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Work Weirdo's

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  • J Jimmy Savile

    We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

    OriginalGriffO Offline
    OriginalGriffO Offline
    OriginalGriff
    wrote on last edited by
    #3

    I work for myself, so it's me, I'm afraid - I'm the weirdo....

    If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

    "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
    "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

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    • P Pete OHanlon

      Jimmy Savile wrote:

      What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here.

      It would be unfair of me to single out any of the underlings as they are all quite "normal". I have no doubt that they view me as the weirdo - and rightly so - my particular eccentricity being to quote from 70s and 80s rock and metal, as well as quoting vast chunks of H2G2 or Python.

      I was brought up to respect my elders. I don't respect many people nowadays.
      CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

      D Offline
      D Offline
      Dalek Dave
      wrote on last edited by
      #4

      If one cannot quote Python verbatim, one has no business being sat in front of a computer.

      --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^]

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      • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

        I work for myself, so it's me, I'm afraid - I'm the weirdo....

        If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

        N Offline
        N Offline
        Nagy Vilmos
        wrote on last edited by
        #5

        What ever you do, you are outstanding in your field. Or is that out standing...


        Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

        OriginalGriffO K 2 Replies Last reply
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        • N Nagy Vilmos

          What ever you do, you are outstanding in your field. Or is that out standing...


          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriff
          wrote on last edited by
          #6

          I do win "employee of the month" nearly every month. :-\

          If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

          "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
          "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

          S 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • D Dalek Dave

            If one cannot quote Python verbatim, one has no business being sat in front of a computer.

            --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^]

            P Offline
            P Offline
            Pete OHanlon
            wrote on last edited by
            #7

            An aphorism to live by.

            I was brought up to respect my elders. I don't respect many people nowadays.
            CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

              I work for myself, so it's me, I'm afraid - I'm the weirdo....

              If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

              J Offline
              J Offline
              Jimmy Savile
              wrote on last edited by
              #8

              Well i knew it wasn't the cat.

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • J Jimmy Savile

                We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                S Offline
                S Offline
                S Houghtelin
                wrote on last edited by
                #9

                All the weirdos I know are in my wife's family... I guess that makes me the weirdo; well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck. I better quit before I get to someone who’s a CP member. They're not weird they're just, different.

                It was broke, so I fixed it.

                J B 2 Replies Last reply
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                • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                  I do win "employee of the month" nearly every month. :-\

                  If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                  S Offline
                  S Offline
                  S Houghtelin
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #10

                  The cat gets the other months? :-D

                  It was broke, so I fixed it.

                  OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • S S Houghtelin

                    The cat gets the other months? :-D

                    It was broke, so I fixed it.

                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                    OriginalGriffO Offline
                    OriginalGriff
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #11

                    The cat, or the pencil sharpener, yes. :sigh:

                    If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                    "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
                    "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

                    S 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • S S Houghtelin

                      All the weirdos I know are in my wife's family... I guess that makes me the weirdo; well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck. I better quit before I get to someone who’s a CP member. They're not weird they're just, different.

                      It was broke, so I fixed it.

                      J Offline
                      J Offline
                      Jimmy Savile
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #12

                      S Houghtelin wrote:

                      well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck.

                      Do you work in Toy Story?

                      S 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                        The cat, or the pencil sharpener, yes. :sigh:

                        If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                        S Offline
                        S Offline
                        S Houghtelin
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #13

                        Must be a dandy of a pencil sharpener! Or it just has a better attitude than the cat. I have two cats that have tempted me on a few occasions to toss them outside for a month or two.

                        It was broke, so I fixed it.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • J Jimmy Savile

                          S Houghtelin wrote:

                          well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck.

                          Do you work in Toy Story?

                          S Offline
                          S Offline
                          S Houghtelin
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #14

                          Jimmy Savile wrote:

                          Do you work in Toy Story?

                          Now that you mention it... :^)

                          It was broke, so I fixed it.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • J Jimmy Savile

                            We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                            S Offline
                            S Offline
                            Simon_Whale
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #15

                            Where I work, I sit opposite a chap when he swings his legs back and forth he looks like something that a dog does to your leg!

