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Funny

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  • D Offline
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    DODO
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    This is funny from Jay Leno show. "As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno "In an interview with Dan Rather, Saddam has challenged President Bush to a live, televised debate. I think this would be fair, since English is a second language to both of them." -Jay Leno "In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education - anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda - and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno Jay Leno is an American as I think "Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio." -Jay Leno La ILah Ila allah Mohamed Rasoul Allah

    J S T realJSOPR L 6 Replies Last reply
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    • D DODO

      This is funny from Jay Leno show. "As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno "In an interview with Dan Rather, Saddam has challenged President Bush to a live, televised debate. I think this would be fair, since English is a second language to both of them." -Jay Leno "In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education - anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda - and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno Jay Leno is an American as I think "Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio." -Jay Leno La ILah Ila allah Mohamed Rasoul Allah

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      Jorgen Sigvardsson
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      :laugh::laugh: -- Shine, enlighten me - shine Shine, awaken me - shine Shine for all your suffering - shine

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • D DODO

        This is funny from Jay Leno show. "As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno "In an interview with Dan Rather, Saddam has challenged President Bush to a live, televised debate. I think this would be fair, since English is a second language to both of them." -Jay Leno "In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education - anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda - and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno Jay Leno is an American as I think "Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio." -Jay Leno La ILah Ila allah Mohamed Rasoul Allah

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        S Becker
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        Good. Two other funny things i read: "Drop Bush, not bombs!" and "The US only ignored the UN to show Sadam what happens if you ignore the UN." Regards Sascha

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        • D DODO

          This is funny from Jay Leno show. "As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno "In an interview with Dan Rather, Saddam has challenged President Bush to a live, televised debate. I think this would be fair, since English is a second language to both of them." -Jay Leno "In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education - anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda - and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno Jay Leno is an American as I think "Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio." -Jay Leno La ILah Ila allah Mohamed Rasoul Allah

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          Tim Smith
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          Here is some real funny stuff. Just had me bursting out almost to tears. Political prisoners and detainees were subjected to brutal forms of torture. The bodies of many of those executed had visible signs of torture, including the gouging out of the eyes, when they were returned to their families. Common methods of physical torture included electric shocks or cigarette burns to various parts of the body, pulling out of fingernails, rape, long periods of suspension by the limbs, beating with cables, falaqa (beating on the soles of the feet) and piercing of hands with an electric drill. Psychological torture included threats to arrest and harm relatives of the detainee or to rape a female relative in front of the detainee, mock executions and long periods in solitary confinement. In June Najib al-Salihi, a former army general who fled Iraq in 1995 and joined the Iraqi opposition, was sent a videotape showing the rape of a female relative. Shortly afterwards he reportedly received a telephone call from the Iraqi intelligence service, asking him whether he had received the gift and informing him that his relative was in their custody. Amputation of the tongue was reportedly approved by the authorities in mid-2000 as a new penalty for slander or abusive remarks about the President or his family. In September a man reportedly had his tongue amputated by members of Feda'iyye Saddam in Baghdad for slandering the President. He was said to have been driven around after the punishment while information about his alleged offence was broadcast through a loudspeaker. Tim Smith I'm going to patent thought. I have yet to see any prior art.

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          • T Tim Smith

            Here is some real funny stuff. Just had me bursting out almost to tears. Political prisoners and detainees were subjected to brutal forms of torture. The bodies of many of those executed had visible signs of torture, including the gouging out of the eyes, when they were returned to their families. Common methods of physical torture included electric shocks or cigarette burns to various parts of the body, pulling out of fingernails, rape, long periods of suspension by the limbs, beating with cables, falaqa (beating on the soles of the feet) and piercing of hands with an electric drill. Psychological torture included threats to arrest and harm relatives of the detainee or to rape a female relative in front of the detainee, mock executions and long periods in solitary confinement. In June Najib al-Salihi, a former army general who fled Iraq in 1995 and joined the Iraqi opposition, was sent a videotape showing the rape of a female relative. Shortly afterwards he reportedly received a telephone call from the Iraqi intelligence service, asking him whether he had received the gift and informing him that his relative was in their custody. Amputation of the tongue was reportedly approved by the authorities in mid-2000 as a new penalty for slander or abusive remarks about the President or his family. In September a man reportedly had his tongue amputated by members of Feda'iyye Saddam in Baghdad for slandering the President. He was said to have been driven around after the punishment while information about his alleged offence was broadcast through a loudspeaker. Tim Smith I'm going to patent thought. I have yet to see any prior art.

