Losing your temper
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The antivirus fiasco continues with that idiot. So, on another phone conference, and I'm guessing he's holding a grudge because his boss gave him the rough end of his tongue because of the recorded conversations I keep that completely got him into the poopoo pile with his boss (and uncle too), he insinuates that I'm an idiot and a liar. Bad move. Very bad move :mad: I completely lost it and went ape poop. If I'm supposed to look at it in a professional manner then I blew it. BUT, the one and only good part about it, which is silly because this should have happened before, was that the assistant general manager (the owner's son and this idiot's cousin) is siding up with me and they are finally getting things done. Goes to show that sometimes, losing it really helps but seriously destroys your professional image :sigh: JSOP, Jim Crafton and I'm guessing OriginallGriff are going to have fun making fun telling me that sensibilities be damned.
If the post was helpful, please vote, eh! Current activities: Book: Devils by Fyodor Dostoyevsky Project: Hospital Automation, final stage Learning: Image analysis, LINQ Now and forever, defiant to the end. What is Multiple Sclerosis[^]?
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The antivirus fiasco continues with that idiot. So, on another phone conference, and I'm guessing he's holding a grudge because his boss gave him the rough end of his tongue because of the recorded conversations I keep that completely got him into the poopoo pile with his boss (and uncle too), he insinuates that I'm an idiot and a liar. Bad move. Very bad move :mad: I completely lost it and went ape poop. If I'm supposed to look at it in a professional manner then I blew it. BUT, the one and only good part about it, which is silly because this should have happened before, was that the assistant general manager (the owner's son and this idiot's cousin) is siding up with me and they are finally getting things done. Goes to show that sometimes, losing it really helps but seriously destroys your professional image :sigh: JSOP, Jim Crafton and I'm guessing OriginallGriff are going to have fun making fun telling me that sensibilities be damned.
If the post was helpful, please vote, eh! Current activities: Book: Devils by Fyodor Dostoyevsky Project: Hospital Automation, final stage Learning: Image analysis, LINQ Now and forever, defiant to the end. What is Multiple Sclerosis[^]?
Vote of 8 ( if we had that option) The nice thing is always when events are recorded. kind of backs you up. The other thing, yes professionalism is important, however that only goes so far (as we all can agree), Reputation and integrity will hold /back you up more times. I've had similar situation when working helpdesk and the client had to be a lawyer ( worse kind of customer).I won due to skill I demonstrated, knowledge I brought forth (I was the vista specialist on the floor), and was able to counter invalid points he made to me ( about milking company, looking for OT, my call time. all of which was in order.) Best part was, after that confrontation and holding ground, (ya taking alot of abuse from him), he'd come back and hunt for me in the queue. You are in a fun situation, you have to deal with family, but from the sounds of things you also have their respect ( at least that one guys). Kudo's to you. Yes a customer "can always be right", however they do not have the right to be abusive, and you were smart that details were recorded. cheers :)
///////////////// Groucho Marx Those are my principles, if you don't like them… I have others.
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I don't have to lose my temper any more because everyone knows I'm packin' heat. You get a lot more respect and consideration when the person you're talking to knows that you can put a grapefruit-sized hole into any part of their anatomy at pretty much any time (even if they're running away). :)
.45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
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"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
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"The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
everyone knows I'm packin' heat
Yes yes, we all know you've got a hairdryer. I can imagine that conversation "Look out, he's got a bouffant."
"WPF has many lovers. It's a veritable porn star!" - Josh Smith
As Braveheart once said, "You can take our freedom but you'll never take our Hobnobs!" - Martin Hughes.
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The antivirus fiasco continues with that idiot. So, on another phone conference, and I'm guessing he's holding a grudge because his boss gave him the rough end of his tongue because of the recorded conversations I keep that completely got him into the poopoo pile with his boss (and uncle too), he insinuates that I'm an idiot and a liar. Bad move. Very bad move :mad: I completely lost it and went ape poop. If I'm supposed to look at it in a professional manner then I blew it. BUT, the one and only good part about it, which is silly because this should have happened before, was that the assistant general manager (the owner's son and this idiot's cousin) is siding up with me and they are finally getting things done. Goes to show that sometimes, losing it really helps but seriously destroys your professional image :sigh: JSOP, Jim Crafton and I'm guessing OriginallGriff are going to have fun making fun telling me that sensibilities be damned.
