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  4. Where's Adnan?

Where's Adnan?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Back Room
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  • L Lost User

    When there are issues like this?[^] BTW, men are sometimes forced into marriges as well.

    Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

    J Offline
    J Offline
    JimmyRopes
    wrote on last edited by
    #3

    Trollslayer wrote:

    BTW, men are sometimes forced into marriges as well.

    In the US it is called a "shotgun wedding". :~ Picture girl gets pregnant, father gets shotgun, and nuptials follow shortly thereafter. :-D

    Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
    Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
    I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

    L 1 Reply Last reply
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    • J JimmyRopes

      Trollslayer wrote:

      BTW, men are sometimes forced into marriges as well.

      In the US it is called a "shotgun wedding". :~ Picture girl gets pregnant, father gets shotgun, and nuptials follow shortly thereafter. :-D

      Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
      Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
      I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #4

      I mean arranged marriges with someone they've never met.

      Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

      J 1 Reply Last reply
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      • L Lost User

        I mean arranged marriges with someone they've never met.

        Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

        J Offline
        J Offline
        JimmyRopes
        wrote on last edited by
        #5

        Trollslayer wrote:

        I mean arranged marriges with someone they've never met.

        A shotgun wedding is an arranged marriage, sometimes with a girl the man only met once. :sigh: PS - I know what you meant. :-D

        Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
        Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
        I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

        O 1 Reply Last reply
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        • N Nish Nishant

          This particular incident happened in Bangladesh, but I am sure incidents like this are very frequent amongst Muslim families in Pakistan and India too. I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate. Her parents threatened to kill the lad, threatened that they'd suicide, confiscated her cell phone and driving license, and even locked her up in a room when she tried to argue with them. Eventually she succumbed and was forced to marry a Muslim lad of her parents' choice. A tragedy really! :sigh:

          Regards, Nish


          Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
          My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

          J Offline
          J Offline
          jith iii
          wrote on last edited by
          #6

          Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

          I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate

          This could happen in any religion in India. One of my friend had the same experience. The joke is,both he and his love interest were Hindus but different caste.

          Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

          A tragedy really! Sigh

          Debatable,in indian situation :)

          N 1 Reply Last reply
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          • J jith iii

            Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

            I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate

            This could happen in any religion in India. One of my friend had the same experience. The joke is,both he and his love interest were Hindus but different caste.

            Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

            A tragedy really! Sigh

            Debatable,in indian situation :)

            N Offline
            N Offline
            Nish Nishant
            wrote on last edited by
            #7

            jith - iii wrote:

            This could happen in any religion in India.

            Agree - parentally arranged marriages (against their children's wishes) happens in all Indian communities/states. Though my personal observation has been that Muslim parents are stricter about this compared to Christian/Hindu parents.

            jith - iii wrote:

            Debatable,in indian situation

            I wouldn't say that. Forcing someone to marry someone against his or her wish is a tragic thing to happen anywhere in the world - I don't think that having it happen in India makes it any less of a tragedy.

            Regards, Nish


            Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
            My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

            J J 2 Replies Last reply
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            • N Nish Nishant

              This particular incident happened in Bangladesh, but I am sure incidents like this are very frequent amongst Muslim families in Pakistan and India too. I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate. Her parents threatened to kill the lad, threatened that they'd suicide, confiscated her cell phone and driving license, and even locked her up in a room when she tried to argue with them. Eventually she succumbed and was forced to marry a Muslim lad of her parents' choice. A tragedy really! :sigh:

              Regards, Nish


              Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
              My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

              A Offline
              A Offline
              Adnan Siddiqi
              wrote on last edited by
              #8

              Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

              This particular incident happened in Bangladesh, but I am sure incidents like this are very frequent amongst Muslim families in Pakistan and India too.

              one word, Islamphobia.

              N C 2 Replies Last reply
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              • L Lost User

                When there are issues like this?[^] BTW, men are sometimes forced into marriges as well.

                Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

                B Offline
                B Offline
                Bassam Abdul Baki
                wrote on last edited by
                #9

                Trollslayer wrote:

                BTW, men are sometimes forced into marriges as well.

                Women are generally forced into it, but men get forced out of it. ;P

                Web - Blog - RSS - Math - BM

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • L Lost User

                  When there are issues like this?[^] BTW, men are sometimes forced into marriges as well.

                  Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

                  A Offline
                  A Offline
                  Adnan Siddiqi
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #10

                  What's your point?

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • A Adnan Siddiqi

                    Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                    This particular incident happened in Bangladesh, but I am sure incidents like this are very frequent amongst Muslim families in Pakistan and India too.

                    one word, Islamphobia.

                    N Offline
                    N Offline
                    Nish Nishant
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #11

                    Adnan Siddiqi wrote:

                    one word, Islamphobia.

