Can anyone explain where the pleasure is in mowing the lawn?
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I had to do it yesterday, and compared to my old hobbies (as in I don't do them any more) I really can't see the point. All you end up with is a large number of bin bags full of short green cr@p you can't eat, drink, smoke, wear or even put in the composter as it's the "wrong type of material" and temporarily slightly shorter green stuff, whjich will be back to normal by the end of the week. And a trip to the tip in a car that smells of rapidly fermenting vegetables. At least with my ex-hobbies of excessive drinking, excessive consumption of illegal narcotics, and riding excessively large motorcycles at excessive speeds on public roads you got something concrete out it: Considerably poorer, a bad headache and a big grin. How the elephanting heck can people actually enjoy this?:confused:
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
Give me 4 hours with ice cold lemonade and good music to tend to the garden any Saturday and I will prefer it over running after the kids to not turn the house into Beirut after a bombing run!
Alberto Bar-Noy --------------- “The city’s central computer told you? R2D2, you know better than to trust a strange computer!” (C3PO)
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You know, I was just thinking the exact same thing yesterday as I was cutting the grass. "The dream of home ownership"?? What Crack smoking moron dreams of spending 4 hours cutting the grass, picking sticks, pulling weeds, and whatever else once or twice a week??
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Dave KreskowiakThis is why you have a) children or b) neighbors who want to earn some money. I found it also helps if you develop an apathetic attitude toward how your yard actual looks; my standard was simply to not have the worse looking lawn in the neighborhood and given some of my neighbors at the time, it wasn't hard. An even better option is to do natural landscaping. Granted, this is generally easier out here in the dry and/or desert climes, but you can accomplish a similar thing in other places. (There are several houses near where I live with very nice non-grass or minimum grass landscaped yards.)
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Although the mower is loud, it creates a kind of cone of silence where kids and spouses can't reach you. If you have a cigar while you mow, so much the better. It's a suburban Zen thing. Bagging sucks tho. I'll spot you that.
Yes! And then there is the toilet and the garage where you can use loud power tools. Sanctuaries for men!
-- Kein Mitleid Für Die Mehrheit
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You've obviously been duped by one too many TV commercials, showing guys riding around on their John Deer riding lawn mowers, using their Husqvarna weed eaters, trimmers and blowers, while wearing manly looking clothes like plaid shirts and military issue boots. These tools are so amazing that they effortlessly turn their yards that once looked like the outback, into the front cover of Homes and Gardens magazine. But the important thing here to remember is this: it's a elephanting TV commercial and it's full of LIES. Mowing the lawn is hard work and you almost always have to do it in 100 degrees of heat, surrounded by insects that haven't eaten anything in months, until you strolled outside, and despite your best effort to keep yourself physically fit, you'll use muscles to push that mower around your yard that you didn't know you had; and actually, you don't, which is why you're body feels like someone's set it on fire when you're done, it's because you're dying. And those great yard tools you dropped half your life savings on? Yea, after you dislocate your shoulder getting them to start, assuming you actually can get them to start, you'll spend the next hour gritting your teeth thru the pain of holding this overweight gas hog, praying that maybe you'll just pass out and die from the obvious malaria infection you've sustained from that mosquito swarm that just plowed thru your yard, using you like a blood filled water balloon. And let's not forget about the torn ligaments in your knee that you're fairly certain you sustained, while pushing that mower thru your yard, right, the one that said it was a "riding" mower, that never actually works right, so you end up having to push it out of the middle of the tallest grass in your yard, back to your garage, so you can get out the crappy mower that you have to constantly restart every two seconds because it can't cut grass taller than 2 inches. Yes sir, mowing the lawn is a manly, enjoyable, relaxing, can't wait to have a cold one when I've turned this mess into Disney Land, experience; and if that's what you honestly think about it, it's because you're actually laying dead in your yard, being eaten by Fire ants.
:..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
Bad Astronomy |VCFYou forgot mowing over the top of a yellow jacket nest and doing "the dance". Also, stepping in fireants. Other than that, I sort of like the exercise.
Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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You forgot mowing over the top of a yellow jacket nest and doing "the dance". Also, stepping in fireants. Other than that, I sort of like the exercise.
Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
You like the exercise uh? Well, I have 1.2 acres of which I have about 3/4 of it cleared, how about you come cut my yard, you'll get plenty of exercise. BTW - I live on a hill and my yard is filled with all kinds of holes, rocks and Raptor bones; at least that's what they look like to me, or maybe that's just the heat stroke talking. And thanks for volunteering like this, I mean, I would have paid you, but since you enjoy the exercise I'm sure you'll gladly do this out of the kindness of heart, after all, if you worked out at a gym that'd cost YOU money and I'm going to let you do this for free! I know, no need to thank me. I'll let the little yellow ninjas of flying death know you'll be playing "tag" with them; They so enjoy a good game of tag. Bring your running shoes, they've up their game this year and now employ GPS to help track their target. ;P
:..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTL -
You've obviously been duped by one too many TV commercials, showing guys riding around on their John Deer riding lawn mowers, using their Husqvarna weed eaters, trimmers and blowers, while wearing manly looking clothes like plaid shirts and military issue boots. These tools are so amazing that they effortlessly turn their yards that once looked like the outback, into the front cover of Homes and Gardens magazine. But the important thing here to remember is this: it's a elephanting TV commercial and it's full of LIES. Mowing the lawn is hard work and you almost always have to do it in 100 degrees of heat, surrounded by insects that haven't eaten anything in months, until you strolled outside, and despite your best effort to keep yourself physically fit, you'll use muscles to push that mower around your yard that you didn't know you had; and actually, you don't, which is why you're body feels like someone's set it on fire when you're done, it's because you're dying. And those great yard tools you dropped half your life savings on? Yea, after you dislocate your shoulder getting them to start, assuming you actually can get them to start, you'll spend the next hour gritting your teeth thru the pain of holding this overweight gas hog, praying that maybe you'll just pass out and die from the obvious malaria infection you've sustained from that mosquito swarm that just plowed thru your yard, using you like a blood filled water balloon. And let's not forget about the torn ligaments in your knee that you're fairly certain you sustained, while pushing that mower thru your yard, right, the one that said it was a "riding" mower, that never actually works right, so you end up having to push it out of the middle of the tallest grass in your yard, back to your garage, so you can get out the crappy mower that you have to constantly restart every two seconds because it can't cut grass taller than 2 inches. Yes sir, mowing the lawn is a manly, enjoyable, relaxing, can't wait to have a cold one when I've turned this mess into Disney Land, experience; and if that's what you honestly think about it, it's because you're actually laying dead in your yard, being eaten by Fire ants.
:..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
Bad Astronomy |VCFMy sole regret is that I only have one 5 to give you for that.
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
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You like the exercise uh? Well, I have 1.2 acres of which I have about 3/4 of it cleared, how about you come cut my yard, you'll get plenty of exercise. BTW - I live on a hill and my yard is filled with all kinds of holes, rocks and Raptor bones; at least that's what they look like to me, or maybe that's just the heat stroke talking. And thanks for volunteering like this, I mean, I would have paid you, but since you enjoy the exercise I'm sure you'll gladly do this out of the kindness of heart, after all, if you worked out at a gym that'd cost YOU money and I'm going to let you do this for free! I know, no need to thank me. I'll let the little yellow ninjas of flying death know you'll be playing "tag" with them; They so enjoy a good game of tag. Bring your running shoes, they've up their game this year and now employ GPS to help track their target. ;P
:..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTLyellow ninjas! I like it. Actually, I've mowed lawns like that before, and I swore never to do it again. So, my backyard is about 1/2 acre with 70% nice grass. We try to keep the dinosaurs out. As my youngest son is 12 now, and he likes cash, most of the time he does it. I have my beverage of choice and point out what he missed ;). The front yard is a mix of mainly bermuda and some misc. weeds. With teenagers driving on the lawn and it facing due South, I don't put much effort into it. but I think I should point out that when I mow MY lawn, I get satisfaction. :)
Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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I had to do it yesterday, and compared to my old hobbies (as in I don't do them any more) I really can't see the point. All you end up with is a large number of bin bags full of short green cr@p you can't eat, drink, smoke, wear or even put in the composter as it's the "wrong type of material" and temporarily slightly shorter green stuff, whjich will be back to normal by the end of the week. And a trip to the tip in a car that smells of rapidly fermenting vegetables. At least with my ex-hobbies of excessive drinking, excessive consumption of illegal narcotics, and riding excessively large motorcycles at excessive speeds on public roads you got something concrete out it: Considerably poorer, a bad headache and a big grin. How the elephanting heck can people actually enjoy this?:confused:
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
I no longer have a lawn but when I did, I rather enjoyed mowing it. Getting those nice looking stripes just right is an art form and a worthy hobby. As to
OriginalGriff wrote:
short green cr@p you can't eat, drink
there are loads of recipes for smoothies if you are determined to consume it. Someone (a goyl, naturally) persuaded me to try one once and I wouldn't recommend it but if you feel it wrong to waste it, then go ahead.
Henry Minute Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?" “I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.” I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus! When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is. Cogito ergo thumb - Sucking my thumb helps me to think.
