What would a [insert language] programmer look like?
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Can't believe a link to Strawberry Shortcake has been posted on this board!!
True, Happy Tree Friends would be much better - not work safe so no link!
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It is well known that for COM programming, you need a beard and glasses.
Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Velopers, Develprs, Developers!
We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
Linkify!|Fold With Us!Can I just have the glasses?
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Perfect! But which are you?
I started as C++ but now with the all the site development I've become a little precious and high maintenance.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
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C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you. VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that. C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful. Java: Despite their weasel-like appearance and demeanor, these programmers are kind, generous folk at heart. Web: Functioning alcoholics. SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
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...the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more...
Shog9 wrote:
C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you.
Shog9 wrote:
C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful.
Then I am using wrong language :-O
"Throughout human history, we have been dependent on machines to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony. " - Morpheus
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From observations at conferences: (and this will probably offend, oh, everyone...) VB: Plus size, bad dress sense. No more doughnuts for you lads. C#: The Khaki and golf shirt crowd. A little bright eyed and bushy tailed for my jaded sensibilities. C++: Lean, intense and balding. Often into rock climbing or mountain climbing DBAs: Large mountain men. Dave and I have fond memories of being in a SQL session and looking in awe at the size of the guys in the room. Clearly they don't just write SQL. They physically wrestle and beat the data out of the SQL servers. WebDevs: Goatees and soul patches. A little precious sometimes. Architects: Odd. You have the feeling they are mentally rearranging your brain to make it work better as they talk to you. And then there are the Aging Rock Stars, the guys who were big a few years ago: Developing paunch, greying hair, wise and sometimes sad or cynical eyes. Excellent to sit next to in keynote talks. Partial to a drink. Sometimes during the keynotes.
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
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C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you. VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that. C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful. Java: Despite their weasel-like appearance and demeanor, these programmers are kind, generous folk at heart. Web: Functioning alcoholics. SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
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...the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more...
Shog9 wrote:
VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that.
Ohh Ohhh Ohhhh... :laugh:
CleaKO
"I think you'll be okay here, they have a thin candy shell. 'Surprised you didn't know that." - Tommy Boy
"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!" - Frank the Tank (Old School) -
Note to UKians: suspenders is USian for braces. Though I'm sure that a few UNIX gurus do wear suspenders in the UK sense...
What do you mean by braces?
CleaKO
"I think you'll be okay here, they have a thin candy shell. 'Surprised you didn't know that." - Tommy Boy
"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!" - Frank the Tank (Old School) -
Rama Krishna Vavilala wrote:
every now and then screaming 'Yeah! It worked'
That's me using C# when trying to find a CScrollView equivalent, followed by a frail scream as I realise it doesn't actually work, then repeated thuds of my head on the desk. :mad: Without that I cannot achieve my aura of C# superiority and must remain under the depilatory effects of VC6. :^)
Steve_Harris wrote:
Without that I cannot achieve my aura of C# superiority
There's always VB! :->
CleaKO
"I think you'll be okay here, they have a thin candy shell. 'Surprised you didn't know that." - Tommy Boy
"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!" - Frank the Tank (Old School) -
What do you mean by braces?
CleaKO
"I think you'll be okay here, they have a thin candy shell. 'Surprised you didn't know that." - Tommy Boy
"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!" - Frank the Tank (Old School)Braces hold up men's trousers. Suspenders hold up ladies' stockings. Men wearing suspenders in the UK is reserved for high court judges and Conservative politicians. Personally, I blame the private schools.
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
I'm going to tell you how i look like, and that's going to help you ID those people. I'm an VB.net (was a VB6), DBA (mySQL, MS-SQL) and a little knowledge of PHP and even less Javascript. I'm also in hardware. I'm dressing up conservative in winter with good pants, shirt, V or not style sweater and elegant 'not the anarchist style' leather jacket. In summer, t-shirt (with an artistic or technology theme stamp), survival jacket for keeping flash sticks, pens and quarters for the coffee machine, wide fabric pants but not the hip-hop style or if the situation is more formal, Jean with bright color shirt AND (a MUST) sleeves rolled up just below to elbows because they can get dirty if you reach for a cable or typing. When programming and things go smoothly (rare case), the desktop (the real desk i mean) is a MESS with coffee, snacks, .. etc. When programming and it's really difficult (problem or brainstorming), i tend to curve by back kinda like trying to put my eyes closer to the keyboard and the screen. It's an instict of programmers that feel like they're missing something because they're too far from the monitor. When enjoying programming, the coffee (if one drinks coffee) mug looks as it's been there for days but if there is coffee in it (more than the middle) than the programmer is actually enjoying so much that he forgot to drink ... If the mug looks wet (recently used) and empty before 8:00am he's under stress. If the mug if full even by 12:00am, obviously he wasn't there :laugh: In a conversation, i NEVER talk about programming or how i would do a task. I deal with that cr..p at work and i don't really feel like spending another sec explaining. If someone asks me if this can be done, i always say 'Yes, but it's going to take some time'. If the shit hits the fan, we never panic (we're at panic mode the rest of the time) because there is really no point. If a deadline is close, we slow down because if we were working 120% from the start of the project and we're still going to miss the deadline, we might as well relax and find the time to rest. If we get fired ..... it means that we're good at our job because anyone who creates buggy code or does something wrong, the company keeps, hopping he'll reverse the damage and correct whatever is wrong. !!!
