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  3. Impossible? It's a freaking computer for god sake!

Impossible? It's a freaking computer for god sake!

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • L leckey 0

    So what other qualities do you plan on lying about????

    _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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    E Offline
    El Corazon
    wrote on last edited by
    #15

    leckey wrote:

    So what other qualities do you plan on lying about?

    I think it would be easier to ask for the reverse... what qualities does he plan on NOT lying about.

    _________________________ Asu no koto o ieba, tenjo de nezumi ga warau. Talk about things of tomorrow and the mice in the ceiling laugh. (Japanese Proverb)

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    • L Link2006

      I asked if you can make yourself look thinner by the magic of photoshop, and people said it couldn't be done! Of course it can be done! Anything is possible in the digital world. I mean they are just 1 and 0 afterall. From thin to fat: http://www.vincentchow.net/836/photoshop-edited-from-thin-to-fat[^] From fat to thin: http://cravingideas.blogs.com/backinskinnyjeans/2006/08/katie_couric_sh.html[^] Now that gave me hope, I'm going to do some more research on google. ;)

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      Shog9 0
      wrote on last edited by
      #16

      Link2006 wrote:

      I asked if you can make yourself look thinner by the magic of photoshop, and people said it couldn't be done!

      Of course they did. See, Photoshop doesn't have magic. Just a set of tools. Can you use the tools to tweak the apparent weight of the person in a photo? Maybe, if you have the skill and experience. Heck, with enough skill you might be able to pull it off freehand with an air brush. But no, there's no magic "make subject look thinner" button in PS. It's just a (very good) set of tools.

      ----

      It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.

      --Raymond Chen on MSDN

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      • L leckey 0

        So what other qualities do you plan on lying about????

        _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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        S Offline
        Shog9 0
        wrote on last edited by
        #17

        ...I expect he'll give himself a huge, poofy haircut as the follow-up. Chicks dig guys with giant 'fros, right?

        ----

        It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.

        --Raymond Chen on MSDN

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        • S Shog9 0

          ...I expect he'll give himself a huge, poofy haircut as the follow-up. Chicks dig guys with giant 'fros, right?

          ----

          It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.

          --Raymond Chen on MSDN

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          leckey 0
          wrote on last edited by
          #18

          Uh, no. I'm Jewish and even I hate Jewfros.

          _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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          • E El Corazon

            leckey wrote:

            So what other qualities do you plan on lying about?

            I think it would be easier to ask for the reverse... what qualities does he plan on NOT lying about.

            _________________________ Asu no koto o ieba, tenjo de nezumi ga warau. Talk about things of tomorrow and the mice in the ceiling laugh. (Japanese Proverb)

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            L Offline
            leckey 0
            wrote on last edited by
            #19

            I'm betting he doesn't even give his real name. Actually, he'll probably use a picture of someone else.

            _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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            • C code frog 0

              Hah! I was waiting for you to show up. Let's code on on-line dating service called "Liars Love". You and I can get rich and laugh ourselves to tears. My wife and your husband can screen applications, only the most outrageous get in and you and I can code the environment. "Liars Love" founded in 2007 has been a huge success. Founder and cofounder now live happily ever after with their significant others in any tropical destination they choose. (All a lie of course.:-D)

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              leckey 0
              wrote on last edited by
              #20

              A guy I used to know wanted to start an online dating service. His tagline... We make dating easy so you don't have to be. hey, I want to screen applications, too! I need a laugh...

              _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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              • L Link2006

                I asked if you can make yourself look thinner by the magic of photoshop, and people said it couldn't be done! Of course it can be done! Anything is possible in the digital world. I mean they are just 1 and 0 afterall. From thin to fat: http://www.vincentchow.net/836/photoshop-edited-from-thin-to-fat[^] From fat to thin: http://cravingideas.blogs.com/backinskinnyjeans/2006/08/katie_couric_sh.html[^] Now that gave me hope, I'm going to do some more research on google. ;)

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                leckey 0
                wrote on last edited by
                #21

                How about using the time in Photoshop to do some self-assesment? Take a self-improvement course. Or 20. I'm sure if they saw your posts they'd let you join for free.

                _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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                • L leckey 0

                  A guy I used to know wanted to start an online dating service. His tagline... We make dating easy so you don't have to be. hey, I want to screen applications, too! I need a laugh...

                  _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

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                  code frog 0
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #22

                  Your first application was started just a few threads down and it's resuming here in this thread. If you aren't laughing yet just wait. It gets better...:-D

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                  • S Shog9 0

                    ...I expect he'll give himself a huge, poofy haircut as the follow-up. Chicks dig guys with giant 'fros, right?

                    ----

                    It appears that everybody is under the impression that I approve of the documentation. You probably also blame Ken Burns for supporting slavery.

