I think our disagreement is semantic. I'm just aware (from code I've had to support) that some people think that when controlling another object it is acceptable to break what should be appropriate levels of responsibility. 'Coordinate' prompts people to ask what is meant, compared to control. And can help thinking about appropriate levels of interaction between objects. "Ask that object to save itself", rather than "save that object." Collaboration rather than management. Coordination and cooperation, rather than control.
Matt Lacey