Holiday gift suggestion ...
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And bring his two worlds colliding? There is Relationship George, and there is Independent George...you are killing Independent George! A George divided against itself... cannot stand!
"Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weasling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel." - Homer Simpson Web - Blog - RSS - Math - LinkedIn - BM
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Just a "bit" inappropriate ... and far too soon.
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
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Zac Howland wrote:
... and far too soon.
If you haven't scored after 3 weeks maybe you should be thinking more about what she might give you! Perhaps booze would be the best gift to get her?
Wjousts wrote:
If you haven't scored after 3 weeks maybe you should be thinking more about what she might give you!
:rolleyes:
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
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Red Stateler wrote:
Statistically your marriage is much more likely to end in divorce if you lived together prior to marriage. Marriage requires work, and I think if you live together, there's nothing to force compromise.
That is where my approach differs. If you can't live together as if you were married and be happy, you won't be able to do so if you actually are married. Marriage doesn't fix any problems, it only creates new ones to solve. If you can't fix the ones you have when you just live together, you won't be able to survive marriage (at least that has been my experience ... though, I've never gotten down the aisle either). Statistically speaking, marriages entered into just so you could have sex (which is the pitfall of the True Love Waits campaign in my opinion) are just as likely to end in divorce.
Red Stateler wrote:
During the day, she does the pool boy.
Ah, at least you are comfortable with the whole Desperate Housewives lifestyle now ... it will make things easier down the road ;)
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
Zac Howland wrote:
That is where my approach differs. If you can't live together as if you were married and be happy, you won't be able to do so if you actually are married. Marriage doesn't fix any problems, it only creates new ones to solve. If you can't fix the ones you have when you just live together, you won't be able to survive marriage (at least that has been my experience ... though, I've never gotten down the aisle either).
That's the absolute reversal of truth. Marriage forces you to fix problems (if you actually respect marriage for what it is) because it is designed as a permanent bond. The only reason to fix any problems when living together is out of convenience. If you approach marriage selfishly and expect to make no concessions, then it will certainly fail. Living together without permanent commitment is selfish since it's designed to provide a self-assurance of comfort with your mate (often at the expense of the other party). That may be why marriages started by living together first are so apt to failure.
Zac Howland wrote:
Statistically speaking, marriages entered into just so you could have sex (which is the pitfall of the True Love Waits campaign in my opinion) are just as likely to end in divorce.
Again, that's a selfish reason to enter into marriage which is contrary to its purpose.
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Zac Howland wrote:
That is where my approach differs. If you can't live together as if you were married and be happy, you won't be able to do so if you actually are married. Marriage doesn't fix any problems, it only creates new ones to solve. If you can't fix the ones you have when you just live together, you won't be able to survive marriage (at least that has been my experience ... though, I've never gotten down the aisle either).
That's the absolute reversal of truth. Marriage forces you to fix problems (if you actually respect marriage for what it is) because it is designed as a permanent bond. The only reason to fix any problems when living together is out of convenience. If you approach marriage selfishly and expect to make no concessions, then it will certainly fail. Living together without permanent commitment is selfish since it's designed to provide a self-assurance of comfort with your mate (often at the expense of the other party). That may be why marriages started by living together first are so apt to failure.
Zac Howland wrote:
Statistically speaking, marriages entered into just so you could have sex (which is the pitfall of the True Love Waits campaign in my opinion) are just as likely to end in divorce.
Again, that's a selfish reason to enter into marriage which is contrary to its purpose.
Red Stateler wrote:
That's the absolute reversal of truth. Marriage forces you to fix problems (if you actually respect marriage for what it is) because it is designed as a permanent bond. The only reason to fix any problems when living together is out of convenience. If you approach marriage selfishly and expect to make no concessions, then it will certainly fail. Living together without permanent commitment is selfish since it's designed to provide a self-assurance of comfort with your mate (often at the expense of the other party). That may be why marriages started by living together first are so apt to failure.
We'll have to agree to disagree there.
Red Stateler wrote:
Again, that's a selfish reason to enter into marriage which is contrary to its purpose.
Selfish though it may be, it is reality.
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
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Zac Howland wrote:
I do hope it took you longer than 3 weeks to get to that point though
Yeah, I took her to the Virgin Islands to propose after having been dating for about 11 months (I'm a romantic, so listening to me might not be a good idea).
