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The occasional flash of brilliance

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Weird and The Wonderful
csharpcomadobealgorithmstools
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  • enhzflepE enhzflep

    Where do I send the bill for monitor cleaning? :-D There goes that mouthful of coffee. :-\ You know, I might just try that next time for a laugh. No actually, that's starting to seem funnier and funnier (no doubt they've seen responses something like that before) I will try that next time. I'll just give a fake name and try to get em to send a Western Union. Sure I can't have it, but they've lost it by then anyway.. I'll gladly accept the idea in lieu of the screen-cleaning $$. :laugh:

    Make it work. Then do it better - Andrei Straut

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #6

    Thank you, Mr. Scammer, you are my last hope. The bridges here at the polar circle are very cold and drafty and I will probably not survive the coming winter. By your message I can see that you also have encountered hard times, so I'm more than willing to help. Unfortunately the banks here will not let homeless people open a bank account unless a minimum deposit of 500$ is made. If you can help me over this obstacle, we can then quickly see to bringing your money to safety. (I hope the monitor survived the next shower) :)

    enhzflepE F R 3 Replies Last reply
    0
    • L Lost User

      Thank you, Mr. Scammer, you are my last hope. The bridges here at the polar circle are very cold and drafty and I will probably not survive the coming winter. By your message I can see that you also have encountered hard times, so I'm more than willing to help. Unfortunately the banks here will not let homeless people open a bank account unless a minimum deposit of 500$ is made. If you can help me over this obstacle, we can then quickly see to bringing your money to safety. (I hope the monitor survived the next shower) :)

      enhzflepE Offline
      enhzflepE Offline
      enhzflep
      wrote on last edited by
      #7

      For some reason that still reminds me of the sketch whereby someone was rung at home by a telemarketer. He apologised and said that unfortunately he was very busy, thanked them for the call and asked for their home number so he could call back later to discuss it further at a time it was convenient. They resisted and resisted until finally he asked "Oh, I guess you don't like people calling you at home then?" - the answer was clearly affirmative, before he retorted "Yeah well, I'm at home right now!" (it was Seinfeld) I did that to a company trying to sell water-coolers once. The sound of the girl's voice after I did the same thing was priceless. I still get a giggle from time-to-time about it now, some 15 years later. I'll be sure to report back here with any ensuing hilarity. Thanks for the idea.:thumbsup: Edit: meant to say the monitor's fine, it's just the front of these shorts that suffered..

      Make it work. Then do it better - Andrei Straut

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      • L Lost User

        Thank you, Mr. Scammer, you are my last hope. The bridges here at the polar circle are very cold and drafty and I will probably not survive the coming winter. By your message I can see that you also have encountered hard times, so I'm more than willing to help. Unfortunately the banks here will not let homeless people open a bank account unless a minimum deposit of 500$ is made. If you can help me over this obstacle, we can then quickly see to bringing your money to safety. (I hope the monitor survived the next shower) :)

        F Offline
        F Offline
        Florin Jurcovici
        wrote on last edited by
        #8

        Makes no sense - you're not falling into their core demographics - extremely gullible people but which _do_ have some money. OTOH, giving out a real account number cannot harm you - no bank will make payments from your account without some sort of proof that you authorized the payment - such as a signed payment order or an electronically authenticated transfer, so your account should be safe as long as you don't pass confidential info on to the scammer.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • L Lost User

          Thank you, Mr. Scammer, you are my last hope. The bridges here at the polar circle are very cold and drafty and I will probably not survive the coming winter. By your message I can see that you also have encountered hard times, so I'm more than willing to help. Unfortunately the banks here will not let homeless people open a bank account unless a minimum deposit of 500$ is made. If you can help me over this obstacle, we can then quickly see to bringing your money to safety. (I hope the monitor survived the next shower) :)

          R Offline
          R Offline
          Reelix
          wrote on last edited by
          #9

          You'll love this site :p http://www.419eater.com/[^]

          -= Reelix =-

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          • L Lost User

            This piece of spam is the most inspiring piece I have seen in a while. The sheer complexity, the audacity, the eloquence;

            M.FISH *somefool*@midohio.twcbc.com

            to undisclosed recipients
            Congratulations you Email ID have won 700,000 GBP from Chevrolet motors.
            fill the information and send back for processing

            1Name....

            2Address....

            3Telephone Number...

            4Sex..:

            5Age...

            1. Current City....:

            2. Occupation

            Bank Name....:

            Account Name....:

            Account Number....:

            Bank Address

            Today, the spammers think I'm an idiot.

            Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: if you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #10

            You give away most of that information every time you write a check. If you're wearing your McDonald's outfit when you write the check, they've got all of it.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • L Lost User

              Why don't we turn the table on them? Send back a reply that you live under a bridge and are responding with a stolen phone. You could sure use the money they promise you and would gladly help. Unfortunately you can't open a bank account without a minimum deposit of (pick a suitable amount). Perhaps there are gullible scammers as well. :) Edit: What kind of person could be upset enough to downvote this? Anyway, a nice 'good morning' goes to Nigeria today! :)

              D Offline
              D Offline
              Dan Neely
              wrote on last edited by
              #11

              It's worth a try. A friend of mine managed to talk a spammer into sending him a check years ago. It was a real Bank of Something or Other cashiers check. (A check that was part of a stolen shipment of blanks and was filled out by the spammer not the bank; but nonetheless it was a real check.) :laugh:

              Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason? Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful? --Zachris Topelius Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies. -- Sarah Hoyt

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • L Lost User

                This piece of spam is the most inspiring piece I have seen in a while. The sheer complexity, the audacity, the eloquence;

                M.FISH *somefool*@midohio.twcbc.com

                to undisclosed recipients
                Congratulations you Email ID have won 700,000 GBP from Chevrolet motors.
                fill the information and send back for processing

                1Name....

                2Address....

                3Telephone Number...

                4Sex..:

                5Age...

                1. Current City....:

                2. Occupation

                Bank Name....:

                Account Name....:

                Account Number....:

                Bank Address

                Today, the spammers think I'm an idiot.

                Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: if you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]

                V Offline
                V Offline
                VE2
                wrote on last edited by
                #12

                Just a note...when you write a check the recipient has all the bank account info including account name and number etc.

                73

                L 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • V VE2

                  Just a note...when you write a check the recipient has all the bank account info including account name and number etc.

                  73

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #13

                  It's hard to believe anyone would write a check based on this mail, but apparently some are gullible enough.

                  Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: if you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • L Lost User

                    Why don't we turn the table on them? Send back a reply that you live under a bridge and are responding with a stolen phone. You could sure use the money they promise you and would gladly help. Unfortunately you can't open a bank account without a minimum deposit of (pick a suitable amount). Perhaps there are gullible scammers as well. :) Edit: What kind of person could be upset enough to downvote this? Anyway, a nice 'good morning' goes to Nigeria today! :)

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    Sasha Laurel
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #14

                    I think its a good idea. I will sometimes waste a little bit of time and ask them to forward the routing # and account # where I can pick up the money. I tell them that I don't disclose any information over email. I have yet to hear back, but I guess there is a certain amount of personal satisfaction anyway.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • L Lost User

                      Why don't we turn the table on them? Send back a reply that you live under a bridge and are responding with a stolen phone. You could sure use the money they promise you and would gladly help. Unfortunately you can't open a bank account without a minimum deposit of (pick a suitable amount). Perhaps there are gullible scammers as well. :) Edit: What kind of person could be upset enough to downvote this? Anyway, a nice 'good morning' goes to Nigeria today! :)

                      P Offline
                      P Offline
                      patbob
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #15

                      CDP1802 wrote:

                      Perhaps there are gullible scammers as well. :)

                      We just need a source of guaranteed-to-be-fake account and routing numbers we can use to reply with. Or.. [snicker] the account and routing numbers of other scammers (Ok, that last bit's a joke because it would be breaking the law, but it would be funny). Heck, maybe interpol could hook the false account numbers up to a trap that automatically freezes the assets of the money's destination.

                      We can program with only 1's, but if all you've got are zeros, you've got nothing.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • enhzflepE enhzflep

                        Where do I send the bill for monitor cleaning? :-D There goes that mouthful of coffee. :-\ You know, I might just try that next time for a laugh. No actually, that's starting to seem funnier and funnier (no doubt they've seen responses something like that before) I will try that next time. I'll just give a fake name and try to get em to send a Western Union. Sure I can't have it, but they've lost it by then anyway.. I'll gladly accept the idea in lieu of the screen-cleaning $$. :laugh:

                        Make it work. Then do it better - Andrei Straut

                        K Offline
                        K Offline
                        KP Lee
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #16

                        The only problem with replying with anything is that you establish that your e-mail is valid and active. This will be distributed to other spammers that they've found an idiot and your spam mail will increase 10-fold

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • L Lost User

                          Why don't we turn the table on them? Send back a reply that you live under a bridge and are responding with a stolen phone. You could sure use the money they promise you and would gladly help. Unfortunately you can't open a bank account without a minimum deposit of (pick a suitable amount). Perhaps there are gullible scammers as well. :) Edit: What kind of person could be upset enough to downvote this? Anyway, a nice 'good morning' goes to Nigeria today! :)

                          M Offline
                          M Offline
                          Marco Bertschi
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #17

                          Seems like some nigerian jerks are trying to downvote your post :laugh:

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