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Most ridiculous client request

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  • L Lost User

    There was a question posted in QA some while ago by someone building a shopping cart system for their business. He wanted to know what he needed to do to allow customers to pay for their (internet) purchases by cash.

    speaking as ...

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    lewax00
    wrote on last edited by
    #18

    Just yesterday someone in QA wanted "java code to show core functionality of spiderman".

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    • L lewax00

      Just yesterday someone in QA wanted "java code to show core functionality of spiderman".

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      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #19

      Yes, I saw that, gave me a :laugh: .

      speaking as ...

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      • J Jacquers

        What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client? Today in a meeting while demoing the software (a WPF application) the customer complained about the fact that the checkbox ticks fade in and out when you click on them. Apparently it isn't instant enough. It's the closest I've come to just getting up and walking out of a meeting. :doh: btw, found out that the checkbox behavior is to do with the windows theme (windows 7) and just the standard way it works, but I will be able to re-template it and make it like the client wants.

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        RugbyLeague
        wrote on last edited by
        #20

        I was showing a client my database analysis software and explaining the query logic using "And", "Or" and "Not" She pondered the possibilities for a while before asking "Can we have 'But' too"

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        • P peterchen

          This is a good sign People, when asked for a review, will tend to critizise the worst aspect they see first. If it's Tüddelkram, it means the rest of the application is OK. If, OTOH, they say "it's fine", they haven't understood either the question or the problem.

          FILETIME to time_t
          | FoldWithUs! | sighist | WhoIncludes - Analyzing C++ include file hierarchy

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          Forogar
          wrote on last edited by
          #21

          I assume that by "Tüddelkram" you means small stuff, nothing important?

          - Life in the fast lane is only fun if you live in a country with no speed limits. - Of all the things I have lost, it is my mind that I miss the most. - I vaguely remember having a good memory...

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          • E Ennis Ray Lynch Jr

            A web based (html) point of sale client that could handle credit card transactions on the fly with no access to the internet and no install.

            Need custom software developed? I do custom programming based primarily on MS tools with an emphasis on C# development and consulting. I also do Android Programming as I find it a refreshing break from the MS. "And they, since they Were not the one dead, turned to their affairs" -- Robert Frost

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            RJOberg
            wrote on last edited by
            #22

            Hey! I have that request right now! We have tablets in the field and we need them to query back and get information from the servers. Plus they need to have access to Google and Bing maps just incase MapPoint has the wrong location for an address (this happens more than I would like to admit). The tablet has no data connection, they aren't part of the domain so can't VPN in even if you had a wifi connection. Did you ever figure out how to get your PoS client working? If so, send code plz! Urgent! Best I have had so far is to send people with USB sticks and carrier pigeons. I can't figure out how to get the data back though since the person is on the move.

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            • J Jacquers

              What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client? Today in a meeting while demoing the software (a WPF application) the customer complained about the fact that the checkbox ticks fade in and out when you click on them. Apparently it isn't instant enough. It's the closest I've come to just getting up and walking out of a meeting. :doh: btw, found out that the checkbox behavior is to do with the windows theme (windows 7) and just the standard way it works, but I will be able to re-template it and make it like the client wants.

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              David Crow
              wrote on last edited by
              #23

              Sounds as though they found nothing legitimate to "complain" about so rather than go home empty handed, they dug deep and offered the unrelated comment about the checkbox. You could look at this as a compliment.

              "One man's wage rise is another man's price increase." - Harold Wilson

              "Fireproof doesn't mean the fire will never come. It means when the fire comes that you will be able to withstand it." - Michael Simmons

              "Show me a community that obeys the Ten Commandments and I'll show you a less crowded prison system." - Anonymous

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              • J Jacquers

                What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client? Today in a meeting while demoing the software (a WPF application) the customer complained about the fact that the checkbox ticks fade in and out when you click on them. Apparently it isn't instant enough. It's the closest I've come to just getting up and walking out of a meeting. :doh: btw, found out that the checkbox behavior is to do with the windows theme (windows 7) and just the standard way it works, but I will be able to re-template it and make it like the client wants.

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                Chris C B
                wrote on last edited by
                #24

                Jacquers wrote:

                What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client?

                Some years ago I wrote a subscription management system for an small international publisher, who did no business 'in country', so VAT was not applicable, although I offered to include it, for a fee, in my original proposal. Then whoops! Cyprus joined the EU, and suddenly VAT for EU based customers was applicable. At the end of an intense three hour meeting, where they laid out exactly what they wanted in terms of VAT charging, reporting, transferring to the accounting program etcetera, the lead guy on the client side said: "This is only a small change, and I would like you to do it without charge." After that, not only did I charge like a wounded rhinoceros, but I billed him for the three hour briefing as well. :laugh:

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                • F Forogar

                  I assume that by "Tüddelkram" you means small stuff, nothing important?

                  - Life in the fast lane is only fun if you live in a country with no speed limits. - Of all the things I have lost, it is my mind that I miss the most. - I vaguely remember having a good memory...

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                  peterchen
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #25

                  Exactly ;) There's probably a perfect English word for that, but as I considered it recognizable from the context, I thought why not German?

                  FILETIME to time_t
                  | FoldWithUs! | sighist | WhoIncludes - Analyzing C++ include file hierarchy

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                  • J Jacquers

                    What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client? Today in a meeting while demoing the software (a WPF application) the customer complained about the fact that the checkbox ticks fade in and out when you click on them. Apparently it isn't instant enough. It's the closest I've come to just getting up and walking out of a meeting. :doh: btw, found out that the checkbox behavior is to do with the windows theme (windows 7) and just the standard way it works, but I will be able to re-template it and make it like the client wants.

