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  3. Worst Joke Wednesday

Worst Joke Wednesday

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  • C Offline
    C Offline
    Chris Maunder
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

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    • C Chris Maunder

      I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

      B Offline
      B Offline
      Brian Delahunty
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Oh christ.. Chris... come on... Just cause your having a bad day doesn't mean you should try to ruin ours!!! Regards, Brian Dela :-)

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • C Chris Maunder

        I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

        Z Offline
        Z Offline
        Zachery
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        I see the ball is in my court now.:-D Q: If I am my brother's brother, who am I? A: Me Q: Why did the panda fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did three pandas fall out of the tree? A: The first one was dead, the second one was holding onto the first one, and the thrid one couldn't take the peer pressure. Q: What's something you never want to hear? (well, most people wouldn't want to hear) A: A midget saying your hair smells nice.

        ..........Zack.......... Developer Extraordinaire && Full Time Geek

        Think different, think beige "Don't go out of your way to step on people's toes, but don't stop walking all-together." GCS\P\SS d- s-:- a-- C++$ U--- P--- L- E- W++ N o K-? w+++ O++ !M-- V PS+ PE Y+ PGP t+ 5+ X+ R++ tv++ b++ DI++ D+++ G+>G++++ e* h- r++ y+

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        • C Chris Maunder

          I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

          B Offline
          B Offline
          Brian Delahunty
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Q. What goes "aaaa"? A. A sheep without lips. Regards, Brian Dela :-)

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          • B Brian Delahunty

            Q. What goes "aaaa"? A. A sheep without lips. Regards, Brian Dela :-)

            J Offline
            J Offline
            Jamie Hale
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            Excellent. :) J

            "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

            B 1 Reply Last reply
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            • C Chris Maunder

              I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

              S Offline
              S Offline
              Shog9 0
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Classics: Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug? A: Four. Two in the front, two in the back. Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in your refrigerator? A: There's a footprint in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if two elephants are in your refrigerator? A: There's two footprints in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if three elephants are in your refrigerator? A: The door won't shut. Q: How can you tell if four elephants are in your refrigerator? A: There's a VW Bug in your driveway. Q: Why do ducks have big flat feet? A: To stamp out forest fires. Q: Why do elephants have big flat feet? A: To stamp out flaming ducks.

              Shog9

              drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeds...

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              • J Jamie Hale

                Excellent. :) J

                "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                B Offline
                B Offline
                Brian Delahunty
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Thanks :-D. But it was the sheep.. not me. Regards, Brian Dela :-)

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • C Chris Maunder

                  I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

                  J Offline
                  J Offline
                  Jamie Hale
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Q. Why don't blind people skydive? A. Because it scares the crap out of their dogs. And I just love... Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick. J

                  "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

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                  • Z Zachery

                    I see the ball is in my court now.:-D Q: If I am my brother's brother, who am I? A: Me Q: Why did the panda fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did three pandas fall out of the tree? A: The first one was dead, the second one was holding onto the first one, and the thrid one couldn't take the peer pressure. Q: What's something you never want to hear? (well, most people wouldn't want to hear) A: A midget saying your hair smells nice.

                    ..........Zack.......... Developer Extraordinaire && Full Time Geek

                    Think different, think beige "Don't go out of your way to step on people's toes, but don't stop walking all-together." GCS\P\SS d- s-:- a-- C++$ U--- P--- L- E- W++ N o K-? w+++ O++ !M-- V PS+ PE Y+ PGP t+ 5+ X+ R++ tv++ b++ DI++ D+++ G+>G++++ e* h- r++ y+

                    J Offline
                    J Offline
                    John M Drescher
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Zachery wrote: Q: Why did three pandas fall out of the tree? A: The first one was dead, the second one was holding onto the first one, and the thrid one couldn't take the peer pressure. Well you got me to :laugh: on this one... John

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                    • S Shog9 0

                      Classics: Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug? A: Four. Two in the front, two in the back. Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in your refrigerator? A: There's a footprint in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if two elephants are in your refrigerator? A: There's two footprints in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if three elephants are in your refrigerator? A: The door won't shut. Q: How can you tell if four elephants are in your refrigerator? A: There's a VW Bug in your driveway. Q: Why do ducks have big flat feet? A: To stamp out forest fires. Q: Why do elephants have big flat feet? A: To stamp out flaming ducks.

                      Shog9

                      drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeds...

                      J Offline
                      J Offline
                      Jamie Hale
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Q. How do you fit 12 elephants in a VW Bug? A. A blender. Q. And how do you get them out? A. A straw. J

                      "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                      L 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • C Chris Maunder

                        I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

                        K Offline
                        K Offline
                        KaRl
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        Q. What's the difference between a fish and a tire? A. They both swim, except the tire. I can't wait for tomorrow


                        Silence Means Death Stand On Your Feet Inner Fear Your Worst Enemy Refuse! Resist!

