What would a [insert language] programmer look like?
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What do you mean by braces?
CleaKO
"I think you'll be okay here, they have a thin candy shell. 'Surprised you didn't know that." - Tommy Boy
"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!" - Frank the Tank (Old School)Braces hold up men's trousers. Suspenders hold up ladies' stockings. Men wearing suspenders in the UK is reserved for high court judges and Conservative politicians. Personally, I blame the private schools.
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
I'm going to tell you how i look like, and that's going to help you ID those people. I'm an VB.net (was a VB6), DBA (mySQL, MS-SQL) and a little knowledge of PHP and even less Javascript. I'm also in hardware. I'm dressing up conservative in winter with good pants, shirt, V or not style sweater and elegant 'not the anarchist style' leather jacket. In summer, t-shirt (with an artistic or technology theme stamp), survival jacket for keeping flash sticks, pens and quarters for the coffee machine, wide fabric pants but not the hip-hop style or if the situation is more formal, Jean with bright color shirt AND (a MUST) sleeves rolled up just below to elbows because they can get dirty if you reach for a cable or typing. When programming and things go smoothly (rare case), the desktop (the real desk i mean) is a MESS with coffee, snacks, .. etc. When programming and it's really difficult (problem or brainstorming), i tend to curve by back kinda like trying to put my eyes closer to the keyboard and the screen. It's an instict of programmers that feel like they're missing something because they're too far from the monitor. When enjoying programming, the coffee (if one drinks coffee) mug looks as it's been there for days but if there is coffee in it (more than the middle) than the programmer is actually enjoying so much that he forgot to drink ... If the mug looks wet (recently used) and empty before 8:00am he's under stress. If the mug if full even by 12:00am, obviously he wasn't there :laugh: In a conversation, i NEVER talk about programming or how i would do a task. I deal with that cr..p at work and i don't really feel like spending another sec explaining. If someone asks me if this can be done, i always say 'Yes, but it's going to take some time'. If the shit hits the fan, we never panic (we're at panic mode the rest of the time) because there is really no point. If a deadline is close, we slow down because if we were working 120% from the start of the project and we're still going to miss the deadline, we might as well relax and find the time to rest. If we get fired ..... it means that we're good at our job because anyone who creates buggy code or does something wrong, the company keeps, hopping he'll reverse the damage and correct whatever is wrong. !!!
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
I'm 6'2, 215lbs, and workout constantly with clean-cut blond hair and a pointy nose with no glasses. I wear dockers and polo shirts and cowboy boots. And when I am not on a diet I consume Dr. Pepper like water. When I went to the IBM programming competition in college the free shirts didn't fit because my arms were to big. (The sleeves were cut like twigs, only programmers and single digit kids would fit) With that said, I don't think there is really a norm. Any great programmer, of course, would be an artist in his or her craft requiring a devotion that goes well beyond the 9 to 5 with late nights at home programming for fun or beta testing some new piece of software (WoW :)). To be stereotypical of course the answer would always be the same: programmers would be small and meek, passive but insanely brilliant with sharp eyes and glasses; almost exclusively male. Unix admins would be the same only heavyset and bearded. Hygiene would run the gamut from poor to brushes teeth in morning.
File Not Found
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Can I just have the glasses?
Ladies are of course exempt from the beard requirement. But unfortunately, since we programmers are absolutely gender-neutral, there will be initial suspicion of lesser competence towards anyone unbeared. :~ It's a hard world for a men, I tell you...
Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Velopers, Develprs, Developers!
We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
Linkify!|Fold With Us! -
A nerd is someone socially challenged with bad dress sense. A geek is someone who obsesses about a topic. "To geek out".
cheers, Chris Maunder
CodeProject.com : C++ MVP
Chris Maunder wrote:
A geek is someone who obsesses about a topic. "To geek out".
That's what the geeks want you to think, in an effort to become accepted by society. -- modified at 11:03 Wednesday 14th March, 2007 P.S. I don't know how the meanings got confused after the 1980s.
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I'm 6'2, 215lbs, and workout constantly with clean-cut blond hair and a pointy nose with no glasses. I wear dockers and polo shirts and cowboy boots. And when I am not on a diet I consume Dr. Pepper like water. When I went to the IBM programming competition in college the free shirts didn't fit because my arms were to big. (The sleeves were cut like twigs, only programmers and single digit kids would fit) With that said, I don't think there is really a norm. Any great programmer, of course, would be an artist in his or her craft requiring a devotion that goes well beyond the 9 to 5 with late nights at home programming for fun or beta testing some new piece of software (WoW :)). To be stereotypical of course the answer would always be the same: programmers would be small and meek, passive but insanely brilliant with sharp eyes and glasses; almost exclusively male. Unix admins would be the same only heavyset and bearded. Hygiene would run the gamut from poor to brushes teeth in morning.
File Not Found
I've know guys who kept a toothbrush at the office and brushed after lunch. (Momma's boy.)
