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Work Weirdo's

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  • D Dalek Dave

    If one cannot quote Python verbatim, one has no business being sat in front of a computer.

    --------------------------------- I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^]

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    Pete OHanlon
    wrote on last edited by
    #7

    An aphorism to live by.

    I was brought up to respect my elders. I don't respect many people nowadays.
    CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

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    • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

      I work for myself, so it's me, I'm afraid - I'm the weirdo....

      If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

      J Offline
      J Offline
      Jimmy Savile
      wrote on last edited by
      #8

      Well i knew it wasn't the cat.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • J Jimmy Savile

        We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

        S Offline
        S Offline
        S Houghtelin
        wrote on last edited by
        #9

        All the weirdos I know are in my wife's family... I guess that makes me the weirdo; well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck. I better quit before I get to someone who’s a CP member. They're not weird they're just, different.

        It was broke, so I fixed it.

        J B 2 Replies Last reply
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        • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

          I do win "employee of the month" nearly every month. :-\

          If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

          S Offline
          S Offline
          S Houghtelin
          wrote on last edited by
          #10

          The cat gets the other months? :-D

          It was broke, so I fixed it.

          OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
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          • S S Houghtelin

            The cat gets the other months? :-D

            It was broke, so I fixed it.

            OriginalGriffO Offline
            OriginalGriffO Offline
            OriginalGriff
            wrote on last edited by
            #11

            The cat, or the pencil sharpener, yes. :sigh:

            If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

            "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
            "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

            S 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • S S Houghtelin

              All the weirdos I know are in my wife's family... I guess that makes me the weirdo; well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck. I better quit before I get to someone who’s a CP member. They're not weird they're just, different.

              It was broke, so I fixed it.

              J Offline
              J Offline
              Jimmy Savile
              wrote on last edited by
              #12

              S Houghtelin wrote:

              well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck.

              Do you work in Toy Story?

              S 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                The cat, or the pencil sharpener, yes. :sigh:

                If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tinned pork then just delete it. It's Spam.

                S Offline
                S Offline
                S Houghtelin
                wrote on last edited by
                #13

                Must be a dandy of a pencil sharpener! Or it just has a better attitude than the cat. I have two cats that have tempted me on a few occasions to toss them outside for a month or two.

                It was broke, so I fixed it.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • J Jimmy Savile

                  S Houghtelin wrote:

                  well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck.

                  Do you work in Toy Story?

                  S Offline
                  S Offline
                  S Houghtelin
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #14

                  Jimmy Savile wrote:

                  Do you work in Toy Story?

                  Now that you mention it... :^)

                  It was broke, so I fixed it.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • J Jimmy Savile

                    We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    Simon_Whale
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #15

                    Where I work, I sit opposite a chap when he swings his legs back and forth he looks like something that a dog does to your leg!

                    Lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with a Mornay sauce, served in a Provençale manner with shallots and aubergines, garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried egg on top and Spam - Monty Python Spam Sketch

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • J Jimmy Savile

                      We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                      M Offline
                      M Offline
                      Matthew Faithfull
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #16

                      At the moment it's only me but as a contractor I've worked with some characters, OCD and hypersensativity mostly, the occasional freezer gnome, one or two schitzos, international socialist revolutionaries, dishonest Canadians, Brixton hard men, frighteningly clever Indians, Geordie PE teacher... Everyone one of as lovely as can be of course. The strangest tale I've ever heard of wierdness in the IT workplace though is the one about the phantom log layer but we'd better not get into that in the lounge X|

                      "The secret of happiness is freedom, and the secret of freedom, courage." Thucydides (B.C. 460-400)

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • J Jimmy Savile

                        We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                        R Offline
                        R Offline
                        Rajesh R Subramanian
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #17

                        There's this one guy who single-handedly empties the soft drinks in the pantry. No matter when you pass across his desk, you'll see several empty bottles of pepsi, coke, and whatever else was available in the fridge. The guy carries something like 3 or 4 bottles to his desk at once.

