This is never going to work.
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How about keep it short, and make it popular: "The bars open, and the drinks are on me" would fit both criteria very nicely.
The universe is composed of electrons, neutrons, protons and......morons. (ThePhantomUpvoter)
It's a free bar. Well it's one of them right posh dos with penguins walking around with bottles. Anyway, all I need to do is "Welcome, thank you Mr X for coming, enjoy the focking fulk dancing and facking fucinating embroidery. Bish, bash, bosh, let's hit the nosh." Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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It's a free bar. Well it's one of them right posh dos with penguins walking around with bottles. Anyway, all I need to do is "Welcome, thank you Mr X for coming, enjoy the focking fulk dancing and facking fucinating embroidery. Bish, bash, bosh, let's hit the nosh." Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
Nagy Vilmos wrote:
Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.
Talk very slowly and loudly.
The universe is composed of electrons, neutrons, protons and......morons. (ThePhantomUpvoter)
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Your assumption that I am not drinking is naive at best.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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It's a free bar. Well it's one of them right posh dos with penguins walking around with bottles. Anyway, all I need to do is "Welcome, thank you Mr X for coming, enjoy the focking fulk dancing and facking fucinating embroidery. Bish, bash, bosh, let's hit the nosh." Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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Or "the population of Portsmouth"
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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Just ramble in Hungarian (about the weather or the countryside or something) for a few minutes.
Half of the audience will be Hungarian; no can do.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
Can you manage a convincing 'illness'? (Nothing too bad though, you will need to recover quickly enough to carry on drinking).
--------------------------------- Obscurum per obscurius. Ad astra per alas porci. Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur. CCC Link[^] Can you Help?
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Can you manage a convincing 'illness'? (Nothing too bad though, you will need to recover quickly enough to carry on drinking).
--------------------------------- Obscurum per obscurius. Ad astra per alas porci. Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur. CCC Link[^] Can you Help?
You fool, they'll never let me to the bar if I don't say something!
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
Give them this: I apologize for my voice, I've apparently caught something from one of my lovely daughters, If you don't mind I'll make this short... cough... rub throat and smile… croak out an unintelligible word and say excuse me, drink something and sit down. ;)
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
When I consider the magnitude of the subject which I am to bring before the gathering - a subject, in which the interests, not of this country, nor of Europe alone, but of the whole world, and of posterity, are involved: and when I think, at the same time, on the weakness of the advocate who has undertaken this great cause-when these reflections press upon my mind, it is impossible for me not to feel both terrified and concerned at my own inadequacy to such a task. But when I reflect, however, on the encouragement which I have had, through the whole course of a long and laborious examination of this question, and how much candour I have experienced, and how conviction has increased within my own mind, in proportion as I have advanced in my labours; when I reflect, especially, that however averse any gentleman may now be, yet we shall all be of one opinion in the end; when I turn myself to these thoughts, I take courage-I determine to forget all my other fears, and I march forward with a firmer step in the full assurance that my cause will bear me out, and that I shall be able to justify upon the clearest principles, every resolution in my hand. When I think about the great things our nations have achieved together such as...... Then I'd look bewildered and mutter for the remaining time of the speech. Everything except the last line is an almost verbatim copy of the first William Wilberforce's speech in favour of the abolition of the slave trade to the House of Commons, so no one will notice.
“Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
“One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)
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When I consider the magnitude of the subject which I am to bring before the gathering - a subject, in which the interests, not of this country, nor of Europe alone, but of the whole world, and of posterity, are involved: and when I think, at the same time, on the weakness of the advocate who has undertaken this great cause-when these reflections press upon my mind, it is impossible for me not to feel both terrified and concerned at my own inadequacy to such a task. But when I reflect, however, on the encouragement which I have had, through the whole course of a long and laborious examination of this question, and how much candour I have experienced, and how conviction has increased within my own mind, in proportion as I have advanced in my labours; when I reflect, especially, that however averse any gentleman may now be, yet we shall all be of one opinion in the end; when I turn myself to these thoughts, I take courage-I determine to forget all my other fears, and I march forward with a firmer step in the full assurance that my cause will bear me out, and that I shall be able to justify upon the clearest principles, every resolution in my hand. When I think about the great things our nations have achieved together such as...... Then I'd look bewildered and mutter for the remaining time of the speech. Everything except the last line is an almost verbatim copy of the first William Wilberforce's speech in favour of the abolition of the slave trade to the House of Commons, so no one will notice.
“Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
“One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)
That gets a :powerUp:. I have just been asked for a draft of my introduction by the stupid bitch organiser to make sure she doesn't pre-empt what I wish to say. Gud Foocking Luck there! Actually on a read through I have around 5 minutes, it mentions half a dozen interesting Anglo/British facts covers all the entertainment to be had and introduces the [dis]honourable guests. That, my friend, is sorted. Now for a shower and start to get ready.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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"Nagy Vilmos" in Hungarian means "A great protector"! Are you really, Nagy?
Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.
No it doesn't, well of a sort maybe. Nagy means big or great and Vilmos is the Hungarian version of William.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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That gets a :powerUp:. I have just been asked for a draft of my introduction by the stupid bitch organiser to make sure she doesn't pre-empt what I wish to say. Gud Foocking Luck there! Actually on a read through I have around 5 minutes, it mentions half a dozen interesting Anglo/British facts covers all the entertainment to be had and introduces the [dis]honourable guests. That, my friend, is sorted. Now for a shower and start to get ready.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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Well fock me, a tipping mistake. Obviously I meant either Hungarian/British or Anglo/Hungarian. Or shyt.
Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol
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When I consider the magnitude of the subject which I am to bring before the gathering - a subject, in which the interests, not of this country, nor of Europe alone, but of the whole world, and of posterity, are involved: and when I think, at the same time, on the weakness of the advocate who has undertaken this great cause-when these reflections press upon my mind, it is impossible for me not to feel both terrified and concerned at my own inadequacy to such a task. But when I reflect, however, on the encouragement which I have had, through the whole course of a long and laborious examination of this question, and how much candour I have experienced, and how conviction has increased within my own mind, in proportion as I have advanced in my labours; when I reflect, especially, that however averse any gentleman may now be, yet we shall all be of one opinion in the end; when I turn myself to these thoughts, I take courage-I determine to forget all my other fears, and I march forward with a firmer step in the full assurance that my cause will bear me out, and that I shall be able to justify upon the clearest principles, every resolution in my hand. When I think about the great things our nations have achieved together such as...... Then I'd look bewildered and mutter for the remaining time of the speech. Everything except the last line is an almost verbatim copy of the first William Wilberforce's speech in favour of the abolition of the slave trade to the House of Commons, so no one will notice.
“Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
“One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)
And I thought I was full of shit.
Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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And I thought I was full of shit.
Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
You are, but it doesn't stop me from being the same.
“Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
“One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)
