Reading between the lines...questions from non-IT people
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kmoorevs wrote:
2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database
I hear database used for a table. Field for column (I will even use field back as not to confuse the user)
kmoorevs wrote:
zip drive!
So did you JUMP (drive) her? [edit]here hear :-O :sigh: [/edit]
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may I suggest you learn basic grammar and the difference between 'hear' and 'here' before we 'here' any more of your pointless comments
;P Thank you, kind person.
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
User: It doesn't work! Me: What doesn't work? User: The button! Me: Which button what happens when you click it? User: The button on the page! Nothing happens I just get an error! Me: What does the error say? tell you to do? Then total radio silence on the subject.
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
My wife orders stuff "offline" from Amazon. It isn't worth the effort to correct her. My one request to Microsoft, Google, and any other software maker that my wife uses, Please for the love of all that is Holy, change the save dialog box to FORCE a user to pick a directory/folder BEFORE they can enter a file name or click the save button. My life would be so much better. I wouldn't have to hear, "I saved it but I don't know where!" in panicked tones EVERY time she saves something. Also, it would be nice if they wouldn't supply default file names. She is a lovely wife and mother other than her learning disability when it comes to a computer. She still doesn't understand Alt-Tabbing between applications.
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Matt U. wrote:
"I need faster internet or something, my computer keeps freezing on me."
I'm sure that was funny in context... but in reality, everything is starting to run from the internet, and it really is the slowest communication point between all the connections in a computer. This nonsense will become more logical as time marches on.
I agree, I hadn't thought about the lack of relevance nowadays. But it still irks me a bit I hear it. Especially when someone has an older computer and a slower DSL connection, and 90% of the tasks they perform involve no sort of internet connectivity.
djj55: Nice but may have a permission problem Pete O'Hanlon: He has my permission to run it.
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I have actually had to do this, when troubleshooting problems with an Android-based treadmill. Androids may have screenshot capability (in the more usual sense), but it is certainly not accessible while locked in to a hardware-dedicated application, nor would there have been an easy way to get a 'real' screenshot to the support tech.
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
One that always drives me crazy is how people don't know the difference between a slash and a back slash.
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kmoorevs wrote:
2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database
I hear database used for a table. Field for column (I will even use field back as not to confuse the user)
kmoorevs wrote:
zip drive!
So did you JUMP (drive) her? [edit]here hear :-O :sigh: [/edit]
I here old server used for a table. Cheap, it was.
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Some one I know calls the whole computer (tower and all) the CPU - it drives me nuts (possibly why he still does it!) :laugh:
At least that's closer. I'm convinced there's a subset of civilians who absolutely adore doing this kind of thing to us. Like the XKCD comic about sending typography geeks cards in papyrus.
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mikepwilson wrote:
Technology hates him. I've never seen anyone have so many problems from normal judicious use of a computer or smartphone. It's impressive.
So You haven't met MY Brothers. One asked me to fix his email. What happened is he forgot his password. :wtf:
David
He called me on my way in to work this morning. One of those "fake anti-virus" trojans. "But I didn't DO anything." "The fact that it's there proves that's not true." He wasn't pleased. But dammit! Stop clicking on s***!
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
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I here old server used for a table. Cheap, it was.
You master are.
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You master are.
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People misuse "bandwidth" all the time. They confuse real bandwidth with the data transfer rate. In engineering, bandwidth refers to the range of frequencies contained in a given band.
The difficult we do right away... ...the impossible takes slightly longer.
Drawing a distinction between those terms may be technically correct (i.e. analog's bandwidth vs digital's data transfer rate), but I see the terms being used interchangeably much more often than not. Actually, I just now scanned a few "Intel white papers" the older ones tend to use the terms interchangeably, at least one new paper avoids either term and uses "frequency" to imply either depending on whether they're discussing the analog or digital side of the chip. I'll pay more attention in the future. Maybe it comes down to where the authors were educated?
