Is it better to fear or respect your parents?
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I have never, and hope I never will hit The Boy (tm) My parents never really hit me (I remember one occasion when I followed my dad across a busy road without looking - luckily my Mum grabbed my collar, yanked me back to the pavement, and thwacked my legs. When I had finished crying, she calmly explained to me that she'd hit me because she was scared - I was nearly hit by a car. That lesson has stayed with me (as you can see, for nearly 50 years!) I feel that if my parents had hit me frequently, the lesson would have been less well learned. Our neighbor frequently spanks her kids. not brutal, just a 'flying spank' usually. But it is surely obvious it does no good - because she persists in doing it! Any form of deterrent needs to work, and for kids needs to be consistent. To The Boy (tm) having me or mum disappointed in him for bad behaviour (or a forgotten chore, whatever) is bad enough. He gets worried when he knows he's done something that he'll be shouted at (in his mind, being talked to sternly is being shouted at). Now he's not the best 'behaved' little boy (he told me the other day he is the third naughtiest in his class - although the teacher disagreed, and joked he could be 2nd :)He talks incessantly which gets him into trouble at school, but the punishment at school is a 3 strikes and you go sit in the kitchen on a stool for 1 minute for every year of your age. and it works. I honestly cannot see that it can do anyone any good hitting a child as a punishment or deterrent. And if you hit your kid for, say, breaking something, then how can you tell that same kid later that it's not OK to hit someone else who breaks something of theirs? I was given the occasional thwack at school - but I was far more deeply affected when I felt i lost the respect of one of the 'good' teachers for playing up (Maxxx, he said, I'm disappointed in you. Then turned and left me standing there, with no punishment. I felt like shit, and went to the staff room later to apologize.) The teachers that thwacked were pretty much a challenge to see if you could get away with it. with the odd exception (cutting off a rapist's dangly bits, for example) I don't really think inflicting pain on anyone for anything elicits an acceptable solution
MVVM# - See how I did MVVM my way ___________________________________________ Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011 .\\axxx (That's a
_Maxxx_ wrote:
And if you hit your kid for, say, breaking something, then how can you tell that same kid later that it's not OK to hit someone else who breaks something of theirs?
I think that is what alot of the "My parents beat me, I am OK" people miss the point. They often they had social quirks that took years too get past. They don't even know it (rarely do people know they are quirky). I don't see punishment as just being punishment. It is how you are teaching your child to handle when others misbehave or do things they don't like as well. You spank/hit your kid, they will likely do the same to their younger sibling or smaller friends. You teach them verbal and mental punishments (like you said you felt so bad with the teach that said "I am disappointed" in you), they will cary that in their life and use those skills.
Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.
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Slacker007 wrote:
and you are an angry f***. you are always angry,
Why yes, yes I am.
Slacker007 wrote:
you drink too much,
I'm Australian, I barey drink enough.
Slacker007 wrote:
and you bitch and complain about everything.
You need to go back and check my posts, I only complain about Yankee land, their inability to spell or form a cognitive phrase. I could care less.
Slacker007 wrote:
By the way, political correctness has absolutely nothing to do with my reasons or motivations for how I do things.
You must be very, very lonely over there, you'd be the only Yank that isn't driven by political correctness.
Slacker007 wrote:
As always, good talking to you. :)
Why yes, yes it is.
Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
Michael Martin wrote:
You must be very, very lonely over there, you'd be the only Yank that isn't driven by political correctness.
no. i am not lonely. many people here in Yankeeland share the same views as me. I love being a Yankee, if not for any other reason, then to piss off people like you.
Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
"No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011) -
I grew up fearing my father rather than respecting him. Which lends to the question, is spanking an acceptable form of discipline? My father knew no other way of discipline then hitting me. Some may argue with me here on "technical" grounds but IMVHO, I consider spanking to be hitting (pain is always involved and is the key motivating factor). I don't spank my children...at all. I have found other, more effective means of discipline, without inflicting physical pain and psychological damage. I would rather have my children respect me, than fear me. My belief again, is that you don't need to inflict physical pain on a child to ensure that they grow up to be well rounded and productive individuals in society. Kind of a deep, heavy topic for a Thursday morning (U.S. time) I know but one that has been on my mind as of late. -- cheers.
Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
"No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)There is nothing that spanking accomplishes that can't be handled more effectively with other means.
Curvature of the Mind now with 3D
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There is nothing that spanking accomplishes that can't be handled more effectively with other means.