If the post was helpful, please vote, eh! Current activities: Book: Devils by Fyodor Dostoyevsky Project: Hospital Automation, final stage Learning: Image analysis, LINQ Now and forever, defiant to the end. What is Multiple Sclerosis[^]?
I detest "professionalism", which is no more than a methodology for lying, deceiving, and misleading people. If you're pissed off about something, I want to know about it, so that I can make appropriate adjustments. I don't want you to *ACT* "professional", keep it to yourself, moan, bitch, and whine about it to other people, or -- and this is always an inevitable result -- stab people in the back by denigrating their work or behaviour at the coffee machine or in the boss' office. If you feel angry, let people know you're angry. Otherwise they won't know, and they'll think you're cool with what they're doing. Summary: I want to work with People, not facades. Don't waste my time by not telling me what you really think.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Sensibilities be damned! Tell 'em all to go to hell!
¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! Personal 3D projects Just Say No to Web 2 Point Blow
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I detest "professionalism", which is no more than a methodology for lying, deceiving, and misleading people. If you're pissed off about something, I want to know about it, so that I can make appropriate adjustments. I don't want you to *ACT* "professional", keep it to yourself, moan, bitch, and whine about it to other people, or -- and this is always an inevitable result -- stab people in the back by denigrating their work or behaviour at the coffee machine or in the boss' office. If you feel angry, let people know you're angry. Otherwise they won't know, and they'll think you're cool with what they're doing. Summary: I want to work with People, not facades. Don't waste my time by not telling me what you really think.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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I detest "professionalism", which is no more than a methodology for lying, deceiving, and misleading people. If you're pissed off about something, I want to know about it, so that I can make appropriate adjustments. I don't want you to *ACT* "professional", keep it to yourself, moan, bitch, and whine about it to other people, or -- and this is always an inevitable result -- stab people in the back by denigrating their work or behaviour at the coffee machine or in the boss' office. If you feel angry, let people know you're angry. Otherwise they won't know, and they'll think you're cool with what they're doing. Summary: I want to work with People, not facades. Don't waste my time by not telling me what you really think.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
I don't know who you're dealing with, but if someone is pulling passive-aggressive nonsense like that and claiming that it's professionalism, it most definitely is not. I see one part of professionalism as being able to say why you don't agree with something while not losing your temper, and not turning it into a pile of back-handed politics. Let people know you're angry, just try not to lose your temper - different people lose it in different ways, and some don't just stop at shouting something that is going to come back and bite them later. It still comes down to the individual to decide when they need to hold their ground and when they might need to compromise (or when they might even *shock* be wrong). Too many people try to twist the term 'professional' to their own advantage - making out that if you're not being a passive-aggressive douche like them, then you're not professional. Do not let them get away with it - professional should mean that you get the job done in the most effective way possible, avoiding as many pitfalls as possible (and pitfalls include unnecessary arguments/office-politicking).
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I don't know who you're dealing with, but if someone is pulling passive-aggressive nonsense like that and claiming that it's professionalism, it most definitely is not. I see one part of professionalism as being able to say why you don't agree with something while not losing your temper, and not turning it into a pile of back-handed politics. Let people know you're angry, just try not to lose your temper - different people lose it in different ways, and some don't just stop at shouting something that is going to come back and bite them later. It still comes down to the individual to decide when they need to hold their ground and when they might need to compromise (or when they might even *shock* be wrong). Too many people try to twist the term 'professional' to their own advantage - making out that if you're not being a passive-aggressive douche like them, then you're not professional. Do not let them get away with it - professional should mean that you get the job done in the most effective way possible, avoiding as many pitfalls as possible (and pitfalls include unnecessary arguments/office-politicking).
Totally agree. Being passive-aggressive and being professional are not the same thing at all. Passive aggressiveness is still an expression of anger and it's an emotional reaction. A professional remembers that it's all about the business, getting the job done. Although we're all human, it's our responsibility as adults to maintain perspective and deal the crap in our life, including our jobs, in an appropriate manner. Put more plainly, just because you feel like "going off" and not caring about the consequences doesn't mean you should. And as for "political correctness", as a person of color I can tell you first hand it has its place in society.
