Have a [positive] Day!
-
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
chicks that are attracted to 4-wheel drive monster trucks that are so tall you can see the curvature of the earth from the driver's seat.
You must be from Texas.
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
and when we help them into the truck (as any good gentleman would do) ya have to put your hands....censored
-
And when have you ever seen a woman's magazine? Well, I suppose I could see you reading Chicks with Guns, but anything else? Definitely not.
Deja View - the feeling that you've seen this post before.
Did someone say chicks with guns[^]?
"Multithreading is just one damn thing after, before, or simultaneous with another." - Andrei Alexandrescu
-
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
Hey, I learned a long tme ago that unless you're specifically asked, don't comment on someone's "style" or sense of fashion.
That's some good advice. Did you learn it when reading the latest issue of Cosmopolitan? :)
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
No, you learn it from patrolling our southern border: Immigrant: "Hey gringo! Do you like my sombrero?!" You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "NO!". Or by doing a tour in Iraq: Terrorist: "Jihaaaad! American infidel! Do you like my towel?!" You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "NO!". Or by fighting in the American Revolution: British Regular (standing in a line with his friends in an open field): "I say there, colonials! Do you like my snappy red breast coat?!" You (from behind a tree in the woods wearing natural colored clothing): Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "NO!". Or by fighting in the French/American war: French surrender monkey: "Monsuer!" You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "Not only NO, but HELL NO!". Or by fighting in the Italians in WW2: Italian soldier: Making some weird-ass hand gestures towards you You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "What the hell was that". In all of those examples, it's okay to comment since the question was breached by someone else.
"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
-----
"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001modified on Wednesday, September 10, 2008 4:33 PM
-
Josh Smith wrote:
That's some good advice. Did you learn it when reading the latest issue of Cosmopolitan?
Nope - every man knows there's no correct answer to the question, "Does this dress make my ass look big?" But there are many possible wrong answers: "My, but that's a bold color choice for a woman your size." "No bigger than the last dress you showed me." "Yes." "No." "Here, try this one." "I'd say it definitely makes your tits look smaller." BTW, you learn these things from experience, not from reading some stupid magazine...
"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
-----
"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001The correct answer, of course, is "No. It's the huge amount of crap you stuff down your cakehole that makes your ass big. Why blame an innocent dress?"
Deja View - the feeling that you've seen this post before.
-
No, you learn it from patrolling our southern border: Immigrant: "Hey gringo! Do you like my sombrero?!" You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "NO!". Or by doing a tour in Iraq: Terrorist: "Jihaaaad! American infidel! Do you like my towel?!" You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "NO!". Or by fighting in the American Revolution: British Regular (standing in a line with his friends in an open field): "I say there, colonials! Do you like my snappy red breast coat?!" You (from behind a tree in the woods wearing natural colored clothing): Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "NO!". Or by fighting in the French/American war: French surrender monkey: "Monsuer!" You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "Not only NO, but HELL NO!". Or by fighting in the Italians in WW2: Italian soldier: Making some weird-ass hand gestures towards you You: Fires an accurate kill shot, and yells "What the hell was that". In all of those examples, it's okay to comment since the question was breached by someone else.
"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
-----
"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001modified on Wednesday, September 10, 2008 4:33 PM
:laugh:
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
-
Dinobot_Slag wrote:
So did you get her number or what??
No, I'm not single. If I was, I might have asked.
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
Josh Smith wrote:
No, I'm not single.
May be she is. Don’t be so selfish – cash down the laughter.
The narrow specialist in the broad sense of the word is a complete idiot in the narrow sense of the word. Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.
-
and when we help them into the truck (as any good gentleman would do) ya have to put your hands....censored
A true gentleman would install steps (and if necessary) a grab handle to allow ladies to enter without being groped. :)
Today's lesson is brought to you by the word "niggardly". Remember kids, don't attribute to racism what can be explained by Scandinavian language roots. -- Robert Royall
-
A true gentleman would install steps (and if necessary) a grab handle to allow ladies to enter without being groped. :)
Today's lesson is brought to you by the word "niggardly". Remember kids, don't attribute to racism what can be explained by Scandinavian language roots. -- Robert Royall
dan neely wrote:
A true gentleman would install steps (and if necessary) a grab handle to allow ladies to enter without being groped.
Or at least rig up a stout block and tackle system to hoist her up.
"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
-----
"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 -
dan neely wrote:
A true gentleman would install steps (and if necessary) a grab handle to allow ladies to enter without being groped.
Or at least rig up a stout block and tackle system to hoist her up.
"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
-----
"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
a stout block and tackle system to hoist her up
That would be a Bullhead City woman. :sigh:
"A Journey of a Thousand Rest Stops Begins with a Single Movement"
-
After going for my daily post-lunch walk today, I stopped into the local coffeehouse to get my daily post-walk coffee (a creature of habit, I am). The girl working the counter seemed in a slump. I was the last person in her line, so after the transaction completed I said, "Have a great day." She replied, "Yeah, have a good day." I then jokingly said, "Hey that's not fair! I said have a great day, but you only said have a good day. We need to be on equal footing here!" She stared at me in confusion for a few seconds and then burst out laughing. Then she said, "Have a wonderful day!" I replied "Have a spectacular day!" And we kept joking about it, increasing the power of the positive adjective to the point where it was absurd. We both then noticed that another customer had gotten in line behind me during this exchange, and he looked at us like we were totally off our rockers. Which, naturally, made us both laugh even harder! :laugh:
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
Josh Smith wrote:
were totally off our rockers
:laugh: Josh, the WPF master, off his rocker? No waaaay :-D
"The clue train passed his station without stopping." - John Simmons / outlaw programmer "Real programmers just throw a bunch of 1s and 0s at the computer to see what sticks" - Pete O'Hanlon "Not only do you continue to babble nonsense, you can't even correctly remember the nonsense you babbled just minutes ago." - Rob Graham
-
After going for my daily post-lunch walk today, I stopped into the local coffeehouse to get my daily post-walk coffee (a creature of habit, I am). The girl working the counter seemed in a slump. I was the last person in her line, so after the transaction completed I said, "Have a great day." She replied, "Yeah, have a good day." I then jokingly said, "Hey that's not fair! I said have a great day, but you only said have a good day. We need to be on equal footing here!" She stared at me in confusion for a few seconds and then burst out laughing. Then she said, "Have a wonderful day!" I replied "Have a spectacular day!" And we kept joking about it, increasing the power of the positive adjective to the point where it was absurd. We both then noticed that another customer had gotten in line behind me during this exchange, and he looked at us like we were totally off our rockers. Which, naturally, made us both laugh even harder! :laugh:
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
Did you get her number? :laugh:
-
Josh Smith wrote:
were totally off our rockers
:laugh: Josh, the WPF master, off his rocker? No waaaay :-D
"The clue train passed his station without stopping." - John Simmons / outlaw programmer "Real programmers just throw a bunch of 1s and 0s at the computer to see what sticks" - Pete O'Hanlon "Not only do you continue to babble nonsense, you can't even correctly remember the nonsense you babbled just minutes ago." - Rob Graham
Paul Conrad wrote:
Josh, the WPF master, off his rocker? No waaaay
The Devil you say! :)
:josh: My WPF Blog[^] Sleep is overrated.
