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"The World's Worst Software Developer"

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  • W wizardzz

    Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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    Nueman
    wrote on last edited by
    #28

    "I don't need to comment my code because it is so readable and easy to understand."

    What me worry?

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    • W wizardzz

      Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #29

      I just re-factored the algorithms down to 1 line. Your welcome.

      Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • W wizardzz

        Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

        L Offline
        L Offline
        Lost User
        wrote on last edited by
        #30

        Can we just blame this on the hardware?

        Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • W wizardzz

          Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

          L Offline
          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #31

          All, my code is now checked in but is not compiling. See you when I get back from my week long vaco!

          Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

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          • L Lost User

            "Nah... we don't need to worry about patents!" [Spoken in Korean]

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            Rage
            wrote on last edited by
            #32

            :-D Good reference.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • W wizardzz

              Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

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              A Offline
              Andrew Rissing
              wrote on last edited by
              #33

              "I can program my DVR, how much harder is a computer?"

              J 1 Reply Last reply
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              • L Lost User

                "If only I could understand recursion, I'd be able to understand recursion."

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                Corporal Agarn
                wrote on last edited by
                #34

                Could you repeat that?

                C 1 Reply Last reply
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                • A Andrew Rissing

                  "I write in VB exclusively." J/K! :-) Couldn't help it.

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                  Matt U
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #35

                  I don't recall VB having a character to end each statement so I believe it should be "I write in VB exclusively" :)

                  djj55: Nice but may have a permission problem Pete O'Hanlon: He has my permission to run it.

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                  • A Andrew Rissing

                    "I can program my DVR, how much harder is a computer?"

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                    jesarg
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #36

                    "I can write emails and play solitaire on my computer; how much harder could it be to program it?"

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • W wizardzz

                      Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Rajesh R Subramanian
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #37

                      What debugger?

                      "Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.

                      P 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • W wizardzz

                        Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                        R Offline
                        R Offline
                        R Giskard Reventlov
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #38

                        My head asplode!!! BTW: why are we writing your material for you???

                        "If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me

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                        • R Rage

                          "I build using my plain english compiler". (This is for the dinausors here.)

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                          Rajesh R Subramanian
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #39

                          5 from a Fukuiraptor! :)

                          "Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • W wizardzz

                            Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                            A Offline
                            A Offline
                            Andy Brummer
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #40

                            How do you tell if a number is negative? - I've been asked this by a co-worker in real life.

                            Curvature of the Mind now with 3D

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                            • A Andy Brummer

                              How do you tell if a number is negative? - I've been asked this by a co-worker in real life.

                              Curvature of the Mind now with 3D

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                              A Offline
                              AspDotNetDev
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #41

                              I'm sure you told them of the complexities of dropping down to assembly language to check the sign bit, which can vary depending on the byte ordering and the bit ordering, what number system is used (floating point, two's complement, ones' complement, etc.), the size of numbers on different architectures (e.g., 32-bit, 64-bit) and compilers (e.g., Intel C++, Microsoft C++), and the assembly instruction set supported (e.g., x86, MIPS). It's a very difficult task, you see.

                              Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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                              • A AspDotNetDev

                                I'm sure you told them of the complexities of dropping down to assembly language to check the sign bit, which can vary depending on the byte ordering and the bit ordering, what number system is used (floating point, two's complement, ones' complement, etc.), the size of numbers on different architectures (e.g., 32-bit, 64-bit) and compilers (e.g., Intel C++, Microsoft C++), and the assembly instruction set supported (e.g., x86, MIPS). It's a very difficult task, you see.

                                Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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                                Andrew Rissing
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #42

                                You should for good measure discuss Heisenberg's uncertainty principle too. Once you're measured the value to see if it is negative, you have modified it.

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                                • A Andrew Rissing

                                  You should for good measure discuss Heisenberg's uncertainty principle too. Once you're measured the value to see if it is negative, you have modified it.

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                                  AspDotNetDev
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #43

                                  Oh dear me, how could I forget Heisenberg's uncertainty principle! While I'm at it, I also forgot about multi-threading volatility, and the susceptibility of non-ECC RAM to errors (which is even less severe than errors caused by paged virtual memory)! Certainly, there should be some locking and some replicated values to account for such common occurrences. Oh, and if the system does not include hardware-level prevention of buffer overflows, there may need to be some work done to prevent the sign bit from being overwritten by external programs, of course.

                                  Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

                                  A 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Lost User

                                    "Nah... we don't need to worry about patents!" [Spoken in Korean]

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                                    C Offline
                                    Colin Mullikin
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #44

                                    Mike Mullikin wrote:

                                    Nah... we don't need to worry about patents

                                    I believe what you meant was, "Patents!? We don't need no stinkin' patents!"

                                    The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

                                    L 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • A AspDotNetDev

                                      I'm sure you told them of the complexities of dropping down to assembly language to check the sign bit, which can vary depending on the byte ordering and the bit ordering, what number system is used (floating point, two's complement, ones' complement, etc.), the size of numbers on different architectures (e.g., 32-bit, 64-bit) and compilers (e.g., Intel C++, Microsoft C++), and the assembly instruction set supported (e.g., x86, MIPS). It's a very difficult task, you see.

                                      Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

                                      C Offline
                                      C Offline
                                      Colin Mullikin
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #45

                                      AspDotNetDev wrote:

                                      MIPS

                                      This brings back some bad college memories... :mad:

                                      The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

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                                      • C Colin Mullikin

                                        AspDotNetDev wrote:

                                        MIPS

                                        This brings back some bad college memories... :mad:

                                        The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

                                        A Offline
                                        A Offline
                                        AspDotNetDev
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #46

                                        College is the only reason I am familiar with MIPS. :)

                                        Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • W wizardzz

                                          Based on some feedback, I will be mixing in other games with 185. Or do you guys want it in addition to daily 185? Either way, here's a new one. It's called "World's Worst." It's a one liner game, so really try to keep them as one liners. And DO NOT copy and paste a joke, or retell a joke, it won't be funny and on stage, you'd get called out. I'll reply with a couple to get started. Keep in mind, references to others tend to gets high points. If anyone is still struggling to grasp it, here's a version from the World's Worst TV show: [^] "The World's Worst Software Developer"

                                          L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          Lost User
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #47

                                          My Project is really Service Oriented because I have 10 Web Service in it!

                                          Meysam

                                          W Z 2 Replies Last reply
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