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If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
Sunrise Wallpaper Project | The StartPage Randomizer | A Random Web Page
Miszou wrote:
If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
More specifically: Unix man implies: hasBeard && (isOverweight || isWearing(blackHeavyMetalLogoTshirt) || isWearing(blackHeavyMetalPlatformBootsThatLookSomewhatLesbian)) And I'd be tempted to say that VB man implies that the programmer hasn't stopped wearing a nappy, but that'd be unfair ;)
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If you were to describe a 'typical' programmer of a certain language, what would they look like? (Please don't just say, 'me.') Would they have thick glasses? Dead plants in their cubicle? The hippest/newest mp3 player? Nervous when anyone walks by? Constantly confident even under pressure? Are their pants falling down? How much coffee/Mt. Dew/Red Bull have they consumed in the day? Feel free to also describe DBAs, techs, etc. I'm trying to write a funny short on how to find and identify programmers in the wild of offices.
_________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.
...what? No RPG programmers? CLP? ...CLLE? ...REXX/400?? Are we a dying breed...? :(( RPG(IV or ILE, not III or prior): Demeanor: Suave, yet a little strange. Very odd sense of humor--primarily consisting of bad puns. Appears excited when a fellow punster challenges wit. Appearance: Not balding, but not far from it. Appears stressed constantly. Coffee is present, possibly with coffee maker on desk. Cup is cleaned every other Friday...maybe. Cheezit consumption from 10:00-10:15 am. Often forages for chocolates or other goodies. :cool: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Information Systems - Programmer / Network Administrator IBM AS/400: ILE RPG IV, CL, SQL/400, REXX/400 PC: Visual Basic, T-SQL, Microsoft Access Internet: HTML, ASP, ADO, JavaScript, VBScript, CSS, AJAX)
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lol, Suspenders are very different in English from what they are in American ;-) Russell
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lol, Suspenders are very different in English from what they are in American ;-) Russell
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Chris Maunder wrote:
Precious == a little high maintenance, a little delicate sometimes.
Ahh... I see. Here, Strawberry Shortcake[^] is precious.
-- Russell Morris Morbo: "WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!"
OMG what an awesome web site! It's so well-designed ;P
"Quality Software since 1983!"
http://www.smoothjazzy.com/ - see the "Programming" section for freeware tools and articles. -
I've know guys who kept a toothbrush at the office and brushed after lunch. (Momma's boy.)
I only do that because my teeth aren't straight and I get things stuck in them, and nobody ever tells me about it!
"Quality Software since 1983!"
http://www.smoothjazzy.com/ - see the "Programming" section for freeware tools and articles. -
...what? No RPG programmers? CLP? ...CLLE? ...REXX/400?? Are we a dying breed...? :(( RPG(IV or ILE, not III or prior): Demeanor: Suave, yet a little strange. Very odd sense of humor--primarily consisting of bad puns. Appears excited when a fellow punster challenges wit. Appearance: Not balding, but not far from it. Appears stressed constantly. Coffee is present, possibly with coffee maker on desk. Cup is cleaned every other Friday...maybe. Cheezit consumption from 10:00-10:15 am. Often forages for chocolates or other goodies. :cool: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Information Systems - Programmer / Network Administrator IBM AS/400: ILE RPG IV, CL, SQL/400, REXX/400 PC: Visual Basic, T-SQL, Microsoft Access Internet: HTML, ASP, ADO, JavaScript, VBScript, CSS, AJAX)
Koohiisan99 wrote:
Cheezit consumption from 10:00-10:15 am.
haha... this was my habit for awhile, although it'd be more like 10:00 - 11:00.
This statement was never false.
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Braces hold up men's trousers. Suspenders hold up ladies' stockings. Men wearing suspenders in the UK is reserved for high court judges and Conservative politicians. Personally, I blame the private schools.
How in the world did that get messed with when the US's English went on it's own evolutionary path?
CleaKO
"I think you'll be okay here, they have a thin candy shell. 'Surprised you didn't know that." - Tommy Boy
"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!" - Frank the Tank (Old School) -
If you work with Unix, it is essential to have a beard and be overweight by at least 40 lbs.
Sunrise Wallpaper Project | The StartPage Randomizer | A Random Web Page
I would also add Granola Crunchy aka "hippie" cum unkempt yuppie :laugh:
The reason why a poor man will always be poor and the rich man will always be rich, is because the poor man will always maximize his expenditures and the rich man will always maximize his potential. --T.Parker
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C++: Thin and wiry, a patchwork of pale skin, odd scars, and wind burn. They appear clumsy, until suddenly they turn on you. VB: Remember the "O face" guy from Office Space? Like that. C#: Kinda pudgy. But cheerful. Java: Despite their weasel-like appearance and demeanor, these programmers are kind, generous folk at heart. Web: Functioning alcoholics. SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
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...the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more...
Shog9 wrote:
SQL: Malfunctioning alcoholics.
:laugh: