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Nine year anniversary

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  • L leckey 0

    I grew up in a very small closed-off community where I remember being in middle school (6 to 8th grades) and a boy thought you could get a girl pregnant from, um, fellatio (spelling?). I honestly learned about sex because we had HBO and I had no set time for going to bed. This is still an area where you should not have sex until you are married (although most don't) yet they don't really explain what "sex" is so kids experiment and get pregnant or get STDs. This is one area where I think the internet has actually helped kids explore their curiosities.

    I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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    Member 96
    wrote on last edited by
    #48

    leckey wrote:

    This is one area where I think the internet has actually helped kids explore their curiosities.

    Yeah I was going to say *exactly* the same thing. The best gift any teacher can give a child these days is the ability to use the internet and the critical thinking skills to separate factual information from the slew of bogus information then get out of the way.


    "The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do." - Walter Bagehot

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    • J Jim Crafton

      I've found deep breaths, valium, and exhaustive exercise to help greatly. Also a rigorous refusal on my part to apply the rules of logic to most conversations I have with my wife also greatly reduces my stress. In addition an avoidance of any conversation about the true meaning of the words "sales", "savings", and the phrase "look how much I saved" has also contributed to our marital bliss.

      ¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! Real Mentats use only 100% pure, unfooled around with Sapho Juice(tm)! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! VCF Blog

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      leckey 0
      wrote on last edited by
      #49

      I'd agree, but I'm not a normal girl. I'm a computer programmer. I don't understand my own species gender. I know I can be a girly irrational bastard, but my husband, having grown up with women, knows how to deal with it. Part of my routine: A guy goes into a store, sees a coat on sale and thinks to himself, "You know, I could use a new coat for those four winter months. Mine is worn and I could shovel the sidewalk quicker in a coat like that." The girl says to herself, "OMG that cute coat is on sale! I know it's March and it won't be until November before I could wear it and it might be out of style by then but it also matches those shoes I bought a couple weeks ago blah blah blah..."

      I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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      • L leckey 0

        I'd agree, but I'm not a normal girl. I'm a computer programmer. I don't understand my own species gender. I know I can be a girly irrational bastard, but my husband, having grown up with women, knows how to deal with it. Part of my routine: A guy goes into a store, sees a coat on sale and thinks to himself, "You know, I could use a new coat for those four winter months. Mine is worn and I could shovel the sidewalk quicker in a coat like that." The girl says to herself, "OMG that cute coat is on sale! I know it's March and it won't be until November before I could wear it and it might be out of style by then but it also matches those shoes I bought a couple weeks ago blah blah blah..."

        I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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        Jim Crafton
        wrote on last edited by
        #50

        leckey wrote:

        sees a coat on sale

        There's the part you missed - I'd argue most guys never even see the sale sign. We need an item. We find the item. We determine if we have enough money. We buy the item (or not). For the most part.

        ¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! Real Mentats use only 100% pure, unfooled around with Sapho Juice(tm)! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! VCF Blog

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        • L leckey 0

          Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

          Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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          Tom Delany
          wrote on last edited by
          #51

          Next year will be 20 years for my wife and I. We dated for something like 5 or 6 years before we got married. My best advice: You have to keep trying. A lot of people give up too easily. No one ever agrees on everything. You both have to be flexible. The advice about listening all of the time (even when you think they are wrong/stupid) is good. Pick your battles carefully. IMHO, 90% of what married couples end up fighting over is not worth it. I ask myself, "Is it going to matter 6 months from now? A year? 5 years?" Most of the time the answer is no. Good luck and congrats.

          WE ARE DYSLEXIC OF BORG. Refutance is systile. Your a$$ will be laminated.

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          • L leckey 0

            At least you can find something positive out of the experience; most don't.

            I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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            RichardM1
            wrote on last edited by
            #52

            The other thing I thank her for (not to her face, but you know) is that she kept putting off having kids. I have not seen or heard from her in 12 years (see below). I thank her that she kept the cut clean by not having any kids with me that lived. I know people who have to deal with their exes on an ongoing basis. The last time I had anything to do with her was when the security folks asked me where she lived ( for a 5-year update). The first time, I found out and told them. Since them, I told them that if it was so important they know, they can look for her themselves.

            Silver member by constant and unflinching longevity.

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            • L leckey 0

              Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

              Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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              Marc Clifton
              wrote on last edited by
              #53

              Here's a thought. I'm curious if you agree or not. We fall in love with another person often because of the strengths that person has, but in reality, it's the weaknesses in our partner that we must love the most. Marc

              Thyme In The Country Interacx My Blog

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              • L leckey 0

                Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

                Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

                Steve EcholsS Offline
                Steve EcholsS Offline
                Steve Echols
                wrote on last edited by
                #54

                Congrats! Coming up on 12 years now. We've had our ups and downs (mostly ups), but the thing I've learned the most is to bite my tongue, and if I fail on that, don't go to bed angry.


