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  • M Offline
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    Mukesh Kumar Gupta
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

    ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

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    • M Mukesh Kumar Gupta

      It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

      ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Mukesh Kumar Gupta wrote:

      Chandrasekhar Subramanian

      Any relation Rajesh R?

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • M Mukesh Kumar Gupta

        It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

        ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

        H Offline
        H Offline
        Henry Minute
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        First part quite amusing. Last part????? How did the death of Michael Crichton so badly affect the American People?

        Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” Why do programmers often confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.

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        • H Henry Minute

          First part quite amusing. Last part????? How did the death of Michael Crichton so badly affect the American People?

          Henry Minute Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” Why do programmers often confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.

          D Offline
          D Offline
          Dalek Dave
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Proposition 8 passes in California, representing the first ever elimination of an existing right to marry for LGBT couples. Maybe that was what they were refering to?

          ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave

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          • M Mukesh Kumar Gupta

            It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

            ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

            I Offline
            I Offline
            Ian Shlasko
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Mukesh Kumar Gupta wrote:

            And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

            This joke made more sense when it referred to Dubya winning in 2000 :)

            Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in?
            Author of the Guardians Saga (Sci-Fi/Fantasy novels)

            C 1 Reply Last reply
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            • M Mukesh Kumar Gupta

              It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

              ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

              C Offline
              C Offline
              Chris Losinger
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              how odd that "the American people", who gave Obama a decisive victory in 2008, would immediately think they were screwed. why it's almost as if the person who wrote that has imagined his own opinions are shared by most of the country.... a common failing of people with such opinions, it seems.

              image processing toolkits | batch image processing

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              • C Chris Losinger

                how odd that "the American people", who gave Obama a decisive victory in 2008, would immediately think they were screwed. why it's almost as if the person who wrote that has imagined his own opinions are shared by most of the country.... a common failing of people with such opinions, it seems.

                image processing toolkits | batch image processing

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                J Offline
                Joe Woodbury
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Chris Losinger wrote:

                how odd that "the American people", who gave Obama a decisive victory in 2008, would immediately think they were screwed.

                True, it took about a year.

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                • I Ian Shlasko

                  Mukesh Kumar Gupta wrote:

                  And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

                  This joke made more sense when it referred to Dubya winning in 2000 :)

                  Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in?
                  Author of the Guardians Saga (Sci-Fi/Fantasy novels)

                  C Offline
                  C Offline
                  Chris Losinger
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  it really did, especially since W lost the popular vote.

                  image processing toolkits | batch image processing

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                  • C Chris Losinger

                    how odd that "the American people", who gave Obama a decisive victory in 2008, would immediately think they were screwed. why it's almost as if the person who wrote that has imagined his own opinions are shared by most of the country.... a common failing of people with such opinions, it seems.

                    image processing toolkits | batch image processing

                    W Offline
                    W Offline
                    wolfbinary
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Chris Losinger wrote:

                    why it's almost as if the person who wrote that has imagined his own opinions are shared by most of the country.... a common failing of people with such opinions, it seems.

                    It is the same failing of anyone who utters the phrase "Most Americans" since no one can no most Americans. This is of course usually said by the pundits on TV.

                    That's called seagull management (or sometimes pigeon management)... Fly in, flap your arms and squawk a lot, crap all over everything and fly out again... by _Damian S_

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • M Mukesh Kumar Gupta

                      It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

                      ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

                      4 Offline
                      4 Offline
                      4277480
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Old.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • M Mukesh Kumar Gupta

                        It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'F*ck the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little ****. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, 'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh ****, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietlly, "I think it was the American people, November 4, 2008."

                        ~~~ I don't have signature. Am I not trendy enough? ~~~

                        F Offline
                        F Offline
                        Flynn Arrowstarr Regular Schmoe
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        There are only a few professions older than this joke... :-\ Flynn

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                        • C Chris Losinger

                          how odd that "the American people", who gave Obama a decisive victory in 2008, would immediately think they were screwed. why it's almost as if the person who wrote that has imagined his own opinions are shared by most of the country.... a common failing of people with such opinions, it seems.

                          image processing toolkits | batch image processing

                          H Offline
                          H Offline
                          Hired Mind
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          True. The "Oh ****" feeling took hold slowly, over the course of the next year as Obama began to dismantle the economy and send the country into the tailspin we're in now. In that year, he's increased the deficit as much as W did in his entire presidency.

                          Before .NET 4.0, object Universe = NULL;

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                          • H Hired Mind

                            True. The "Oh ****" feeling took hold slowly, over the course of the next year as Obama began to dismantle the economy and send the country into the tailspin we're in now. In that year, he's increased the deficit as much as W did in his entire presidency.

