Flood Theory
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This is my theory as to how the flood story came about 1 day in the early days of Man - a hunter-gather came across some fossils of fish high in the hills. He took these to his local Shaman (or whatever the highest religious representitive (RR) was at the time). And said to them - 'I found these high in the hills, how can this be when we know that fish swim in the lakes'. And being a bright person, and not missing a chance to make sure everyone was in fear of the gods and in turn him, the local RR made up a wonderful story about god drowning the world to teach naughty followers a lesson and thus explain away how fossils ended up high in the mountains (because it was underwater for a while).
You forgot the part of how the shaman placed the fossils up high in the hills in the first place :) Chris
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Actually, the flood did happen. Noah did build his boat and filled it full of animals. This is very important because it did save the world from total wipeout. The part of the story that is never told is that on the day of the flood, they actually had the first ever Superbowl. Unfortunately, when halftime came and everyone hit the bathroom at the same time, the primitive sewage system couldn't handle the stress and thus the great flood. Tim Smith Descartes Systems Sciences, Inc.
Any chance the Seahawks were playing in that (or any) superbowl ?? I thought not...:(( ----------------------- Reg : "Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it's the meek who are the problem."
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This is my theory as to how the flood story came about 1 day in the early days of Man - a hunter-gather came across some fossils of fish high in the hills. He took these to his local Shaman (or whatever the highest religious representitive (RR) was at the time). And said to them - 'I found these high in the hills, how can this be when we know that fish swim in the lakes'. And being a bright person, and not missing a chance to make sure everyone was in fear of the gods and in turn him, the local RR made up a wonderful story about god drowning the world to teach naughty followers a lesson and thus explain away how fossils ended up high in the mountains (because it was underwater for a while).
OK, I have read all replies to this post prior to my reply. I am shocked, never did I think I would see the day. Americans using sarcasm, humour and subtely all at the same time. I am much impressed. Anyhow, I know that my ancestors had had a little too much beer that day. Took a quick slash out the back door and BAM, flood. :-D Michael Martin Pegasystems Pty Ltd Australia martm@pegasystems.com +61 413-004-018 "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
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OK, I have read all replies to this post prior to my reply. I am shocked, never did I think I would see the day. Americans using sarcasm, humour and subtely all at the same time. I am much impressed. Anyhow, I know that my ancestors had had a little too much beer that day. Took a quick slash out the back door and BAM, flood. :-D Michael Martin Pegasystems Pty Ltd Australia martm@pegasystems.com +61 413-004-018 "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
You sir, are a cad! Expect to hear from my lawyers, regarding damages suffered during the "Great Urine Excess" of 4000 BCE, which you have just admitted liability for... ----------------------- Reg : "Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it's the meek who are the problem."
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You sir, are a cad! Expect to hear from my lawyers, regarding damages suffered during the "Great Urine Excess" of 4000 BCE, which you have just admitted liability for... ----------------------- Reg : "Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it's the meek who are the problem."
Won't hold up in an Australian court. :-D If the US Army, CIA (or other acronym) try and take me back to the US for trial they will fail. Wombats, Koalas and Vegemite will see to that. If by some fluke they get past this I will bring out the native animals with teeth or that are venomous. Black Widows, Rattlesnakes and Scorpions are nothing on what we have over here. That includes beer. :laugh: Michael Martin Pegasystems Pty Ltd Australia martm@pegasystems.com +61 413-004-018 "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
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This is my theory as to how the flood story came about 1 day in the early days of Man - a hunter-gather came across some fossils of fish high in the hills. He took these to his local Shaman (or whatever the highest religious representitive (RR) was at the time). And said to them - 'I found these high in the hills, how can this be when we know that fish swim in the lakes'. And being a bright person, and not missing a chance to make sure everyone was in fear of the gods and in turn him, the local RR made up a wonderful story about god drowning the world to teach naughty followers a lesson and thus explain away how fossils ended up high in the mountains (because it was underwater for a while).
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I have a more important question - what the hell happened to all that water? To hell with those thin-skinned pillow-biters. - Me, 10/03/2001
Got turned into beer. ;P Michael Martin Pegasystems Pty Ltd Australia martm@pegasystems.com +61 413-004-018 "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
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I have a more important question - what the hell happened to all that water? To hell with those thin-skinned pillow-biters. - Me, 10/03/2001
that's what the sponges do. you should know that :) -c ------------------------------ Smaller Animals Software, Inc. http://www.smalleranimals.com
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I have a more important question - what the hell happened to all that water? To hell with those thin-skinned pillow-biters. - Me, 10/03/2001
I quote : Genesis 36:22 And spoketh Noah "Lord, where upon will thine waters flow?". And the Lord did much laugheth, and pulleth He the large plug from the plughole. And sayeth the Lord "see, the waters draineth in a clockwise direction. Calleth this the 'coriolis effect'". I think this pretty much captures the essence of your question. Of course, some bible translations use the more tradional "enormously erect Water Stopping thingy", instead of the now more commonly accepted "large plug". ----------------------- Reg : "Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it's the meek who are the problem."
