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Woe to my developers

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • C Offline
    C Offline
    Chris Maunder
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

    cheers, Chris Maunder

    CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

    R C C L L 16 Replies Last reply
    0
    • C Chris Maunder

      ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

      cheers, Chris Maunder

      CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

      R Offline
      R Offline
      Ray Kinsella
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      :laugh: Chris is becoming a PHB!!!!!!!

      Regards Ray "Je Suis Mort De Rire" Blogging @ Keratoconus Watch

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      • C Chris Maunder

        ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

        cheers, Chris Maunder

        CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

        C Offline
        C Offline
        Chris Meech
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        I sure hope Wally doesn't work for you. Your in trouble if he does.

        Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] Nobody likes jerks. [espeir] The zen of the soapbox is hard to attain...[Jörgen Sigvardsson] I wish I could remember what it was like to only have a short term memory.[David Kentley]

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        • C Chris Maunder

          ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

          cheers, Chris Maunder

          CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

          C Offline
          C Offline
          Christopher Duncan
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Seems to me that if you've discovered Gantt charts, their lives are wretched enough to begin with... :-D

          Author of The Career Programmer and Unite the Tribes www.PracticalStrategyConsulting.com

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          • C Chris Maunder

            ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

            cheers, Chris Maunder

            CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

            L Offline
            L Offline
            leckey 0
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            mmmm....Gantt charts.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • C Chris Maunder

              ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

              cheers, Chris Maunder

              CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

              L Offline
              L Offline
              led mike
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              One who fears the Gnatt is lost.

              "Alot of the people on this forum are incredibly stupid, thinking that the internet is real"
              Score: 1.0 in the Soap Box

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • C Chris Maunder

                ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                cheers, Chris Maunder

                CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

                G Offline
                G Offline
                Gary Kirkham
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                In the beginning was the Plan. And then came the Assumptions. And the Assumptions were without form. And the Plan was without substance. And darkness was upon the face of the Workers. . . . .

                Gary Kirkham Forever Forgiven and Alive in the Spirit He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot Me blog, You read

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                • C Chris Maunder

                  ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                  cheers, Chris Maunder

                  CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

                  N Offline
                  N Offline
                  Nemanja Trifunovic
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  And those who survive Gant Charts, throw to FxCop


                  Programming Blog utf8-cpp

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • C Chris Maunder

                    ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                    cheers, Chris Maunder

                    CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

                    M Offline
                    M Offline
                    Marc Clifton
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Chris Maunder wrote:

                    He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                    [preacher mode] Who is the master and who is the slave? Are we not all slaves to the Gantt chart and timeline? Or is there a hierarchy of servitude? Free yourself from the chains of materialism! Time is relative! The work will get done when it is meant to be done, and no sooner! And only a divine power, more knowing than you, can say when something is meant to be done! You, Mr. Maunder, are the incarnation of the devil, basking in your false belief that you and your charts can control others! The only path to your soul's salvation is to burn those Gantt charts and timelines and free yourself to the light and divine power that cleanses you from fear of deadlines! Brothers, coworkers, come to Mr. Maunder's aid, now! Show him the divine light of inspiration so that he shall never more sin! [/preacher mode] Marc

                    Thyme In The Country

                    People are just notoriously impossible. --DavidCrow
                    There's NO excuse for not commenting your code. -- John Simmons / outlaw programmer
                    People who say that they will refactor their code later to make it "good" don't understand refactoring, nor the art and craft of programming. -- Josh Smith

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                    • G Gary Kirkham

                      In the beginning was the Plan. And then came the Assumptions. And the Assumptions were without form. And the Plan was without substance. And darkness was upon the face of the Workers. . . . .

                      Gary Kirkham Forever Forgiven and Alive in the Spirit He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot Me blog, You read

                      N Offline
                      N Offline
                      Nadajohn
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Awesome suddenly I see the light.

                      Stay Focused Dan

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                      • M Marc Clifton

                        Chris Maunder wrote:

                        He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                        [preacher mode] Who is the master and who is the slave? Are we not all slaves to the Gantt chart and timeline? Or is there a hierarchy of servitude? Free yourself from the chains of materialism! Time is relative! The work will get done when it is meant to be done, and no sooner! And only a divine power, more knowing than you, can say when something is meant to be done! You, Mr. Maunder, are the incarnation of the devil, basking in your false belief that you and your charts can control others! The only path to your soul's salvation is to burn those Gantt charts and timelines and free yourself to the light and divine power that cleanses you from fear of deadlines! Brothers, coworkers, come to Mr. Maunder's aid, now! Show him the divine light of inspiration so that he shall never more sin! [/preacher mode] Marc

                        Thyme In The Country

                        People are just notoriously impossible. --DavidCrow
                        There's NO excuse for not commenting your code. -- John Simmons / outlaw programmer
                        People who say that they will refactor their code later to make it "good" don't understand refactoring, nor the art and craft of programming. -- Josh Smith

                        D Offline
                        D Offline
                        Douglas Troy
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        Where's the 1-800 number so I can send money to help!?!?! :rolleyes:


                        :..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
                        Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTL

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                        • D Douglas Troy

                          Where's the 1-800 number so I can send money to help!?!?! :rolleyes:


                          :..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
                          Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTL

                          P Offline
                          P Offline
                          peterchen
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          just contact me in an private e-mail. Helping is so important! And I'm glad I can help you help!