Zac Howland wrote:
So did you get her Christmas gifts AND birthday presents?
Actually we had met right around Christmas, so I don't think I got her a Christmas present (I was also out of town). I do hate it, though, because I'll buy her a Christmas present and then realize I need to get her a birthday present after a couple weeks. This year I got her a Dior handbag ($1,000, but on sale for only $700!) for Christmas and now need to think of what I'll get her for her birthday in just a couple weeks. I'm probably going to spend the same amount on earrings. Chicks are expensive. It's better if you just invest your money in ETFs instead.
Red Stateler wrote:
Dior handbag ($1,000, but on sale for only $700!)
I find this odd. First, you're buying the name Dior because why? It's cool? It's like high school when you have to wear the right brand of jeans to be in the In Crowd. Seems like conforming--a leftist idea isn't it? Not all chicks are expensive. I'd smack my husband if he spent that much money on a worthless item. It would be one thing if it had true value, but the bag is going to get used and eventually ruined. Your wife is obviously materialistic--I can see why you like her so much. Well, I guess she'll have something to focus on while she's in labor for the umpeenth time. BTW, when most girls see a Louis Vitton bag or something like that we assume it's fake and trying to look hip. If you have the money to WASTE on a real one then you are as much of a joke. You are either a poser or a materialistic poser. Seems like even I have a better idea of what the meaning of Christmas is than you.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
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Red Stateler wrote:
Dior handbag ($1,000, but on sale for only $700!)
I find this odd. First, you're buying the name Dior because why? It's cool? It's like high school when you have to wear the right brand of jeans to be in the In Crowd. Seems like conforming--a leftist idea isn't it? Not all chicks are expensive. I'd smack my husband if he spent that much money on a worthless item. It would be one thing if it had true value, but the bag is going to get used and eventually ruined. Your wife is obviously materialistic--I can see why you like her so much. Well, I guess she'll have something to focus on while she's in labor for the umpeenth time. BTW, when most girls see a Louis Vitton bag or something like that we assume it's fake and trying to look hip. If you have the money to WASTE on a real one then you are as much of a joke. You are either a poser or a materialistic poser. Seems like even I have a better idea of what the meaning of Christmas is than you.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
Ouch ... that was a bit harsh ... Back on topic, I'd love a female's opinion on this topic ...
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
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Red Stateler wrote:
Dior handbag ($1,000, but on sale for only $700!)
I find this odd. First, you're buying the name Dior because why? It's cool? It's like high school when you have to wear the right brand of jeans to be in the In Crowd. Seems like conforming--a leftist idea isn't it? Not all chicks are expensive. I'd smack my husband if he spent that much money on a worthless item. It would be one thing if it had true value, but the bag is going to get used and eventually ruined. Your wife is obviously materialistic--I can see why you like her so much. Well, I guess she'll have something to focus on while she's in labor for the umpeenth time. BTW, when most girls see a Louis Vitton bag or something like that we assume it's fake and trying to look hip. If you have the money to WASTE on a real one then you are as much of a joke. You are either a poser or a materialistic poser. Seems like even I have a better idea of what the meaning of Christmas is than you.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
I've heard this tirade before. It typically comes from jealous poor people. Put it this way, if you ever shopped anywhere other than Wal-Mart, someone in a trailer is feeling the same way about you as you feel about me right now.
leckey wrote:
Seems like even I have a better idea of what the meaning of Christmas is than you.
And that is...Bitterness derived from envy?
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I've heard this tirade before. It typically comes from jealous poor people. Put it this way, if you ever shopped anywhere other than Wal-Mart, someone in a trailer is feeling the same way about you as you feel about me right now.
leckey wrote:
Seems like even I have a better idea of what the meaning of Christmas is than you.
And that is...Bitterness derived from envy?
hate to break this to you, but I have a lot of money I can waste on handbags, clothes, vacations...I put a higher value on other things like CHARITY. But that's so leftist. Especailly at Christmas. No one should give money at Christmas--helps those leftist agendas.
Red Stateler wrote:
Bitterness derived from envy?
