * Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. * Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on for 15 minutes. * Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red and raw. * Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash. * Rinse conditioner off of hair (this takes at least 15 minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off). * Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead. * Scream loudly when your boyfriend/husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure. * Turn off shower. * Squeegee off all wet surfaces inn the shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. * Get out of the shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African Country. * Wrap hair in super-absorbent second towel. * Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit. Attack with nails/tweezers if found. * Return to bedroom wearing bathrobe and towel on head. * If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and then rush to the bedroom to spend an hour-and-a-half getting dressed. How To Shower Like A Man... * Take off clothes while sitting in the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. * Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your girlfriend/wife along the way, flash her making the ''woo, woo'' sound. * Get in shower. Don't bother looking for a washcloth. You don't use one. * Wash your face. * Wash your armpits. * Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower. * Wash your privates and surronding area. * Wash your ass, leaving hair on the soap bar. * Shampoo your hair. Do not use conditioner. * Make a shampoo Mohawk. * Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror. * Pee (in the shower). * Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor bacause you left t
My version's more fun...;) Anna :rose: Homepage | Tears and Laughter "Be yourself - not what others think you should be" - Marcia Graesch "Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart" - A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work. Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Visual C++ Add-In
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Do you know the difference between a Hoover and a Harley? The location of the dirtbag.:~
"Welcome to Arizona!
Drive Nice - We're Armed..."
- Proposed Sign at CA/AZ BorderDo you know what kind of woman male harley owners prefers? Women who can suck start it. :-D -- Berlin rules.
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Do you know what kind of woman male harley owners prefers? Women who can suck start it. :-D -- Berlin rules.
Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Women who can suck start it. Yup! A woman who can suck-start a cold Harley from the tailpipe is in high demand here. Most of them can also suck a golf ball through a 50' garden hose, or remove the chrome from a trailer hitch using no hands. Of course they also usually weigh 440 lbs and have more tattoos than the Illustrated Man.
"Welcome to Arizona!
Drive Nice - We're Armed..."
- Proposed Sign at CA/AZ Border -
My version's more fun...;) Anna :rose: Homepage | Tears and Laughter "Be yourself - not what others think you should be" - Marcia Graesch "Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart" - A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work. Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Visual C++ Add-In
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hmmm... give us a clue.. ;)
Olli "Ooooooh, they have the internet on computers now!"
Homer Simpson
:beer: + :java: = NULL :=> X|I keep my vibrator in the shower. ;) Anna :rose: Homepage | Tears and Laughter "Be yourself - not what others think you should be" - Marcia Graesch "Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart" - A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work. Trouble with resource IDs? Try the Resource ID Organiser Visual C++ Add-In