Top 10 sings you are a Fundamentalist Christian
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Oakman wrote:
For you?
yep.
Oakman wrote:
For me? Not so much.
now that is sad.
Mike - typical white guy. The USA does have universal healthcare, but you have to pay for it. D'oh. Thomas Mann - "Tolerance becomes a crime when applied to evil." The NYT - my leftist brochure. Calling an illegal alien an “undocumented immigrant” is like calling a drug dealer an “unlicensed pharmacist”. God doesn't believe in atheists, therefore they don't exist.
Mike Gaskey wrote:
yep.
Now, that is sad.
Mike Gaskey wrote:
now that is sad.
For me? Not so much. Big world, innit?
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Mike Gaskey wrote:
yep.
Now, that is sad.
Mike Gaskey wrote:
now that is sad.
For me? Not so much. Big world, innit?
Vincent Reynolds wrote:
Big world, innit?
and obviously accommodates all types.
Mike - typical white guy. The USA does have universal healthcare, but you have to pay for it. D'oh. Thomas Mann - "Tolerance becomes a crime when applied to evil." The NYT - my leftist brochure. Calling an illegal alien an “undocumented immigrant” is like calling a drug dealer an “unlicensed pharmacist”. God doesn't believe in atheists, therefore they don't exist.
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10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours. 9 - You feel insulted and 'dehumanized' when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt. 8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God. 7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the 'atrocities' attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in 'Exodus' and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in 'Joshua' including women, children, and trees! 6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky. 5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old. 4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most 'tolerant' and 'loving.' 3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in 'tongues' may be all the evidence you need to 'prove' Christianity. 2 - You define 0.01% as a 'high success rate' when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God. 1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
I didn't get any requirements for the signature
ToddHileHoffer wrote:
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
I've found the same applicable to many fundamentalists about their own books.
Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.
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THIS is the way and the truth: Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster[^] Everything else is patently nonsense.
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Oakman wrote:
For you?
yep.
Oakman wrote:
For me? Not so much.
now that is sad.
Mike - typical white guy. The USA does have universal healthcare, but you have to pay for it. D'oh. Thomas Mann - "Tolerance becomes a crime when applied to evil." The NYT - my leftist brochure. Calling an illegal alien an “undocumented immigrant” is like calling a drug dealer an “unlicensed pharmacist”. God doesn't believe in atheists, therefore they don't exist.
Mike Gaskey wrote:
yep.
That's great!
Mike Gaskey wrote:
now that is sad.
Once upon a time (when I was young and green behind the ears) I was a lay preacher in the Methodist Church, so you can't say it's for lack of looking. But I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do. Indeed, I have this sneaking suspicion that whether it's a backwoods fundie like Illion or the Pope in his golden throne, when they start telling me that God shared the secret of what to do and what not to do with them, it's all about them, not about God.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
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Mike Gaskey wrote:
yep.
That's great!
Mike Gaskey wrote:
now that is sad.
Once upon a time (when I was young and green behind the ears) I was a lay preacher in the Methodist Church, so you can't say it's for lack of looking. But I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do. Indeed, I have this sneaking suspicion that whether it's a backwoods fundie like Illion or the Pope in his golden throne, when they start telling me that God shared the secret of what to do and what not to do with them, it's all about them, not about God.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
Oakman wrote:
I was a lay preacher in the Methodist Church, so you can't say it's for lack of looking. But I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do.
i went to catholic school (and i grew up on a farm...im so typical) i have to agree. what i really found is the deeper and more involved one got with a certain denomination the more and more you have to deny all other possibilities so you can climb deeper into the well. it is a very "us" versus "them" mentality.
----------------------------------------------------------- "When I first saw it, I just thought that you really, really enjoyed programming in java." - Leslie Sanford
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Oakman wrote:
I was a lay preacher in the Methodist Church, so you can't say it's for lack of looking. But I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do.
i went to catholic school (and i grew up on a farm...im so typical) i have to agree. what i really found is the deeper and more involved one got with a certain denomination the more and more you have to deny all other possibilities so you can climb deeper into the well. it is a very "us" versus "them" mentality.
----------------------------------------------------------- "When I first saw it, I just thought that you really, really enjoyed programming in java." - Leslie Sanford
jgasm wrote:
it is a very "us" versus "them" mentality.
What's really evil fun is to pretend that you think the DaVinci Code is factual. You become such a 'them,' you can't get back to 'us' for months.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
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Mike Gaskey wrote:
yep.
That's great!
Mike Gaskey wrote:
now that is sad.
