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Some advice needed...

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  • J Jeremy Falcon

    Not really interested in your condescending post. Go away.

    Jeremy Falcon

    S Offline
    S Offline
    SeattleC
    wrote on last edited by
    #96

    Wasn't intended as condescention, but as a list of antidotes for feeling like you're the smartest person in the room. I get that if you were humble-bragging, you don't really want this list.

    J 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • J Jeremy Falcon

      Marc, you know I like you, and for a good reason... you're spot on man. Upon careful reflection over the weekend it simply just dawned on me I'm in a toxic environment. People are moody and angry and negligent here, and over the past year I've quite simply fell into that trap myself. It's bad juju man. I don't want to become that, and my weaknesses have exasperated because of this.

      Jeremy Falcon

      M Offline
      M Offline
      Marc Clifton
      wrote on last edited by
      #97

      Thanks for the response, Jeremy. Given where I work, it's nice to get some positive feedback.

      Jeremy Falcon wrote:

      I'm in a toxic environment.

      While I don't have the moody/angry/negligent situation at my work, you're response has helped me realize that I would consider my work environment toxic as well, but for lesser reasons -- cubicle, no windows, no social contact except a Monday meeting and inane lunchtime conversation with the other team members that I don't see otherwise because they are in their cubicles all day, and while my supervisor is awesome (one of the few redeeming things) her supervisor is a control freak with little people skills. So, while writing my original response, I was also thinking about my own situation and the irony that I had emailed said control freak supervisor with a "you know, we haven't really had a chance to get to know each other, how about lunch some time" bridge building attempt. Sadly, the response was "I work through lunch, [and reading between the lines] so piss off." :sigh: Marc

      Latest Article - Merkle Trees Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802

      J 1 Reply Last reply
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      • M Marc Clifton

        Thanks for the response, Jeremy. Given where I work, it's nice to get some positive feedback.

        Jeremy Falcon wrote:

        I'm in a toxic environment.

        While I don't have the moody/angry/negligent situation at my work, you're response has helped me realize that I would consider my work environment toxic as well, but for lesser reasons -- cubicle, no windows, no social contact except a Monday meeting and inane lunchtime conversation with the other team members that I don't see otherwise because they are in their cubicles all day, and while my supervisor is awesome (one of the few redeeming things) her supervisor is a control freak with little people skills. So, while writing my original response, I was also thinking about my own situation and the irony that I had emailed said control freak supervisor with a "you know, we haven't really had a chance to get to know each other, how about lunch some time" bridge building attempt. Sadly, the response was "I work through lunch, [and reading between the lines] so piss off." :sigh: Marc

        Latest Article - Merkle Trees Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802

        J Offline
        J Offline
        Jeremy Falcon
        wrote on last edited by
        #98

        Truly wise you are man for being introspective like that, and I suppose I should be grateful then as the people I work with attempt to at least be sociable.... being Hollywood and all. But it's still to the point it's a hit and miss at times. Not that I'm perfect either... far from it. I've just learned some things and gotten over some insecurities that few people in IT ever do. And it's been rough to deal. Irony is, reading your post now has made me realize to be more positive. Even if I changed environments... or not... or whatever... be grateful you know. And you can always chat with me if you're feeling the lonely blues man. I totally understand how that goes. Been dealign with that myself here lately when I moved halfway across the country to a land completely different. Hope it gets better for you.

        Jeremy Falcon

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • S SeattleC

          Wasn't intended as condescention, but as a list of antidotes for feeling like you're the smartest person in the room. I get that if you were humble-bragging, you don't really want this list.

          J Offline
          J Offline
          Jeremy Falcon
          wrote on last edited by
          #99

          Fair enough. I suppose if I felt superior and liked it then I'd need a dose of keep-it-real medicine; it wouldn't give me anxiety though if I liked it. I tried to make that point clear. Maybe I should've tried harder. In retrospect it may be due to communication issues that are deep rooted in me. And being in a toxic environment didn't really help. I get where you're coming from though. Putting myself in your place I'd probably assume the same thing.

