Funny Stories from 2001
-
Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin Award if true. Check out The Darwin Awards. They collect all sorts of stories about people removing themselves from the human gene pool in stupid ways. This one could possibly be on there, including the croation student who was juggling hand grenades Paresh Solanki A Completly Random Ordering Never Yields Meaning
Paresh Solanki wrote: Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin Award if true Well apparently this poor Korean did not die. In a lot of pain most likely, but not dead. So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. The Darwin Awards are hilarious though, sick but funny. Our local radio station always reports on them every year. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
-
Paresh Solanki wrote: Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin Award if true Well apparently this poor Korean did not die. In a lot of pain most likely, but not dead. So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. The Darwin Awards are hilarious though, sick but funny. Our local radio station always reports on them every year. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Paul Watson wrote: So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. It would seem, after perusing the Darwin Awards site, as though I am very wrong indeed. :-D I always thought the person in question had to die to be illegible. But as Paresh correctly states and from what the site says all that has to happen is that the person is unable to continue his blood line, i.e. inject there genetic mix back into the gene pool. So having your penis shredded certainly makes it unlikely that he will be fathering any children (though of course I am sure they could extract some sperm or something). So you don't have to die to be a Darwin Award winner :) Shew, what a relief, now I can try and enter.... :laugh: regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
-
Paresh Solanki wrote: Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin Award if true Well apparently this poor Korean did not die. In a lot of pain most likely, but not dead. So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. The Darwin Awards are hilarious though, sick but funny. Our local radio station always reports on them every year. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Paul Watson wrote: Well apparently this poor Korean did not die. In a lot of pain most likely, but not dead. So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. He should, because he can't pass his genes to new humans :) Crivo Automated Credit Assessment
-
Paresh Solanki wrote: Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin Award if true Well apparently this poor Korean did not die. In a lot of pain most likely, but not dead. So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. The Darwin Awards are hilarious though, sick but funny. Our local radio station always reports on them every year. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Death is not the qualification for The Darwin Awards, you can qualify by removing your ability to reproduce and therefore pass on your stupidity genes to your offspring. Death is simply the most common way of achieving this. Paresh Solanki A Completly Random Ordering Never Yields Meaning
-
Paul Watson wrote: So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. It would seem, after perusing the Darwin Awards site, as though I am very wrong indeed. :-D I always thought the person in question had to die to be illegible. But as Paresh correctly states and from what the site says all that has to happen is that the person is unable to continue his blood line, i.e. inject there genetic mix back into the gene pool. So having your penis shredded certainly makes it unlikely that he will be fathering any children (though of course I am sure they could extract some sperm or something). So you don't have to die to be a Darwin Award winner :) Shew, what a relief, now I can try and enter.... :laugh: regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Let us know if you make it:) Paresh Solanki A Completly Random Ordering Never Yields Meaning
-
Let us know if you make it:) Paresh Solanki A Completly Random Ordering Never Yields Meaning
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. They placed the message "HE'S LYING" in the copier, and pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed to the police. LMAO! regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
-
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. They placed the message "HE'S LYING" in the copier, and pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed to the police. LMAO! regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Not a recent story, but This ones interesting:- 1994’s Most Bizarre Suicide At the 1994 annual awards dinner given by the American Association for Forensic Science, AAFS President Don Harper Mills astounded his audience in San Diego with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story. “On 23 March 1994, the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound of the head. The decedent had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide (he left a note indicating his despondency). As he fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast through a window, which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the decedent was aware that a safety net had been erected at the eighth floor level to protect some window washers and that Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide anyway because of this.” “Ordinarily,” Dr. Mills continued, “a person who sets out to commit suicide ultimately succeeds, even though the mechanism might not be what he intended.” That Opus was shot on the way to certain death nine stories below probably would not have changed his mode of death from suicide to homicide. But the fact that his suicidal intent would not have been successful caused the medical examiner to feel that he had homicide on his hands. “The room on the ninth floor whence the shotgun blast emanated was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing and he was threatening her with the shotgun. He was so upset that, when he pulled the trigger, he completely missed his wife and the pellets went through the window striking Opus.” “When one intends to kill subject A but kills subject B in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject B.” When confronted with this charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant that neither knew that the shotgun was loaded. The old man said it was his long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her - therefore, the killing of Opus appeared to be an accident. That is, the gun had been accidentally loaded.” “The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple’s son loading the shotgun approximately six weeks prior to the fatal incident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son’s financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded
-
Paul Watson wrote: So he does not qualify for the Darwin Awards. It would seem, after perusing the Darwin Awards site, as though I am very wrong indeed. :-D I always thought the person in question had to die to be illegible. But as Paresh correctly states and from what the site says all that has to happen is that the person is unable to continue his blood line, i.e. inject there genetic mix back into the gene pool. So having your penis shredded certainly makes it unlikely that he will be fathering any children (though of course I am sure they could extract some sperm or something). So you don't have to die to be a Darwin Award winner :) Shew, what a relief, now I can try and enter.... :laugh: regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass Cape Town, South Africa Do you Sonork? I do! 100.9903 Stormfront "The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love, and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Let me know if you need to borrow a shredder...
