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  4. Some Innocent Humor (Work friendly)

Some Innocent Humor (Work friendly)

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  • A Adnan Siddiqi

    maybe with HCL, who knows doctor! *grin*

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    soap brain
    wrote on last edited by
    #36

    HCl? What, hydrochloric acid? :confused: What do you mean...? :suss:

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    • P pimpdog 0

      Q: What do you ask a man who's just converted to Islam? A: Have you started beating your wife? Q How many Muslims does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they prefer to sit in the dark and blame it on the Jews. Q: How do you get a Muslim woman pregnant? A: Dress her up as a goat. Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics? A:Neither did I. Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A. What's toilet paper? Q How can you recognise a well-balanced Muslim? A He's got chips on both shoulders. Q: What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? A: Nothing! You told her twice already! Q: What do you call a first-time offender in Saudi Arabia? A: Lefty! Q: What's the difference between Dar al-Islam and a pot of bio-yogurt? A: The yogurt has a living culture. Q: What do you call a drunk Muslim? A: Hamed. Q: What do you call a very drunk Muslim? A: Mohammed.

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      John Carson
      wrote on last edited by
      #37

      John C. Smith wrote:

      Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics? A:Neither did I.

      This is no Nobel Prize for mathematics bird brain.

      John Carson

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      • J John Carson

        John C. Smith wrote:

        Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics? A:Neither did I.

        This is no Nobel Prize for mathematics bird brain.

        John Carson

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        soap brain
        wrote on last edited by
        #38

        Which is exactly why you've never heard about it, I guess. ;P

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        • P pimpdog 0

          It hurts your naive little brain, but what I said was deeply thoughtful. There are a ton of variables I need to emulate the universe in my head. Its something you can't do thats why you don't understand.

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          Oakman
          wrote on last edited by
          #39

          So how's the please don't delete me thing working out for you?

          Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

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          • I Ilion

            Trollslayer wrote:

            That isn't humour - it is hate.

            Grow up, get a life, get real ... or go bother people who care about your prissy leftish "conscience."

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            Oakman
            wrote on last edited by
            #40

            Ilíon wrote:

            or go bother people who care about your prissy leftish "conscience."

            So are you saying that only non-Christians have a conscience or just that you personally don't have one?

            Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

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            • R R Giskard Reventlov

              Where is this any worse than Irish jokes or Essex girl jokes or some of the bile filled anti-semitic jokes that go round? I realise muslims have a hard time laughing at themselves but that doesn't mean that we can't laugh at them. Besides, get a life: who died and made you god?

              me, me, me

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              Adnan Siddiqi
              wrote on last edited by
              #41

              digital man wrote:

              we can't laugh at them.

              but you are not willing to give same liberty to those who have fun of holocaust drama and antisemite thing. You missed the point son or you ain't willing to accept (the reality).

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              • P pimpdog 0

                Q: What do you ask a man who's just converted to Islam? A: Have you started beating your wife? Q How many Muslims does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they prefer to sit in the dark and blame it on the Jews. Q: How do you get a Muslim woman pregnant? A: Dress her up as a goat. Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics? A:Neither did I. Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A. What's toilet paper? Q How can you recognise a well-balanced Muslim? A He's got chips on both shoulders. Q: What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? A: Nothing! You told her twice already! Q: What do you call a first-time offender in Saudi Arabia? A: Lefty! Q: What's the difference between Dar al-Islam and a pot of bio-yogurt? A: The yogurt has a living culture. Q: What do you call a drunk Muslim? A: Hamed. Q: What do you call a very drunk Muslim? A: Mohammed.

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                Adnan Siddiqi
                wrote on last edited by
                #42

                John C. Smith wrote:

                Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics?

                Well Muslims mathematicians had invented something[^]when you guys were living in dark ages. What's the worth of such prize which could be nominated to war mongers as well?[^]

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                • A Adnan Siddiqi

                  digital man wrote:

                  we can't laugh at them.

                  but you are not willing to give same liberty to those who have fun of holocaust drama and antisemite thing. You missed the point son or you ain't willing to accept (the reality).

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                  R Giskard Reventlov
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #43

                  Not at all: there is a difference between saying: kill all jews and jews are horrid, etc and saying "How many jews does it take to fix a lightbulb?" answer: "None, they pay someone else to do it." Okay, maybe not very funny but you get the point?

                  me, me, me

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                  • P pimpdog 0

                    Q: What do you ask a man who's just converted to Islam? A: Have you started beating your wife? Q How many Muslims does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they prefer to sit in the dark and blame it on the Jews. Q: How do you get a Muslim woman pregnant? A: Dress her up as a goat. Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics? A:Neither did I. Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A. What's toilet paper? Q How can you recognise a well-balanced Muslim? A He's got chips on both shoulders. Q: What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? A: Nothing! You told her twice already! Q: What do you call a first-time offender in Saudi Arabia? A: Lefty! Q: What's the difference between Dar al-Islam and a pot of bio-yogurt? A: The yogurt has a living culture. Q: What do you call a drunk Muslim? A: Hamed. Q: What do you call a very drunk Muslim? A: Mohammed.

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                    Diego Moita
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #44

                    Interesting... If Adnan posted this kind of stuff about Jewish people it would be reported as abuse. Where are the "report abuse" people now? The idea seems simple: anti Jewish bigotry is anti-semitism (rightfully so); anti Muslim bigotry is just "refusing multiculturalism that is destroying the heritage of our superior western civilization blah, blah, blah...".


                    Of all forms of sexual aberration, the most unnatural is abstinence.

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                    • D Diego Moita

                      Interesting... If Adnan posted this kind of stuff about Jewish people it would be reported as abuse. Where are the "report abuse" people now? The idea seems simple: anti Jewish bigotry is anti-semitism (rightfully so); anti Muslim bigotry is just "refusing multiculturalism that is destroying the heritage of our superior western civilization blah, blah, blah...".


