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This Just In From DirecTV

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  • T ToddHileHoffer

    Just be glad you don't own an xbox 360. I've had two of the die. They make you go through all the same dumb shit. But why did you get all mad at the person on the phone? He's only reading a script. He can't say what he really thinks, he'll probably loose his shitty job. That's person's life already sucks and you're just making worse by acting like a dick.

    I didn't get any requirements for the signature

    realJSOPR Offline
    realJSOPR Offline
    realJSOP
    wrote on last edited by
    #6

    I'm a on-time bill-paying dick, though. I gave the chick fair warning that I'd been hung up on twice before (and had to navigate their insanely annoying voice navigation crap to get back to an agent), and that I simply wanted her to arrange to have the box replaced. When she insisted on going through her script, I had every right to become an assh*le. I was actually doing good until the "power is different" thing... Of course, she couldn't possibly have known that I'd been fighting with WPF all day to begin with...

    "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
    -----
    "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001

    E C J 3 Replies Last reply
    0
    • realJSOPR realJSOP

      So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #7

      Go on - tell me that after you hung up you didn't just try plugging it directly into the wall? Actually, if the wall socket is higher than the surge protector, doesn't the electricity move faster as it's going down hill?

      ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

      D J 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • L Lost User

        Go on - tell me that after you hung up you didn't just try plugging it directly into the wall? Actually, if the wall socket is higher than the surge protector, doesn't the electricity move faster as it's going down hill?

        ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

        D Offline
        D Offline
        Douglas Troy
        wrote on last edited by
        #8

        Maxxx_ wrote:

        doesn't the electricity move faster as it's going down hill?

        Only on the 2nd Tuesday of every other month.


        :..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
        Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTL

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • realJSOPR realJSOP

          So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

          "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

          C Offline
          C Offline
          Charlie Williams
          wrote on last edited by
          #9

          This is a pretty common request from a support tech (one of several variations). They're giving you an opportunity to solve the problem by plugging the darn thing in without feeling like a complete moron for wasting everybody's time. You'd be surprised at how often that's the problem. You just got someone who did know when to move on.


          if(!curlies){ return; }

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • D Douglas Troy

            John, I laughed so hard at this I damn near shed a tear. I've been through this same line of dumbass questioning when dealing with COMCAST cable service when they were doing everything they could to convince me that the problem I had was with the cable in my house. So I unplugged my cable modem, walked outside with an extension cord and wired the damn thing straight to the line coming from the pole just so I could say "no lights you idiot, NOW will you send someone out to check my f***ing service problem!" Then the guy got hung up on how I managed to plug my cable modem in when I was standing outside ... It boggles the mind. But thanks for sharing this, I needed a good laugh.


            :..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
            Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTL

            M Offline
            M Offline
            Marc Clifton
            wrote on last edited by
            #10

            Douglas Troy wrote:

            Then the guy got hung up on how I managed to plug my cable modem in when I was standing outside ...

            I had to read your post at least 3 times, because I sorta got the impression you wired one of the 240 poles into the cable input of the modem so you could be darned sure it was really dead. :) Marc

            Will work for food. Interacx

            D 1 Reply Last reply
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            • realJSOPR realJSOP

              So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

              "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

              N Offline
              N Offline
              NetDave
              wrote on last edited by
              #11

              I've been throught this scenario so many times with the cable modem support monkeys. When they ask me to do something, I just pause a couple of seconds and say, "Ok, it's done", and then we move on to the next item on their script. There's not much point in arguing with the monkeys, they're only doing what they've been trained to do in order to get a piece of banana.

              QRZ? de WAØTTN

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • realJSOPR realJSOP

                So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                M Offline
                M Offline
                Marc Clifton
                wrote on last edited by
                #12

                John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:

                DTV: The power really is different.

                So, just to play devil's advocate because I have nothing better to do than go to bed, there's a teensy-weensy possibility that whoever wrote those idiotic diagnostic steps was thinking of those really super-duper surge protectors that are actually battery backup systems and, not being really totally super-duper, use a power inverter that puts out a square wave instead of a nice clean sine wave. Well, you know. It was just a thought. Marc

                Will work for food. Interacx

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • realJSOPR realJSOP

                  So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                  "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                  B Offline
                  B Offline
                  Bassam Abdul Baki
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #13

                  Can you make all my customer service calls from now on? I see that as a good business for you.

