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Historical insults

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  • RaviBeeR RaviBee

    These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

    • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
    • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
    • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
    • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
    • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
    • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
    • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
    • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
    • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
    • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
    • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
    • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
    • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
    • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
    • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
    • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
    • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
    • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
    • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
    • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

    /ravi

    My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #2

    I like this one: Bessie Braddock: “Sir, you are drunk.” Churchill: “Madam, you are ugly. In the morning, I shall be sober.”

    J 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • RaviBeeR RaviBee

      These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

      • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
      • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
      • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
      • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
      • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
      • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
      • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
      • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
      • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
      • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
      • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
      • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
      • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
      • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
      • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
      • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
      • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
      • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
      • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
      • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

      /ravi

      My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

      C Offline
      C Offline
      Chris Meech
      wrote on last edited by
      #3

      Another favourite of mine. The weather is here, wish you were beautiful. - Jimmy Buffet.

      Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • RaviBeeR RaviBee

        These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

        • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
        • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
        • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
        • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
        • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
        • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
        • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
        • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
        • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
        • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
        • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
        • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
        • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
        • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
        • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
        • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
        • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
        • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
        • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
        • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

        /ravi

        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

        N Offline
        N Offline
        Nish Nishant
        wrote on last edited by
        #4

        Or the more recent reddit picture comment over a photo of justin bieber drinking coffee with selena gomez - 2 girls, 1 cup.

        Regards, Nish


        Are you addicted to CP? If so, check this out: The Code Project Forum Analyzer : Find out how much of a life you don't have! My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

        L N L B 4 Replies Last reply
        0
        • N Nish Nishant

          Or the more recent reddit picture comment over a photo of justin bieber drinking coffee with selena gomez - 2 girls, 1 cup.

          Regards, Nish


          Are you addicted to CP? If so, check this out: The Code Project Forum Analyzer : Find out how much of a life you don't have! My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

          L Offline
          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #5

          Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

          2 girls, 1 cup

          Sounds like the Student Union Bar to me.

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • RaviBeeR RaviBee

            These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

            • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
            • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
            • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
            • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
            • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
            • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
            • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
            • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
            • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
            • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
            • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
            • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
            • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
            • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
            • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
            • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
            • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
            • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
            • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
            • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

            /ravi

            My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

            C Offline
            C Offline
            Christian Graus
            wrote on last edited by
            #6

            Paul Keating is historical ?

            Christian Graus Driven to the arms of OSX by Vista. Read my blog to find out how I've worked around bugs in Microsoft tools and frameworks.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • RaviBeeR RaviBee

              These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

              • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
              • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
              • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
              • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
              • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
              • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
              • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
              • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
              • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
              • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
              • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
              • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
              • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
              • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
              • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
              • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
              • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
              • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
              • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
              • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

              /ravi

              My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

              D Offline
              D Offline
              Dalek Dave
              wrote on last edited by
              #7

              Clive Anderson, interviewing Jeffery Archer... "Jeffery Archer, Member of Parliament, Journalist, Best Selling Author...is there no beginning to your talent?"

              ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] Trolls[^]

              L 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • N Nish Nishant

                Or the more recent reddit picture comment over a photo of justin bieber drinking coffee with selena gomez - 2 girls, 1 cup.

                Regards, Nish


                Are you addicted to CP? If so, check this out: The Code Project Forum Analyzer : Find out how much of a life you don't have! My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

                N Offline
                N Offline
                Nagy Vilmos
                wrote on last edited by
                #8

                Link to two girls one cup[^], dare you click?


                Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                S 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • D Dalek Dave

                  Clive Anderson, interviewing Jeffery Archer... "Jeffery Archer, Member of Parliament, Journalist, Best Selling Author...is there no beginning to your talent?"

                  ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] Trolls[^]

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #9

                  Which was nicer than he was to The Bee Gees.

                  Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                    Link to two girls one cup[^], dare you click?


                    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    Slacker007
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #10

                    horrifying.

                    Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • RaviBeeR RaviBee

                      These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

                      • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
                      • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
                      • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
                      • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
                      • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
                      • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
                      • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
                      • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
                      • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
                      • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
                      • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
                      • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
                      • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
                      • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
                      • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
                      • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
                      • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
                      • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
                      • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
                      • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

                      /ravi

                      My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Roger Wright
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #11

                      "On entering a room, he makes everyone feel as if someone interesting has just left." Unknown author, but freely plagiarized by me over several decades...