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            besmel
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            are you talking about Guantalamo Bay ? for this reason you should bomb yourself

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            • D DODO

              This is funny from Jay Leno show. "As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno "In an interview with Dan Rather, Saddam has challenged President Bush to a live, televised debate. I think this would be fair, since English is a second language to both of them." -Jay Leno "In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education - anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda - and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno Jay Leno is an American as I think "Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio." -Jay Leno La ILah Ila allah Mohamed Rasoul Allah

              realJSOPR Offline
              realJSOPR Offline
              realJSOP
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              Stop posting anti-American bullshit. You'd be pretty damned surprised at how friendly most of us can be (or how easy it is to stay off our radar) when you're not being a fuckin' dipshit. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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              • realJSOPR realJSOP

                Stop posting anti-American bullshit. You'd be pretty damned surprised at how friendly most of us can be (or how easy it is to stay off our radar) when you're not being a fuckin' dipshit. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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                Jorgen Sigvardsson
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                The posters intentions were clearly anti-american, but disregarding that, Leno is pretty darn funny. Not even you can dispute that ;) -- Shine, enlighten me - shine Shine, awaken me - shine Shine for all your suffering - shine

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                • realJSOPR realJSOP

                  Stop posting anti-American bullshit. You'd be pretty damned surprised at how friendly most of us can be (or how easy it is to stay off our radar) when you're not being a fuckin' dipshit. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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                  David Wulff
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  Go outside, take a walk around, maybe have a beer or three, then come back in and try again. You're picking a fight with the poster not what was posted - you can do that privately thank you.


                  David Wulff

                  "Somebody get this freakin' duck away from me!" - Strong Bad [^]

                  J J realJSOPR 3 Replies Last reply
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                  • D David Wulff

                    Go outside, take a walk around, maybe have a beer or three, then come back in and try again. You're picking a fight with the poster not what was posted - you can do that privately thank you.


                    David Wulff

                    "Somebody get this freakin' duck away from me!" - Strong Bad [^]

                    J Offline
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                    Jorgen Sigvardsson
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Hehe, your're just pissed at John, aren't you? Maybe you should go get a beer too..? ;) -- Shine, enlighten me - shine Shine, awaken me - shine Shine for all your suffering - shine

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                    • J Jorgen Sigvardsson

                      Hehe, your're just pissed at John, aren't you? Maybe you should go get a beer too..? ;) -- Shine, enlighten me - shine Shine, awaken me - shine Shine for all your suffering - shine

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                      David Wulff
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Hehe, your're just pissed at John, aren't you? Lol, no. I wouldn't waste the effort. :rolleyes: Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Maybe you should go get a beer too..? Now that I will take you up on, so long as you are buying? ;P


                      David Wulff

                      "Somebody get this freakin' duck away from me!" - Strong Bad [^]

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                      • D David Wulff

                        Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Hehe, your're just pissed at John, aren't you? Lol, no. I wouldn't waste the effort. :rolleyes: Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: Maybe you should go get a beer too..? Now that I will take you up on, so long as you are buying? ;P


                        David Wulff

                        "Somebody get this freakin' duck away from me!" - Strong Bad [^]

