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Code Project
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  3. My Joke Of The Day

My Joke Of The Day

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  • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

    You gotta think these Evil Plans through...

    If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #16

    Will you teach me how to be evil?

    OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • N Nagy Vilmos

      I have perfected the Dry Martini - four parts gin, then wave the glass in the direction of Italy.


      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #17

      [MehGerbil votes alcohol abuse]

      N 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • L Lost User

        Will you teach me how to be evil?

        OriginalGriffO Offline
        OriginalGriffO Offline
        OriginalGriff
        wrote on last edited by
        #18

        You're going to need some equipment: 1) A cat. 2) A Secret Volcano Base. Give me a yell when you have them both.

        If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

        "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
        "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

        N 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • L Lost User

          [MehGerbil votes alcohol abuse]

          N Offline
          N Offline
          Nagy Vilmos
          wrote on last edited by
          #19

          How can non-dilution be abuse?:confused:


          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

          L 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • L Lost User

            I'll cry if you do.

            Mike HankeyM Offline
            Mike HankeyM Offline
            Mike Hankey
            wrote on last edited by
            #20

            Group hug. :)

            VS2010/Atmel Studio 6.0 ToDo Manager Extension
            Version 3.0 now available. There is no place like 127.0.0.1

            C M 2 Replies Last reply
            0
            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

              You're going to need some equipment: 1) A cat. 2) A Secret Volcano Base. Give me a yell when you have them both.

              If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

              N Offline
              N Offline
              Nagy Vilmos
              wrote on last edited by
              #21

              We've seen your pussy, but what about your rocks?


              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

              OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • L Lost User

                Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Orange you glad I didn't say apple again? Go ahead. Downvote me for a bad joke. LOL! I win.

                K Offline
                K Offline
                Keith Barrow
                wrote on last edited by
                #22

                Others are bookmarking you now. Personally, I'm just going to go on a random univoting spree once it is back up and running. Not entirely random of course, here is my hitlist[^] ;P

                Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                -Or-
                A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                L 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • K Keith Barrow

                  Others are bookmarking you now. Personally, I'm just going to go on a random univoting spree once it is back up and running. Not entirely random of course, here is my hitlist[^] ;P

                  Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                  -Or-
                  A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #23

                  Yeah, well you obviously share the same hitlist with about half the people here. However, for now I have free reign to abuse as I see fit. You are a poo-poo head. *evil laugh*

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                    How can non-dilution be abuse?:confused:


                    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                    L Offline
                    L Offline
                    Lost User
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #24

                    I attended public school in the USA. Your references to chemistry have confused me.

                    N 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • L Lost User

                      I attended public school in the USA. Your references to chemistry have confused me.

                      N Offline
                      N Offline
                      Nagy Vilmos
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #25

                      Public or not, your downfall was going to a Septic School.


                      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                        Group hug. :)

                        VS2010/Atmel Studio 6.0 ToDo Manager Extension
                        Version 3.0 now available. There is no place like 127.0.0.1

                        C Offline
                        C Offline
                        Corporal Agarn
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #26

                        MIND BLEACH!

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • N Nagy Vilmos

                          I have perfected the Dry Martini - four parts gin, then wave the glass in the direction of Italy.


                          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                          J Offline
                          J Offline
                          Jorgen Andersson
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #27

                          You forgot the olive on the side. And it should be France, really[^]. The Vermouth you don't use should be the best.

                          People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L Lost User

                            Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Orange you glad I didn't say apple again? Go ahead. Downvote me for a bad joke. LOL! I win.

                            L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Lost User
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #28

                            Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Here, have my money. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Here, have my money. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Here, have my money. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Haven't I already given you money several times without getting anything else? NON-BELIEVER! Sorry, here, have my money. Knock Knock...

                            Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

                            L 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • N Nagy Vilmos

                              We've seen your pussy, but what about your rocks?


                              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                              OriginalGriffO Offline
                              OriginalGriffO Offline
                              OriginalGriff
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #29

                              Shh! It's a secret

                              If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                              "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                              "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • L Lost User

                                Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Here, have my money. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Here, have my money. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Here, have my money. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Haven't I already given you money several times without getting anything else? NON-BELIEVER! Sorry, here, have my money. Knock Knock...

                                Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                Lost User
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #30

                                You'd have probably gotten about 10 upvotes for this on a regular day. The no-voting policy is costing you big.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • L Lost User

                                  Collin Jasnoch wrote:

                                  It being a bad joke is one thing.. But you did not even tell it corectly:~

                                  Someone call a WAAAAAAMBULANCE. ^ Oh look, I can be rude now as well. :-D Yes people, at teh Code Project we now have total freedom!

                                  M Offline
                                  M Offline
                                  Marco Bertschi
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #31

                                  MehGerbil wrote:

                                  Yes people, at teh Code Project we now have total freedom!

                                  Chris Maunder is still able kick you out I suppose. Or this function has a bug too which would be good on the one side (free speech including harassing, blaming posts about your boss, beer-addicted smokers as I am one, your friends wife et cetera) and bad on the other side (Where to go with the sockpuppets?).

                                  MehGerbil wrote:

                                  Someone call a WAAAAAAMBULANCE.

                                  :thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup: Have virtual 5 up for this.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Lost User

                                    Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Apple. Knock Knock. Who is there? Orange you glad I didn't say apple again? Go ahead. Downvote me for a bad joke. LOL! I win.

                                    M Offline
                                    M Offline
                                    Marco Bertschi
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #32

                                    Bookmarked. :suss:Evil Laughter :suss:

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                      Group hug. :)

                                      VS2010/Atmel Studio 6.0 ToDo Manager Extension
                                      Version 3.0 now available. There is no place like 127.0.0.1

                                      M Offline
                                      M Offline
                                      Marco Bertschi
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #33

                                      I participate.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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