You wrote: it's so improbable that it has never happened anywhere and never will. A bit of nit picking: how does "so improbable that ... never will" differ from impossible? Impossible and improbable aren't the same thing either.

I like "Thinking in C++" by Bruce Eckel. He assumess a reader working from C to C++, so it might be pedantic on OO concepts, but at least it won't spend much time on fundamental C syntax.