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  4. Beware of the Lawyers!!!

Beware of the Lawyers!!!

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  • C Offline
    C Offline
    Chandrasekharan P
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary. On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??" He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!" She quickly fell on her knees apologizing. No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

    Every new day is another chance to change your life.

    L M D P 4 Replies Last reply
    0
    • C Chandrasekharan P

      A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary. On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??" He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!" She quickly fell on her knees apologizing. No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

      Every new day is another chance to change your life.

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      That's an awful joke, but it does remind me of Rene Artois from 'Allo 'Allo and his "you stupid woman" line.

      K 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • C Chandrasekharan P

        A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary. On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??" He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!" She quickly fell on her knees apologizing. No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

        Every new day is another chance to change your life.

        M Offline
        M Offline
        Mohibur Rashid
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        First of all, this is not funny and secondly you tried to make it funny with a really brutal fact, what were you thinking?

        C 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • M Mohibur Rashid

          First of all, this is not funny and secondly you tried to make it funny with a really brutal fact, what were you thinking?

          C Offline
          C Offline
          Chandrasekharan P
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Mohibur Rashid wrote:

          what were you thinking

          Absolutely nothing. A joke should be taken as a joke. I do it that way. Others have their way of interpreting it.

          Every new day is another chance to change your life.

          N 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • C Chandrasekharan P

            A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary. On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??" He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!" She quickly fell on her knees apologizing. No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

            Every new day is another chance to change your life.

            D Offline
            D Offline
            Dalek Dave
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

            A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary.

            Could you describe this fun? Was it phoning people up and making prank calls, or were they playing poker perhaps?

            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

            On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??"

            I find it hard to believe his wife wouldn't recognise panties, so this story is starting to unravel somewhat.

            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

            He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!"

            Where did this desire for jewellery come from? It hadn't been mentioned before that the wife wanted jewellery, and anyway, couldn't she simply buy her own? Why would she be dependant upon her husband?

            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

            She quickly fell on her knees apologizing.

            I cannot see why she would fall to her knees. Is she used to being beaten, or did he make unreasonable demands for supplication? No woman I know would fall to their knees, and especially not for a simple misunderstanding.

            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

            No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

            Apart from the appalling grammar, it is clear that this line is incorrect. In a court case one side must lose, therefore lawyers are beaten. This tale you tell, it seems rather suspicious, I am inclined to think it is not true, that you have invented it for amusement and yet I find myself, rather like Queen Victoria, strangely unamused. Also, a single exclamation mark is suffice.

            --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

            C P M 3 Replies Last reply
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            • C Chandrasekharan P

              Mohibur Rashid wrote:

              what were you thinking

              Absolutely nothing. A joke should be taken as a joke. I do it that way. Others have their way of interpreting it.

              Every new day is another chance to change your life.

              N Offline
              N Offline
              Nagy Vilmos
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Jokes are normally funny. Just saying.


              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

              C 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • L Lost User

                That's an awful joke, but it does remind me of Rene Artois from 'Allo 'Allo and his "you stupid woman" line.

                K Offline
                K Offline
                Keith Barrow
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Except, of course, 'Allo 'Allo was funny...

                Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                -Or-
                A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                L 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • K Keith Barrow

                  Except, of course, 'Allo 'Allo was funny...

                  Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                  -Or-
                  A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Yep, one of my all time favorites

                  D 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • L Lost User

                    Yep, one of my all time favorites

                    D Offline
                    D Offline
                    Dalek Dave
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    RENE! Why are you kissing that woman? You stupid woman, I was removing a fish bone from her throat! With your tongue? Well, my hands were dirty!

                    --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • N Nagy Vilmos

                      Jokes are normally funny. Just saying.


                      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                      C Offline
                      C Offline
                      Chandrasekharan P
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Ok. I got your point.

                      Every new day is another chance to change your life.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • D Dalek Dave

                        Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                        A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary.

                        Could you describe this fun? Was it phoning people up and making prank calls, or were they playing poker perhaps?

                        Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                        On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??"

                        I find it hard to believe his wife wouldn't recognise panties, so this story is starting to unravel somewhat.

                        Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                        He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!"

                        Where did this desire for jewellery come from? It hadn't been mentioned before that the wife wanted jewellery, and anyway, couldn't she simply buy her own? Why would she be dependant upon her husband?

                        Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                        She quickly fell on her knees apologizing.

                        I cannot see why she would fall to her knees. Is she used to being beaten, or did he make unreasonable demands for supplication? No woman I know would fall to their knees, and especially not for a simple misunderstanding.

