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More elephant (and giraffe) jokes

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  • A Abhinav S

    1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

    There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

    L Offline
    L Offline
    Lost User
    wrote on last edited by
    #4

    How do you get two whales in a Ford Festiva? Head down the M4

    ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

    A 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • A Abhinav S

      1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

      There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #5

      How do you get two whales in a Ford Escort? One in the front and one in the back

      ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

      P 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • A Abhinav S

        Its freezing. How would you light up your tobacco pipe?

        There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

        R Offline
        R Offline
        Rajesh R Subramanian
        wrote on last edited by
        #6

        Open the match box, take out the horse, tie it to my neck, put in the match sticks into the match box, take one out, strike it on the side and light up the pipe. Not an easy thing, you see. :)

        “Follow your bliss.” – Joseph Campbell

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • L Lost User

          How do you get two whales in a Ford Festiva? Head down the M4

          ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

          A Offline
          A Offline
          Abhinav S
          wrote on last edited by
          #7

          You won't be taking any of your Fords out for a drive today.

          There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

          L 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • A Abhinav S

            You won't be taking any of your Fords out for a drive today.

            There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #8

            I will if I can just get the whales out

            ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • A Abhinav S

              1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

              There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

              L Offline
              L Offline
              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #9

              How can you tell if an Elephant has been in your fridge? Footprints in the butter.

              ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

              G 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • L Lost User

                How can you tell if an Elephant has been in your fridge? Footprints in the butter.

                ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                G Offline
                G Offline
                Garth J Lancaster
                wrote on last edited by
                #10

                How can you tell if a Kiwi has been in your fridge ? love bites on the leg of lamb (and your thongs/flip flops/jandals are missing)

                L 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • A Abhinav S

                  1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                  There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  Lost User
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #11

                  How can you tell if there's and Elephant in your bed? There'll be a 'E' embroidered on his pyjamas

                  ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • G Garth J Lancaster

                    How can you tell if a Kiwi has been in your fridge ? love bites on the leg of lamb (and your thongs/flip flops/jandals are missing)

                    L Offline
                    L Offline
                    Lost User
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #12

                    Garth J Lancaster wrote:

                    How can you tell if a Kiwi has been in your frudge ?

                    FTFY

                    ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • A Abhinav S

                      1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                      There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                      L Offline
                      L Offline
                      Lost User
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #13

                      What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence

                      ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                      A 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • A Abhinav S

                        1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                        There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                        L Offline
                        L Offline
                        Lost User
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #14

                        What's small, grey and has a trunk? A mouse going on holiday

                        ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • A Abhinav S

                          1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                          There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #15

                          What's small, brown and has a trunk? A mouse returning from holiday

                          ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                          A 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • A Abhinav S

                            1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                            There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                            L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Lost User
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #16

                            Why do Elephants have trunks? So they can go swimming

                            ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence

                              ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                              A Offline
                              A Offline
                              Abhinav S
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #17

                              You might as well get a new bed too.

                              There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • A Abhinav S

                                1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                                There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                Lost User
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #18

                                Why do elephants have big ears? Because Noddy wouldn't pay the ransom

                                ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                                A 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • L Lost User

                                  What's small, brown and has a trunk? A mouse returning from holiday

                                  ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                                  A Offline
                                  A Offline
                                  Abhinav S
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #19

                                  Yeah. He had gone to Africa to visit the elephant.

                                  There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L Lost User

                                    Why do elephants have big ears? Because Noddy wouldn't pay the ransom

                                    ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                                    A Offline
                                    A Offline
                                    Abhinav S
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #20

                                    :laugh:

                                    There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • A Abhinav S

                                      1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                                      There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                                      _ Offline
                                      _ Offline
                                      _Damian S_
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #21

                                      How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry her!

                                      I don't have ADHD, I have ADOS... Attention Deficit oooh SHINY!! Booger Mobile (n) - A bright green 1964 Ford Falcon - our entry into the Camp Quality esCarpade!! Do something wonderful - make a donation to Camp Quality today!!

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • A Abhinav S

                                        1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

                                        There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                                        L Offline
                                        L Offline
                                        Lost User
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #22

                                        Why are elephants grey and wrinkly? Because if they were white and smooth they'd be an aspirin.

                                        ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                                        A 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • L Lost User

                                          Why are elephants grey and wrinkly? Because if they were white and smooth they'd be an aspirin.

                                          ___________________________________________ .\\axxx (That's an 'M')

                                          A Offline
                                          A Offline
                                          Abhinav S
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #23

                                          It might just be a little difficult to swallow an aspirin then.

                                          There's nothing left in my right brain and nothing right in my left brain.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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