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Spam Email - Epic Failure

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  • L Lost User

    Evidently, the spammers don't know how to trap a guy like me. Here is the latest fail: Looking for a guy that can dominate me in bed and put me how he wants me. I'm just looking for a fwb's not a relationship. I just need some relief every now and then ;) my pix are here: [link removed] The spammers really need to up their game a notch or two. Here is an example of spam that would work on me: Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse. I'll be married 24 years in December. Does it show?

    W Offline
    W Offline
    Wjousts
    wrote on last edited by
    #8

    MehGerbil wrote:

    I'll be married 24 years in December.

    You'd get less for murder!

    D D 2 Replies Last reply
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    • W Wjousts

      I'm 11 years a week on Saturday.

      D Offline
      D Offline
      Dalek Dave
      wrote on last edited by
      #9

      ooh, soon be going to the big school!

      --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

      W 1 Reply Last reply
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      • W Wjousts

        MehGerbil wrote:

        I'll be married 24 years in December.

        You'd get less for murder!

        D Offline
        D Offline
        Dalek Dave
        wrote on last edited by
        #10

        He's be out by now!

        --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

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        • N Nagy Vilmos

          She's got you trained too then. I'll have been married 11 years next Friday and/or Saturday.


          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

          L Offline
          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #11

          You may want to work out the exact date on that.

          N 1 Reply Last reply
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          • L Lost User

            Evidently, the spammers don't know how to trap a guy like me. Here is the latest fail: Looking for a guy that can dominate me in bed and put me how he wants me. I'm just looking for a fwb's not a relationship. I just need some relief every now and then ;) my pix are here: [link removed] The spammers really need to up their game a notch or two. Here is an example of spam that would work on me: Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse. I'll be married 24 years in December. Does it show?

            G Offline
            G Offline
            gavindon
            wrote on last edited by
            #12

            19 years here, two rules. 1# the wife is always right 2# when the wife is wrong, refer to rule number 1. hardly ever argue :-D

            Common sense is not a gift it's a curse. Those of us who have it have to deal with those that don't.... Be careful which toes you step on today, they might be connected to the foot that kicks your butt tomorrow. You can't scare me, I have children.

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            • L Lost User

              You may want to work out the exact date on that.

              N Offline
              N Offline
              Nagy Vilmos
              wrote on last edited by
              #13

              It is the exact date, we did it twice - marriage that is.


              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

              D L 2 Replies Last reply
              0
              • N Nagy Vilmos

                It is the exact date, we did it twice - marriage that is.


                Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                D Offline
                D Offline
                Dalek Dave
                wrote on last edited by
                #14

                That is why I didn't question it, I remembered you told me in the pub!

                --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • G gavindon

                  19 years here, two rules. 1# the wife is always right 2# when the wife is wrong, refer to rule number 1. hardly ever argue :-D

                  Common sense is not a gift it's a curse. Those of us who have it have to deal with those that don't.... Be careful which toes you step on today, they might be connected to the foot that kicks your butt tomorrow. You can't scare me, I have children.

                  D Offline
                  D Offline
                  Dalek Dave
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #15

                  gavindon wrote:

                  hardly ever argue

                  Well, not to her face!

                  --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • L Lost User

                    Evidently, the spammers don't know how to trap a guy like me. Here is the latest fail: Looking for a guy that can dominate me in bed and put me how he wants me. I'm just looking for a fwb's not a relationship. I just need some relief every now and then ;) my pix are here: [link removed] The spammers really need to up their game a notch or two. Here is an example of spam that would work on me: Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse. I'll be married 24 years in December. Does it show?

                    C Offline
                    C Offline
                    CalvinHobbies
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #16

                    MehGerbil wrote:

                    Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse.

                    Need to add in "bed warmer."

                    ///////////////// -Negative, I am a meat popsicle.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • W Wjousts

                      MehGerbil wrote:

                      I'll be married 24 years in December.

                      You'd get less for murder!

                      D Offline
                      D Offline
                      Doctor Nick
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #17

                      Indeed, buy the lying in bed part is a bit more enjoyable when not in prison... :-D

                      ------------------------------------- Do not do what has already been done. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.. but it ROCKS absolutely, too.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • L Lost User

                        Evidently, the spammers don't know how to trap a guy like me. Here is the latest fail: Looking for a guy that can dominate me in bed and put me how he wants me. I'm just looking for a fwb's not a relationship. I just need some relief every now and then ;) my pix are here: [link removed] The spammers really need to up their game a notch or two. Here is an example of spam that would work on me: Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse. I'll be married 24 years in December. Does it show?

                        Mike HankeyM Offline
                        Mike HankeyM Offline
                        Mike Hankey
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #18

                        MehGerbil wrote:

                        I'll be married 24 years in December.
                        Does it show?

                        Yes :)

                        VS2010/Atmel Studio 6.0 ToDo Manager Extension
                        Version 3.0 now available. There is no place like 127.0.0.1

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • N Nagy Vilmos

                          It is the exact date, we did it twice - marriage that is.


                          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #19

                          You didn't learn the first time, eh?

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L Lost User

                            Evidently, the spammers don't know how to trap a guy like me. Here is the latest fail: Looking for a guy that can dominate me in bed and put me how he wants me. I'm just looking for a fwb's not a relationship. I just need some relief every now and then ;) my pix are here: [link removed] The spammers really need to up their game a notch or two. Here is an example of spam that would work on me: Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse. I'll be married 24 years in December. Does it show?

                            R Offline
                            R Offline
                            R Giskard Reventlov
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #20

                            17 years and I've got her exactly where she wants me.

                            "If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              Evidently, the spammers don't know how to trap a guy like me. Here is the latest fail: Looking for a guy that can dominate me in bed and put me how he wants me. I'm just looking for a fwb's not a relationship. I just need some relief every now and then ;) my pix are here: [link removed] The spammers really need to up their game a notch or two. Here is an example of spam that would work on me: Required: spineless programmer who displays no stereotypical male traits whatsoever. Must occupy less than 1/4th of a queen sized bed and be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night. Ability to squash spiders, do dishes, and follow simple commands is must. Must be obvilious to the presence of other females and enjoy standing around in crowded stores while holding a purse. I'll be married 24 years in December. Does it show?

                              D Offline
                              D Offline
                              DeathByChocolate
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #21

                              MehGerbil wrote:

                              be willing to warm my cold feet with his back at all hours of the night

                              :cool: That's my kind of man!

                              "State acheived after eating too many chocolate-covered coconut bars - bountiful" Chris C-B

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • D Dalek Dave

                                ooh, soon be going to the big school!

                                --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                                W Offline
                                W Offline
                                Wjousts
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #22

                                I had no life before then...at least that's what the wife tells me.

                                1 Reply Last reply
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