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  3. This is never going to work.

This is never going to work.

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • N Nagy Vilmos

    It's a free bar. Well it's one of them right posh dos with penguins walking around with bottles. Anyway, all I need to do is "Welcome, thank you Mr X for coming, enjoy the focking fulk dancing and facking fucinating embroidery. Bish, bash, bosh, let's hit the nosh." Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.

    Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #10

    Nagy Vilmos wrote:

    Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.

    Check out the buzzword-bingo forum. I'm sure that it can be used to generate a five-minute lore ipsum :)

    Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]

    A 1 Reply Last reply
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    • N Nagy Vilmos

      I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!

      Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

      B Offline
      B Offline
      BobJanova
      wrote on last edited by
      #11

      Just ramble in Hungarian (about the weather or the countryside or something) for a few minutes.

      N 1 Reply Last reply
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      • L Lost User

        Thought the answer to your title was 'Nagy'.

        N Offline
        N Offline
        Nagy Vilmos
        wrote on last edited by
        #12

        Or "the population of Portsmouth"

        Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • B BobJanova

          Just ramble in Hungarian (about the weather or the countryside or something) for a few minutes.

          N Offline
          N Offline
          Nagy Vilmos
          wrote on last edited by
          #13

          Half of the audience will be Hungarian; no can do.

          Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • N Nagy Vilmos

            I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!

            Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

            D Offline
            D Offline
            Dalek Dave
            wrote on last edited by
            #14

            Can you manage a convincing 'illness'? (Nothing too bad though, you will need to recover quickly enough to carry on drinking).

            --------------------------------- Obscurum per obscurius. Ad astra per alas porci. Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur. CCC Link[^] Can you Help?

            N 1 Reply Last reply
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            • L Lost User

              Nagy Vilmos wrote:

              Then I have to spread that out over 5 frogging minutes.

              Check out the buzzword-bingo forum. I'm sure that it can be used to generate a five-minute lore ipsum :)

              Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]

              A Offline
              A Offline
              Argonia
              wrote on last edited by
              #15

              Before some time was posted in the Lounge link for bacon ipsum :)

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • D Dalek Dave

                Can you manage a convincing 'illness'? (Nothing too bad though, you will need to recover quickly enough to carry on drinking).

                --------------------------------- Obscurum per obscurius. Ad astra per alas porci. Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur. CCC Link[^] Can you Help?

                N Offline
                N Offline
                Nagy Vilmos
                wrote on last edited by
                #16

                You fool, they'll never let me to the bar if I don't say something!

                Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • N Nagy Vilmos

                  I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!

                  Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                  S Offline
                  S Offline
                  S Houghtelin
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #17

                  Give them this: I apologize for my voice, I've apparently caught something from one of my lovely daughters, If you don't mind I'll make this short... cough... rub throat and smile… croak out an unintelligible word and say excuse me, drink something and sit down. ;)

                  It was broke, so I fixed it.

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                    I have a dinner tonight, a nice posh black tie do. Anglo-Hungarian Cultural drivel dontchaknow. I have to deliver a few words and I had two months notice of this. Go on, guess how much I have done? Go on, I bet you can't!

                    Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                    K Offline
                    K Offline
                    Keith Barrow
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #18

                    When I consider the magnitude of the subject which I am to bring before the gathering - a subject, in which the interests, not of this country, nor of Europe alone, but of the whole world, and of posterity, are involved: and when I think, at the same time, on the weakness of the advocate who has undertaken this great cause-when these reflections press upon my mind, it is impossible for me not to feel both terrified and concerned at my own inadequacy to such a task. But when I reflect, however, on the encouragement which I have had, through the whole course of a long and laborious examination of this question, and how much candour I have experienced, and how conviction has increased within my own mind, in proportion as I have advanced in my labours; when I reflect, especially, that however averse any gentleman may now be, yet we shall all be of one opinion in the end; when I turn myself to these thoughts, I take courage-I determine to forget all my other fears, and I march forward with a firmer step in the full assurance that my cause will bear me out, and that I shall be able to justify upon the clearest principles, every resolution in my hand. When I think about the great things our nations have achieved together such as...... Then I'd look bewildered and mutter for the remaining time of the speech. Everything except the last line is an almost verbatim copy of the first William Wilberforce's speech in favour of the abolition of the slave trade to the House of Commons, so no one will notice.