                - S 50 cups of coffee and you know it's on!

                • S
                  50 cups of coffee and you know it's on!
                  Code, follow, or get out of the way.
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                • T Thunderbox666

                  Marriage is not a word, it is a sentence!! No advice here as I'm not married, but Congrats :)


                  "There are three sides to every story. Yours, mine and the truth" ~ unknown "All things good to know are difficult to learn" ~ Greek Proverb "The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary" ~ Vidal Sassoon

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                  Ashley van Gerven
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #55

                  Tom Delany wrote:

                  Marriage is not a word, it is a sentence!!

                  And if you're unlucky (or just bad at choices), it's a *death* sentence :-D

                  "For fifty bucks I'd put my face in their soup and blow." - George Costanza

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                  • L leckey 0

                    It's strange in rural areas like where I live though. Six months seems like more than enough time for some to decide to get married.

                    I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                    Christian Graus
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #56

                    Strange for people in rural areas to do that, or not strange for them ? Which were you ?

                    Christian Graus Please read this if you don't understand the answer I've given you "also I don't think "TranslateOneToTwoBillion OneHundredAndFortySevenMillion FourHundredAndEightyThreeThousand SixHundredAndFortySeven()" is a very good choice for a function name" - SpacixOne ( offering help to someone who really needed it ) ( spaces added for the benefit of people running at < 1280x1024 )

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                    • L leckey 0

                      A very positive attitude; many would not feel the same so I applaude you.

                      I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                      Christian Graus
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #57

                      Several people in my life have assumed I'd be consumed with bitter hatred over it, but, life's too short.

                      Christian Graus Please read this if you don't understand the answer I've given you "also I don't think "TranslateOneToTwoBillion OneHundredAndFortySevenMillion FourHundredAndEightyThreeThousand SixHundredAndFortySeven()" is a very good choice for a function name" - SpacixOne ( offering help to someone who really needed it ) ( spaces added for the benefit of people running at < 1280x1024 )

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                      • L leckey 0

                        I'm not a true Aussie, but if you are in the US and looking for a US gift for the wife, you know how to email me right? ;P

                        I have a blog. Read if you care. http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                        Christian Graus
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #58

                        *grin* well, the problem is, she hates jewellry, and other 'traditional' gifts. I lucked out this time, she told me the watch had broken and I realised I couldn't lose with a nice watch. I may well call on you for advice on future trips tho.

                        Christian Graus Please read this if you don't understand the answer I've given you "also I don't think "TranslateOneToTwoBillion OneHundredAndFortySevenMillion FourHundredAndEightyThreeThousand SixHundredAndFortySeven()" is a very good choice for a function name" - SpacixOne ( offering help to someone who really needed it ) ( spaces added for the benefit of people running at < 1280x1024 )

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                        • L leckey 0

                          Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

                          Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                          Joe Woodbury
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #59

                          leckey wrote:

                          , what is your advice for a lasting marriage?

                          Don't live in the Dakotas. Oh, damn. (Going on 23 years here and don't have the faintest clue how except that we mostly just get along.)

                          Anyone who thinks he has a better idea of what's good for people than people do is a swine. - P.J. O'Rourke

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                          • C Christian Graus

                            I have a failed marriage. Mostly because I was pretty self absorbed, and I never bothered to ask her if she was happy. In my defence, she pushed the marriage through, I wanted to go slow, I knew I wasn't ready. 15 years married this year to wife #2. No earth shattering advice, just the obvious - listen to your partner, even when you think they are being stupid.

                            Christian Graus Please read this if you don't understand the answer I've given you "also I don't think "TranslateOneToTwoBillion OneHundredAndFortySevenMillion FourHundredAndEightyThreeThousand SixHundredAndFortySeven()" is a very good choice for a function name" - SpacixOne ( offering help to someone who really needed it ) ( spaces added for the benefit of people running at < 1280x1024 )

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                            Vikram A Punathambekar
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #60

                            Christian Graus wrote:

                            I have a failed marriage.

                            Christian Graus wrote:

                            15 years married this year to wife #2.

                            I do hope the failed marriage was to wife #1, but the "have a failed marriage" part leaves me unsure. :~ Yeah, you can tell English isn't my native language. :-O

                            Cheers, Vikram.


                            The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray.

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                            • L leckey 0

                              15 years: traditional gift is crystal; modern is watches. Apparently so you can see how much more time until the Other shuts up. :-D

                              Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                              Vikram A Punathambekar
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #61

                              leckey wrote:

                              modern is watches. Apparently so you can see how much more time until the Other shuts up.

                              :-D :laugh:

                              Cheers, Vikram.


                              The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray.

