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Poetry Written in Code Contest

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  • A Andrew Rissing

    A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

    float myhope;
    float mypride;
    if (myhope is Empty)
    Goto ZeroDivide;

    M Offline
    M Offline
    Marc Clifton
    wrote on last edited by
    #6

    And in Haiku:

    double myTrouble;
    if (sheFindsOut(myTrouble))
    {
    SummerDaysAreGone();
    }

    Marc

    My Blog
    An Agile walk on the wild side with Relationship Oriented Programming
    Melody's Amazon Herb Site

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    • D Dalek Dave

      . . / | { , , SYSTEM HALTED

      . . / Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash, | { , , SYSTEM HALTED Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH.

      ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] Trolls[^]

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      R Offline
      Rage
      wrote on last edited by
      #7

      Plain awesome. Tchak klick boum.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • A Andrew Rissing

        A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

        float myhope;
        float mypride;
        if (myhope is Empty)
        Goto ZeroDivide;

        R Offline
        R Offline
        Rage
        wrote on last edited by
        #8

        if (life == ToBe)
        return Question
        else if (life != ToBe)
        return Question

        A S M K F 6 Replies Last reply
        0
        • M Marc Clifton

          And in Haiku:

          double myTrouble;
          if (sheFindsOut(myTrouble))
          {
          SummerDaysAreGone();
          }

          Marc

          My Blog
          An Agile walk on the wild side with Relationship Oriented Programming
          Melody's Amazon Herb Site

          A Offline
          A Offline
          Andrew Rissing
          wrote on last edited by
          #9

          :-D +5

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • R Rage

            if (life == ToBe)
            return Question
            else if (life != ToBe)
            return Question

            A Offline
            A Offline
            Andrew Rissing
            wrote on last edited by
            #10

            Not really poetry, but amusing regardless. +5

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • H Henry Minute

              Thank you Sid James. It only needs a last line of Hick. Hike. Hock.[^] to be perfect.

              Henry Minute Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus! When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is. Cogito ergo thumb - Sucking my thumb helps me to think.

              A Offline
              A Offline
              AspDotNetDev
              wrote on last edited by
              #11

              At first, I thought you were talking about William James Sidis, and I thought, "it wasn't THAT good."

              Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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              • A AspDotNetDev

                At first, I thought you were talking about William James Sidis, and I thought, "it wasn't THAT good."

                Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

                H Offline
                H Offline
                Henry Minute
                wrote on last edited by
                #12

                Wikipedia wrote:

                From writings on cosmology, to American Indian history, to a comprehensive and definitive taxonomy of vehicle transfers

                What's one of them?

                Henry Minute Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus! When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is. Cogito ergo thumb - Sucking my thumb helps me to think.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • A Andrew Rissing

                  A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                  float myhope;
                  float mypride;
                  if (myhope is Empty)
                  Goto ZeroDivide;

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #13

                  /* Program LIFE
                  Implementation date: 04/12/60
                  Author: H.H. Evans
                  www.hiraethog.org
                  Notes: Run once only.
                  Parameters: None.
                  Date : 07/10/95
                  */

                  While NOT EndOfLife
                  DO();
                  Seek_Nipple();
                  Mimic_Betters();
                  Rebel();
                  Seek_Nipple();

                    MULTIPLY self BY wife GIVING children;
                    If Age < PastCaring% then
                       Birthday\_Candles% = Birthday\_Candles% + 1;
                    endIf
                  
                    Regret(Lost\_Opportunity);
                    WishFor(Youth);
                    ACCEPT Fate;
                  

                  ENDDO;

                  EndWhile;

                  STOP RUN.

                  www.hiraethog.org

                  P 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • R Rage

                    if (life == ToBe)
                    return Question
                    else if (life != ToBe)
                    return Question

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    StephenPhillips
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #14

                    if (life == ToBe)
                    return Question;
                    else if (life != ToBe)
                    return Question;

                    given only two wholly mutually exclusive conditions, this could be simplified to

                    return Question;

                    Either Hamlet was overcomplicating his problem or he was a stickler for convolution. Or perhaps it should be taken more literally as

                    return (ToBe == true);

                    But no, this is silly - this only takes the first condition and ignores the rest of the system specification. Besides which, it somehow doesn't have the same ring to it this way.

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                    • S StephenPhillips

                      if (life == ToBe)
                      return Question;
                      else if (life != ToBe)
                      return Question;

                      given only two wholly mutually exclusive conditions, this could be simplified to

                      return Question;

                      Either Hamlet was overcomplicating his problem or he was a stickler for convolution. Or perhaps it should be taken more literally as

                      return (ToBe == true);

                      But no, this is silly - this only takes the first condition and ignores the rest of the system specification. Besides which, it somehow doesn't have the same ring to it this way.

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Rage
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #15

                      Seems like you are slightly getting all the subtleties of Shakespeare's genius ;P OTOH, it is disastrous to see how the best translation in programming language, namely return Question; ( as you very correctly pointed out ) completely ruins the effect.

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                      • R Rage

                        if (life == ToBe)
                        return Question
                        else if (life != ToBe)
                        return Question

                        M Offline
                        M Offline
                        Member 4289613
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #16

                        We can optimize it! :))

                        if (life == ToBe || life != ToBe)
                        return Question

                        So, finally, that's the statement:

                        if (true)
                        return Question

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                        • R Rage

                          Seems like you are slightly getting all the subtleties of Shakespeare's genius ;P OTOH, it is disastrous to see how the best translation in programming language, namely return Question; ( as you very correctly pointed out ) completely ruins the effect.