                            Before .NET 4.0, object Universe = NULL;

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                            C Offline
                            Chris Losinger
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Hired Mind wrote:

                            as Obama began to dismantle the economy

                            dismantle the economy. right. and then he forced everyone to get gay muslim abortions at the state run re-education centers in Kenya, while doing coke off Rev Wrights naked ass. http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/recoveryanniversary/[^]

                            image processing toolkits | batch image processing

                            modified on Friday, June 4, 2010 5:44 PM

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                            • C Chris Losinger

                              Hired Mind wrote:

                              as Obama began to dismantle the economy

                              dismantle the economy. right. and then he forced everyone to get gay muslim abortions at the state run re-education centers in Kenya, while doing coke off Rev Wrights naked ass. http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/recoveryanniversary/[^]

                              image processing toolkits | batch image processing

                              modified on Friday, June 4, 2010 5:44 PM

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                              H Offline
                              Hired Mind
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              My rebuttal: http://data.bls.gov/PDQ/servlet/SurveyOutputServlet?data_tool=latest_numbers&series_id=LNU04000000&years_option=all_years&periods_option=specific_periods&periods=Annual+Data[^] Unemployment rate in 2001: 4.7% Today: 9.3% I'm thinking the president's own propaganda site isn't the best source for hard facts about his performance. How's that Kool-aid taste?

                              Before .NET 4.0, object Universe = NULL;

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                              • H Hired Mind

                                My rebuttal: http://data.bls.gov/PDQ/servlet/SurveyOutputServlet?data_tool=latest_numbers&series_id=LNU04000000&years_option=all_years&periods_option=specific_periods&periods=Annual+Data[^] Unemployment rate in 2001: 4.7% Today: 9.3% I'm thinking the president's own propaganda site isn't the best source for hard facts about his performance. How's that Kool-aid taste?

                                Before .NET 4.0, object Universe = NULL;

                                C Offline
                                C Offline
                                Chris Losinger
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                it was 8.1% on Bush's last day. thanks, Republicans! you guys are the best. sure, you suck at math, and economic policy, and war making, and war planning, and intelligence, and well, pretty much everything. but, you're good for a laugh. and you sure know how to dig a big (economic) hole ! oh well, off to take my True Communist Test (as mandated by the secret law passed at the UN last weekend) ! they're sending a black helicopter just for me and my radical liberal feminazi minders. wish me luck, comrade!

                                image processing toolkits | batch image processing

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                                • C Chris Losinger

                                  it was 8.1% on Bush's last day. thanks, Republicans! you guys are the best. sure, you suck at math, and economic policy, and war making, and war planning, and intelligence, and well, pretty much everything. but, you're good for a laugh. and you sure know how to dig a big (economic) hole ! oh well, off to take my True Communist Test (as mandated by the secret law passed at the UN last weekend) ! they're sending a black helicopter just for me and my radical liberal feminazi minders. wish me luck, comrade!

                                  image processing toolkits | batch image processing

                                  H Offline
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                                  Hired Mind
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  Chris Losinger wrote:

                                  it was 8.1% on Bush's last day.

                                  The BLS, whose job it is to track unemployment, disagrees with you. They say it was 5.8%. Why didn't you just make up a figure that was over 10%? Then you could have claimed that Obama had helped unemployment. Jeez, even in the land of liberal make-believe, Obama is hurting the economy. http://data.bls.gov/PDQ/servlet/SurveyOutputServlet?data_tool=latest_numbers&series_id=LNU04000000&years_option=all_years&periods_option=specific_periods&periods=Annual+Data[^]

                                  Before .NET 4.0, object Universe = NULL;

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                                  • H Hired Mind

                                    Chris Losinger wrote:

                                    it was 8.1% on Bush's last day.

                                    The BLS, whose job it is to track unemployment, disagrees with you. They say it was 5.8%. Why didn't you just make up a figure that was over 10%? Then you could have claimed that Obama had helped unemployment. Jeez, even in the land of liberal make-believe, Obama is hurting the economy. http://data.bls.gov/PDQ/servlet/SurveyOutputServlet?data_tool=latest_numbers&series_id=LNU04000000&years_option=all_years&periods_option=specific_periods&periods=Annual+Data[^]

                                    Before .NET 4.0, object Universe = NULL;

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                                    C Offline
                                    Chris Losinger
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    Hired Mind wrote:

                                    The BLS, whose job it is to track unemployment, disagrees with you.

                                    the data from the first graph i linked to (you know, the one you called "the president's own propaganda site") came from the BLS.

                                    Hired Mind wrote:

                                    They say it was 5.8%.

                                    2008 had an average of 5.8. it started at 4.9 and ended at 7.2. the last time it was 5.8% was July of 08. furthermore, Bush's last day in office was in Jan 2009. and Jan 09 closed with a rate of 7.6% (not 8.1%, which was feb 09. my bad), after rising nearly 3 percentage points from its lowest point in 2008. nearly 3 points in 13 months. all under Bush. http://www.bls.gov/opub/ted/2009/feb/wk2/art02.htm[^] thanks again, idiot Republicans!

                                    image processing toolkits | batch image processing

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