                        Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                        No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

                        Apart from the appalling grammar, it is clear that this line is incorrect. In a court case one side must lose, therefore lawyers are beaten. This tale you tell, it seems rather suspicious, I am inclined to think it is not true, that you have invented it for amusement and yet I find myself, rather like Queen Victoria, strangely unamused. Also, a single exclamation mark is suffice.

                        --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                        C Offline
                        C Offline
                        Chandrasekharan P
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        I wouldn't want to answer of your questions because i just don't feel like. :)

                        Every new day is another chance to change your life.

                        D 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • C Chandrasekharan P

                          I wouldn't want to answer of your questions because i just don't feel like. :)

                          Every new day is another chance to change your life.

                          D Offline
                          D Offline
                          Dalek Dave
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          Any other reasons other than : i) Just don't feel like it. I would have expected... ii)Unable iii)Embarrassed iv)Admittance of unamusing tale etc

                          --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                          C 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • D Dalek Dave

                            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                            A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary.

                            Could you describe this fun? Was it phoning people up and making prank calls, or were they playing poker perhaps?

                            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                            On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??"

                            I find it hard to believe his wife wouldn't recognise panties, so this story is starting to unravel somewhat.

                            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                            He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!"

                            Where did this desire for jewellery come from? It hadn't been mentioned before that the wife wanted jewellery, and anyway, couldn't she simply buy her own? Why would she be dependant upon her husband?

                            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                            She quickly fell on her knees apologizing.

                            I cannot see why she would fall to her knees. Is she used to being beaten, or did he make unreasonable demands for supplication? No woman I know would fall to their knees, and especially not for a simple misunderstanding.

                            Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                            No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

                            Apart from the appalling grammar, it is clear that this line is incorrect. In a court case one side must lose, therefore lawyers are beaten. This tale you tell, it seems rather suspicious, I am inclined to think it is not true, that you have invented it for amusement and yet I find myself, rather like Queen Victoria, strangely unamused. Also, a single exclamation mark is suffice.

                            --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                            P Offline
                            P Offline
                            Pete OHanlon
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Dalek Dave wrote:

                            a single exclamation mark is suffice.

                            *Cough* 1. would suffice or 2. is sufficient

                            *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                            "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                            CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • D Dalek Dave

                              Any other reasons other than : i) Just don't feel like it. I would have expected... ii)Unable iii)Embarrassed iv)Admittance of unamusing tale etc

                              --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                              C Offline
                              C Offline
                              Chandrasekharan P
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              Dalek Dave wrote:

                              I would have expected...
                              ii)Unable
                              iii)Embarrassed
                              iv)Admittance of unamusing tale

                              Excuse me

                              Every new day is another chance to change your life.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • D Dalek Dave

                                Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                                A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary.

                                Could you describe this fun? Was it phoning people up and making prank calls, or were they playing poker perhaps?

                                Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                                On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??"

                                I find it hard to believe his wife wouldn't recognise panties, so this story is starting to unravel somewhat.

                                Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                                He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!"

                                Where did this desire for jewellery come from? It hadn't been mentioned before that the wife wanted jewellery, and anyway, couldn't she simply buy her own? Why would she be dependant upon her husband?

                                Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                                She quickly fell on her knees apologizing.

                                I cannot see why she would fall to her knees. Is she used to being beaten, or did he make unreasonable demands for supplication? No woman I know would fall to their knees, and especially not for a simple misunderstanding.

                                Chandrasekharan P wrote:

                                No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

                                Apart from the appalling grammar, it is clear that this line is incorrect. In a court case one side must lose, therefore lawyers are beaten. This tale you tell, it seems rather suspicious, I am inclined to think it is not true, that you have invented it for amusement and yet I find myself, rather like Queen Victoria, strangely unamused. Also, a single exclamation mark is suffice.

                                --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] English League Tables - Live

                                M Offline
                                M Offline
                                Mohibur Rashid
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                I never knew case like this can be so beneficial

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • C Chandrasekharan P

                                  A Married Lawyer had fun in his car, with his secretary. On getting home his wife observed panties on the back seat, she tore it apart screaming "What is this ??" He calmly replied : "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case, worth a million for me which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted !!" She quickly fell on her knees apologizing. No one wins over a Lawyer! Even something called "A WIFE"!!!

                                  Every new day is another chance to change your life.

                                  P Offline
                                  P Offline
                                  Prasad_Kulkarni
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  :thumbsup: :laugh:

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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