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Cat Advice

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  • N Offline
    N Offline
    Nagy Vilmos
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

    OriginalGriffO P B A D 7 Replies Last reply
    0
    • N Nagy Vilmos

      Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

      OriginalGriffO Offline
      OriginalGriffO Offline
      OriginalGriff
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      It's the lacerations for you I'm afraid. The RSPCA and I both take a did few of cat roasts. However, you could always use plan "B" - leave the door open for a few hours - it will find it's own way out. Or a Badger will run in and join it... :laugh:

      If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

      "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
      "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

      N I S 3 Replies Last reply
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      • N Nagy Vilmos

        Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


        Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

        P Offline
        P Offline
        Pete OHanlon
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Neither - you move the shed to ChrisElston's allotment and let his local council take care of it.

        *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

        "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

        CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

        L 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • N Nagy Vilmos

          Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

          B Offline
          B Offline
          Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          if you burn the shed who will murder these demons you refer to? wait a minute, 21 dec = end of world! Nagy having demon muderer locked in shed! world destroyed by demons! and its all Nagy's fault

          You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

          B 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • P Pete OHanlon

            Neither - you move the shed to ChrisElston's allotment and let his local council take care of it.

            *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

            "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

            CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Nice :-D Not that we've heard anything since October, and the sheds are still up.

            Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

            B 1 Reply Last reply
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            • N Nagy Vilmos

              Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

              A Offline
              A Offline
              Andy_L_J
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              I have rung the Fire Brigade for you :-D

              I don't speak Idiot - please talk slowly and clearly "I have sexdaily. I mean dyslexia. Fcuk!" Driven to the arms of Heineken by the wife

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • L Lost User

                Nice :-D Not that we've heard anything since October, and the sheds are still up.

                Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

                B Offline
                B Offline
                Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Chris, what calender are you using there as here it is December

                You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

                L 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • B Bergholt Stuttley Johnson

                  Chris, what calender are you using there as here it is December

                  You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Some prat let my brain out on its own again.

                  Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                    Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


                    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                    D Offline
                    D Offline
                    Dalek Dave
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    So your shed is now a Cat House? Does your wife know?

                    --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^]

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                      It's the lacerations for you I'm afraid. The RSPCA and I both take a did few of cat roasts. However, you could always use plan "B" - leave the door open for a few hours - it will find it's own way out. Or a Badger will run in and join it... :laugh:

                      If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                      N Offline
                      N Offline
                      Nagy Vilmos
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      I've left the door open for the last two hours. I now have three dead badgers on the lawn and I think the cat has mined the door to the shed.


                      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • N Nagy Vilmos

                        Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


                        Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                        M Offline
                        M Offline
                        Marco Bertschi
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                        Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?

                        I recommend a flamethrower to burn the shed down. If you want to get the beast out alive and without scratches on you I recommend a garden hose or if it is still there after the garden hose you can upgrade to a firefighter hose. Afterwards you may have to use a water cannon which you may be able to borrow at your local police department.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • N Nagy Vilmos

                          Stupid moggy! One of the neighbourhood cats has got itself into my shed. Now it must have got in there yesterday when I was getting the Christmas decorations out and left the door open. The daft fur ball has knocked over lots of empty boxes and is under the debris. Now for the problem. Do I try to get the flee ridden git out at the risk of being scratched and bitten or do I just burn the whole thing down and bid good riddance to the demonic murderer?


                          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Roger Wright
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          That's a quandary - rat traps are too small, and a shotgun is too noisy. Good luck!

                          Will Rogers never met me.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • B Bergholt Stuttley Johnson

                            if you burn the shed who will murder these demons you refer to? wait a minute, 21 dec = end of world! Nagy having demon muderer locked in shed! world destroyed by demons! and its all Nagy's fault

                            You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

                            B Offline
                            B Offline
                            bVagadishnu
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Bergholt Stuttley Johnson wrote:

                            wait a minute, 21 dec = end of world!

                            but 25 Dec = 31 Oct :omg:

                            Schenectady? What am I doing in Schenectady?

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                              It's the lacerations for you I'm afraid. The RSPCA and I both take a did few of cat roasts. However, you could always use plan "B" - leave the door open for a few hours - it will find it's own way out. Or a Badger will run in and join it... :laugh:

                              If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                              I Offline
                              I Offline
                              ian dennis 0
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              I agree with the RSPCA, ASPCA (in USA), Griff ... and Bast

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                It's the lacerations for you I'm afraid. The RSPCA and I both take a did few of cat roasts. However, you could always use plan "B" - leave the door open for a few hours - it will find it's own way out. Or a Badger will run in and join it... :laugh:

                                If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                                S Offline
                                S Offline
                                SockPuppeteer
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                OriginalGriff wrote:

                                take a did few

                                Do you have a code id da dose?

                                .\\axxx

                                OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • S SockPuppeteer

                                  OriginalGriff wrote:

                                  take a did few

                                  Do you have a code id da dose?

                                  .\\axxx

                                  OriginalGriffO Offline
                                  OriginalGriffO Offline
                                  OriginalGriff
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  Do, I hade a cold id de keyboard...

                                  If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                                  "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                                  "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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