                    What do you have to say about this : "I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate. Her parents threatened to kill the lad, threatened that they'd suicide, confiscated her cell phone and driving license, and even locked her up in a room when she tried to argue with them. Eventually she succumbed and was forced to marry a Muslim lad of her parents' choice." What's Islamophobic about stating an incident that I was personally aware of?

                    Regards, Nish


                    Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
                    My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

                    C J A 3 Replies Last reply
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                    • N Nish Nishant

                      Adnan Siddiqi wrote:

                      one word, Islamphobia.

                      What do you have to say about this : "I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate. Her parents threatened to kill the lad, threatened that they'd suicide, confiscated her cell phone and driving license, and even locked her up in a room when she tried to argue with them. Eventually she succumbed and was forced to marry a Muslim lad of her parents' choice." What's Islamophobic about stating an incident that I was personally aware of?

                      Regards, Nish


                      Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
                      My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

                      C Offline
                      C Offline
                      Christian Graus
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #12

                      Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                      What's Islamophobic about stating an incident that I was personally aware of?

                      Simple, it's a blanket explanation that requires no thought. That appears to be what he specialises in, ways of explaining things that don't require thought, and defy all attempts at intelligent explanation.

                      Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • A Adnan Siddiqi

                        Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                        This particular incident happened in Bangladesh, but I am sure incidents like this are very frequent amongst Muslim families in Pakistan and India too.

                        one word, Islamphobia.

                        C Offline
                        C Offline
                        Christian Graus
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #13

                        Yeah, I can see how girls who are forced into loveless marriages with old men who will beat and rape them, or girls who live in fear of being killed by relatives, would be scared of Islam. This doesn't happen in Christian countries, you know. How do you explain that ? Is it George Bushes fault ?

                        Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

                        J 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • N Nish Nishant

                          jith - iii wrote:

                          This could happen in any religion in India.

                          Agree - parentally arranged marriages (against their children's wishes) happens in all Indian communities/states. Though my personal observation has been that Muslim parents are stricter about this compared to Christian/Hindu parents.

                          jith - iii wrote:

                          Debatable,in indian situation

                          I wouldn't say that. Forcing someone to marry someone against his or her wish is a tragic thing to happen anywhere in the world - I don't think that having it happen in India makes it any less of a tragedy.

                          Regards, Nish


                          Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
                          My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

                          J Offline
                          J Offline
                          jith iii
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #14

                          Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                          Agree - parentally arranged marriages (against their children's wishes) happens in all Indian communities/states. Though my personal observation has been that Muslim parents are stricter about this compared to Christian/Hindu parents.

                          I don't think so. Upper caste Hindus are still strict in these things. Being from a brahmin family, I know very well that I'll be outcasted if I marry a girl not even from a different religion but from the same religion and a different caste. But as you said the social clutch of Hindus amongst people of their soceity is not as strong as Muslims or christains. So even if they have pushed out by their family a hindu can easily live the life according to Hindu traditions. Same is not the case of a muslim or christian. Another thing depends here is education of the parents.

                          Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                          I don't think that having it happen in India makes it any less of a tragedy.

                          If you exclude the cities,the concept here is,parents are living only for their children. No parent will dream about a bad life for their children. If you are living in a society where inter dependency between people are inevitable,inter religious marriages would normally gives no happiness to the couples. And unlike in devolped countries you may not get a second chance if you realize that your choice of partner was wrong. Parents obviously worry about these facts.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • N Nish Nishant

                            jith - iii wrote:

                            This could happen in any religion in India.

                            Agree - parentally arranged marriages (against their children's wishes) happens in all Indian communities/states. Though my personal observation has been that Muslim parents are stricter about this compared to Christian/Hindu parents.

                            jith - iii wrote:

                            Debatable,in indian situation

                            I wouldn't say that. Forcing someone to marry someone against his or her wish is a tragic thing to happen anywhere in the world - I don't think that having it happen in India makes it any less of a tragedy.

                            Regards, Nish


                            Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
                            My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

                            J Offline
                            J Offline
                            JimmyRopes
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #15

                            Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                            I don't think that having it happen in India makes it any less of a tragedy.

                            Unless you're the man. In India they pay you to marry their daughters. The man gets the dowry. :-D

                            Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                            Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
                            I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                            M 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • C Christian Graus

                              Yeah, I can see how girls who are forced into loveless marriages with old men who will beat and rape them, or girls who live in fear of being killed by relatives, would be scared of Islam. This doesn't happen in Christian countries, you know. How do you explain that ? Is it George Bushes fault ?

                              Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

                              J Offline
                              J Offline
                              jith iii
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #16

                              According to an Indian perspective arranged marriages turned out be the better option. The logic here is,parents would have more life experience to select a better partner for their wards. They fear that children's selection would mostly due to mere infatuation and they think they can give a better life partner for their child. The proof what they show here is the less number of divorces.

                              Christian Graus wrote:

                              I can see how girls who are forced into loveless marriages with old men who will beat and rape them, or girls who live in fear of being killed by relatives, would be scared of Islam.