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                        Jorgen Sigvardsson
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        David Wulff wrote: Now that I will take you up on, so long as you are buying? Hmm.. how much beer can you drink before you pass out? *checking wallet* :rolleyes: -- Shine, enlighten me - shine Shine, awaken me - shine Shine for all your suffering - shine

                        D 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • D DODO

                          This is funny from Jay Leno show. "As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil, it's about gasoline." -Jay Leno "In an interview with Dan Rather, Saddam has challenged President Bush to a live, televised debate. I think this would be fair, since English is a second language to both of them." -Jay Leno "In a speech earlier today President Bush said if Iraq gets rid of Saddam Hussein, he will help the Iraqi people with food, medicine, supplies, housing, education - anything that's needed. Isn't that amazing? He finally comes up with a domestic agenda - and it's for Iraq. Maybe we could bring that here if it works out." -Jay Leno Jay Leno is an American as I think "Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he heard that, President Bush agreed and announced plans to bomb Ohio." -Jay Leno La ILah Ila allah Mohamed Rasoul Allah

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          I have one comment worth considering. Why are so many Iraqis glad to see their country invaded ? Ok, another comment. A protester in London was asked why he was protesting against the war. It turns out he is Iraqi, born in the same town as Saddam Hussein. His complaints included support by external governments for SH in the past, and resentement that the job wasn't finished in 1991. The tigress is here :-D

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                          • D David Wulff

                            Go outside, take a walk around, maybe have a beer or three, then come back in and try again. You're picking a fight with the poster not what was posted - you can do that privately thank you.


                            David Wulff

                            "Somebody get this freakin' duck away from me!" - Strong Bad [^]

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                            J Offline
                            JoeSox
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            David Wulff wrote: Go outside, take a walk around, maybe have a beer or three why walk around and go outside? Just pull out the beers:beer: :-D:laugh::laugh: Later,
                            JoeSox
                            www.joeswammi.com
                            USN Veteran 94-98[^]

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                            • realJSOPR realJSOP

                              Stop posting anti-American bullshit. You'd be pretty damned surprised at how friendly most of us can be (or how easy it is to stay off our radar) when you're not being a fuckin' dipshit. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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                              JoeSox
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: Stop posting anti-American bullshit. I see nothing wrong with calling a spade a spade. Good job John:-D Later,
                              JoeSox
                              www.joeswammi.com
                              USN Veteran 94-98[^]

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • J Jorgen Sigvardsson

                                David Wulff wrote: Now that I will take you up on, so long as you are buying? Hmm.. how much beer can you drink before you pass out? *checking wallet* :rolleyes: -- Shine, enlighten me - shine Shine, awaken me - shine Shine for all your suffering - shine

                                D Offline
                                D Offline
                                David Wulff
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                £7.50 normally does it. Enough for a bottle of meths and the taxi ride to the hospital. :-O


                                David Wulff

                                "Somebody get this freakin' duck away from me!" - Strong Bad [^]

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                  Stop posting anti-American bullshit. You'd be pretty damned surprised at how friendly most of us can be (or how easy it is to stay off our radar) when you're not being a fuckin' dipshit. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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                                  C Offline
                                  Christian Graus
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  I've often commented about the fact that the USA is the only country in the world that can't take a joke directed at itself. If something about Australia was posted that was as funny as this is ( perhaps criticising the whole boat people affair, for example ), I would be laughing along with all the Yanks who freak out when it's THEIR country that's the butt of a joke. And unless I miss my guess, the jokes were actually written by an American as well. But I must admit in this case a lot of Yanks probably feel a little embattled. What with you guys starting a war that the population of the world does not want and all. Christian NO MATTER HOW MUCH BIG IS THE WORD SIZE ,THE DATA MUCT BE TRANSPORTED INTO THE CPU. - Vinod Sharma Anonymous wrote: OK. I read a c++ book. Or...a bit of it anyway. I'm sick of that evil looking console window. I think you are a good candidate for Visual Basic. - Nemanja Trifunovic

