Reading between the lines...questions from non-IT people
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
I guess that I am showing my age... For years I had trouble convincing my wife that she did not need to have the TV on the same channel while recording a show on the VCR (that's right, I said VCR ;P ). Seems that she did not understand that the TV had its own tuner and that the VCR had its own separate tuner.
Fletcher Glenn
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Boy, you have a well trained QA department! They know they have to write a bug report... I've had the opposite problem at times. For instance, I was trying to write an automated test for a "back" button. Worked perfectly the first time. Asked to start, asked to "back" and it executed the back button. Run it again and the back button fails to execute because it doesn't exist. What's going on is that the button to go forward executed SQL commands, the data wasn't cached so it took a couple of seconds to retrieve the data. Next run, the data was cached and it moved forward to the next screen as designed and the back button didn't exist. Now, do I write a bug against the code because it works as designed causing my automated test to fail or against my automated test because it can't consistently test the back button.
KP Lee wrote:
Boy, you have a well trained QA department!
Yes, yes, we did. :laugh: It was interesting place to work at for all the wrong reasons. We had one old gentleman who was disgruntled that his ideas for the code design was being ignored, so he used to write up bug reports so the resolution would be to implement his design without the usual review. We finally caught on. We didn't use automated testing, instead we had to write scripts explaining point by point what to enter and click, along with the expected response, assuming no prior knowledge of the application. The QA department liked to hire kids from the high school across the street to do regression testing. It didn't help that we also had clueless designers. Our coding team was pretty good, but we had to deal with non-technical designers and incompetent management. The designers didn't want to see cursors (this was back in the day of text screens) blinking, so the previous set of programmers had been instructed to hide the cursor off screen...and then wondered why error messages were not being displayed. To solve that, they took to logging errors to the hard drive...including "out of disk space" :doh: But the one bright spot was when they did decide to tackle the error message displays to make them unambiguous. Since there are errors that can occur in different places for the same reason, some had taken to using different wording to indicate to the programmer where the error had occurred. In the same vein as "You are in a twisty maze" versus "The maze is all twisty." Subtle differences lost on the QA department. We wanted numbers, but the non-technical designers deemed them "too technical", but we finally agreed on a compromise of a number followed by a message. Radical eh? Our hope was that we could get people to at least write down the number. A forlorn hope.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
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KP Lee wrote:
Boy, you have a well trained QA department!
Yes, yes, we did. :laugh: It was interesting place to work at for all the wrong reasons. We had one old gentleman who was disgruntled that his ideas for the code design was being ignored, so he used to write up bug reports so the resolution would be to implement his design without the usual review. We finally caught on. We didn't use automated testing, instead we had to write scripts explaining point by point what to enter and click, along with the expected response, assuming no prior knowledge of the application. The QA department liked to hire kids from the high school across the street to do regression testing. It didn't help that we also had clueless designers. Our coding team was pretty good, but we had to deal with non-technical designers and incompetent management. The designers didn't want to see cursors (this was back in the day of text screens) blinking, so the previous set of programmers had been instructed to hide the cursor off screen...and then wondered why error messages were not being displayed. To solve that, they took to logging errors to the hard drive...including "out of disk space" :doh: But the one bright spot was when they did decide to tackle the error message displays to make them unambiguous. Since there are errors that can occur in different places for the same reason, some had taken to using different wording to indicate to the programmer where the error had occurred. In the same vein as "You are in a twisty maze" versus "The maze is all twisty." Subtle differences lost on the QA department. We wanted numbers, but the non-technical designers deemed them "too technical", but we finally agreed on a compromise of a number followed by a message. Radical eh? Our hope was that we could get people to at least write down the number. A forlorn hope.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
Another radical idea, set up a DB that tracks the error message and the program file that creates the message and when it is inserted into a table maybe the line number in the file when it was recorded (At least the function it is in) and you then use the identity field's value in the error message. When you look up the records that match LIKE '%maze%' you can then list all the messages and ask them to identify which one they got, so they can say "I dunno, doe-N rememer"
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
Can you download the internet to my memory (flash drive)?
CEO at: - Rafaga Systems - Para Facturas - Modern Components for the moment...
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Matt U. wrote:
"I need faster internet or something, my computer keeps freezing on me."
I'm sure that was funny in context... but in reality, everything is starting to run from the internet, and it really is the slowest communication point between all the connections in a computer. This nonsense will become more logical as time marches on.
"Nonsense more logical" or "logical nonsense"? Either way, its an oxymoran.
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
Also "Computer" when they mean "Monitor".
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
I know one who refers to Microsoft Office as an Operating System:~
<sig notetoself="think of a better signature"> <first>Jim</first> <last>Meadors</last> </sig>
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
One I get all the time which I'm surprised I haven't read yet: desktop background == screen saver "Nice screen saver!" they'll say, about a desktop background photo...usually I thank them and follow that by asking "Hey what do they call that animation that appears when your computer is left idle..?" and they fall silent. Prior graphics designer used to quip "let's go digital" when intending to move our newsletter from PDF to HTML format... My mom greatly amuses me with the use of "voice" for computer audio...."my computer has no voice!" she'll say, when the speakers aren't working. However if computers evolve to the point where they naturally converse with users then this will start making a lot of sense.
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Another radical idea, set up a DB that tracks the error message and the program file that creates the message and when it is inserted into a table maybe the line number in the file when it was recorded (At least the function it is in) and you then use the identity field's value in the error message. When you look up the records that match LIKE '%maze%' you can then list all the messages and ask them to identify which one they got, so they can say "I dunno, doe-N rememer"
KP Lee wrote:
set up a DB that tracks the error message
Nice sentiment, wrong era. I do that now, and for critical errors, have the program e-mail me what ails it, so I'm ready for the inevitable customer service call. But this was the early 90's and networks were barely in existence (the battles were raging over Token Ring or TCP/IP) and DBASE was the only SQL database we had access to on an individual machine. As I recall we only had one person on staff who knew anything about SQL. The application was using 2400 baud modems to talk to the mainframe that had the document search engine. The workstation program was responsible for presentation and maintaining the document cache. At approximately 240 characters a second, you don't download megabyte documents. So the program had to track what portions of a document had already been downloaded and ask for the missing pieces should the user scroll through to one. There was a mode called KWIC - key word in context, where you could search for a term, like "mickey mouse" and you could configure it to display x lines in front and y lines after the line found with that term, for as many places it occurred in the document. It was designed for legal document searches and lawyers (at that time) were extremely technophobic. The company had been brought kicking and screaming into the computer age. We even had a semi-clandestine project to bring the search engine to the desktop using those newfangled devices called "CD-ROMs". Management was unconvinced that they would ever amount to anything.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
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One I get all the time which I'm surprised I haven't read yet: desktop background == screen saver "Nice screen saver!" they'll say, about a desktop background photo...usually I thank them and follow that by asking "Hey what do they call that animation that appears when your computer is left idle..?" and they fall silent. Prior graphics designer used to quip "let's go digital" when intending to move our newsletter from PDF to HTML format... My mom greatly amuses me with the use of "voice" for computer audio...."my computer has no voice!" she'll say, when the speakers aren't working. However if computers evolve to the point where they naturally converse with users then this will start making a lot of sense.