          Jeremy Falcon

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • J Jeremy Falcon

            So, in our careers, I'm sure we've all learned there are really smart people and there are those that aren't. Maybe they pretend to be smart when not, maybe they embrace being not so smart and just laugh at it. Maybe they're not book smart, but street smart. And sometimes we think someone is less intelligent, when they're in fact super smart. And vice versa. Either way, you get the drift. However, despite appearances, there are those that seem to figure things out and those that don't. And by the nature of even suggesting you're more intelligent than another, also lends itself to arrogance. Which everyone knows arrogance and intelligence conflict and cannot be considered smart. And yet, even Einstein thought the world stupid. And of course, it doesn't mean to say that less intelligent people cannot teach more intelligent people things and vice versa. But, what do you guys do, when faced with a situation where you feel it's impossible to grow intellectually because of the environment? In situations where you clearly know you're the smartest in the room, save a few gems you meet on occasion? And I don't mean smart as in knowing more about computers. I mean smart as in being more aware and conscious, less in your head and more observant, picking up on things quicker, remembering more, etc... cognition and perception prowess as it were. Everyone else seems dazed and confused, and you get bored. I know for me, I've been annoyed and frustrated with this practically my whole life, to the point it can create undue stress. Which is counter intuitive and destructive actually, because increased "knowing" should make people happy. And frustration is bad juju that's contagious. And yet, I'm still undecided if this is mainly due to me looking for the worst in people and trying to feel smarter due to inherent insecurities, or in fact I just am. Or both. Surely, someone on CP has faced this too? What do you guys do when you clearly know you see things clearer but you're alone in that regards?

            Jeremy Falcon

            I Offline
            I Offline
            Idaho Edokpayi
            wrote on last edited by
            #100

            This will take real self awareness and reflection, and I think using the words "smartest person in the room" is dangerous because it can make you arrogant and complacent. Avoid situations and companies where you are the only person learning and growing, but be open to learning from others. Everyone needs to learn to identify what other people know that they don't. Without knowing the specifics of your situation maybe the truth is that the other people are merely interested in learning different things? On the other hand, most companies are stagnant and a little stupid and the fact that they haven't yet bankrupted themselves or been superseded by a smarter more nimble competitor is remarkable!

            Idaho Edokpayi

            J 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • I Idaho Edokpayi

              This will take real self awareness and reflection, and I think using the words "smartest person in the room" is dangerous because it can make you arrogant and complacent. Avoid situations and companies where you are the only person learning and growing, but be open to learning from others. Everyone needs to learn to identify what other people know that they don't. Without knowing the specifics of your situation maybe the truth is that the other people are merely interested in learning different things? On the other hand, most companies are stagnant and a little stupid and the fact that they haven't yet bankrupted themselves or been superseded by a smarter more nimble competitor is remarkable!

              Idaho Edokpayi

              J Offline
              J Offline
              Jeremy Falcon
              wrote on last edited by
              #101

              Thanks for this man. And what you speak of is truth. What I think the issue really is, rather than saying everyone is stupid, is we have a bunch of people with social anxiety issues here that are overly stressed. Getting in their heads too much and thus not paying attention to anything. So they lack clarity.

              Idaho Edokpayi wrote:

              On the other hand, most companies are stagnant and a little stupid and the fact that they haven't yet bankrupted themselves or been superseded by a smarter more nimble competitor is remarkable!

              Preach it brother.

              Jeremy Falcon

              I 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • J Jeremy Falcon

                Thanks for this man. And what you speak of is truth. What I think the issue really is, rather than saying everyone is stupid, is we have a bunch of people with social anxiety issues here that are overly stressed. Getting in their heads too much and thus not paying attention to anything. So they lack clarity.

                Idaho Edokpayi wrote:

                On the other hand, most companies are stagnant and a little stupid and the fact that they haven't yet bankrupted themselves or been superseded by a smarter more nimble competitor is remarkable!

                Preach it brother.

                Jeremy Falcon

                I Offline
                I Offline
                Idaho Edokpayi
                wrote on last edited by
                #102

                I think many of us have been where you are. The truth is that for most of us THERE IS NO HAPPY PLACE. Maybe you can work for yourself? As coders we have to learn that most businesses are not in the business of code - stupid code is ok as long as it makes money. However, business does not seem to be aware of the extent that code can disrupt the current way that they do business.