-
The last Sunday Telegraph (Sydney newspaper) of 2001 had the following stories in an article on amzing (read stupid) stories that happened during last year. MIAMI, Florida: A man who tried to engage a contract killer picked the wrong person - the son of his intended victim. Jose Sasa offered Leandro Pulido money to kill or maim a man who owed him money. When he heard his father's name, Pulido informed police and Sasa was arrested. BORDEAUX, France: Having failed to persuade a post office clerk to hand over a sack of money, a would-be armed robber decided to withdraw cash from his own account. When the clerk explained that he didn't have the large sum the man demanded, he settled for a small amount of cash, handing over his account book and identity card to do so. Police arrested him at home soon afterwards. STOCKHOLM, Sweden: A stone maze, classified as a monument at least 500 years old, turned out to have been built in 1974 by two schoolfriends. Thomas Karlen, now 37, was amazed to discover that a sign had been put up near the structure, in the resort of Grebbestad, claiming it was an archaeological find. He then revealed that, at the age of 11, he and his friend Peter Witt had discovered a pile of stones and made a copy of a maze at a Stockholm theme park. IZMIR, Turkey: A Turkish policeman survived accidently shooting himself in the head as he scratched the side of his face with his service revolver. When the 24-year-old unwittingly pulled the trigger, the bullet went through his right temple and out the other side. Has anyone else seen any other stupid stories that have happened during 2001? Michael Martin Australia mmartin@netspace.net.au "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
An Email I recieved this morning.... > >HOW DO THESE PEOPLE SURVIVE??!!! > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have > >an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. > > "We don't have half dozen nuggets", said the teenager at the counter. > >"You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the > >reply. "So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" > >"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets. > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a few items and the lady > >behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of > >those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between > >our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my > >items, she picked up the divider, looking it all over for the bar code so > >she could scan it. Not finding the bar code, she said to me "Do you know > >how much this is?" I said, "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy > >that today". She said "OK" and I paid her for the things and left. She had > >no clue what had just happened. > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and > >pulling it out very quickly. When asked what she was doing, she said she > >was shopping on the internet and they asked for a credit card number, so > >she was using the "ATM thingy". > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need > >some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the > >battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you > >think they (pointing to a distant convenient store) would have a battery to > >fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked. "No, just > >this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I > >took the key and manually unlocked the door, I said, "Why don't you drive > >over there and check about the batteries? It's a long walk." > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was > >typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. > > What do I do?" "Just use copier machine
-
The last Sunday Telegraph (Sydney newspaper) of 2001 had the following stories in an article on amzing (read stupid) stories that happened during last year. MIAMI, Florida: A man who tried to engage a contract killer picked the wrong person - the son of his intended victim. Jose Sasa offered Leandro Pulido money to kill or maim a man who owed him money. When he heard his father's name, Pulido informed police and Sasa was arrested. BORDEAUX, France: Having failed to persuade a post office clerk to hand over a sack of money, a would-be armed robber decided to withdraw cash from his own account. When the clerk explained that he didn't have the large sum the man demanded, he settled for a small amount of cash, handing over his account book and identity card to do so. Police arrested him at home soon afterwards. STOCKHOLM, Sweden: A stone maze, classified as a monument at least 500 years old, turned out to have been built in 1974 by two schoolfriends. Thomas Karlen, now 37, was amazed to discover that a sign had been put up near the structure, in the resort of Grebbestad, claiming it was an archaeological find. He then revealed that, at the age of 11, he and his friend Peter Witt had discovered a pile of stones and made a copy of a maze at a Stockholm theme park. IZMIR, Turkey: A Turkish policeman survived accidently shooting himself in the head as he scratched the side of his face with his service revolver. When the 24-year-old unwittingly pulled the trigger, the bullet went through his right temple and out the other side. Has anyone else seen any other stupid stories that have happened during 2001? Michael Martin Australia mmartin@netspace.net.au "Don't belong. Never join. Think for yourself. Peace" - Victor Stone
Michael Martin wrote: Has anyone else seen any other stupid stories that have happened during 2001? Check out http://www.newsoftheweird.com. Also This Year's Weirdest News. A list is only as strong as its weakest link. - Don Knuth
-
Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin Award if true. Check out The Darwin Awards. They collect all sorts of stories about people removing themselves from the human gene pool in stupid ways. This one could possibly be on there, including the croation student who was juggling hand grenades Paresh Solanki A Completly Random Ordering Never Yields Meaning
You'd be surprised how many Darwin Awards are also on Urban Myth sites. Christian I have come to clean zee pooollll. - Michael Martin Dec 30, 2001
Sonork ID 100.10002:MeanManOz
I live in Bob's HungOut now