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                              • C Christian Graus

                                ROTFL - well, I think Tim was a way to make sure we broke up, and then I dunno why it lasted for years. The online guy, well, I dunno, I mean, they did meet and date, so I assume he turned out to be normal. I dunno, either way, I'm happy with how things ended up for me, so I hope she's happy, too.

                                Christian Graus Please read this if you don't understand the answer I've given you "also I don't think "TranslateOneToTwoBillion OneHundredAndFortySevenMillion FourHundredAndEightyThreeThousand SixHundredAndFortySeven()" is a very good choice for a function name" - SpacixOne ( offering help to someone who really needed it ) ( spaces added for the benefit of people running at < 1280x1024 )

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                                Andy_L_J
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #62

                                Christian Graus wrote:

                                so I hope she's happy, too

                                Thats big of you Christian - too many blokes I know have written women off after the first attempt. I think that usually says more about them than the ex partner.

                                I don't speak Idiot - please talk slowly and clearly

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                                • L leckey 0

                                  Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

                                  Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

                                  L Offline
                                  L Offline
                                  Lost User
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #63

                                  leckey wrote:

                                  For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage?

                                  Sex, and plenty of it. :)

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                                  • L leckey 0

                                    Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

                                    Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

                                    P Offline
                                    P Offline
                                    Pete OHanlon
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #64

                                    Remember to listen to your partner, that way you have ammo later on. Only kidding.

                                    Deja View - the feeling that you've seen this post before.

                                    My blog | My articles

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                                    • L leckey 0

                                      Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

                                      Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                                      E Offline
                                      Ed Poore
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #65

                                      Well Mum & Dad have been going 25 years and they reckon they're together because they can't be bothered to go through the effort of a divorce.  They've even decided not to move because (well it's a very nice farm and there's never been a mortgage on it [well there was put it was paid off in the first month]) they'd have to sort through a farm-house of junk plus 5 barns worth and they just don't want to have to tidy it up. :-D

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                                      • L leckey 0

                                        Today marks nine years of being married and not killing each other. For those of you who have been married for awhile, what is your advice for a lasting marriage? Funnies and quips welcomed. If you have a failed marriage, any additional advice on what to avoid?

                                        Holidays! (June 13th) http://craptasticnation.blogspot.com/[^]

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                                        K Offline
                                        KaRl
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #66

                                        Congratulations to both of you! No advice from me, my longest love story didn't last more than 8 years.

                                        The most wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed Fold with us! ¤ flickr

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                                        • R RichardM1

                                          The 12th was our 15th anniversary. Things to do: Marry my wife (sorry, she is taken). Things to not do: Marry my ex-wife (the guy who she divorced next agrees). Look for someone who resolves problems the same way you do. If you are into knock-down-drag-outs, make sure your spouse is, too. If you like to discuss what is going on, make sure your spouse does, to. If you like to stick your head in the sand and ignore stuff (at least financially), make sure your spouse does not. Someone has to understand some of the realities of the world. If you are going to have children, understand that you will have different ideas of what is right. Figure it out, and understand, he wants to make the rules, but she will probably be the one implementing the policies on a day to day basis, so her vote REALLY matters. That is not sexism, that is statistics. Finances matter. So do dreams and feelings, and love does not overcome all. Love is not lust. Love is not feelings. Loving someone is a day by day decision to put them, if not ahead of you, at least at the same level as you. You will get over the lust, and the starry eyed feelings. You must keep your commitment, you must honor and respect, even when you don't feel friendly. Men, your wife needs your love, tell her, and mean it, as often as you can. Women, your husband needs your respect, give it to him, even when the world does not. If you don't respect him, he will not respect himself. If your home is not the place where you can hide from the cold, hard, world, together, it will never be more than your house. Be friends, first. On religion, you need to be compatible, so never go into a relationship trying to save the other. In the long run, they will get resentful, and you will be frustrated, and it will be a wedge between you. If one of you gets it afterwards, your religion will speak to you on what you should do, but don't put that burden on yourselves from the beginning. And when you read this, know I am only at fifty percent (if I'm lucky). :-O Dang, that was just supposed to be a two line joke.

                                          Silver member by constant and unflinching longevity.

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                                          J Offline
                                          JDL EPM
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #67

                                          Very, very good advice - especially the bit about knock-down drag-out fights. My first wife (seven years) suggested I wasn't a man because I didn't go in for those. She's on her (at least) fourth husband. My second marrige is coming up for 33 years in September. Remember birthdays and anniversaries! If you're physically capable, do something physical together (no, not JUST that! :-O ). We walk (and talk and LISTEN) and do Scottish Country Dancing. Life will be healthier mentally and physically. Do something apart from each other. She goes to the Women's Institute; I go out "with the boys" on curry evenings - same night of the month. Both lead to lively conversations on the walks because new ideas are brought into the family. Get a pet. :-D

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