                          N Offline
                          N Offline
                          Norman Dziedzic
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #17

                          Question = (2 * b) || !(2 * b); Is a nicer form but still only = Question; Then again Wit.soul = brevity;

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                          • A Andrew Rissing

                            A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                            float myhope;
                            float mypride;
                            if (myhope is Empty)
                            Goto ZeroDivide;

                            U Offline
                            U Offline
                            User 8527408
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #18

                            //OK, so it's plagerism! bool shallI; string thee; shallI = chkShallI.Checked; thee = txtYou.Text; string str1 = "Summers Day"; woman thou; if (shallI) { if (thee.Compare(str1) > 0) { thou.Loveliness += str1.Loveliness; //string extension method thou.Temperateness += str1.Temperateness // or you.Temperature ?? } else { thou.Loveliness -= str1.Loveliness; thou.Temperateness -= str1.Temperateness } }

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • L Lost User

                              /* Program LIFE
                              Implementation date: 04/12/60
                              Author: H.H. Evans
                              www.hiraethog.org
                              Notes: Run once only.
                              Parameters: None.
                              Date : 07/10/95
                              */

                              While NOT EndOfLife
                              DO();
                              Seek_Nipple();
                              Mimic_Betters();
                              Rebel();
                              Seek_Nipple();

                                MULTIPLY self BY wife GIVING children;
                                If Age < PastCaring% then
                                   Birthday\_Candles% = Birthday\_Candles% + 1;
                                endIf
                              
                                Regret(Lost\_Opportunity);
                                WishFor(Youth);
                                ACCEPT Fate;
                              

                              ENDDO;

                              EndWhile;

                              STOP RUN.

                              www.hiraethog.org

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                              P Offline
                              Peter Kassenaar
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #19

                              Very Nice. The full circle of life in a while loop.

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • A Andrew Rissing

                                A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                                float myhope;
                                float mypride;
                                if (myhope is Empty)
                                Goto ZeroDivide;

                                J Offline
                                J Offline
                                Jeffrey Ryman
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #20

                                I don't have a poem, but I do have an interesting (I hope) story. I learned to program back in the 1960s on IBM equipment using punch cards. One evening four years ago I was waiting for my food in a Mexican fast food joint in Las Vegas and having a casual conversation with a couple of other customers about my age when the discussion somehow turned to old computers and using cards. It turned out that this lady and her husband had been programmers in the military back during the Vietnam war. While her husband was stationed someplace in South Vietnam, she was back in the US. During the period he remained overseas they exchanged love letters on punch cards. Their correspondence may or may not have rhymed, but I'm sure it was poetry to them. :-D

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                                • A Andrew Rissing

                                  A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                                  float myhope;
                                  float mypride;
                                  if (myhope is Empty)
                                  Goto ZeroDivide;

                                  M Offline
                                  M Offline
                                  Mark Miller
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #21

                                  :laugh: Wow! Does this mean I can use Goto in my code again? :laugh: Oh, Goto, I've missed you so You so helped my code to blow Now you've come to me again I can write again with sin! Ok, so it isn't in code, but it's about code...

                                  Sincerely, -Mark mamiller@rhsnet.org

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • S StephenPhillips

                                    if (life == ToBe)
                                    return Question;
                                    else if (life != ToBe)
                                    return Question;

                                    given only two wholly mutually exclusive conditions, this could be simplified to

                                    return Question;

                                    Either Hamlet was overcomplicating his problem or he was a stickler for convolution. Or perhaps it should be taken more literally as

                                    return (ToBe == true);

                                    But no, this is silly - this only takes the first condition and ignores the rest of the system specification. Besides which, it somehow doesn't have the same ring to it this way.

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    CaptJosh
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #22

                                    Perhaps make the two conditions and make them part of the same conditional? e.g.

                                    if ((life == ToBe ) || ( life != ToBe ))
                                    return Question;

                                    CaptJosh There are only 10 kinds of people in the world; those who understand binary and those who don't.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • A Andrew Rissing

                                      A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                                      float myhope;
                                      float mypride;
                                      if (myhope is Empty)
                                      Goto ZeroDivide;

                                      M Offline
                                      M Offline
                                      Michael A Cochran
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #23

                                      How about SQL? DECLARE @ROSE CHAR(1); SELECT @ROSE=IS_ROSE FROM GARDEN WHERE NAME IN (SELECT @NAME FROM NAMES); DECLARE @IS_SWEET CHAR(1); SELECT @IS_SWEET=@IS_ROSE;

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • A Andrew Rissing

                                        A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                                        float myhope;
                                        float mypride;
                                        if (myhope is Empty)
                                        Goto ZeroDivide;

                                        S Offline
                                        S Offline
                                        SirTimothy
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #24

                                        Adapted from an excerpt from Dr. Seuss' Fox In Socks. Not quite as smooth as I'd like, but it works.

                                        if (fighter1 is TweetleBeetle
                                        && fighter2 is TweetleBeetle
                                        && theWeapon is Paddle
                                        && thePlace is Puddle
                                        && thePlace.place is Bottle)
                                        return new TweetleBeetleBottlePuddlePaddleBattleMuddle();

                                        If fighter one is tweetle beetle, Fighter two is tweetle beetle, And the weapon is a paddle, And the place is a puddle, And the place's place is bottle, then return new TweetleBeetleBottlePuddlePaddleBattleMuddle

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • A Andrew Rissing

                                          A few coworkers were joking about writing poetry in code and I was curious to put it up here as a challenge to others. The premise is that you must write something that is poetry that is reasonably compilable (i.e. excluding the scaffolding of the language of choice). Bonus points if it produces output that is relevant to the theme of the poem. Here is an example to get you started:

                                          float myhope;
                                          float mypride;
                                          if (myhope is Empty)
                                          Goto ZeroDivide;

                                          A Offline
                                          A Offline
                                          Aiscrim
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #25

                                          If this is real Then
                                          Nothing
                                          Else
                                          matters(2, Me)

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