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  3. Salesman - why don't they get it?

Salesman - why don't they get it?

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  • D Offline
    D Offline
    daleofcourse
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

    L N V C realJSOPR 10 Replies Last reply
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    • D daleofcourse

      Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      I don't think the point should be does he not understand what it is, the point is do the potential customers want what he is telling them it is. People want to buy something they have heard of, something they think is good, something they think they need, even (especially) if they have no idea at all what it actually is.

      Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

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      • D daleofcourse

        Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

        N Offline
        N Offline
        Nagy Vilmos
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        0. Buy a baseball bat. 1. Hit the salesman with the baseball bat. 2. If salesman not dead, repeat #1. It is the only accepted way to deal with sales.


        Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

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        • L Lost User

          I don't think the point should be does he not understand what it is, the point is do the potential customers want what he is telling them it is. People want to buy something they have heard of, something they think is good, something they think they need, even (especially) if they have no idea at all what it actually is.

          Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

          R Offline
          R Offline
          Roger Wright
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          In summary, people are idiots.

          Will Rogers never met me.

          N L 2 Replies Last reply
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          • R Roger Wright

            In summary, people are idiots.

            Will Rogers never met me.

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            And a bloody good job too.

            Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • R Roger Wright

              In summary, people are idiots.

              Will Rogers never met me.

              N Offline
              N Offline
              Nagy Vilmos
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Roger Wright wrote:

              people are idiots.

              Salespeople doubly so.


              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

              R 1 Reply Last reply
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              • D daleofcourse

                Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

                V Offline
                V Offline
                Vark111
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                Sales - making pond scum everywhere thankful to be on the second evolutionary rung.

                L 1 Reply Last reply
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                • L Lost User

                  I don't think the point should be does he not understand what it is, the point is do the potential customers want what he is telling them it is. People want to buy something they have heard of, something they think is good, something they think they need, even (especially) if they have no idea at all what it actually is.

                  Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                  D Offline
                  D Offline
                  daleofcourse
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  True, but when clients start demanding services that don't exist because you missold them the product you've got a problem.

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                    Roger Wright wrote:

                    people are idiots.

                    Salespeople doubly so.


                    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett

                    R Offline
                    R Offline
                    Reiss
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                    Salespeople doubly so.

                    Salespeople aren't people.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • D daleofcourse

                      Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

                      C Offline
                      C Offline
                      Chris Losinger
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      salesmen aren't in the business of enforcing pedantic definitions of obscure tech; they're in the business of getting people to hand them cash: by whatever means necessary.

                      image processing toolkits | batch image processing

                      V 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • V Vark111

                        Sales - making pond scum everywhere thankful to be on the second evolutionary rung.

                        L Offline
                        L Offline
                        Lost User
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        Vark111 wrote:

                        Sales - making pond scum everywhere

                        Ever tried it? Ever tried selling? Easy is it? Be very gratefull there are people who CAN do it, a LOT better than you, who generate YOUR salary. Be a bit gratefull eh? We arent all made the same, cant all do the same jobs, but that doesnt make you a higher for, of life.

                        ============================== Nothing to say.

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                        • D daleofcourse

                          Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          Cant you put some of it in the cloud and make his job easier? After all, making money is what you are BOTH there for.

                          ============================== Nothing to say.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • D daleofcourse

                            Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

                            realJSOPR Offline
                            realJSOPR Offline
                            realJSOP
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Salesmen aren't paid to "get it". They're paid to "sell it".

                            ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                            -----
                            You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                            -----
                            "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                            L 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • L Lost User

                              Vark111 wrote:

                              Sales - making pond scum everywhere

                              Ever tried it? Ever tried selling? Easy is it? Be very gratefull there are people who CAN do it, a LOT better than you, who generate YOUR salary. Be a bit gratefull eh? We arent all made the same, cant all do the same jobs, but that doesnt make you a higher for, of life.

                              ============================== Nothing to say.

                              A Offline
                              A Offline
                              Anthony Mushrow
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              I suppose you don't like it when people say similar things about lawyers. These things are said in jest you know, there's no need to get all uppity about it.

                              -SK Genius

                              Vehicle Simulation Demo - New and Improved!