Curvature of the Mind now with 3D
Andy Brummer wrote:
There is nothing that spanking accomplishes that can't be handled more effectively with other means.
Well now that actually depends on your pleasures. :-O Oh wait, you are talking about spanking kids ;P
Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.
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Andy Brummer wrote:
There is nothing that spanking accomplishes that can't be handled more effectively with other means.
Well now that actually depends on your pleasures. :-O Oh wait, you are talking about spanking kids ;P
Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.
:laugh: +5
Curvature of the Mind now with 3D
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I grew up fearing my father rather than respecting him. Which lends to the question, is spanking an acceptable form of discipline? My father knew no other way of discipline then hitting me. Some may argue with me here on "technical" grounds but IMVHO, I consider spanking to be hitting (pain is always involved and is the key motivating factor). I don't spank my children...at all. I have found other, more effective means of discipline, without inflicting physical pain and psychological damage. I would rather have my children respect me, than fear me. My belief again, is that you don't need to inflict physical pain on a child to ensure that they grow up to be well rounded and productive individuals in society. Kind of a deep, heavy topic for a Thursday morning (U.S. time) I know but one that has been on my mind as of late. -- cheers.
Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
"No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)There are two kinds of pain physical and emotional. Both leave there scares. Some people whether young or old don't learn except through pain and suffering. Reasoning doesn't work on all children or adults.
Well, who doesn't release stuff like that ? Microsoft software is just as bad. Christian Graus That's called seagull management (or sometimes pigeon management)... Fly in, flap your arms and squawk a lot, crap all over everything and fly out again... by _Damian S_
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I have never hit any of my kids. Not because they didn't deserve it (they could be right little buggers) but because I would not wish to inflict pain upon them for what is (usually) a trivial incident best dealt with by removing gadget rights or getting mum to deal with it! :-) My father hit me (a slap on the backside) but I suspect that spanking, etc, is a generational response to punishing kids. I once asked him why he had hit me and he just said that's how he was brought up. He hated himself when he did, but didn't know any other way. Feel more sorry for him than my spanked backside - his father was a nasty bully as I vaguely recall. (It wasn't very often anyway - I was a naughty child :-))
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me
mark merrens wrote:
getting mum to deal with it!
What a cop-out... If there's one thing I really don't like is the whole "just wait till your father/mother hears about this". You saw the incident, you deal with it. That's what I believe.
Silence is golden... but duct tape is silver!! Booger Mobile - My bright green 1964 Ford Falcon - check out the blog here!! | If you feel generous - make a donation to Camp Quality!!
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Michael Martin wrote:
You must be very, very lonely over there, you'd be the only Yank that isn't driven by political correctness.
no. i am not lonely. many people here in Yankeeland share the same views as me. I love being a Yankee, if not for any other reason, then to piss off people like you.
Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
"No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)Slacker007 wrote:
piss off people like you
I've said it before, and I'll say it again... It's better to be pissed off than pissed ON!!
Silence is golden... but duct tape is silver!! Booger Mobile - My bright green 1964 Ford Falcon - check out the blog here!! | If you feel generous - make a donation to Camp Quality!!
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Michael Martin wrote:
You must be very, very lonely over there, you'd be the only Yank that isn't driven by political correctness.
no. i am not lonely. many people here in Yankeeland share the same views as me. I love being a Yankee, if not for any other reason, then to piss off people like you.
Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
"No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)Slacker007 wrote:
no. i am not lonely. many people here in Yankeeland share the same views as me.
Y'all must be hiding in a cave somewhere or all the Politicallt Correct twats get all the international media exposure and trips here to Australia.
Slacker007 wrote:
I love being a Yankee, if not for any other reason, then to piss off people like you.
But wouldn't you one day like to to be able to use complete sentences?
Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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Slacker007 wrote:
no. i am not lonely. many people here in Yankeeland share the same views as me.
Y'all must be hiding in a cave somewhere or all the Politicallt Correct twats get all the international media exposure and trips here to Australia.
Slacker007 wrote:
I love being a Yankee, if not for any other reason, then to piss off people like you.
But wouldn't you one day like to to be able to use complete sentences?
Michael Martin Australia "I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible." - Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
Michael Martin wrote:
But wouldn't you one day like to to be able to use complete sentences?
not a chance in hell. I love being an ignoramus and I love being an American; I take great pride in that.
Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
"No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)