Amazing, almost like what you just wrote there made me realize hypothetically this; "I have been a prisoner, spent my time in a cell. Its been so obvious I never even touched the cell door. It has never been locked, never was I a prisoner but my own." Quoting you, opening the door and asking someone outside "Why am I here?" I am told "Its your home." I remember a discussion once about locked doors and the truth they more often lock the one inside in not the outside out. Now knowing this, why would I fear of not being accepted because only I need to accept for myself. Most of you who replied to me, you speak of wisdom! Advices to connect just as is and take distance from the obvious, its all in there between the lines! Even JSOP's reply says the same thing. I HAVE found where.