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OK, I have read all replies to this post prior to my reply. I am shocked, never did I think I would see the day. Americans using sarcasm, humour and subtely all at the same time. I am much impressed. Anyhow, I know that my ancestors had had a little too much beer that day. Took a quick slash out the back door and BAM, flood. :-D Michael Martin Pegasystems Pty Ltd Australia martm@pegasystems.com +61 413-004-018 "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
Someone sent me this the other day (I think it might have come from the Onion - not sure)
Subject: SAN FRANCISCO MAN BECOMES FIRST AMERICAN TO GRASP IRONY. SAN FRANCISCO - The UK Paper The Daily Telegraph spoke to Jay Fullmer, 38, who became the first American to come to grips with the concept of irony yesterday. "It was weird," Fullmer said, "I was in London and, like, talking to this guy and it was raining and stuff and he said, like, great weather, or something like that." Said Fullmer: "And I thought - wait a minute, it's like, no way is it great weather." Fullmer soon realised that the other man's 'mistake' was deliberate. "This guy was pretty cool about it," Fullmer said. Fullmer, who is 39 next month and married with two children, aged 8 and 3, planned to use irony himself in future. "I'm like saying it all the time." he said. "Last weekend I was like grilling steaks and I like burned the crap out of them and I said 'great weather'."
cheers, Chris Maunder (CodeProject)
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Someone sent me this the other day (I think it might have come from the Onion - not sure)
Subject: SAN FRANCISCO MAN BECOMES FIRST AMERICAN TO GRASP IRONY. SAN FRANCISCO - The UK Paper The Daily Telegraph spoke to Jay Fullmer, 38, who became the first American to come to grips with the concept of irony yesterday. "It was weird," Fullmer said, "I was in London and, like, talking to this guy and it was raining and stuff and he said, like, great weather, or something like that." Said Fullmer: "And I thought - wait a minute, it's like, no way is it great weather." Fullmer soon realised that the other man's 'mistake' was deliberate. "This guy was pretty cool about it," Fullmer said. Fullmer, who is 39 next month and married with two children, aged 8 and 3, planned to use irony himself in future. "I'm like saying it all the time." he said. "Last weekend I was like grilling steaks and I like burned the crap out of them and I said 'great weather'."
cheers, Chris Maunder (CodeProject)
Brilliant! In my best Rick from the Young Ones voice. This should be included in the humour part of the site. Michael Martin Pegasystems Pty Ltd Australia martm@pegasystems.com +61 413-004-018 "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
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I have a more important question - what the hell happened to all that water? To hell with those thin-skinned pillow-biters. - Me, 10/03/2001
Polar Ice Caps? ;P -Sean ---- "Vigilance With Pride"
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Actually, the flood did happen. Noah did build his boat and filled it full of animals. This is very important because it did save the world from total wipeout. The part of the story that is never told is that on the day of the flood, they actually had the first ever Superbowl. Unfortunately, when halftime came and everyone hit the bathroom at the same time, the primitive sewage system couldn't handle the stress and thus the great flood. Tim Smith Descartes Systems Sciences, Inc.
I was accused of being an Heretic the first time I asked an American "What the hell is the SuperBowl?". :) regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa "We would accomplish many more things if we did not think of them as impossible." - Chretien Malesherbes
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I was accused of being an Heretic the first time I asked an American "What the hell is the SuperBowl?". :) regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa "We would accomplish many more things if we did not think of them as impossible." - Chretien Malesherbes
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I have a more important question - what the hell happened to all that water? To hell with those thin-skinned pillow-biters. - Me, 10/03/2001
Well, hell had nothing to do with it.. :P Ever heard of oceans? John
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Blasphemy!! This cannot be so. It's too logical, explains far too many things, and is presented in clear and unambiguous language. You need to rethink this entire story, add in a little more killing and threats of retribution, retell it verbally through several generations, then write it down in ancient greek on a parchment that will not last long enough to be found by anyone in later years, then ask many people to copy it, adding and embellishing as they see fit. Only then will you understand the true word. ----------------------- Reg : "Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it's the meek who are the problem."
:laugh: My thoughts exactly.
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Someone sent me this the other day (I think it might have come from the Onion - not sure)
Subject: SAN FRANCISCO MAN BECOMES FIRST AMERICAN TO GRASP IRONY. SAN FRANCISCO - The UK Paper The Daily Telegraph spoke to Jay Fullmer, 38, who became the first American to come to grips with the concept of irony yesterday. "It was weird," Fullmer said, "I was in London and, like, talking to this guy and it was raining and stuff and he said, like, great weather, or something like that." Said Fullmer: "And I thought - wait a minute, it's like, no way is it great weather." Fullmer soon realised that the other man's 'mistake' was deliberate. "This guy was pretty cool about it," Fullmer said. Fullmer, who is 39 next month and married with two children, aged 8 and 3, planned to use irony himself in future. "I'm like saying it all the time." he said. "Last weekend I was like grilling steaks and I like burned the crap out of them and I said 'great weather'."
cheers, Chris Maunder (CodeProject)
Hey, isn't irony that thing Alanis Morissette sung about? ;P