Once upon a time (when I was young and green behind the ears) I was a lay preacher in the Methodist Church, so you can't say it's for lack of looking. But I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do. Indeed, I have this sneaking suspicion that whether it's a backwoods fundie like Illion or the Pope in his golden throne, when they start telling me that God shared the secret of what to do and what not to do with them, it's all about them, not about God.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
Oakman wrote:
I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do. Indeed, I have this sneaking suspicion that whether it's a backwoods fundie like Illion or the Pope in his golden throne, when they start telling me that God shared the secret of what to do and what not to do with them, it's all about them, not about God.
I agree.
"The clue train passed his station without stopping." - John Simmons / outlaw programmer "Real programmers just throw a bunch of 1s and 0s at the computer to see what sticks" - Pete O'Hanlon
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jgasm wrote:
it is a very "us" versus "them" mentality.
What's really evil fun is to pretend that you think the DaVinci Code is factual. You become such a 'them,' you can't get back to 'us' for months.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
Oakman wrote:
think the DaVinci Code is factual
How about the Bible Code? I am not sure about it since many of the things mentioned are after the fact and I have yet to see any of the "future" stuff happen :suss:
"The clue train passed his station without stopping." - John Simmons / outlaw programmer "Real programmers just throw a bunch of 1s and 0s at the computer to see what sticks" - Pete O'Hanlon
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Mike Mullikin wrote:
Wouldn't that be insulting to the "bitch" and thus insult your delicate humor sensibilities
Not if it were worn by a woman. ;) I must admit I am much more likely to peruse t-shirts worn by women. :-O
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
I fail to see how calling someone "the bitch" is not insulting? I do however, think the shirt is funny.
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Mike Gaskey wrote:
yep.
That's great!
Mike Gaskey wrote:
now that is sad.
Once upon a time (when I was young and green behind the ears) I was a lay preacher in the Methodist Church, so you can't say it's for lack of looking. But I have yet to see evidence that God, omnipotent, omniscient, and everlasting would really care about whether I ate fish on Friday, or made love to a woman outside of marriage, or didn't give ten percent of my gross income to the local priests, or - most importantly - that any other man on earth has been empowered to tell me what God wants me to do. Indeed, I have this sneaking suspicion that whether it's a backwoods fundie like Illion or the Pope in his golden throne, when they start telling me that God shared the secret of what to do and what not to do with them, it's all about them, not about God.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
Oakman wrote:
when I was young and green behind the ears
I think you mean when you were either green or wet behind the ears ;)
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I fail to see how calling someone "the bitch" is not insulting? I do however, think the shirt is funny.
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Oakman wrote:
think the DaVinci Code is factual
How about the Bible Code? I am not sure about it since many of the things mentioned are after the fact and I have yet to see any of the "future" stuff happen :suss:
"The clue train passed his station without stopping." - John Simmons / outlaw programmer "Real programmers just throw a bunch of 1s and 0s at the computer to see what sticks" - Pete O'Hanlon
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Oakman wrote:
when I was young and green behind the ears
I think you mean when you were either green or wet behind the ears ;)
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eggsovereasy wrote:
I fail to see how calling someone "the bitch" is not insulting?
Suppose the bitch's name is Rover or Spot?
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
Fair enough.
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Vincent Reynolds wrote:
Big world, innit?
and obviously accommodates all types.
Mike - typical white guy. The USA does have universal healthcare, but you have to pay for it. D'oh. Thomas Mann - "Tolerance becomes a crime when applied to evil." The NYT - my leftist brochure. Calling an illegal alien an “undocumented immigrant” is like calling a drug dealer an “unlicensed pharmacist”. God doesn't believe in atheists, therefore they don't exist.
Mike Gaskey wrote:
and obviously accommodates all types.
Are you accusing the world of being tolerant? :)
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10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours. 9 - You feel insulted and 'dehumanized' when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt. 8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God. 7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the 'atrocities' attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in 'Exodus' and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in 'Joshua' including women, children, and trees! 6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky. 5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old. 4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most 'tolerant' and 'loving.' 3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in 'tongues' may be all the evidence you need to 'prove' Christianity. 2 - You define 0.01% as a 'high success rate' when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God. 1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
I didn't get any requirements for the signature
Excellent.
John Carson
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Boy, you sure did beat the shit out of that strawman pretty good! Some Christians have some of those characteristics, but some have none.
Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface
Oakman wrote:
Boy, you sure did beat the sh*t out of that strawman pretty good! Some Christians have some of those characteristics, but some have none.
The title of the post does refer to Fundamentalist Christians, not Christians in general.
John Carson
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Oakman wrote:
Boy, you sure did beat the sh*t out of that strawman pretty good! Some Christians have some of those characteristics, but some have none.
The title of the post does refer to Fundamentalist Christians, not Christians in general.
John Carson