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  3. How to forget

How to forget

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  • K khan

    How do you forget someone? I mean how do you get over a relationship that failed? I need help here, and I can't talk to friends about it. I used to know her years ago, but now I have learnt that she left last year. I even disconnected myself from old friends because they would remind me of her. I just wanted it to be over, but now the memories have come back. I need to get over it before I do something stupid. (I don't know if I can get any more stupid than looking for love in the wrong people). I really want myself to be glad it is over, but how? (It was an abusive relationship for me that started in 1999 that I ended around mid 2003, four years ago!) Please make some suggestions / words of wisdom.

    this is this.

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    DavidNohejl
    wrote on last edited by
    #37

    UT/Quake/other violent games that takes lot of focus, works good in short term. :) In long term, I am affraid *I* can't help you :(


    [My Blog] "Throughout human history, we have been dependent on machines to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony. " - Morpheus "Real men use mspaint for writing code and notepad for designing graphics." - Anna-Jayne Metcalfe

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    • D DavidNohejl

      UT/Quake/other violent games that takes lot of focus, works good in short term. :) In long term, I am affraid *I* can't help you :(


      [My Blog] "Throughout human history, we have been dependent on machines to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony. " - Morpheus "Real men use mspaint for writing code and notepad for designing graphics." - Anna-Jayne Metcalfe

      K Offline
      K Offline
      khan
      wrote on last edited by
      #38

      dnh wrote:

      games that takes lot of focus, works good in short term

      Been there. Done that. How long can one play games? five hours? and after that, lying in bed to sleep takes a lot longer (at least for me). Better do some workout. I also plan to write a few hundred pages on a blog and make it public.

      this is this.

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      • L leppie

        Find someone else, that are interested in what you do and say.

        **

        xacc.ide-0.2.0.77 - now with C# 3.5 support and Navigation Bar!^
        New xacc.ide release RSS feed^

        **

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        Vasudevan Deepak Kumar
        wrote on last edited by
        #39

        :)

        Vasudevan Deepak Kumar Personal Homepage Tech Gossips

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        • H hairy_hats

          khan++ wrote:

          I mean how do you get over a relationship that failed?

          Be patient.  Time is a great healer.  You'll feel bad for a while but it will pass.  Distract yourself until then, do new things, take up new hobbies, write an article for CP.

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          Vasudevan Deepak Kumar
          wrote on last edited by
          #40

          Steve_Harris wrote:

          Time is a great healer.

          Absolutely true. This is a time-proof statement in all cases eternally. :)

          Vasudevan Deepak Kumar Personal Homepage Tech Gossips

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          • T Tamimi Code

            Colin Angus Mackay wrote:

            Learn the lesson and move on.

            it's sometime so costly........ so many tears

            When you get mad...THINK twice that the only advice Tamimi - Code

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            Vasudevan Deepak Kumar
            wrote on last edited by
            #41

            Tamimi - Code wrote:

            it's sometime so costly........ so many tears

            Not just tears. But many heartburns too. Painful process.

            Vasudevan Deepak Kumar Personal Homepage Tech Gossips

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            • Y Yulianto

              The more you want to forget her, the more you can't forget her. From my experience:), just find another girl or get busy.


              Work hard, Work effectively. Stock Pick

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              J Offline
              jcdevnet
              wrote on last edited by
              #42

              Or get busy with another girl!!!! lol :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

              Greets! Joel

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              • K khan

                How do you forget someone? I mean how do you get over a relationship that failed? I need help here, and I can't talk to friends about it. I used to know her years ago, but now I have learnt that she left last year. I even disconnected myself from old friends because they would remind me of her. I just wanted it to be over, but now the memories have come back. I need to get over it before I do something stupid. (I don't know if I can get any more stupid than looking for love in the wrong people). I really want myself to be glad it is over, but how? (It was an abusive relationship for me that started in 1999 that I ended around mid 2003, four years ago!) Please make some suggestions / words of wisdom.

                this is this.

                V Offline
                V Offline
                Vasudevan Deepak Kumar
                wrote on last edited by
                #43

                To ignore is the best way since it would not create any heartburns. I don't know what is the reason that is causing '1' votes for that. Any 'Univoter' syndrome?

                Vasudevan Deepak Kumar Personal Homepage Tech Gossips

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                • D Daniel Turini

                  Buy a XBOX 360 and go play on XBOX Live. It's easy to forget everything there :)

                  I see dead pixels Yes, even I am blogging now!

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                  J Offline
                  jcdevnet
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #44

                  Very true, I met someone who even forgot he had a life ... well at least now he has a live account :laugh::laugh::laugh:

                  Greets! Joel

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                  • K khan

                    ednrgc wrote:

                    Don't continue to beat yourself up over the fact that he's doing things to her that you couldn't.

                    I remind myself that I was the one who ended it. And I never thought of doing nasty things to her. I thought it was sacred. I don't think about what she may be doing with her new partner. It was a choice she made. She used me when she could, but stayed with her other friends. So I quit.

                    this is this.

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                    J Offline
                    jcdevnet
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #45

                    Well the obvious answer just get over it, nobody really dies from love, and forget that there is only one in the world for you, because it isn't true, my advice: Find friends, real friends, do stuff, don't talk about her, don't be afraid to talk to other women, not for sex or for a serious relation, just to have as friends, women friends that'll get your self steem rolling on the way up because it seems like you have it down right now. Too bad you looked at it as something sacred, sex is sex you can put emotion to it or you can choose to do it nasty, whatever gets your boys rolling. Still in the end try not to be alone, surround yourself of happy people. Also the games thing its not so bad just as long as you have someone to play with and you don't feel alone.