                              L C 2 Replies Last reply
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                              • L Lost User

                                Vark111 wrote:

                                Sales - making pond scum everywhere

                                Ever tried it? Ever tried selling? Easy is it? Be very gratefull there are people who CAN do it, a LOT better than you, who generate YOUR salary. Be a bit gratefull eh? We arent all made the same, cant all do the same jobs, but that doesnt make you a higher for, of life.

                                ============================== Nothing to say.

                                P Offline
                                P Offline
                                Peter Mulholland
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                Oooo. touchy! If I was to guess that you work in sales, would I be wrong?

                                Pete

                                L 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • L Lost User

                                  Vark111 wrote:

                                  Sales - making pond scum everywhere

                                  Ever tried it? Ever tried selling? Easy is it? Be very gratefull there are people who CAN do it, a LOT better than you, who generate YOUR salary. Be a bit gratefull eh? We arent all made the same, cant all do the same jobs, but that doesnt make you a higher for, of life.

                                  ============================== Nothing to say.

                                  V Offline
                                  V Offline
                                  Vark111
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  In fact I have. Wasn't the greatest at it, but could hold my own. Decided to leave after a while because to be honest, I'm not a "people person" and that's a fairly big requirement to be a spectacular sales person. I have the utmost respect for my sales-oriented brethren, but if they try to sell something that doesn't exist I will call them pond scum to their face and they accept it with a smile while calling me nerd back to my face. It's called friendly banter. Maybe you should try it someday with one of your friends.

                                  L 1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • D daleofcourse

                                    Our company has been working on a system that provides a web front end to databases held on our server that's accessible over the internet, we've used it successfully internally and now the sales guys are trying to sell it to external clients and today's big buzzword is "Cloud Computing". It's not cloud computing, it doesn't run in a cloud, we don't offer cloud services, it doesn't even look like a cloud, yet because it's accessible via the web the sales guy keeps sending me select definitions of cloud computing that our system tenuously falls into; no matter what I say he's dead set on selling it as a cloud computing service/platform. :doh: Anyone else had a product that their sales dept completely got the wrong end of the stick with???

                                    P Offline
                                    P Offline
                                    peterchen
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    As long as he sells it, he could sell it as omnipotent multidimensional ashtray from Betelgeutse 3. Only if he sells functionality that isn't in that ashtray you can be pissed. Just make sure you have solid specs that state what you do, and what are the limits, and make sure the customer buys based on the spec, not on the cloud your sales guy produces. --- One might ask, of course, whether adding buzzwords will increase sales.

                                    FILETIME to time_t
                                    | FoldWithUs! | sighist | WhoIncludes - Analyzing C++ include file hierarchy

                                    J 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • A Anthony Mushrow

                                      I suppose you don't like it when people say similar things about lawyers. These things are said in jest you know, there's no need to get all uppity about it.

                                      -SK Genius

                                      Vehicle Simulation Demo - New and Improved!

                                      L Offline
                                      L Offline
                                      Lost User
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      SK Genius wrote:

                                      These things are said in jest you know

                                      I dont see a joke icon, a smily face. I just see developers thinking they are better than sales people.

                                      ============================== Nothing to say.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • P Peter Mulholland

                                        Oooo. touchy! If I was to guess that you work in sales, would I be wrong?

                                        Pete

                                        L Offline
                                        L Offline
                                        Lost User
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        Yeah, a mile out. I am a Windows kernel dev, therefore even more superior to you normal devs. :) I just respect everyones ability and contribution to a firm. As a dev I will bend over backwards to get any fancy feature they want in the product, no fights, no problem, because it makes it sell better and makes us all more money.

                                        ============================== Nothing to say.

                                        P 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • A Anthony Mushrow

                                          I suppose you don't like it when people say similar things about lawyers. These things are said in jest you know, there's no need to get all uppity about it.

                                          -SK Genius

                                          Vehicle Simulation Demo - New and Improved!

                                          C Offline
                                          C Offline
                                          Chris Meech
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          SK Genius wrote:

                                          These things are said in jest you know, there's no need to get all uppity start acting like a troll about it.

                                          FTFY. :)

                                          Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

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