I have ZERO desire to be driven by materialistic goods/brand names. You think it's jealousy because you are small-minded. I'm driven by my heart and doing the right thing. The only thing I'm bitter about is the waste of money that you could give to a charity/research to help others besides those around you who make you feel more important. I'm quite content in knowing that when it's all said and done I made more moral choices than material choices.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
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Ouch ... that was a bit harsh ... Back on topic, I'd love a female's opinion on this topic ...
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
Harsh? He's on here every day spewing how everyone who differs in opinion from himself must be nothing more that an idiot. What's sad is no matter how anyone tries to get him to even LOOK at another perspective (not persuade, just look) he's like a little kid with his fingers in his ears screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!" My female opinion on holiday gifts? Give something that means something. Take a scrapbooking course and do a nice photo of you and your honey and do a scrapbooking page and put it in a frame/shadowbox. Clean her entire house/apartment. Or hire someone to do it. (Even I hate scrubbing the bathtub.) Give her a 'coupon' that she can redeem for a day of nothing but what she wants to do and you can't complain. Even if she shops for five hours and then goes to the zoo. Write down how you felt the first time you met, or kissed. My best holiday memories are of a couple lean years when I was in college. We had fun playing games. We found junk the other forgot about and re-wrapped them. (Oh, I forgot I had this!) The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
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hate to break this to you, but I have a lot of money I can waste on handbags, clothes, vacations...I put a higher value on other things like CHARITY. But that's so leftist. Especailly at Christmas. No one should give money at Christmas--helps those leftist agendas.
Red Stateler wrote:
Bitterness derived from envy?
I have ZERO desire to be driven by materialistic goods/brand names. You think it's jealousy because you are small-minded. I'm driven by my heart and doing the right thing. The only thing I'm bitter about is the waste of money that you could give to a charity/research to help others besides those around you who make you feel more important. I'm quite content in knowing that when it's all said and done I made more moral choices than material choices.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
Normally I would chastise you for randomly entering into criticisms of people you've never met for buying their wives expensive presents while praising your supposed vast charitable contributions that you make to make yourself feel more important. But being the Christmas season, I'll refrain. After all, this is the season to respect and uplift your fellow man...Not bring him down in order to make you feel better about yourself.
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Harsh? He's on here every day spewing how everyone who differs in opinion from himself must be nothing more that an idiot. What's sad is no matter how anyone tries to get him to even LOOK at another perspective (not persuade, just look) he's like a little kid with his fingers in his ears screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!" My female opinion on holiday gifts? Give something that means something. Take a scrapbooking course and do a nice photo of you and your honey and do a scrapbooking page and put it in a frame/shadowbox. Clean her entire house/apartment. Or hire someone to do it. (Even I hate scrubbing the bathtub.) Give her a 'coupon' that she can redeem for a day of nothing but what she wants to do and you can't complain. Even if she shops for five hours and then goes to the zoo. Write down how you felt the first time you met, or kissed. My best holiday memories are of a couple lean years when I was in college. We had fun playing games. We found junk the other forgot about and re-wrapped them. (Oh, I forgot I had this!) The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
leckey wrote:
The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
What's really interesting is that's what you took away from the fact that I got my wife an expensive handbag for Christmas. Nobody except you implied this. That leads me to believe that perhaps you believe that the price of a gift is correlated to love and perhaps your husband bought you a McDonald's gift certificate.
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Harsh? He's on here every day spewing how everyone who differs in opinion from himself must be nothing more that an idiot. What's sad is no matter how anyone tries to get him to even LOOK at another perspective (not persuade, just look) he's like a little kid with his fingers in his ears screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!" My female opinion on holiday gifts? Give something that means something. Take a scrapbooking course and do a nice photo of you and your honey and do a scrapbooking page and put it in a frame/shadowbox. Clean her entire house/apartment. Or hire someone to do it. (Even I hate scrubbing the bathtub.) Give her a 'coupon' that she can redeem for a day of nothing but what she wants to do and you can't complain. Even if she shops for five hours and then goes to the zoo. Write down how you felt the first time you met, or kissed. My best holiday memories are of a couple lean years when I was in college. We had fun playing games. We found junk the other forgot about and re-wrapped them. (Oh, I forgot I had this!) The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
leckey wrote:
Harsh? He's on here every day spewing how everyone who differs in opinion from himself must be nothing more that an idiot. What's sad is no matter how anyone tries to get him to even LOOK at another perspective (not persuade, just look) he's like a little kid with his fingers in his ears screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!"