                              If this happens it's only amongst the uneducated.

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                              • N Nish Nishant

                                Adnan Siddiqi wrote:

                                one word, Islamphobia.

                                What do you have to say about this : "I personally know of a Muslim girl (my sister's classmate) who was in a relationship with a Christian classmate. Her parents threatened to kill the lad, threatened that they'd suicide, confiscated her cell phone and driving license, and even locked her up in a room when she tried to argue with them. Eventually she succumbed and was forced to marry a Muslim lad of her parents' choice." What's Islamophobic about stating an incident that I was personally aware of?

                                Regards, Nish


                                Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
                                My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

                                J Offline
                                J Offline
                                jith iii
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #17

                                I understand what you meant. Child marriages and baseless divorces are happening mainly amongst muslims. But protests againsts these are happenening inside islam itself. It's just because of lack of education and muslim community in India is realizing that now and we could see many Islamic youth orgnizations active on various human rights issues in islam. But coming to inter religious marriages,all religion are in the same boat.

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                                • J jith iii

                                  According to an Indian perspective arranged marriages turned out be the better option. The logic here is,parents would have more life experience to select a better partner for their wards. They fear that children's selection would mostly due to mere infatuation and they think they can give a better life partner for their child. The proof what they show here is the less number of divorces.

                                  Christian Graus wrote:

                                  I can see how girls who are forced into loveless marriages with old men who will beat and rape them, or girls who live in fear of being killed by relatives, would be scared of Islam.

                                  If this happens it's only amongst the uneducated.

                                  C Offline
                                  C Offline
                                  Christian Graus
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #18

                                  jith - iii wrote:

                                  The logic here is,parents would have more life experience to select a better partner for their wards.

                                  And that's a pile of BS.

                                  jith - iii wrote:

                                  If this happens it's only amongst the uneducated.

                                  IF this happens ? It plainly happens. What's really needed is for educated Muslims to decry it as much as ignorant ones like Adnan make excuses for it.

                                  Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

                                  J 1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • J jith iii

                                    I understand what you meant. Child marriages and baseless divorces are happening mainly amongst muslims. But protests againsts these are happenening inside islam itself. It's just because of lack of education and muslim community in India is realizing that now and we could see many Islamic youth orgnizations active on various human rights issues in islam. But coming to inter religious marriages,all religion are in the same boat.

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    Christian Graus
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #19

                                    jith - iii wrote:

                                    But coming to inter religious marriages,all religion are in the same boat.

                                    I don't believe that is true.

                                    Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

                                    J 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • J jith iii

                                      According to an Indian perspective arranged marriages turned out be the better option. The logic here is,parents would have more life experience to select a better partner for their wards. They fear that children's selection would mostly due to mere infatuation and they think they can give a better life partner for their child. The proof what they show here is the less number of divorces.

                                      Christian Graus wrote:

                                      I can see how girls who are forced into loveless marriages with old men who will beat and rape them, or girls who live in fear of being killed by relatives, would be scared of Islam.

                                      If this happens it's only amongst the uneducated.

                                      O Offline
                                      O Offline
                                      Oakman
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #20

                                      jith - iii wrote:

                                      The proof what they show here is the less number of divorces.

                                      Fewer divorces mean that the woman isn't working in a job that can support her. and/Or a legal system tilted towards forcing people to stay together.

                                      Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

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                                      • O Oakman

                                        jith - iii wrote:

                                        The proof what they show here is the less number of divorces.

                                        Fewer divorces mean that the woman isn't working in a job that can support her. and/Or a legal system tilted towards forcing people to stay together.

                                        Jon Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

                                        C Offline
                                        C Offline
                                        Christian Graus
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #21

                                        Yes, lack of divorce doesn't prove happiness, especially in an already potentially oppressive environment. It's like the sudden explosion of incest cases reported in the 80s. Sick men didn't suddenly realise they had daughters, society was supportive of those girls and gave them a voice instead of things being kept hidden.

                                        Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

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                                        • C Christian Graus

                                          jith - iii wrote:

                                          But coming to inter religious marriages,all religion are in the same boat.

                                          I don't believe that is true.

                                          Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista.

                                          J Offline
                                          J Offline
                                          jith iii
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #22

                                          Well,In india Christains are normally soft in terms of inter religious marriages. The only condition would be the boy/girl of the other religion needs to be converted into Christianity. If they are not ready,there won't be riots but the church will try to baptist their children. Otherwise, they would be out of church and it's like a big punishment in Christianity where you would not be even allowed to be buried in the church cemetery. Still this is dependent up on the level of influence of the people in the church. In the case of hindu's maximum punishment can be your parents will not accept you afterwards. You would not be allowed in any family functions. It's as if you will not allow your enemy to attend any of your family functions. It's fun you know. :) .Watching the impact an inter caste or religious love marriage makes in the society.

                                          C 2 2 Replies Last reply
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