                                  realJSOPR 1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • L Lost User

                                    I have one comment worth considering. Why are so many Iraqis glad to see their country invaded ? Ok, another comment. A protester in London was asked why he was protesting against the war. It turns out he is Iraqi, born in the same town as Saddam Hussein. His complaints included support by external governments for SH in the past, and resentement that the job wasn't finished in 1991. The tigress is here :-D

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                                    B Offline
                                    Bedri Egrilmez
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    Don't believe in everything you see. We are living in strange times. Read this

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • L Lost User

                                      I have one comment worth considering. Why are so many Iraqis glad to see their country invaded ? Ok, another comment. A protester in London was asked why he was protesting against the war. It turns out he is Iraqi, born in the same town as Saddam Hussein. His complaints included support by external governments for SH in the past, and resentement that the job wasn't finished in 1991. The tigress is here :-D

                                      L Offline
                                      L Offline
                                      Lost User
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      That is not the point. This clearly sets an international precedent for pre-emptive strike as a legitimate option; and may be the start of a disastrous period in human history. My article on a reference-counted smart pointer that supports polymorphic objects and raw pointers

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                                      • C Christian Graus

                                        I've often commented about the fact that the USA is the only country in the world that can't take a joke directed at itself. If something about Australia was posted that was as funny as this is ( perhaps criticising the whole boat people affair, for example ), I would be laughing along with all the Yanks who freak out when it's THEIR country that's the butt of a joke. And unless I miss my guess, the jokes were actually written by an American as well. But I must admit in this case a lot of Yanks probably feel a little embattled. What with you guys starting a war that the population of the world does not want and all. Christian NO MATTER HOW MUCH BIG IS THE WORD SIZE ,THE DATA MUCT BE TRANSPORTED INTO THE CPU. - Vinod Sharma Anonymous wrote: OK. I read a c++ book. Or...a bit of it anyway. I'm sick of that evil looking console window. I think you are a good candidate for Visual Basic. - Nemanja Trifunovic

                                        realJSOPR Offline
                                        realJSOPR Offline
                                        realJSOP
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        I can take a joke as well as anyone else, but these assholes are wearing out their welcome. The only thing they post is anti-american. I DEFY you to point out otherwise. I'm tired of their fucked up little games, and I will NOT sit idly by while they continue to press the subject, I don't give a good goddamn how fucking funny a joke is. Enough is fuckin enough. This is a PROGRAMMERS board, not a goddamn podium where everyone is free to continually spout bullshit about something they either know nothing AT ALL about, or when they have their own purile little agendas. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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                                        • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                          I can take a joke as well as anyone else, but these assholes are wearing out their welcome. The only thing they post is anti-american. I DEFY you to point out otherwise. I'm tired of their fucked up little games, and I will NOT sit idly by while they continue to press the subject, I don't give a good goddamn how fucking funny a joke is. Enough is fuckin enough. This is a PROGRAMMERS board, not a goddamn podium where everyone is free to continually spout bullshit about something they either know nothing AT ALL about, or when they have their own purile little agendas. ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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                                          C Offline
                                          Christian Graus
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          As I said, while I note this tendency in residents of the USA, I'd have to agree that there has been a lot of anti US stuff, and the whole war thing is getting tired here. People should really discuss it elsewhere. Especially when CNN is showing pictures of US troops in Iraqi hands, some of which were apparently executed. That's enough to make anyone feel upset by any criticism, and makes it a good time for the anti folks to shut up. At least that's how I feel. Christian NO MATTER HOW MUCH BIG IS THE WORD SIZE ,THE DATA MUCT BE TRANSPORTED INTO THE CPU. - Vinod Sharma Anonymous wrote: OK. I read a c++ book. Or...a bit of it anyway. I'm sick of that evil looking console window. I think you are a good candidate for Visual Basic. - Nemanja Trifunovic

                                          realJSOPR 1 Reply Last reply
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