                    Greets! Joel

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                    • C Colin Angus Mackay

                      khan++ wrote:

                      (It was an abusive relationship for me that started in 1999 that I ended around mid 2003, four years ago!)

                      Wow! That sounds familiar. My ex was a psycotic b*tch. I won't forget her, I just refer to her as Lady Voldemort or She-who-must-not-be-named. I tell people about her. About how she smashed the car in to the neighbour's house, how she insulted one of my friends so badly I've not spoken to him in 6 years, how she insulted my uncle that I've not spoken with him in about 6 years also. Due to her my dad refused to visit for about 6 months. And during that relationship I ended up in accident and emergency more times that the rest of my life put together. (And there is more to that than I really want to talk about)

                      khan++ wrote:

                      How do you forget someone?

                      You don't

                      khan++ wrote:

                      I mean how do you get over a relationship that failed?

                      Learn the lesson and move on.


                      Upcoming events: * Glasgow: Mock Objects, SQL Server CLR Integration, Reporting Services, db4o, Dependency Injection with Spring ... "I wouldn't say boo to a goose. I'm not a coward, I just realise that it would be largely pointless." My website

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                      Vikram A Punathambekar
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #46

                      Colin Angus Mackay wrote:

                      Wow! That sounds familiar. My ex was a psycotic b*tch. I won't forget her, I just refer to her as Lady Voldemort or She-who-must-not-be-named. I tell people about her. About how she smashed the car in to the neighbour's house, how she insulted one of my friends so badly I've not spoken to him in 6 years, how she insulted my uncle that I've not spoken with him in about 6 years also. Due to her my dad refused to visit for about 6 months. And during that relationship I ended up in accident and emergency more times that the rest of my life put together. (And there is more to that than I really want to talk about)

                      Wow! :omg: Just curious (feel free to tell me to sod off) but how long were you with her?

                      Cheers, Vıkram.


                      After all is said and done, much is said and little is done.

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                      • V Vikram A Punathambekar

                        Colin Angus Mackay wrote:

                        Wow! That sounds familiar. My ex was a psycotic b*tch. I won't forget her, I just refer to her as Lady Voldemort or She-who-must-not-be-named. I tell people about her. About how she smashed the car in to the neighbour's house, how she insulted one of my friends so badly I've not spoken to him in 6 years, how she insulted my uncle that I've not spoken with him in about 6 years also. Due to her my dad refused to visit for about 6 months. And during that relationship I ended up in accident and emergency more times that the rest of my life put together. (And there is more to that than I really want to talk about)

                        Wow! :omg: Just curious (feel free to tell me to sod off) but how long were you with her?

                        Cheers, Vıkram.


                        After all is said and done, much is said and little is done.

                        C Offline
                        C Offline
                        Colin Angus Mackay
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #47

                        Vikram A Punathambekar wrote:

                        how long were you with her?

                        Too long.


                        Upcoming events: * Glasgow: Mock Objects, SQL Server CLR Integration, Reporting Services, db4o, Dependency Injection with Spring ... "I wouldn't say boo to a goose. I'm not a coward, I just realise that it would be largely pointless." My website

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                        • C Colin Angus Mackay

                          Vikram A Punathambekar wrote:

                          how long were you with her?

                          Too long.


                          Upcoming events: * Glasgow: Mock Objects, SQL Server CLR Integration, Reporting Services, db4o, Dependency Injection with Spring ... "I wouldn't say boo to a goose. I'm not a coward, I just realise that it would be largely pointless." My website

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                          Vikram A Punathambekar
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #48

                          :doh:

                          Cheers, Vıkram.


                          After all is said and done, much is said and little is done.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • C Colin Angus Mackay

                            khan++ wrote:

                            (It was an abusive relationship for me that started in 1999 that I ended around mid 2003, four years ago!)

                            Wow! That sounds familiar. My ex was a psycotic b*tch. I won't forget her, I just refer to her as Lady Voldemort or She-who-must-not-be-named. I tell people about her. About how she smashed the car in to the neighbour's house, how she insulted one of my friends so badly I've not spoken to him in 6 years, how she insulted my uncle that I've not spoken with him in about 6 years also. Due to her my dad refused to visit for about 6 months. And during that relationship I ended up in accident and emergency more times that the rest of my life put together. (And there is more to that than I really want to talk about)

                            khan++ wrote:

                            How do you forget someone?

                            You don't

                            khan++ wrote:

                            I mean how do you get over a relationship that failed?

                            Learn the lesson and move on.


                            Upcoming events: * Glasgow: Mock Objects, SQL Server CLR Integration, Reporting Services, db4o, Dependency Injection with Spring ... "I wouldn't say boo to a goose. I'm not a coward, I just realise that it would be largely pointless." My website

                            P Offline
                            P Offline
                            Pierre Leclercq
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #49

                            Colin Angus Mackay wrote:

                            She-who-must-not-be-named

                            :) :)

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                            • K khan

                              Tamimi - Code wrote:

                              Don't blame your self about something you don't have a choice with it

                              Yes, I have only myself to blame. I had the choice to get into a relationship or not. I chose to. I trusted the wrong people.

                              this is this.

                              P Offline
                              P Offline
                              Pierre Leclercq
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #50

                              khan++ wrote:

                              I trusted the wrong people

                              Yep, but you have to trust first to find out whether or not it's a good idea...

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