                    --Raymond Chen on MSDN

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                    code frog 0
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #23

                    That's how I met my wife. Huge fro, straight up! Word!:rolleyes:

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                    • C code frog 0

                      I also just wanted to add this. When you find the right girl it won't be this hard. If it's *this* hard you'll never find her. You gotta relax. Women can read desparation like blind people read brail. Yes it's that obvious to them. If your willing to photoshop then your going to come across in other areas equally desparate. Kick back, relax. Get a dog and go for a lot of walks to coffee shops that are kind of far away. Chicks dig dogs, walking and coffee. Your butt will shrink. You'll get a fresh perspective on life and it will be good for you in ways you cannot imagine. Get a membership at a health club and be social. Where I go to work out it's the chattiest dang place on earth. I swear... It seems like everyone is trying to score on everyone or they are just *really* good friends. But you'll find health clubs are a great place to meet people. Pick a hobby that requires classes and that you would enjoy. Photography is one of the best examples and I know so many people who've bought a decent camera, taken some classes, met some like minded people and hit it off. Same with mountaineering. Get some climbing gear (no you don't have to tackle Hood or Everest) and take some climbing classes. There's a ton of healthy social ways to advertise yourself, drop some weight and do it all in a healthy way that will *just* work. Photoshop just seems like mixing drano with flour and hoping it turns out like cocaine. It's just not going to work no matter what you do and you'll hurt yourself if you aren't careful.

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                      L Offline
                      Link2006
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #24

                      code-frog wrote:

                      Kick back, relax. Get a dog and go for a lot of walks to coffee shops that are kind of far away. Chicks dig dogs, walking and coffee. Your butt will shrink. You'll get a fresh perspective on life and it will be good for you in ways you cannot imagine.

                      If it's that easy, life wouldn't have to be that hard! Also, for the record, I'm not desparete, I just wanted to learn a few new tricks with photoshop, and see if I can do it. ;)

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                      • L Link2006

                        code-frog wrote:

                        Kick back, relax. Get a dog and go for a lot of walks to coffee shops that are kind of far away. Chicks dig dogs, walking and coffee. Your butt will shrink. You'll get a fresh perspective on life and it will be good for you in ways you cannot imagine.

                        If it's that easy, life wouldn't have to be that hard! Also, for the record, I'm not desparete, I just wanted to learn a few new tricks with photoshop, and see if I can do it. ;)

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                        code frog 0
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #25

                        Well I can understand the photoshop part. Honestly, I don't think meeting people is hard. You just have start meeting them and being social. I agree that sounds easier than it is but it's something you practice over and over and suddenly your pretty good at it. Anyway, not a big deal and good luck with whatever it is you are up to. When you finally find Mrs. Right I want to know what you thought of the effort you had to put into meeting and matching up with her.

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                        • L Link2006

                          I asked if you can make yourself look thinner by the magic of photoshop, and people said it couldn't be done! Of course it can be done! Anything is possible in the digital world. I mean they are just 1 and 0 afterall. From thin to fat: http://www.vincentchow.net/836/photoshop-edited-from-thin-to-fat[^] From fat to thin: http://cravingideas.blogs.com/backinskinnyjeans/2006/08/katie_couric_sh.html[^] Now that gave me hope, I'm going to do some more research on google. ;)

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                          P Offline
                          peterchen
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #26

                          It still doesn't make yourself look slimmer, only your photo ;P


                          Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Velopers, Develprs, Developers!
                          We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
                          Linkify!|Fold With Us!

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                          • R Roger Wright

                            The first link just proves that inside every morbidly obese chick is a bombshell waiting to be set free. Think of the potential, not to mention improving your odds...:-D

                            "...a photo album is like Life, but flat and stuck to pages." - Shog9

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                            P Offline
                            peterchen
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #27

                            ...just lock her up in the basement, and don't feed her? She'll love you for the basement diet!


                            Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Velopers, Develprs, Developers!
                            We are a big screwed up dysfunctional psychotic happy family - some more screwed up, others more happy, but everybody's psychotic joint venture definition of CP
                            Linkify!|Fold With Us!

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              How much do you weigh and how tall are you?

                              █▒▒▒▒▒██▒█▒██ █▒█████▒▒▒▒▒█ █▒██████▒█▒██ █▒█████▒▒▒▒▒█ █▒▒▒▒▒██▒█▒██

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                              G Offline
                              Gary Wheeler
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #28

                              Too much and not enough, obviously.


                              Software Zen: delete this;

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                              0
                              • L leckey 0

                                So what other qualities do you plan on lying about????

                                _________________________________________ You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

                                G Offline
                                G Offline
                                Gary Wheeler
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #29

                                leckey wrote:

                                You can't fix stupid, but you can medicate crazy.

                                :cool:


                                Software Zen: delete this;

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • L Link2006

                                  I need to come up with a pic fast, so photoshop first, then diet and execrise. Wish me luck! :)

                                  realJSOPR Offline
                                  realJSOPR Offline
                                  realJSOP
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #30

                                  I've said it before, and I'll say it again - you're a fucking idiot.

                                  "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
                                  -----
                                  "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Link2006

                                    I asked if you can make yourself look thinner by the magic of photoshop, and people said it couldn't be done! Of course it can be done! Anything is possible in the digital world. I mean they are just 1 and 0 afterall. From thin to fat: http://www.vincentchow.net/836/photoshop-edited-from-thin-to-fat[^] From fat to thin: http://cravingideas.blogs.com/backinskinnyjeans/2006/08/katie_couric_sh.html[^] Now that gave me hope, I'm going to do some more research on google. ;)

                                    R Offline
                                    R Offline
                                    ricecake
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #31

                                    You don't need Photoshop anymore, just buy an HP camera: http://www.hp.com/united-states/consumer/digital_photography/tours/slimming/index_f.html[^]

                                    -- Marcus Kwok

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