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
I'm 6'2, 215lbs, and workout constantly with clean-cut blond hair and a pointy nose with no glasses. I wear dockers and polo shirts and cowboy boots. And when I am not on a diet I consume Dr. Pepper like water. When I went to the IBM programming competition in college the free shirts didn't fit because my arms were to big. (The sleeves were cut like twigs, only programmers and single digit kids would fit) With that said, I don't think there is really a norm. Any great programmer, of course, would be an artist in his or her craft requiring a devotion that goes well beyond the 9 to 5 with late nights at home programming for fun or beta testing some new piece of software (WoW :)). To be stereotypical of course the answer would always be the same: programmers would be small and meek, passive but insanely brilliant with sharp eyes and glasses; almost exclusively male. Unix admins would be the same only heavyset and bearded. Hygiene would run the gamut from poor to brushes teeth in morning.
File Not Found
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Can I just have the glasses?
Ladies are of course exempt from the beard requirement. But unfortunately, since we programmers are absolutely gender-neutral, there will be initial suspicion of lesser competence towards anyone unbeared. :~ It's a hard world for a men, I tell you...
Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Velopers, Develprs, Developers!
We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
Linkify!|Fold With Us! -
A nerd is someone socially challenged with bad dress sense. A geek is someone who obsesses about a topic. "To geek out".
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
Chris Maunder wrote:
A geek is someone who obsesses about a topic. "To geek out".
That's what the geeks want you to think, in an effort to become accepted by society. -- modified at 11:03 Wednesday 14th March, 2007 P.S. I don't know how the meanings got confused after the 1980s.
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I'm 6'2, 215lbs, and workout constantly with clean-cut blond hair and a pointy nose with no glasses. I wear dockers and polo shirts and cowboy boots. And when I am not on a diet I consume Dr. Pepper like water. When I went to the IBM programming competition in college the free shirts didn't fit because my arms were to big. (The sleeves were cut like twigs, only programmers and single digit kids would fit) With that said, I don't think there is really a norm. Any great programmer, of course, would be an artist in his or her craft requiring a devotion that goes well beyond the 9 to 5 with late nights at home programming for fun or beta testing some new piece of software (WoW :)). To be stereotypical of course the answer would always be the same: programmers would be small and meek, passive but insanely brilliant with sharp eyes and glasses; almost exclusively male. Unix admins would be the same only heavyset and bearded. Hygiene would run the gamut from poor to brushes teeth in morning.
File Not Found
I've know guys who kept a toothbrush at the office and brushed after lunch. (Momma's boy.)
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If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
Sunrise Wallpaper Project | The StartPage Randomizer | A Random Web Page
Miszou wrote:
If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
More specifically: Unix man implies: hasBeard && (isOverweight || isWearing(blackHeavyMetalLogoTshirt) || isWearing(blackHeavyMetalPlatformBootsThatLookSomewhatLesbian)) And I'd be tempted to say that VB man implies that the programmer hasn't stopped wearing a nappy, but that'd be unfair ;)
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
...what? No RPG programmers? CLP? ...CLLE? ...REXX/400?? Are we a dying breed...? :(( RPG(IV or ILE, not III or prior): Demeanor: Suave, yet a little strange. Very odd sense of humor--primarily consisting of bad puns. Appears excited when a fellow punster challenges wit. Appearance: Not balding, but not far from it. Appears stressed constantly. Coffee is present, possibly with coffee maker on desk. Cup is cleaned every other Friday...maybe. Cheezit consumption from 10:00-10:15 am. Often forages for chocolates or other goodies. :cool: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Information Systems - Programmer / Network Administrator IBM AS/400: ILE RPG IV, CL, SQL/400, REXX/400 PC: Visual Basic, T-SQL, Microsoft Access Internet: HTML, ASP, ADO, JavaScript, VBScript, CSS, AJAX)
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lol, Suspenders are very different in English from what they are in American ;-) Russell
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lol, Suspenders are very different in English from what they are in American ;-) Russell
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Chris Maunder wrote:
Precious == a little high maintenance, a little delicate sometimes.
Ahh... I see. Here, Strawberry Shortcake[^] is precious.
-- Russell Morris Morbo: "WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!"
OMG what an awesome web site! It's so well-designed ;P
"Quality Software since 1983!"
http://www.smoothjazzy.com/ - see the "Programming" section for freeware tools and articles. -
I've know guys who kept a toothbrush at the office and brushed after lunch. (Momma's boy.)
I only do that because my teeth aren't straight and I get things stuck in them, and nobody ever tells me about it!
"Quality Software since 1983!"
http://www.smoothjazzy.com/ - see the "Programming" section for freeware tools and articles.