                    “Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
                    “One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”

                    Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)

                    N L 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • K Keith Barrow

                      When I consider the magnitude of the subject which I am to bring before the gathering - a subject, in which the interests, not of this country, nor of Europe alone, but of the whole world, and of posterity, are involved: and when I think, at the same time, on the weakness of the advocate who has undertaken this great cause-when these reflections press upon my mind, it is impossible for me not to feel both terrified and concerned at my own inadequacy to such a task. But when I reflect, however, on the encouragement which I have had, through the whole course of a long and laborious examination of this question, and how much candour I have experienced, and how conviction has increased within my own mind, in proportion as I have advanced in my labours; when I reflect, especially, that however averse any gentleman may now be, yet we shall all be of one opinion in the end; when I turn myself to these thoughts, I take courage-I determine to forget all my other fears, and I march forward with a firmer step in the full assurance that my cause will bear me out, and that I shall be able to justify upon the clearest principles, every resolution in my hand. When I think about the great things our nations have achieved together such as...... Then I'd look bewildered and mutter for the remaining time of the speech. Everything except the last line is an almost verbatim copy of the first William Wilberforce's speech in favour of the abolition of the slave trade to the House of Commons, so no one will notice.

                      “Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
                      “One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”

                      Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)

                      N Offline
                      N Offline
                      Nagy Vilmos
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #19

                      That gets a :powerUp:. I have just been asked for a draft of my introduction by the stupid bitch organiser to make sure she doesn't pre-empt what I wish to say. Gud Foocking Luck there! Actually on a read through I have around 5 minutes, it mentions half a dozen interesting Anglo/British facts covers all the entertainment to be had and introduces the [dis]honourable guests. That, my friend, is sorted. Now for a shower and start to get ready.

                      Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                      L 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • L Lost User

                        Thought the answer to your title was 'Nagy'.

                        J Offline
                        J Offline
                        Joezer BH
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #20

                        "Nagy Vilmos" in Hungarian means "A great protector"! Are you really, Nagy?

                        Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.

                        N 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • J Joezer BH

                          "Nagy Vilmos" in Hungarian means "A great protector"! Are you really, Nagy?

                          Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.

                          N Offline
                          N Offline
                          Nagy Vilmos
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #21

                          No it doesn't, well of a sort maybe. Nagy means big or great and Vilmos is the Hungarian version of William.

                          Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                          J 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • N Nagy Vilmos

                            That gets a :powerUp:. I have just been asked for a draft of my introduction by the stupid bitch organiser to make sure she doesn't pre-empt what I wish to say. Gud Foocking Luck there! Actually on a read through I have around 5 minutes, it mentions half a dozen interesting Anglo/British facts covers all the entertainment to be had and introduces the [dis]honourable guests. That, my friend, is sorted. Now for a shower and start to get ready.

                            Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                            L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Lost User
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #22

                            Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                            Anglo/British

                            As opposed to Celtic/British?

                            N 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                              Anglo/British

                              As opposed to Celtic/British?

                              N Offline
                              N Offline
                              Nagy Vilmos
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #23

                              Well fock me, a tipping mistake. Obviously I meant either Hungarian/British or Anglo/Hungarian. Or shyt.