                          We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
                          Linkify! || Fold With Us! || sighist

                          A 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • P peterchen

                            just contact me in an private e-mail. Helping is so important! And I'm glad I can help you help!


                            We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
                            Linkify! || Fold With Us! || sighist

                            A Offline
                            A Offline
                            Allen Anderson
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            I'm pretty sure he was making a televangelist joke. Dunno if they have those as much in other countries but here in the US...

                            P 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • C Chris Maunder

                              ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                              cheers, Chris Maunder

                              CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

                              R Offline
                              R Offline
                              Roger Wright
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              The chart is always right; reality often makes mistakes. The sooner your developers realize this, the happier their meaningless lives will appear to be.

                              "...a photo album is like Life, but flat and stuck to pages." - Shog9

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • C Chris Maunder

                                ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                                cheers, Chris Maunder

                                CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

                                M Offline
                                M Offline
                                Michael Dunn
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                I saw the words "Microsoft Project" and I started to see flashes of color before my eyes and I passed out.

                                --Mike-- Visual C++ MVP :cool: LINKS~! Ericahist | PimpFish | CP SearchBar v3.0 | C++ Forum FAQ

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • C Chris Maunder

                                  ...for I have discovered Microsoft Project and have bestowed upon them a multitude of Gantt Charts and timelines. He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                                  cheers, Chris Maunder

                                  CodeProject.com : C++ MVP

                                  C Offline
                                  C Offline
                                  code frog 0
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  Ugh! I hated MS Project with passion. I'm so glad I don't get prodded by those evil-forsaken-email updates anymore. Do yourself and your team a favor uninstall it and do management by walking around. The esteem and dedication of the team will benefit and you'll have "face-value" feedback both to and from your team. I always felt like Project became my mini-manager from my manager... Just my .0000000000002 cents. :rose:

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • G Gary Kirkham

                                    In the beginning was the Plan. And then came the Assumptions. And the Assumptions were without form. And the Plan was without substance. And darkness was upon the face of the Workers. . . . .

                                    Gary Kirkham Forever Forgiven and Alive in the Spirit He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot Me blog, You read

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    code frog 0
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    I really like that. I wonder how Genesis would read if it was converted to IT speak. "The admin picked up a stone and killed ableserver01 and reformatted it causing the compay to lose all their data. For this Cain was demoted to the help desk and had to wander aimlessly offering IT help until he found a job with Geek Squad."

                                    G 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • M Marc Clifton

                                      Chris Maunder wrote:

                                      He who foresaketh to update thou little black line of progress shall be wrteched indeed.

                                      [preacher mode] Who is the master and who is the slave? Are we not all slaves to the Gantt chart and timeline? Or is there a hierarchy of servitude? Free yourself from the chains of materialism! Time is relative! The work will get done when it is meant to be done, and no sooner! And only a divine power, more knowing than you, can say when something is meant to be done! You, Mr. Maunder, are the incarnation of the devil, basking in your false belief that you and your charts can control others! The only path to your soul's salvation is to burn those Gantt charts and timelines and free yourself to the light and divine power that cleanses you from fear of deadlines! Brothers, coworkers, come to Mr. Maunder's aid, now! Show him the divine light of inspiration so that he shall never more sin! [/preacher mode] Marc

                                      Thyme In The Country

                                      People are just notoriously impossible. --DavidCrow
                                      There's NO excuse for not commenting your code. -- John Simmons / outlaw programmer
                                      People who say that they will refactor their code later to make it "good" don't understand refactoring, nor the art and craft of programming. -- Josh Smith

                                      C Offline
                                      C Offline
                                      code frog 0
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Please send 4 m3 the c0des 2 do this! I will p4y 8000 m0nies for the c0des!;P

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • C code frog 0

                                        I really like that. I wonder how Genesis would read if it was converted to IT speak. "The admin picked up a stone and killed ableserver01 and reformatted it causing the compay to lose all their data. For this Cain was demoted to the help desk and had to wander aimlessly offering IT help until he found a job with Geek Squad."

                                        G Offline
                                        G Offline
                                        Gary Kirkham
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        code-frog wrote:

                                        he found a job with Geek Squad

                                        Those cars they drive are kinda cool :)

                                        Gary Kirkham Forever Forgiven and Alive in the Spirit He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot Me blog, You read

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • C code frog 0

                                          I really like that. I wonder how Genesis would read if it was converted to IT speak. "The admin picked up a stone and killed ableserver01 and reformatted it causing the compay to lose all their data. For this Cain was demoted to the help desk and had to wander aimlessly offering IT help until he found a job with Geek Squad."

                                          G Offline
                                          G Offline
                                          Gary Kirkham
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          P.S. I didn't make that up and there is more to it...google will show you the rest.

                                          Gary Kirkham Forever Forgiven and Alive in the Spirit He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliot Me blog, You read

                                          C 1 Reply Last reply
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