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I detest "professionalism", which is no more than a methodology for lying, deceiving, and misleading people. If you're pissed off about something, I want to know about it, so that I can make appropriate adjustments. I don't want you to *ACT* "professional", keep it to yourself, moan, bitch, and whine about it to other people, or -- and this is always an inevitable result -- stab people in the back by denigrating their work or behaviour at the coffee machine or in the boss' office. If you feel angry, let people know you're angry. Otherwise they won't know, and they'll think you're cool with what they're doing. Summary: I want to work with People, not facades. Don't waste my time by not telling me what you really think.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
Yes but you can let people know you are angry without screaming four letter words at them. My first real systems were in the garment industry back in the 70's - Let me tell you those guys really knew how to express their feelings without once swearing or making every body out to be an idiot. At one time we ended up trading a disc drive to compensate for system issues. Sometimes you walked out of those meetings reeling and wondering if war had been declared but them they would take you out for a nice kosher lunch and every one would be the best of friends again - but at least you knew exactly where you stood - no surprises. Much easier to deal with then the Western busines guys who you never knew if they liked the system or not.
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Yes but you can let people know you are angry without screaming four letter words at them. My first real systems were in the garment industry back in the 70's - Let me tell you those guys really knew how to express their feelings without once swearing or making every body out to be an idiot. At one time we ended up trading a disc drive to compensate for system issues. Sometimes you walked out of those meetings reeling and wondering if war had been declared but them they would take you out for a nice kosher lunch and every one would be the best of friends again - but at least you knew exactly where you stood - no surprises. Much easier to deal with then the Western busines guys who you never knew if they liked the system or not.
You make a good point. But what you're talking about is honesty, sometimes expressed loudly, but honesty nonetheless. My gripe is with mainly with those who personalize hardware/software/design issues and essentially "act out", many times under the guise of being passionate. At the end of the day something either works or it doesn't, and if it doesn't it needs to be fixed. I don't need to "like" code, processor design, people I work with etc., and wish others (mostly developers) felt similarly.
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
everyone knows I'm packin' heat
Yes yes, we all know you've got a hairdryer. I can imagine that conversation "Look out, he's got a bouffant."
"WPF has many lovers. It's a veritable porn star!" - Josh Smith
As Braveheart once said, "You can take our freedom but you'll never take our Hobnobs!" - Martin Hughes.
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Mustafa Ismail Mustafa wrote:
Goes to show that sometimes, losing it really helps but seriously destroys your professional image
Losing your temper can be exactly the right thing to do and will not destory your reputation (as long as you are in the right) and can actually enhance it. You are now seen as someone who stands their ground and does not give way to initimidation and comes out fighting. Good for you.
me, me, me "The dinosaurs became extinct because they didn't have a space program. And if we become extinct because we don't have a space program, it'll serve us right!" Larry Niven
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You make a good point. But what you're talking about is honesty, sometimes expressed loudly, but honesty nonetheless. My gripe is with mainly with those who personalize hardware/software/design issues and essentially "act out", many times under the guise of being passionate. At the end of the day something either works or it doesn't, and if it doesn't it needs to be fixed. I don't need to "like" code, processor design, people I work with etc., and wish others (mostly developers) felt similarly.
True. What really annoys me is when people get all up tight because you find a bug in their stuff. Yeesh it is your software I am having a problem with - not you. Please don't run to my boss saying I am a meany because I said something of yours doesn't work!
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I don't know who you're dealing with, but if someone is pulling passive-aggressive nonsense like that and claiming that it's professionalism, it most definitely is not. I see one part of professionalism as being able to say why you don't agree with something while not losing your temper, and not turning it into a pile of back-handed politics. Let people know you're angry, just try not to lose your temper - different people lose it in different ways, and some don't just stop at shouting something that is going to come back and bite them later. It still comes down to the individual to decide when they need to hold their ground and when they might need to compromise (or when they might even *shock* be wrong). Too many people try to twist the term 'professional' to their own advantage - making out that if you're not being a passive-aggressive douche like them, then you're not professional. Do not let them get away with it - professional should mean that you get the job done in the most effective way possible, avoiding as many pitfalls as possible (and pitfalls include unnecessary arguments/office-politicking).
glenndavidson wrote:
Too many people try to twist the term 'professional' to their own advantage - making out that if you're not being a passive-aggressive douche like them, then you're not professional.
That's the precise definition, in some of the places I've worked, which shell remain nameless -- Oops! That shouldn't have been "hel", it should have been "hal". The entire communications structure of those two places (which I have, of course, not named) is based on sideways whispers and snide remarks, coming from smiling, happy faces. It's not a difficult game to play, but it's not an environment where you can be happy.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!