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I had to do it yesterday, and compared to my old hobbies (as in I don't do them any more) I really can't see the point. All you end up with is a large number of bin bags full of short green cr@p you can't eat, drink, smoke, wear or even put in the composter as it's the "wrong type of material" and temporarily slightly shorter green stuff, whjich will be back to normal by the end of the week. And a trip to the tip in a car that smells of rapidly fermenting vegetables. At least with my ex-hobbies of excessive drinking, excessive consumption of illegal narcotics, and riding excessively large motorcycles at excessive speeds on public roads you got something concrete out it: Considerably poorer, a bad headache and a big grin. How the elephanting heck can people actually enjoy this?:confused:
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
Picture yourself as a giant and the blades of grass, annoying little people. As you run your blades over them, yell, "die scum of the Earth, die!" - bonus points if you take out insects...(just like a 3D video game) :-D Extra bonus: your neighbors will probably not bother you much...
Steve _________________ I C(++) therefore I am
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I had to do it yesterday, and compared to my old hobbies (as in I don't do them any more) I really can't see the point. All you end up with is a large number of bin bags full of short green cr@p you can't eat, drink, smoke, wear or even put in the composter as it's the "wrong type of material" and temporarily slightly shorter green stuff, whjich will be back to normal by the end of the week. And a trip to the tip in a car that smells of rapidly fermenting vegetables. At least with my ex-hobbies of excessive drinking, excessive consumption of illegal narcotics, and riding excessively large motorcycles at excessive speeds on public roads you got something concrete out it: Considerably poorer, a bad headache and a big grin. How the elephanting heck can people actually enjoy this?:confused:
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
Nobody nattering at me. And, even if they were, I can't hear them. If cutting the back, a zillion dragonflies clouding around me snatching up all the smaller insects I've evicted from their homes. If cutting the front, a dozen swallows zooming around snatching up all the insects of whatever size I've evicted from their homes. Randomly, a flock of butterflies come to say Hello.
No dogs or cats are in the classroom. My Mu[sic] My Films My Windows Programs, etc.
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Nobody nattering at me. And, even if they were, I can't hear them. If cutting the back, a zillion dragonflies clouding around me snatching up all the smaller insects I've evicted from their homes. If cutting the front, a dozen swallows zooming around snatching up all the insects of whatever size I've evicted from their homes. Randomly, a flock of butterflies come to say Hello.
No dogs or cats are in the classroom. My Mu[sic] My Films My Windows Programs, etc.
Post video please :)
Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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Post video please :)
Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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Sow Emo grass, it cuts itself. Andy B
That's wicked :laugh:.
Software Zen:
delete this; -
Nobody nattering at me. And, even if they were, I can't hear them. If cutting the back, a zillion dragonflies clouding around me snatching up all the smaller insects I've evicted from their homes. If cutting the front, a dozen swallows zooming around snatching up all the insects of whatever size I've evicted from their homes. Randomly, a flock of butterflies come to say Hello.
No dogs or cats are in the classroom. My Mu[sic] My Films My Windows Programs, etc.
Have you ever considered writing Haiku?
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
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Have you ever considered writing Haiku?
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
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I had to do it yesterday, and compared to my old hobbies (as in I don't do them any more) I really can't see the point. All you end up with is a large number of bin bags full of short green cr@p you can't eat, drink, smoke, wear or even put in the composter as it's the "wrong type of material" and temporarily slightly shorter green stuff, whjich will be back to normal by the end of the week. And a trip to the tip in a car that smells of rapidly fermenting vegetables. At least with my ex-hobbies of excessive drinking, excessive consumption of illegal narcotics, and riding excessively large motorcycles at excessive speeds on public roads you got something concrete out it: Considerably poorer, a bad headache and a big grin. How the elephanting heck can people actually enjoy this?:confused:
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
When I got sick last year I relented and agreed to the Mrs calling in a mower man. For $50 he mowed the 300sq meters of lawn, did all the edges far better than I ever had, cleaned up with his leaf blower and took all the clippings with him. We had him back every week during summer. Life is just too short
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You like the exercise uh? Well, I have 1.2 acres of which I have about 3/4 of it cleared, how about you come cut my yard, you'll get plenty of exercise. BTW - I live on a hill and my yard is filled with all kinds of holes, rocks and Raptor bones; at least that's what they look like to me, or maybe that's just the heat stroke talking. And thanks for volunteering like this, I mean, I would have paid you, but since you enjoy the exercise I'm sure you'll gladly do this out of the kindness of heart, after all, if you worked out at a gym that'd cost YOU money and I'm going to let you do this for free! I know, no need to thank me. I'll let the little yellow ninjas of flying death know you'll be playing "tag" with them; They so enjoy a good game of tag. Bring your running shoes, they've up their game this year and now employ GPS to help track their target. ;P
:..::. Douglas H. Troy ::..
Bad Astronomy |VCF|wxWidgets|WTLHey lazy bones, give me an email when you get the chance!
¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! Personal 3D projects Just Say No to Web 2 Point Blow