Well, harsh in that I was trying to keep this thread flame-free ;P Only had limited success with that, but I guess I can't expect too much in that regard.
leckey wrote:
My female opinion on holiday gifts? Give something that means something. Take a scrapbooking course and do a nice photo of you and your honey and do a scrapbooking page and put it in a frame/shadowbox. Clean her entire house/apartment. Or hire someone to do it. (Even I hate scrubbing the bathtub.) Give her a 'coupon' that she can redeem for a day of nothing but what she wants to do and you can't complain. Even if she shops for five hours and then goes to the zoo. Write down how you felt the first time you met, or kissed.
See, my problem isn't so much that I don't know what to get her, its that we haven't been seeing each other long enough to do the types of things you mention. Even if we had started seeing each other before my birthday, it would be easier. Since we have only been seeing each other for a few weeks ... hence the problem.
leckey wrote:
The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
While I completely agree with this, and I'm generally pretty good with gift giving, but this situation is a little different. It is MUCH too soon to say "love" ... we are still in the "get to know you ... really like you" phase.
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
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leckey wrote:
Harsh? He's on here every day spewing how everyone who differs in opinion from himself must be nothing more that an idiot. What's sad is no matter how anyone tries to get him to even LOOK at another perspective (not persuade, just look) he's like a little kid with his fingers in his ears screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!"
Well, harsh in that I was trying to keep this thread flame-free ;P Only had limited success with that, but I guess I can't expect too much in that regard.
leckey wrote:
My female opinion on holiday gifts? Give something that means something. Take a scrapbooking course and do a nice photo of you and your honey and do a scrapbooking page and put it in a frame/shadowbox. Clean her entire house/apartment. Or hire someone to do it. (Even I hate scrubbing the bathtub.) Give her a 'coupon' that she can redeem for a day of nothing but what she wants to do and you can't complain. Even if she shops for five hours and then goes to the zoo. Write down how you felt the first time you met, or kissed.
See, my problem isn't so much that I don't know what to get her, its that we haven't been seeing each other long enough to do the types of things you mention. Even if we had started seeing each other before my birthday, it would be easier. Since we have only been seeing each other for a few weeks ... hence the problem.
leckey wrote:
The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
While I completely agree with this, and I'm generally pretty good with gift giving, but this situation is a little different. It is MUCH too soon to say "love" ... we are still in the "get to know you ... really like you" phase.
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
Zac Howland wrote:
While I completely agree with this, and I'm generally pretty good with gift giving, but this situation is a little different. It is MUCH too soon to say "love" ... we are still in the "get to know you ... really like you" phase.
You should definately go with the coupon book to clean her toilets, then. That's REALLY romantic! :laugh:
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Zac Howland wrote:
While I completely agree with this, and I'm generally pretty good with gift giving, but this situation is a little different. It is MUCH too soon to say "love" ... we are still in the "get to know you ... really like you" phase.
You should definately go with the coupon book to clean her toilets, then. That's REALLY romantic! :laugh:
That would actually be kind of pointless right now ... she just cleaned her house the other day ;P
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
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leckey wrote:
The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
What's really interesting is that's what you took away from the fact that I got my wife an expensive handbag for Christmas. Nobody except you implied this. That leads me to believe that perhaps you believe that the price of a gift is correlated to love and perhaps your husband bought you a McDonald's gift certificate.
Red Stateler wrote:
That leads me to believe that perhaps you believe that the price of a gift is correlated to love
Since you highlighted my statement in your response you would see that I said THE EXACT OPPOSITE. But then again, you were never very good with logic. I don't care what my husband gives me for holidays/birthdays/anniversaries. I just like to be with him. If he spend $20 and it was something he put a lot of effort into (thinking, planning, etc) I would be happier than if he spent $100 on something that he put no thought into.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
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leckey wrote:
Harsh? He's on here every day spewing how everyone who differs in opinion from himself must be nothing more that an idiot. What's sad is no matter how anyone tries to get him to even LOOK at another perspective (not persuade, just look) he's like a little kid with his fingers in his ears screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!"