                      Of all forms of sexual aberration, the most unnatural is abstinence.

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                      Oakman
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #45

                      I reported it. Have you?

                      Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

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                      • D Diego Moita

                        Interesting... If Adnan posted this kind of stuff about Jewish people it would be reported as abuse. Where are the "report abuse" people now? The idea seems simple: anti Jewish bigotry is anti-semitism (rightfully so); anti Muslim bigotry is just "refusing multiculturalism that is destroying the heritage of our superior western civilization blah, blah, blah...".


                        Of all forms of sexual aberration, the most unnatural is abstinence.

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                        Adnan Siddiqi
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #46

                        Diego Moita wrote:

                        The idea seems simple: anti Jewish bigotry is anti-semitism (rightfully so); anti Muslim bigotry is just "refusing multiculturalism that is destroying the heritage of our superior western civilization blah, blah, blah..."

                        and then these guys get mad if God inform us via Quran that Jews can't be friends with Muslims. These guys never tried to "refute" _MUSLIMS God_ at all.

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                        • A Adnan Siddiqi

                          Diego Moita wrote:

                          The idea seems simple: anti Jewish bigotry is anti-semitism (rightfully so); anti Muslim bigotry is just "refusing multiculturalism that is destroying the heritage of our superior western civilization blah, blah, blah..."

                          and then these guys get mad if God inform us via Quran that Jews can't be friends with Muslims. These guys never tried to "refute" _MUSLIMS God_ at all.

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                          Oakman
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #47

                          Adnan Siddiqi wrote:

                          and then these guys get mad if God inform us via Quran that Jews can't be friends with Muslims

                          You want to provide that quote? I'd really like to report you, too. :laugh:

                          Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

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                          • A Adnan Siddiqi

                            thanks for enlightening me your educational and religious background to share innocent jokes. However I would like to answer the following question: Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? They don't "know" because unlike others Muslims use water to clean themselves while others prefer to wipe with paper and keep in pocket or use deodorant instead of taking bath even after months!

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                            Vikram A Punathambekar
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #48

                            Adnan Siddiqi wrote:

                            unlike others Muslims use water to clean themselves

                            Rubbish. Muslims don't have a monopoly on cleaning their behinds with water.

                            Cheers, Vikram.


                            The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray.

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                            • D Diego Moita

                              Interesting... If Adnan posted this kind of stuff about Jewish people it would be reported as abuse. Where are the "report abuse" people now? The idea seems simple: anti Jewish bigotry is anti-semitism (rightfully so); anti Muslim bigotry is just "refusing multiculturalism that is destroying the heritage of our superior western civilization blah, blah, blah...".


                              Of all forms of sexual aberration, the most unnatural is abstinence.

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                              Vikram A Punathambekar
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #49

                              I wanted to reply exactly this to Merrens, but I thought what's the bloody point.

                              Cheers, Vikram.


                              The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray.

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                              • L Lost User

                                You bastard - it's obvious your life is based on hate :mad:

                                Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

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                                pimpdog 0
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #50

                                Why don't you go talk about it to your islamic friends?

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                                • A Adnan Siddiqi

                                  John C. Smith wrote:

                                  Q: Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics?

                                  Well Muslims mathematicians had invented something[^]when you guys were living in dark ages. What's the worth of such prize which could be nominated to war mongers as well?[^]

                                  P Offline
                                  P Offline
                                  pimpdog 0
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #51

                                  I can tell just by looking at the guy he is not something I care to read about.

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                                  • V Vikram A Punathambekar

                                    I wanted to reply exactly this to Merrens, but I thought what's the bloody point.

                                    Cheers, Vikram.


                                    The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray.

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                                    R Giskard Reventlov
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #52

                                    See my previous post viz-a-viz the difference between jokes and outright racism: there is a difference. Besides, I've never reported anyone for anti-semtic abuse and never will and ecratinyl wouldn't report anyone for telling a jewish joke unless it wasn't funny: I just tell em what dicks they are just as Adnann and his chums are free to do with me. You all need to get a sense of humour and a sense of proportion.

                                    me, me, me

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                                    • L Lost User

                                      John C. Smith wrote:

                                      Its all natural and ecosystem friendly.

                                      Right, so its the same as yogurt with a 10% dickhead tax :)

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                                      Christian Graus
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #53

                                      ROTFL - only 10% Yoghurt in the US is just a milky pudding.

                                      Christian Graus Please read this if you don't understand the answer I've given you "also I don't think "TranslateOneToTwoBillion OneHundredAndFortySevenMillion FourHundredAndEightyThreeThousand SixHundredAndFortySeven()" is a very good choice for a function name" - SpacixOne ( offering help to someone who really needed it ) ( spaces added for the benefit of people running at < 1280x1024 )

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                                      • R R Giskard Reventlov

                                        Not at all: there is a difference between saying: kill all jews and jews are horrid, etc and saying "How many jews does it take to fix a lightbulb?" answer: "None, they pay someone else to do it." Okay, maybe not very funny but you get the point?

                                        me, me, me

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                                        leckey 0
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #54

                                        Okay, even I laughed at that!

                                        Shhhhh..... http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                                        • O Oakman

                                          Adnan Siddiqi wrote:

                                          and then these guys get mad if God inform us via Quran that Jews can't be friends with Muslims

                                          You want to provide that quote? I'd really like to report you, too. :laugh:

                                          Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

                                          A Offline
                                          A Offline
                                          Adnan Siddiqi
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #55

                                          like you reported about entire BIBLE and declared it abuse for the society who later invented thing liek Secularism and Sepration of State and Church?

                                          O 1 Reply Last reply
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