                        "Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.

                        J 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • J Jimmy Savile

                          We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

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                          D Offline
                          derek9999
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #18

                          Jimmy Savile wrote:

                          He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition

                          I have ten of these of top of my machine, none of them rotten though admittedly the kiwi fruit doesn't look too attractive. The exhaust air from my pcs dries them out nicely. I found one under my desk the day I started work and I still have it 14 year later.

                          Like developing Commodore software? CBM prg Studio

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • J Jimmy Savile

                            We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                            M Offline
                            M Offline
                            Mark_Wallace
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #19

                            Jimmy Savile wrote:

                            P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                            Oh, bugger.

                            I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • R Rajesh R Subramanian

                              There's this one guy who single-handedly empties the soft drinks in the pantry. No matter when you pass across his desk, you'll see several empty bottles of pepsi, coke, and whatever else was available in the fridge. The guy carries something like 3 or 4 bottles to his desk at once.

                              "Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.

                              J Offline
                              J Offline
                              Jimmy Savile
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #20

                              is he fat by any chance? If he isn't yet he will be.

                              R 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • J Jimmy Savile

                                We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                Lost User
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #21

                                I'm not sure we have anyone here who is an out and out weirdo. Just your run of the mill oddities that can probably be found anywhere. A lot of them have been here a long time and there is a strangeness that comes over all who have settled into the same groove for many, many years. Last place I worked I'll have a go at. PT - Supposed development manager, complete social inadequate. Lived on his own, living room was a single chair, a projector and screen, with games consoles and freeview box linked to it. Once turned up late to a meeting because he had been watching Pokemon. Once said he had had Smarties cereal for breakfast, when challenged "I didn't know they made a cereal" replied "It was just a bowl of Smarties". Got the job because he had been there since the start. One of the main reasons I left. ***EDIT - Sorry, Smarties cereal was IT Crowd, he said Skittles, and this was several years before The IT Crowd. Yes, he was that much of a cliche. AM - Started out as a 16 year old, mum knew the IT Director. Very smart, very capable, extremely intense. Got sacked for shagging the 15 year old work experience girl who was also the daughter of the HR manager. They remained in a relationship for over 4 years. Recently saw him again (7 year later) working in MacDonalds. Can't remember his name - didn't turn up one day, then the police did and took a load of computers away. Now in prison. TB - known as monkey since he turned up one day in a jumper that looked like this fella[^]. Once deleted a directory of source code by mistake; this led to the introduction of SCM. Once moved a directory of source code to a different directory by mistake. Once drove into one of the 4 foot high boulders used for traffic management on the site whilst waving good bye to someone, hit it square in the middle of the front bumper and put a V shape into the car, writing it off. Once went into town at lunchtime, when got back to car it wouldn't unlock. Phone breakdown, when they got there discovered he had been using his wife's keys to get in (not sure why he had them), his keys were in the other pocket. Once driving to work when his puppy jumped out of the car window at 60mph. It rolled down the road and was apparently unharmed. I could go on and on to be honest. J can't remember his surname - completely dominated by his

                                J P C 3 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • J Jimmy Savile

                                  We are all in the sort of field that attracts eccentrics and let's face it downright weirdos. The place I work has quite a few I will list them here. 1.) MW. I think I have mentioned him before, he stares at his screen-saver for two hour periods(no exaggeration) he also disappears for longer periods, nobody anywhere on site sees him during these periods and nobody knows where he goes. We suspect he returns to the Mother Ship. 2.) SJ. He collects Oranges, Clementines and Satsumas on top of his Desktop in various stages of decomposition. Some have been there for over a year and are nothing but a small grey furball, I have no idea why he does this, I don't really talk to him so can't really ask out of the blue, but I would love to know. I can only he assume has a bad case of syphilis and needs to grow his own Penicillin. 3.) IS. This man is more of an eccentric than a weirdo. He has made it to this list because he lets his kids dress him in the morning. That's right whatever they choose he wears it. Sometimes he doesn't match, sometimes he clashes but everytime without fail he looks like a Dick. He does it because his Kids like to do it so good on him. What weirdos do you work with name and shame them here. P.S. If you can't think who the weirdo is at your work then it's you!