                Idaho Edokpayi

                J 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • I Idaho Edokpayi

                  I think many of us have been where you are. The truth is that for most of us THERE IS NO HAPPY PLACE. Maybe you can work for yourself? As coders we have to learn that most businesses are not in the business of code - stupid code is ok as long as it makes money. However, business does not seem to be aware of the extent that code can disrupt the current way that they do business.

                  Idaho Edokpayi

                  J Offline
                  J Offline
                  Jeremy Falcon
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #103

                  I know what you mean man, but it's not even so much code related. It's just cognitive acumen I'm referring to. The code can suffer as a result of that, but I wouldn't expect business people to know code no more than I expect me to be an expert mechanic when taking my truck to the shop. Anyway, it's amazing what stress and social anxiety can do. Never really seen just how much it messes with a person until you get a group of people together that all have it.

                  Jeremy Falcon

                  I 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • J Jeremy Falcon

                    I know what you mean man, but it's not even so much code related. It's just cognitive acumen I'm referring to. The code can suffer as a result of that, but I wouldn't expect business people to know code no more than I expect me to be an expert mechanic when taking my truck to the shop. Anyway, it's amazing what stress and social anxiety can do. Never really seen just how much it messes with a person until you get a group of people together that all have it.

                    Jeremy Falcon

                    I Offline
                    I Offline
                    Idaho Edokpayi
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #104

                    I am speaking to the value assigned to developers and people who aggressively use technology to solve problems. A kid with some javascript and a database can replace thousands of human hours of labor in a week.

                    Idaho Edokpayi

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • J Jeremy Falcon

                      So, in our careers, I'm sure we've all learned there are really smart people and there are those that aren't. Maybe they pretend to be smart when not, maybe they embrace being not so smart and just laugh at it. Maybe they're not book smart, but street smart. And sometimes we think someone is less intelligent, when they're in fact super smart. And vice versa. Either way, you get the drift. However, despite appearances, there are those that seem to figure things out and those that don't. And by the nature of even suggesting you're more intelligent than another, also lends itself to arrogance. Which everyone knows arrogance and intelligence conflict and cannot be considered smart. And yet, even Einstein thought the world stupid. And of course, it doesn't mean to say that less intelligent people cannot teach more intelligent people things and vice versa. But, what do you guys do, when faced with a situation where you feel it's impossible to grow intellectually because of the environment? In situations where you clearly know you're the smartest in the room, save a few gems you meet on occasion? And I don't mean smart as in knowing more about computers. I mean smart as in being more aware and conscious, less in your head and more observant, picking up on things quicker, remembering more, etc... cognition and perception prowess as it were. Everyone else seems dazed and confused, and you get bored. I know for me, I've been annoyed and frustrated with this practically my whole life, to the point it can create undue stress. Which is counter intuitive and destructive actually, because increased "knowing" should make people happy. And frustration is bad juju that's contagious. And yet, I'm still undecided if this is mainly due to me looking for the worst in people and trying to feel smarter due to inherent insecurities, or in fact I just am. Or both. Surely, someone on CP has faced this too? What do you guys do when you clearly know you see things clearer but you're alone in that regards?

                      Jeremy Falcon

                      M Offline
                      M Offline
                      mbb01
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #105

                      Don't worry about what the other boys do, worry about what you do. Use your gift by all means, but don't brag or criticise others for not being a clever as you. Help them because one day you'll need someone to help you. No-one is invincible; if you pay it forward it will come back to you by another route.

                      J 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • M mbb01

                        Don't worry about what the other boys do, worry about what you do. Use your gift by all means, but don't brag or criticise others for not being a clever as you. Help them because one day you'll need someone to help you. No-one is invincible; if you pay it forward it will come back to you by another route.

                        J Offline
                        J Offline
                        Jeremy Falcon
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #106

                        I know you're correct in every sense of the words you speak. I have my weaknesses too I suppose, just in different areas. Also, I find that I'm more business-y now and less IT-y as I continue to grow. So my job has to change along with that so I can stay happy. And with happiness comes the ability to do the stuff you mention. Thank you for your reply.

                        Jeremy Falcon

                        1 Reply Last reply
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