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                    Tim Groven
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #26

                    On a small application we were working on, we got a ticket put in by one of the users. In the time picker field, it doesn't change from AM to PM or back when going from 12 to 1. :laugh: :laugh:

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                    • M Mark_Wallace

                      Well, if you haven't fixed 4387 by tomorrow morning, you and I will have a problem.

                      I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

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                      Vark111
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #27

                      He'll roll that change out at midnight local time.

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                      • L Lost User

                        Mate of mine created a new system years ago, brilliant thing it was, quite revolutionary for the company, demoed it to the management. When they finished there was a silence for a while before one of them said "A bit blue isn't it?". That was the sum total of the feedback.

                        Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

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                        R Giskard Reventlov
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #28

                        Elephanting unbelievable that they allow people that thick anywhere near an office! We should be in charge, not the users!!! :-)

                        "If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair. nils illegitimus carborundum me, me, me

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                        • J Jacquers

                          What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client? Today in a meeting while demoing the software (a WPF application) the customer complained about the fact that the checkbox ticks fade in and out when you click on them. Apparently it isn't instant enough. It's the closest I've come to just getting up and walking out of a meeting. :doh: btw, found out that the checkbox behavior is to do with the windows theme (windows 7) and just the standard way it works, but I will be able to re-template it and make it like the client wants.

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                          W Balboos GHB
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #29

                          You (and other staff) should have looked at him/her with a puzzled face and asked them what in the world it is they're talking about - pretend no one else can see it.

                          "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein

                          "As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert

                          "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010

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                          • J Jacquers

                            What is the most ridiculous request you have received from a client? Today in a meeting while demoing the software (a WPF application) the customer complained about the fact that the checkbox ticks fade in and out when you click on them. Apparently it isn't instant enough. It's the closest I've come to just getting up and walking out of a meeting. :doh: btw, found out that the checkbox behavior is to do with the windows theme (windows 7) and just the standard way it works, but I will be able to re-template it and make it like the client wants.

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                            Steve Maier
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #30

                            We had a system that had a touch screen as the primary monitor and a secondary one as well. Someone wrote up the bug that they cannot do a drag-n-drop from one screen, lift her finger up and put it on the other monitor. We put in the comment something about "cannot change the laws of physics" and left it open for years to let management see the quality of the bugs we are getting in.

                            Steve Maier

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                            • L Lost User

                              Mate of mine created a new system years ago, brilliant thing it was, quite revolutionary for the company, demoed it to the management. When they finished there was a silence for a while before one of them said "A bit blue isn't it?". That was the sum total of the feedback.

                              Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

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                              Nathan Swann
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #31

                              My Aunt-in-law was recently part of a team working on a new website design for her school. During the testing phase, they showed what they had to the management, it was generally well received, but the main critique they got back was: "The site is great, but it seems very Tuesday... we were looking for something more Thursday." She very quickly removed herself from the project as did most of the team involved.

                              Nat 'Squeak' Davies Squeak Technologies

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                              • R RJOberg

                                Hey! I have that request right now! We have tablets in the field and we need them to query back and get information from the servers. Plus they need to have access to Google and Bing maps just incase MapPoint has the wrong location for an address (this happens more than I would like to admit). The tablet has no data connection, they aren't part of the domain so can't VPN in even if you had a wifi connection. Did you ever figure out how to get your PoS client working? If so, send code plz! Urgent! Best I have had so far is to send people with USB sticks and carrier pigeons. I can't figure out how to get the data back though since the person is on the move.

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                                L Offline
                                loctrice
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #32

                                RJOberg wrote:

                                send people with USB sticks and carrier pigeons

                                :thumbsup: :laugh:

                                If it moves, compile it

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                                • N Nathan Swann

                                  My Aunt-in-law was recently part of a team working on a new website design for her school. During the testing phase, they showed what they had to the management, it was generally well received, but the main critique they got back was: "The site is great, but it seems very Tuesday... we were looking for something more Thursday." She very quickly removed herself from the project as did most of the team involved.

                                  Nat 'Squeak' Davies Squeak Technologies

                                  M Offline
                                  M Offline
                                  Mycroft Holmes
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #33

                                  Nat Davies wrote:

                                  The site is great, but it seems very Tuesday... we were looking for something more Thursday

                                  Actually the day of the week may be critical to a Teacher, even more so that the rest of us peons. And Thursday may have huge implications for teachers in a specific school! Having said that it is still an obscure comment.

                                  Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

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                                  • L lewax00

                                    Just yesterday someone in QA wanted "java code to show core functionality of spiderman".

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                                    S Offline
                                    SortaCore
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #34

                                    I suppose if you made that, you should put it on the web. :rolleyes:

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                                    • V Vark111

                                      He'll roll that change out at midnight local time.

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                                      M Offline
                                      mc f
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #35

                                      But it will happen again, and you'll have a major problem

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                                      • M mc f

                                        But it will happen again, and you'll have a major problem

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                                        M Offline
                                        Mark_Wallace
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #36

                                        How is it a problem? Programming is an iterative process.

                                        I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

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                                        • L Lost User

                                          We have a system that raises work orders in another system. The process isn't, and cannot be instant. Requests get queued at the target system, and updates come back out on another queue. This can take up to 3 minutes (rubbish I know, but we do not have any control over the second system). The Work Order number is generated in the second system. When they click to request the job they want to print off a summary sheet. This they can do. It does not have the WO number on it as it does not exist yet. This is not good enough, and when I closed the request saying I could not make the system print off future data it was reopened with the comment that this was unacceptable.

                                          Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends. Shed Petition[^]

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                                          L Offline
                                          Lost User
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #37

                                          You do not use the USB crystal ball as data source?

                                          At least artificial intelligence already is superior to natural stupidity

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