                                  P Offline
                                  P Offline
                                  peterchen
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #22

                                  All weirdos around here! When I enter the room, they look away and start to whisper only behind my back. They are probably socially dyfunctional or something.

                                  ORDER BY what user wants

                                  J 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • P peterchen

                                    All weirdos around here! When I enter the room, they look away and start to whisper only behind my back. They are probably socially dyfunctional or something.

                                    ORDER BY what user wants

                                    J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    Jimmy Savile
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #23

                                    I reckon it's to do with your face-paint.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • L Lost User

                                      I'm not sure we have anyone here who is an out and out weirdo. Just your run of the mill oddities that can probably be found anywhere. A lot of them have been here a long time and there is a strangeness that comes over all who have settled into the same groove for many, many years. Last place I worked I'll have a go at. PT - Supposed development manager, complete social inadequate. Lived on his own, living room was a single chair, a projector and screen, with games consoles and freeview box linked to it. Once turned up late to a meeting because he had been watching Pokemon. Once said he had had Smarties cereal for breakfast, when challenged "I didn't know they made a cereal" replied "It was just a bowl of Smarties". Got the job because he had been there since the start. One of the main reasons I left. ***EDIT - Sorry, Smarties cereal was IT Crowd, he said Skittles, and this was several years before The IT Crowd. Yes, he was that much of a cliche. AM - Started out as a 16 year old, mum knew the IT Director. Very smart, very capable, extremely intense. Got sacked for shagging the 15 year old work experience girl who was also the daughter of the HR manager. They remained in a relationship for over 4 years. Recently saw him again (7 year later) working in MacDonalds. Can't remember his name - didn't turn up one day, then the police did and took a load of computers away. Now in prison. TB - known as monkey since he turned up one day in a jumper that looked like this fella[^]. Once deleted a directory of source code by mistake; this led to the introduction of SCM. Once moved a directory of source code to a different directory by mistake. Once drove into one of the 4 foot high boulders used for traffic management on the site whilst waving good bye to someone, hit it square in the middle of the front bumper and put a V shape into the car, writing it off. Once went into town at lunchtime, when got back to car it wouldn't unlock. Phone breakdown, when they got there discovered he had been using his wife's keys to get in (not sure why he had them), his keys were in the other pocket. Once driving to work when his puppy jumped out of the car window at 60mph. It rolled down the road and was apparently unharmed. I could go on and on to be honest. J can't remember his surname - completely dominated by his

                                      J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      Jimmy Savile
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #24

                                      Brilliant sounds better than my place.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • S S Houghtelin

                                        All the weirdos I know are in my wife's family... I guess that makes me the weirdo; well there is that guy that looks like Santa Claus, oh and the dude dressed up like a cowboy, and the little fella’ with the big, I mean big, truck. I better quit before I get to someone who’s a CP member. They're not weird they're just, different.

                                        It was broke, so I fixed it.

                                        B Offline
                                        B Offline
                                        bwhittington
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #25

                                        My wife's family is full of scientologists. My wife thankfully is not.

                                        Brett A. Whittington Application Developer

                                        S 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • B bwhittington

                                          My wife's family is full of scientologists. My wife thankfully is not.

                                          Brett A. Whittington Application Developer

                                          S Offline
                                          S Offline
                                          S Houghtelin
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #26

                                          bwhittington wrote:

                                          My wife's family is full of scientologists

                                          How does one break the ice with that lot? So, ever been to Xenu? How's 'ol L Ron doin these days?

                                          It was broke, so I fixed it.

                                          B 1 Reply Last reply
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