                            Lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with a Mornay sauce, served in a Provençale manner with shallots and aubergines, garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried egg on top and Spam - Monty Python Spam Sketch

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • J Jimmy Savile

                              We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                              M Offline
                              M Offline
                              Matthew Faithfull
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #16

                              At the moment it's only me but as a contractor I've worked with some characters, OCD and hypersensativity mostly, the occasional freezer gnome, one or two schitzos, international socialist revolutionaries, dishonest Canadians, Brixton hard men, frighteningly clever Indians, Geordie PE teacher... Everyone one of as lovely as can be of course. The strangest tale I've ever heard of wierdness in the IT workplace though is the one about the phantom log layer but we'd better not get into that in the lounge X|

                              "The secret of happiness is freedom, and the secret of freedom, courage." Thucydides (B.C. 460-400)

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • J Jimmy Savile

                                We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                R Offline
                                R Offline
                                Rajesh R Subramanian
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #17

                                There's this one guy who single-handedly empties the soft drinks in the pantry. No matter when you pass across his desk, you'll see several empty bottles of pepsi, coke, and whatever else was available in the fridge. The guy carries something like 3 or 4 bottles to his desk at once.

                                "Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.

                                J 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • J Jimmy Savile

                                  We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                  D Offline
                                  D Offline
                                  derek9999
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #18

                                  Jimmy Savile wrote:

                                  He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition

                                  I have ten of these of top of my machine, none of them rotten though admittedly the kiwi fruit doesn't look too attractive. The exhaust air from my pcs dries them out nicely. I found one under my desk the day I started work and I still have it 14 year later.

                                  Like developing Commodore software? CBM prg Studio

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • J Jimmy Savile

                                    We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                    M Offline
                                    M Offline
                                    Mark_Wallace
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #19

                                    Jimmy Savile wrote:

                                    P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                    Oh, bugger.

                                    I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • R Rajesh R Subramanian

                                      There's this one guy who single-handedly empties the soft drinks in the pantry. No matter when you pass across his desk, you'll see several empty bottles of pepsi, coke, and whatever else was available in the fridge. The guy carries something like 3 or 4 bottles to his desk at once.

                                      "Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.

                                      J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      Jimmy Savile
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #20

                                      is he fat by any chance? If he isn't yet he will be.

                                      R 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • J Jimmy Savile

                                        We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                        P Offline
                                        P Offline
                                        peterchen
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #21

                                        All weirdos around here! When I enter the room, they look away and start to whisper only behind my back. They are probably socially dyfunctional or something.

                                        ORDER BY what user wants

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                                        • J Jimmy Savile

                                          We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                          L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          Lost User
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #22

                                          I'm not sure we have anyone here who is an out and out weirdo. Just your run of the mill oddities that can probably be found anywhere. A lot of them have been here a long time and there is a strangeness that comes over all who have settled into the same groove for many, many years. Last place I worked I'll have a go at. PT - Supposed development manager, complete social inadequate. Lived on his own, living room was a single chair, a projector and screen, with games consoles and freeview box linked to it. Once turned up late to a meeting because he had been watching Pokemon. Once said he had had Smarties cereal for breakfast, when challenged "I didn't know they made a cereal" replied "It was just a bowl of Smarties". Got the job because he had been there since the start. One of the main reasons I left. ***EDIT - Sorry, Smarties cereal was IT Crowd, he said Skittles, and this was several years before The IT Crowd. Yes, he was that much of a cliche. AM - Started out as a 16 year old, mum knew the IT Director. Very smart, very capable, extremely intense. Got sacked for shagging the 15 year old work experience girl who was also the daughter of the HR manager. They remained in a relationship for over 4 years. Recently saw him again (7 year later) working in MacDonalds. Can't remember his name - didn't turn up one day, then the police did and took a load of computers away. Now in prison. TB - known as monkey since he turned up one day in a jumper that looked like this fella[^]. Once deleted a directory of source code by mistake; this led to the introduction of SCM. Once moved a directory of source code to a different directory by mistake. Once drove into one of the 4 foot high boulders used for traffic management on the site whilst waving good bye to someone, hit it square in the middle of the front bumper and put a V shape into the car, writing it off. Once went into town at lunchtime, when got back to car it wouldn't unlock. Phone breakdown, when they got there discovered he had been using his wife's keys to get in (not sure why he had them), his keys were in the other pocket. Once driving to work when his puppy jumped out of the car window at 60mph. It rolled down the road and was apparently unharmed. I could go on and on to be honest. J can't remember his surname - completely dominated by his

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