                  Web - Blog - RSS - Math - BM

                  R 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • realJSOPR realJSOP

                    So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                    "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                    B Offline
                    B Offline
                    Bassam Abdul Baki
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #14

                    On the same subject, when my LCD monitor was dying the first time around before the warranty expired, they had me going through hoops to see what the cause was. They asked me to plug it into another power outlet which I wasn't about to do. I said I did anyway. Then they asked me how many colored stripes I see. I said seven for the rainbow. She said yes, that's right, it's almost dead. Woohoo! Lying paid off. They sent me a new one the next day or two.

                    Web - Blog - RSS - Math - BM

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • realJSOPR realJSOP

                      I'm a on-time bill-paying dick, though. I gave the chick fair warning that I'd been hung up on twice before (and had to navigate their insanely annoying voice navigation crap to get back to an agent), and that I simply wanted her to arrange to have the box replaced. When she insisted on going through her script, I had every right to become an assh*le. I was actually doing good until the "power is different" thing... Of course, she couldn't possibly have known that I'd been fighting with WPF all day to begin with...

                      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
                      -----
                      "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001

                      E Offline
                      E Offline
                      Edbert P
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #15

                      John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:

                      Of course, she couldn't possibly have known that I'd been fighting with WPF all day to begin with...

                      Is that equivalent to fighting with Silverlight as well? I have just deployed an app and found so many issues including but not restricted to ComboBox, WCF compression and so on... :( How the hell does Microsoft get by with bugs that are acknowledged and have been around for almost a year?

                      "A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine." - Thomas Jefferson "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin Edbert Sydney, Australia

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • B Bassam Abdul Baki

                        Can you make all my customer service calls from now on? I see that as a good business for you.

                        Web - Blog - RSS - Math - BM

                        R Offline
                        R Offline
                        Roger Wright
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #16

                        :laugh: rent-a-john at your service! :-D

                        "A Journey of a Thousand Rest Stops Begins with a Single Movement"

                        L 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • R Roger Wright

                          :laugh: rent-a-john at your service! :-D

                          "A Journey of a Thousand Rest Stops Begins with a Single Movement"

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #17

                          Roger Wright wrote:

                          rent-a-john at your service!

                          aka porta-loo

                          R 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L Lost User

                            Go on - tell me that after you hung up you didn't just try plugging it directly into the wall? Actually, if the wall socket is higher than the surge protector, doesn't the electricity move faster as it's going down hill?

                            ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                            J Offline
                            J Offline
                            JimmyRopes
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #18

                            You have to remember that it is alternating current. Sometimes it is moving downhill and sometimes uphill. :doh:

                            Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                            Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
                            I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • realJSOPR realJSOP

                              So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                              "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                              J Offline
                              J Offline
                              JimmyRopes
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #19

                              John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:

                              DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall.

                              ME: (not to be confused with the you ME) Hold on I go do that. Gets up to get a drink because it is going to be a trying phone call. Ok it still doesn't work. Send a new box.

                              Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                              Think inside the box! ProActive Secure Systems
                              I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                                "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                                T Offline
                                T Offline
                                Tom Deketelaere
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #20

                                I know the feeling, on average I have to make 2-3 such calls every month. Our digital tv provider sucks (and the router even more), usually I do the same as several people already said. I just sit down in my couch (about 3meters away from the damn box) and tell them 'yes try'd it, still doesn't work'. After their script they then connect you to the 'specialist' who does some stuff at his end (don't know or care what) and all off the sudden my tv works again (I think the company has a problem with cutting people off bye mistake, and yes I pay my bills on time :) ).

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • L Lost User

                                  Roger Wright wrote:

                                  rent-a-john at your service!

                                  aka porta-loo

                                  R Offline
                                  R Offline
                                  Rhys Gravell
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #21

                                  In the nicest possible way, port-a-loon maybe :-)

                                  Rhys "The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it" They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it's not one half so bad as a lot of ignorance." Terry Pratchett

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                                  • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                    So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                                    "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                                    L Offline
                                    L Offline
                                    Lost User
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #22

                                    Let me guess, you can't get Echostar there so they have a monopoly in that area. They probably aren't any better though. :sigh:

                                    Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.