                      Will Rogers never met me.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • RaviBeeR RaviBee

                        These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

                        • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
                        • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
                        • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
                        • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
                        • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
                        • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
                        • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
                        • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
                        • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
                        • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
                        • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
                        • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
                        • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
                        • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
                        • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
                        • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
                        • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
                        • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
                        • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
                        • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

                        /ravi

                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

                        T Offline
                        T Offline
                        thatraja
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #12

                        Where is Chuck Norris?

                        thatraja


                        **My Tip/Tricks
                        My Dad had a Heart Attack on this day so don't...
                        **

                        L 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • T thatraja

                          Where is Chuck Norris?

                          thatraja


                          **My Tip/Tricks
                          My Dad had a Heart Attack on this day so don't...
                          **

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #13

                          Probably being tedious and hypocritically preachy somewhere.

                          Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                          C 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • RaviBeeR RaviBee

                            These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

                            • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
                            • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
                            • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
                            • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
                            • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
                            • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
                            • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
                            • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
                            • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
                            • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
                            • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
                            • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
                            • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
                            • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
                            • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
                            • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
                            • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
                            • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
                            • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
                            • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

                            /ravi

                            My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

                            C Offline
                            C Offline
                            clientSurfer
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #14

                            "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • N Nish Nishant

                              Or the more recent reddit picture comment over a photo of justin bieber drinking coffee with selena gomez - 2 girls, 1 cup.

                              Regards, Nish


                              Are you addicted to CP? If so, check this out: The Code Project Forum Analyzer : Find out how much of a life you don't have! My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

                              L Offline
                              L Offline
                              lewax00
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #15

                              Reminds me of a list on some website, Top 50 Women of 2010 or something of that sort...Justin Beiber is #7.

                              N 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • RaviBeeR RaviBee

                                These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

                                • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
                                • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
                                • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
                                • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
                                • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
                                • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
                                • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
                                • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
                                • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
                                • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
                                • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
                                • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
                                • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
                                • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
                                • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
                                • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
                                • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
                                • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
                                • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
                                • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

                                /ravi

                                My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

                                G Offline
                                G Offline
                                Gary Wheeler
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #16

                                The politely-phrased cutting remark; an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.

                                Software Zen: delete this;

                                L 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • G Gary Wheeler

                                  The politely-phrased cutting remark; an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.

                                  Software Zen: delete this;

                                  L Offline
                                  L Offline
                                  lewax00
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #17

                                  These were your father's insults...

                                  G 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L lewax00

                                    Reminds me of a list on some website, Top 50 Women of 2010 or something of that sort...Justin Beiber is #7.

                                    N Offline
                                    N Offline
                                    Nagy Vilmos
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #18

                                    50 most popular women on the web[^] and [s]he's #7.


                                    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                                    L L 2 Replies Last reply
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                                    • L Lost User

                                      I like this one: Bessie Braddock: “Sir, you are drunk.” Churchill: “Madam, you are ugly. In the morning, I shall be sober.”

                                      J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      jeron1
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #19

                                      So that's where these song lyrics came from! Yes I'm drunk but damn you're ugly Tell you one thing, yes I will Tomorrow morning I'll be sober And you'll be just as ugly still... James McMurtry (Red Dress)

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                                      0
                                      • RaviBeeR RaviBee

                                        These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

                                        • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
                                        • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
                                        • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
                                        • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
                                        • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
                                        • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
                                        • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
                                        • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
                                        • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
                                        • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
                                        • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
                                        • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
                                        • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
                                        • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
                                        • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
                                        • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
                                        • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
                                        • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
                                        • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
                                        • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

                                        /ravi

                                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

                                        Mike HankeyM Offline
                                        Mike HankeyM Offline
                                        Mike Hankey
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #20

                                        All worth a 5 but could only give you one I'll let you determine which one. :)

                                        I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other.

                                        RaviBeeR 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • RaviBeeR RaviBee

                                          These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

                                          • The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
                                          • A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
                                          • "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
                                          • "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
                                          • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
                                          • "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
                                          • "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
                                          • "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
                                          • "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
                                          • "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
                                          • "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
                                          • "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
                                          • "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand
                                          • "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
                                          • "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
                                          • "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
                                          • "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." - Oscar Wilde
                                          • "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
                                          • "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
                                          • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

                                          /ravi

                                          My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles |

                                          A Offline
                                          A Offline
                                          AspDotNetDev
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #21

                                          "You shut your mouth when you're talking to me!" -- My Friends

                                          Martin Fowler wrote:

                                          Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand.

                                          T L C 3 Replies Last reply
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