JOTD: International Council OF MAN LAWS
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Vikram A Punathambekar wrote:
Men have no idea what Mauve is.
They do - it's the one with the most RAM!
I said men, not PHBs.
Cheers, Vikram. (Proud to have finally cracked a CCC!)
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When you say mushroom are you referring to the colour of the surface or the gills. To chantrelles? to fly agarics? the colours you see when you eat a funky one? Mushroom just can't define a colour in any meaningful way These issues are why real men define colours in hex!
According to an Old Dulux Colour Chart :-)
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What the heck is Taupe?! (no I haven't googled and neither do I have the intention to!)
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It's a colour known only to woman, which when applied to a wall will cause men to say "Oh, you meant brown"
Graham Librarians rule, Ook!
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I move to request an addition to the amendment. "Fuschia (or whatever it is called) is not a color recognized by men. Ever." Aye!
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International Council OF MAN LAWS: 1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. 2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances: (a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master. (b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse. (c) After wrecking your boss's car. (d) When she is using her teeth. 3: Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his friends. 4: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her. 5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable. 6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your mate's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice. 7: In the mini-bus, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest. 8: When stumbling upon other blokes watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who is playing. 9: You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment (commonly known as a Dutch oven), she's officially your girlfriend. 10: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach ... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free. 11: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts. 12: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. 13: Friends don't let friends wear Budgie Smugglers. Ever. Issue closed. 14: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything. 15: Women who claim they 'love to watch sports' must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers. 16: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight. 17: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy. <
1.21 Gigawatts wrote:
24: Thou shall not buy a car in the colours of brown, pink, lime, green, orange or sky blue.
I object to this. My car is British Racing Green and I feel this should be an exception to the green rule. It's got "racing" in the name FFS.
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There's no fuschia in it :-D
Visit http://www.notreadytogiveup.com/[^] and do something special today.
Groan
Graham Librarians rule, Ook!
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It's a colour known only to woman, which when applied to a wall will cause men to say "Oh, you meant brown"
Graham Librarians rule, Ook!
So why don't women simply say "brown"
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So why don't women simply say "brown"
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Mustafa Ismail Mustafa wrote:
So why don't women simply say "brown"
If we knew that we would be women. One of life's great mysteries to us. When my wife asks me "What kind of flower is that?" and I answer "It's a red one" she seems somewhat upset. Don't understand that one either. After all I never get it wrong!
Graham Librarians rule, Ook!
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1.21 Gigawatts wrote:
24: Thou shall not buy a car in the colours of brown, pink, lime, green, orange or sky blue.
I object to this. My car is British Racing Green and I feel this should be an exception to the green rule. It's got "racing" in the name FFS.
or the martini porsche in that sky blue and orange - if steve Mcqueen can drive it then its good enough for me
Go away and research the subject, analyze the options for and against, understand the problem and them come back when you agree with me.
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21: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. So I can only say "Hello" then. :-)
If it's that bad, it's better over quickly.
Personally, I love the idea that Raymond spends his nights posting bad regexs to mailing lists under the pseudonym of Jane Smith. He'd be like a super hero, only more nerdy and less useful. [Trevel]
| FoldWithUs! | sighist -
It's between Beige and Mushroom. [Hangs head in shame....]
Beige is the only color that old PC cases used to be. So that should be acceptable to know as a geek. Yes?
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Rule 29: When buying a car, it has a petrol engine, not diesel, not hybrid, and not sodding electric. Rule 30: A man will own one suit. This shall be used for weddings, funerals, job interviews and court appearances. Rule 31: When exiting a shower, the towel is worn either round the waist or casually tossed over one shoulder. It is at no time worn round the chest. Rule 31a: If a woman is present when exiting the shower, the genitals should be waved at her and the call of "Whay Hay" given.
------------------------------------ "Men may make bad decisions, immoral decisions or just plain wrong decisions, but at least they make decisions. Women on the other hand..." Patrick Kielty 2006
I've got 2 suits, but only one fits my at any particular time. The larger one currently fits me.
Pete
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I've got 2 suits, but only one fits my at any particular time. The larger one currently fits me.
Pete
:laugh: I know what you mean!
If the post was helpful, please vote, eh! Current activities: Book: Devils by Fyodor Dostoyevsky Project: Hospital Automation, final stage Learning: Image analysis, LINQ Now and forever, defiant to the end. What is Multiple Sclerosis[^]?
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International Council OF MAN LAWS: 1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. 2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances: (a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master. (b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse. (c) After wrecking your boss's car. (d) When she is using her teeth. 3: Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his friends. 4: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her. 5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable. 6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your mate's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice. 7: In the mini-bus, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest. 8: When stumbling upon other blokes watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who is playing. 9: You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment (commonly known as a Dutch oven), she's officially your girlfriend. 10: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach ... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free. 11: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts. 12: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. 13: Friends don't let friends wear Budgie Smugglers. Ever. Issue closed. 14: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything. 15: Women who claim they 'love to watch sports' must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers. 16: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight. 17: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy. <
now if only you hadn't ended with (If this is a repost then apologies) ... real men do not apologize
Steve _________________ I C(++) therefore I am