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
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I constantly hear non-IT types misusing terms. My brother in-law just texted to ask 'Does flash drives come from adobe? I cant view ESPN video...etc'. :omg: I showed it to the wife who commented 'what a moron, he means a zip drive!'. :wtf: :~ I tried my best not to laugh, or correct her. :rolleyes: but I couldn't help myself. Other commonly misused terms and what they actually mean to say: 0: upload - download, copy, import, export 1: file - folder (or the other way around) 2: database - any kind of file, but usually not a database 3: memory - hard drive space (or again, the other way around) What are some of the funnier misuses of IT related terms you have heard?
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
I used to work at a software publishing firm (Micro Lab) where we sold a flat file database program called "Data Factory". The owner was hoping the the Amper routines (if you are an Olde Tyme Apple II programmer you'll know what that is) I was writing to access the DOS that bypassed the slow command interpreter would speed up the database program to "DMA the data" between the floppy disk and memory. One notable bit of miss-communication was that underneath the built-in Basic language (depending on the generation, either Integer or Floating Point) was the Assembly Monitor program. When you (for another misuse of a term) GPF'd, the Monitor would give you a hex display of the CPU registers. All the programmers referred to it as "Crashing into the Monitor." It took us a while to realize we were confusing all the non-technical people when we said that. They thought somehow the code was crashing into the glass on the CRT screens.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
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Drawing a distinction between those terms may be technically correct (i.e. analog's bandwidth vs digital's data transfer rate), but I see the terms being used interchangeably much more often than not. Actually, I just now scanned a few "Intel white papers" the older ones tend to use the terms interchangeably, at least one new paper avoids either term and uses "frequency" to imply either depending on whether they're discussing the analog or digital side of the chip. I'll pay more attention in the future. Maybe it comes down to where the authors were educated?
ssa-ed wrote:
Maybe it comes down to where whether the authors were educated?
FTFY
The difficult we do right away... ...the impossible takes slightly longer.
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User: It doesn't work! Me: What doesn't work? User: The button! Me: Which button what happens when you click it? User: The button on the page! Nothing happens I just get an error! Me: What does the error say? tell you to do? Then total radio silence on the subject.
Sad, but true, I used to work at a company that employed a full time QA department to test our code. The most common explanation that accompanied bug reports were "I was doing something when it crashed."
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
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A fiend refers to the computer (everything apart from mouse, keyboard & screen) as the "hard drive".
Member 10685535 wrote:
A fiend refers to the computer
Was he a fiendish fiend? Or just a run of the mill fiend? Sorry, I couldn't help myself. :sigh:
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
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He's not a programmer, he's one of those people that tells the programmers what to do, and how to do it. He's also good with buzzwords, and even if he doesn't always understand them it sounds good to the boss. :sigh:
Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello[^]
Jörgen Andersson wrote:
He's also good with buzzwords,
One place I worked hired a VP of Technology who was nothing but a big bag of buzzwords. In the mid 90's he was strolling through our prairie dog village and telling us that Flash memory was going to replace the RAM in our desktops. This was the age of "paradigm" in every memo. He was a real "Management by Magazine Article" type guy. He proclaimed the company's mainframes dead and replaced them with minicomputers. One machine (long in the tooth) used Autocoder and all the programs were to be converted to COBOL. Once all the programs were converted to COBOL, it would be easy to maintain them, he claimed. My observation that a badly written program is hard to maintain in any language was ignored. The future was beckoning. A throwaway line in the Manager's Edition (the summation in the margins) of a Smalltalk book claimed it could be used to model a company. He then wanted us to write a Smalltalk program as a whole company simulator so upper management could explore layoffs and reorganization on the operation of the company. Thankfully he was shown the door, but only after he miss-estimated how long the mainframe to minicomputer conversion was going to take and it cost the company an extra $10 million dollars in operational expenses.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11 Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it. Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