Well, harsh in that I was trying to keep this thread flame-free ;P Only had limited success with that, but I guess I can't expect too much in that regard.
leckey wrote:
My female opinion on holiday gifts? Give something that means something. Take a scrapbooking course and do a nice photo of you and your honey and do a scrapbooking page and put it in a frame/shadowbox. Clean her entire house/apartment. Or hire someone to do it. (Even I hate scrubbing the bathtub.) Give her a 'coupon' that she can redeem for a day of nothing but what she wants to do and you can't complain. Even if she shops for five hours and then goes to the zoo. Write down how you felt the first time you met, or kissed.
See, my problem isn't so much that I don't know what to get her, its that we haven't been seeing each other long enough to do the types of things you mention. Even if we had started seeing each other before my birthday, it would be easier. Since we have only been seeing each other for a few weeks ... hence the problem.
leckey wrote:
The amount of money spent does not equate with your amount of love. Gifts are nice but at the end of the day they don't love you back.
While I completely agree with this, and I'm generally pretty good with gift giving, but this situation is a little different. It is MUCH too soon to say "love" ... we are still in the "get to know you ... really like you" phase.
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
If I were in your situation I would try to make a food item that you know she loves, that you have never cooked before. (Like cheesecake maybe?) It's one of those things, that if you try and fail, it will be 'cute' and endearing to her. If you succeed on your first try then you look like the hero. Or is there a play/band in the area soon that you can buy tickets for? That might be a nice surprise.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
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That would actually be kind of pointless right now ... she just cleaned her house the other day ;P
If you decide to become a software engineer, you are signing up to have a 1/2" piece of silicon tell you exactly how stupid you really are for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week Zac
By the way, what's your Christmas dinner menu? I just found out that I'm in charge again this year because the in-laws liked my kalamata-encrusted rack of lamb so much last year. So far I'm thinking... 1) Arugula salad with walnuts/gorgonzola/vinagrette 2) Gougeres (either blue or goat cheese) 3) Horseradish encrusted Prime Rib Roast (maybe with au jus) 4) A chocolate-covered-strawberry Christmas tree and/or cake of some sort. Plus the before and after dinner treats and drinks.
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Normally I would chastise you for randomly entering into criticisms of people you've never met for buying their wives expensive presents while praising your supposed vast charitable contributions that you make to make yourself feel more important. But being the Christmas season, I'll refrain. After all, this is the season to respect and uplift your fellow man...Not bring him down in order to make you feel better about yourself.
Red Stateler wrote:
Not bring him down in order to make you feel better about yourself
Trying to knock some sense into anyone does not give me feel better about myself.
Red Stateler wrote:
But being the Christmas season
Does this mean you are going to refrain from insulting everyone on the board for the next week? Now THAT is a Christmas miracle. [wipes her hands and walks away]
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
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Red Stateler wrote:
That leads me to believe that perhaps you believe that the price of a gift is correlated to love
Since you highlighted my statement in your response you would see that I said THE EXACT OPPOSITE. But then again, you were never very good with logic. I don't care what my husband gives me for holidays/birthdays/anniversaries. I just like to be with him. If he spend $20 and it was something he put a lot of effort into (thinking, planning, etc) I would be happier than if he spent $100 on something that he put no thought into.
____________________________________________________ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be for you.
leckey wrote:
Since you highlighted my statement in your response you would see that I said THE EXACT OPPOSITE. But then again, you were never very good with logic.
You mean that statement that summarized your whole post? Methinks you doth protest too much...
leckey wrote:
I don't care what my husband gives me for holidays/birthdays/anniversaries. I just like to be with him. If he spend $20 and it was something he put a lot of effort into (thinking, planning, etc) I would be happier than if he spent $100 on something that he put no thought into.
Same goes for my wife. However, being that I love her so much, I do my best to provide her with every comfort I can. I just find it interesting that you so strongly protest to the fact that I got her a Dior handbag. It's pretty irrational and out of left field given the tone of this thread. Also given that you suffer no personal injury from my buying her such a handbag, I find it odd that you take such great offense to it. To me it suggests nothing but jealousy. If you had simply said, "That's a lot of money for a handbag. I'd rather have a coupon book", that's one thing. But you didn't. Your intense focus on the matter indicates much more...