                              Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • K Keith Barrow

                                When I consider the magnitude of the subject which I am to bring before the gathering - a subject, in which the interests, not of this country, nor of Europe alone, but of the whole world, and of posterity, are involved: and when I think, at the same time, on the weakness of the advocate who has undertaken this great cause-when these reflections press upon my mind, it is impossible for me not to feel both terrified and concerned at my own inadequacy to such a task. But when I reflect, however, on the encouragement which I have had, through the whole course of a long and laborious examination of this question, and how much candour I have experienced, and how conviction has increased within my own mind, in proportion as I have advanced in my labours; when I reflect, especially, that however averse any gentleman may now be, yet we shall all be of one opinion in the end; when I turn myself to these thoughts, I take courage-I determine to forget all my other fears, and I march forward with a firmer step in the full assurance that my cause will bear me out, and that I shall be able to justify upon the clearest principles, every resolution in my hand. When I think about the great things our nations have achieved together such as...... Then I'd look bewildered and mutter for the remaining time of the speech. Everything except the last line is an almost verbatim copy of the first William Wilberforce's speech in favour of the abolition of the slave trade to the House of Commons, so no one will notice.

                                “Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
                                “One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”

                                Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                Lost User
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #24

                                And I thought I was full of shit.

                                Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004

                                K 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • L Lost User

                                  And I thought I was full of shit.

                                  Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004

                                  K Offline
                                  K Offline
                                  Keith Barrow
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #25

                                  You are, but it doesn't stop me from being the same.

                                  “Education is not the piling on of learning, information, data, facts, skills, or abilities - that's training or instruction - but is rather making visible what is hidden as a seed”
                                  “One of the greatest problems of our time is that many are schooled but few are educated”

                                  Sir Thomas More (1478 – 1535)

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                                    No it doesn't, well of a sort maybe. Nagy means big or great and Vilmos is the Hungarian version of William.

                                    Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                                    J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    Joezer BH
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #26

                                    What kind of a broke Hungarian :sigh: are you Mr Protector? Of course the uneducated may only know the William equivalent ... but, see Yes, it does! (and I am not even one inch Hungarian) and boo :thumbsdown: you, for making me ask Dr. google to make sure I don't turn out all stupid... Disclosure: I actually think "great protector" is quite a cool name (although not too modest)!

                                    Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.

                                    N 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • J Joezer BH

                                      What kind of a broke Hungarian :sigh: are you Mr Protector? Of course the uneducated may only know the William equivalent ... but, see Yes, it does! (and I am not even one inch Hungarian) and boo :thumbsdown: you, for making me ask Dr. google to make sure I don't turn out all stupid... Disclosure: I actually think "great protector" is quite a cool name (although not too modest)!

                                      Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.

                                      N Offline
                                      N Offline
                                      Nagy Vilmos
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #27

                                      Try Mr Big. Hungarian names are Family first then Given; for example Spielberg Istvan the famous director.

                                      Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                                      J 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • N Nagy Vilmos

                                        Try Mr Big. Hungarian names are Family first then Given; for example Spielberg Istvan the famous director.

                                        Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                                        J Offline
                                        J Offline
                                        Joezer BH
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #28

                                        well, did you ask your mom about Vilmos already? e.g.: "Hi mom, yes, I know I didn't call you for over a week, yes ... yes mom anyway, I just wanted to ask you about something here, see this strange guy over at CP says that Vilmos means protector, what do you reckon, huh mom? is he talking rubbish? or did I just turn out as Mr. not-so-Big?"

                                        Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.

                                        N 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • J Joezer BH

                                          well, did you ask your mom about Vilmos already? e.g.: "Hi mom, yes, I know I didn't call you for over a week, yes ... yes mom anyway, I just wanted to ask you about something here, see this strange guy over at CP says that Vilmos means protector, what do you reckon, huh mom? is he talking rubbish? or did I just turn out as Mr. not-so-Big?"

                                          Never underestimate the difference you can make in the lives of others.

                                          N Offline
                                          N Offline
                                          Nagy Vilmos
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #29

                                          Considering I'm not Hungarian [don't tell] I think she wouldn't understand. The truth? You can't handle the truth! Actually you probably can. My name is William hence the Vilmos. When I first worked out in Hungary my then boss called me Big Willy and so the Nagy Vilmos name came along when I needed a name for my hotmail account. I still use the name as Mrs Wife finds it funny.

                                          Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol

                                          J 1 Reply Last reply
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