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                                    • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                      I'm a on-time bill-paying dick, though. I gave the chick fair warning that I'd been hung up on twice before (and had to navigate their insanely annoying voice navigation crap to get back to an agent), and that I simply wanted her to arrange to have the box replaced. When she insisted on going through her script, I had every right to become an assh*le. I was actually doing good until the "power is different" thing... Of course, she couldn't possibly have known that I'd been fighting with WPF all day to begin with...

                                      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
                                      -----
                                      "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001

                                      C Offline
                                      C Offline
                                      Caslen
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #23

                                      You don't have a right to be an a$$hole - you're just probably one naturally...

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                                      0
                                      • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                        So, I came home from work to find that we'd lost power. After restting all of the clocks, I went to turn on the TV. Imagine my surprise when I got nothing but a blank (blue) screen. After trying the various things they do to verify that your box is indeed dead (press the rest button, if that doesn't work, unplug it andplug it back in, and if that doesn't work, unplug it, plug it back in and press the power button and the rest button at the same time to bring it out of standby mode), I called them. Twice, I was accidentally hung up on while beginning the diagnostic step. By the 3rd call, I had built up quite a head of steam. In the process of making me do all that diagnostic stuff again, the next part went something like this: DTV: Is your box plugged into a power strip or surge suppressor? ME: Yes. DTV, unplug it and plug it directly into the wall. Me: Exactly what is that going to prove? DTV: The power coming from the wall outlet is different from the power coming from the surge suppressor. Me: You're kidding, right? DTV: No sir, it's different. Me: What retard got you to believe that? DTV: The power is different. Me: I want you to bring a f*cking voltmeter down here and show me how 120v volts comin outa the f*ckin wall is DIFFERENT than the 120 volts comin' outa the power strip. No really, I need you to show me. DTV: The power really is different. Me: Is this the part of your brainless script titled "Now Piss The Customer Off By Making a COMPLETELY Absurd Demand"? DTV: I'm sorry sir, if you're inconvenienced. Me: Tell you what, let's just skip the rest of this bullsh*t so that you have an opportunity to tell me how you're going to fix my problem. DTV: I have to make sure we've tried everything. Me: How about if I try reaching through the goddamn phone so I can ring your neck? DTV: There's no need to talk like that. Me: Yeah, there's a need. You can't tell that I didn't want to spend 30 minutes on the phone with some minimum wage idiot going over absurd diagnostic steps? I want my satellite box replaced because it's BROKEN. The rest of the phone call was spent arranging the replacement. I won't get the replacement until next Tuesday. I wish New Egg sold satellite service. At least I'd get decent service.

                                        "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won

                                        M Offline
                                        M Offline
                                        Member 96
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #24

                                        That's funny, whenever our StarChoice sat receiver goes catywampus and we have to call they always ask that "is it plugged directly in the wall" question. We have it plugged into a very good quality UPS, I always lie and say yes to get to the actual diagnostics part of the call. I think they ask this because a lot of cheap power strips may not provide a proper ground or something.


                                        "Creating your own blog is about as easy as creating your own urine, and you're about as likely to find someone else interested in it." -- Lore Sjöberg

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                                        • M Member 96

                                          That's funny, whenever our StarChoice sat receiver goes catywampus and we have to call they always ask that "is it plugged directly in the wall" question. We have it plugged into a very good quality UPS, I always lie and say yes to get to the actual diagnostics part of the call. I think they ask this because a lot of cheap power strips may not provide a proper ground or something.


                                          "Creating your own blog is about as easy as creating your own urine, and you're about as likely to find someone else interested in it." -- Lore Sjöberg

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                                          D Offline
                                          Dan Neely
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #25

                                          IT could also be that your strip might've smoked itself doing it's duty against a major surge. I've also seen claims that newer active power factor correction PSU's don't get along that well with the chunky AC from consumer grade UPSes. No cites though.

                                          It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains. -- Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

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