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • C Chris Maunder

                          I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          Q. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs buried in the sand? A. Doug Q. What if he's water skiing? A. Skip Q. What if he's floating in the water? A. Bob Q. What if he's standing outside your front door? A. Matt


                          Work like you don't need the money.
                          Love like you've never been hurt.
                          Dance like nobody's watching.

                          C M M 3 Replies Last reply
                          0
                          • C Chris Maunder

                            I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

                            C Offline
                            C Offline
                            Christopher Duncan
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            People often wonder why I have Chihuahuas[^] in my writing. It actually dates back to when I was a kid and had a pet Chihuahua. My dad had been working on the car, and had left a pan of gasoline on the ground in the back yard that he was using to clean tools. My dog, not being any brighter than the average small, hairless canine, mistook it for a bowl of water and quickly drank it down. The next thing I knew, he was running in circles around the back yard at warp 8, barking furiously. This went on for about 5 minutes and then he just fell over, motionless and silent. Dead? Nope. Just out of gas. Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

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                            • S Shog9 0

                              Classics: Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug? A: Four. Two in the front, two in the back. Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in your refrigerator? A: There's a footprint in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if two elephants are in your refrigerator? A: There's two footprints in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if three elephants are in your refrigerator? A: The door won't shut. Q: How can you tell if four elephants are in your refrigerator? A: There's a VW Bug in your driveway. Q: Why do ducks have big flat feet? A: To stamp out forest fires. Q: Why do elephants have big flat feet? A: To stamp out flaming ducks.

                              Shog9

                              drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeds...

                              J Offline
                              J Offline
                              Jon Sagara
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              Shog9 wrote: Q: Why do ducks have big flat feet? A: To stamp out forest fires. Q: Why do elephants have big flat feet? A: To stamp out flaming ducks. :laugh:

                              Jon Sagara
                              A bottle a night isn't alcoholism - it's persistence! -- A coworker, jokingly

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • C Christopher Duncan

                                People often wonder why I have Chihuahuas[^] in my writing. It actually dates back to when I was a kid and had a pet Chihuahua. My dad had been working on the car, and had left a pan of gasoline on the ground in the back yard that he was using to clean tools. My dog, not being any brighter than the average small, hairless canine, mistook it for a bowl of water and quickly drank it down. The next thing I knew, he was running in circles around the back yard at warp 8, barking furiously. This went on for about 5 minutes and then he just fell over, motionless and silent. Dead? Nope. Just out of gas. Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                J Offline
                                J Offline
                                Jon Sagara
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                :-D Brilliant!

                                Jon Sagara
                                A bottle a night isn't alcoholism - it's persistence! -- A coworker, jokingly

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • C Chris Maunder

                                  I'm having a day and a half. Bad jokes needed ASAP. Lemme start: Q. Why do you look out the window in the morning? A. Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway. Q. Why don't sharks eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny. cheers, Chris Maunder

                                  C Offline
                                  C Offline
                                  Chris Austin
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  Q. Why did the pervert cross the road? A. He was stuck to the chicken. Hows that for bad :) Hey don't worry, I can handle it. I took something. I can see things no one else can see. Why are you dressed like that? - Jack Burton

                                  C 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Lost User

                                    Q. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs buried in the sand? A. Doug Q. What if he's water skiing? A. Skip Q. What if he's floating in the water? A. Bob Q. What if he's standing outside your front door? A. Matt


                                    Work like you don't need the money.
                                    Love like you've never been hurt.
                                    Dance like nobody's watching.

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    Chris Austin
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    Q. What if he's under your car? A. Jack Hey don't worry, I can handle it. I took something. I can see things no one else can see. Why are you dressed like that? - Jack Burton

                                    L 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • C Chris Austin

                                      Q. Why did the pervert cross the road? A. He was stuck to the chicken. Hows that for bad :) Hey don't worry, I can handle it. I took something. I can see things no one else can see. Why are you dressed like that? - Jack Burton

                                      C Offline
                                      C Offline
                                      Christopher Duncan
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Q. Why did the Punk Rocker cross the road? A. Because he was stapled to the chicken. Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                      C 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • C Christopher Duncan

                                        Q. Why did the Punk Rocker cross the road? A. Because he was stapled to the chicken. Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

                                        C Offline
                                        C Offline
                                        Chris Austin
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        :) Hey don't worry, I can handle it. I took something. I can see things no one else can see. Why are you dressed like that? - Jack Burton

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • J Jamie Hale

                                          Q. Why don't blind people skydive? A. Because it scares the crap out of their dogs. And I just love... Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick. J

                                          "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                                          J Offline
                                          J Offline
                                          Jeremy Falcon
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          Jamie Hale wrote: Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick. :laugh: I like that one! Jeremy Falcon

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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