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  3. Instructions for using the Drive-In Teller at the bank

Instructions for using the Drive-In Teller at the bank

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  • G Gary Wheeler

    Given the quality of the Lounge humor in recent months, that comes as a surprise.

    Software Zen: delete this;

    Z Offline
    Z Offline
    ZurdoDev
    wrote on last edited by
    #9

    There was a point not long ago where everything was racist. Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected, I can't recall but if you said anything bad about anyone people would say your racist. It's just a joke. I'm surprised people didn't see that.

    There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

    R J M 3 Replies Last reply
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    • R Ravi Bhavnani

      What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

      My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

      Z Offline
      Z Offline
      ZurdoDev
      wrote on last edited by
      #10

      It's a joke.

      There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

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      • V Vivi Chellappa

        A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: 'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, "MALE & FEMALE" procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.' ******************************* MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. ******************************* FEMALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up. 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of check book. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided! 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Re-dial person on cell phone. 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake.

        C Offline
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        CarelAgain
        wrote on last edited by
        #11

        roflmao!

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • V Vivi Chellappa

          A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: 'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, "MALE & FEMALE" procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.' ******************************* MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. ******************************* FEMALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up. 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of check book. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided! 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Re-dial person on cell phone. 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake.

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          Nish Nishant
          wrote on last edited by
          #12

          Vivic wrote:

          24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

          On an automatic? That takes some ability! :-D

          Regards, Nish


          Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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          • G Gary Wheeler

            The word you were looking for is misogynistic[^].

            Software Zen: delete this;

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            Nish Nishant
            wrote on last edited by
            #13

            I think he was going for a joke there :-) [intentionally using 'racist' in non-race contexts, including gender-ones, is a common troll tactic in forums]

            Regards, Nish


            Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • Z ZurdoDev

              It's a joke.

              There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

              N Offline
              N Offline
              Nish Nishant
              wrote on last edited by
              #14

              Sucks to be him though, Ravi and Gary missed his joke! :-D

              Regards, Nish


              Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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              • R Ravi Bhavnani

                What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

                My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                N Offline
                N Offline
                Nish Nishant
                wrote on last edited by
                #15

                He's joking. Intentional abuse of the word 'racist'. :-)

                Regards, Nish


                Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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                • N Nish Nishant

                  Sucks to be him though, Ravi and Gary missed his joke! :-D

                  Regards, Nish


                  Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                  Z Offline
                  Z Offline
                  ZurdoDev
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #16

                  Quote:

                  Ravi and Gary missed his joke!

                  Ya, that really does suck. :)

                  There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • Z ZurdoDev

                    There was a point not long ago where everything was racist. Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected, I can't recall but if you said anything bad about anyone people would say your racist. It's just a joke. I'm surprised people didn't see that.

                    There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

                    R Offline
                    R Offline
                    Ravi Bhavnani
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #17

                    RyanDev wrote:

                    There was a point not long ago where everything was racist.

                    Ah, I must have missed that.  Thanks for clearing it up. /ravi

                    My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                    • N Nish Nishant

                      He's joking. Intentional abuse of the word 'racist'. :-)

                      Regards, Nish


                      Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Ravi Bhavnani
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #18

                      OK, I get it now.  I must have missed the spate of "That's racist." comments, hence my confusion. /ravi

                      My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                      • R Ravi Bhavnani

                        OK, I get it now.  I must have missed the spate of "That's racist." comments, hence my confusion. /ravi

                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                        N Offline
                        Nish Nishant
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #19

                        Well, I didn't see many recently either. But it's a general trend online, specially on sites like reddit. Pretty much any disagreement is met with a "that's racist" response. :-)

                        Regards, Nish


                        Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                        R 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • R Ravi Bhavnani

                          RyanDev wrote:

                          There was a point not long ago where everything was racist.

                          Ah, I must have missed that.  Thanks for clearing it up. /ravi

                          My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                          N Offline
                          N Offline
                          Nish Nishant
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #20

                          Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

                          Thanks for clearing it up.

                          Don't thank him. You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there. :-D

                          Regards, Nish


                          Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                          R 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • N Nish Nishant

                            Well, I didn't see many recently either. But it's a general trend online, specially on sites like reddit. Pretty much any disagreement is met with a "that's racist" response. :-)

                            Regards, Nish


                            Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                            R Offline
                            R Offline
                            Ravi Bhavnani
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #21

                            Ah.  Never been to Reddit. /ravi

                            My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                            • R Ravi Bhavnani

                              Nish Sivakumar wrote:

                              You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there.

                              That's racist. /ravi

                              My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                              N Offline
                              N Offline
                              Nish Nishant
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #22

                              :laugh:

                              Regards, Nish


                              Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • N Nish Nishant

                                Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

                                Thanks for clearing it up.

                                Don't thank him. You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there. :-D

                                Regards, Nish


                                Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                                R Offline
                                R Offline
                                Ravi Bhavnani
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #23

                                Nish Sivakumar wrote:

                                You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there.

                                That's racist. /ravi

                                My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                                N 1 Reply Last reply
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                                • R Ravi Bhavnani

                                  What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

                                  My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                                  D Offline
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                                  Dan Neely
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #24

                                  The human race. :doh:

                                  Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason? Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful? --Zachris Topelius Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies. -- Sarah Hoyt

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                                  • R Ravi Bhavnani

                                    What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

                                    My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                                    Mike HankeyM Offline
                                    Mike HankeyM Offline
                                    Mike Hankey
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #25

                                    The human race? :)

                                    Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever! Rich Tennant 5th Wave

                                    R 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                      The human race? :)

                                      Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever! Rich Tennant 5th Wave

                                      R Offline
                                      R Offline
                                      Ravi Bhavnani
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #26

                                      Have you been talking to Dan? :-D /ravi

                                      My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                                      • B Blue Waffler

                                        This is Racist.

                                        M Offline
                                        M Offline
                                        Marc Clifton
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #27

                                        Blue Waffler wrote:

                                        This is Racist.

                                        No, it's sexist. Marc

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                                        • B Blue Waffler

                                          This is Racist.

                                          J Offline
                                          J Offline
                                          JimmyRopes
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #28

                                          Blue Waffler wrote:

                                          This is Racist.

                                          Not if the man and woman are of the same racial origins. :doh:

                                          The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
                                          Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                                          I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

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