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  3. Instructions for using the Drive-In Teller at the bank

Instructions for using the Drive-In Teller at the bank

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  • V Vivi Chellappa

    A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: 'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, "MALE & FEMALE" procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.' ******************************* MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. ******************************* FEMALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up. 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of check book. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided! 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Re-dial person on cell phone. 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake.

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    Nish Nishant
    wrote on last edited by
    #12

    Vivic wrote:

    24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

    On an automatic? That takes some ability! :-D

    Regards, Nish


    Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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    • G Gary Wheeler

      The word you were looking for is misogynistic[^].

      Software Zen: delete this;

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      Nish Nishant
      wrote on last edited by
      #13

      I think he was going for a joke there :-) [intentionally using 'racist' in non-race contexts, including gender-ones, is a common troll tactic in forums]

      Regards, Nish


      Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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      • Z ZurdoDev

        It's a joke.

        There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

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        Nish Nishant
        wrote on last edited by
        #14

        Sucks to be him though, Ravi and Gary missed his joke! :-D

        Regards, Nish


        Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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        • R Ravi Bhavnani

          What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

          My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

          N Offline
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          Nish Nishant
          wrote on last edited by
          #15

          He's joking. Intentional abuse of the word 'racist'. :-)

          Regards, Nish


          Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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          • N Nish Nishant

            Sucks to be him though, Ravi and Gary missed his joke! :-D

            Regards, Nish


            Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

            Z Offline
            Z Offline
            ZurdoDev
            wrote on last edited by
            #16

            Quote:

            Ravi and Gary missed his joke!

            Ya, that really does suck. :)

            There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

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            • Z ZurdoDev

              There was a point not long ago where everything was racist. Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected, I can't recall but if you said anything bad about anyone people would say your racist. It's just a joke. I'm surprised people didn't see that.

              There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

              R Offline
              R Offline
              Ravi Bhavnani
              wrote on last edited by
              #17

              RyanDev wrote:

              There was a point not long ago where everything was racist.

              Ah, I must have missed that.  Thanks for clearing it up. /ravi

              My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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              • N Nish Nishant

                He's joking. Intentional abuse of the word 'racist'. :-)

                Regards, Nish


                Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                R Offline
                R Offline
                Ravi Bhavnani
                wrote on last edited by
                #18

                OK, I get it now.  I must have missed the spate of "That's racist." comments, hence my confusion. /ravi

                My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                • R Ravi Bhavnani

                  OK, I get it now.  I must have missed the spate of "That's racist." comments, hence my confusion. /ravi

                  My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                  Nish Nishant
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #19

                  Well, I didn't see many recently either. But it's a general trend online, specially on sites like reddit. Pretty much any disagreement is met with a "that's racist" response. :-)

                  Regards, Nish


                  Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

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                  • R Ravi Bhavnani

                    RyanDev wrote:

                    There was a point not long ago where everything was racist.

                    Ah, I must have missed that.  Thanks for clearing it up. /ravi

                    My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                    Nish Nishant
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #20

                    Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

                    Thanks for clearing it up.

                    Don't thank him. You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there. :-D

                    Regards, Nish


                    Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                    R 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • N Nish Nishant

                      Well, I didn't see many recently either. But it's a general trend online, specially on sites like reddit. Pretty much any disagreement is met with a "that's racist" response. :-)

                      Regards, Nish


                      Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Ravi Bhavnani
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #21

                      Ah.  Never been to Reddit. /ravi

                      My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                      • R Ravi Bhavnani

                        Nish Sivakumar wrote:

                        You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there.

                        That's racist. /ravi

                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                        N Offline
                        N Offline
                        Nish Nishant
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #22

                        :laugh:

                        Regards, Nish


                        Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • N Nish Nishant

                          Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

                          Thanks for clearing it up.

                          Don't thank him. You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there. :-D

                          Regards, Nish


                          Blog: voidnish.wordpress.com Latest article: C++ 11 features in Visual C++ 2013 Preview

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Ravi Bhavnani
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #23

                          Nish Sivakumar wrote:

                          You are supposed to accuse him of a hidden racist agenda there.

                          That's racist. /ravi

                          My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                          N 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • R Ravi Bhavnani

                            What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

                            My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                            D Offline
                            Dan Neely
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #24

                            The human race. :doh:

                            Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason? Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful? --Zachris Topelius Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies. -- Sarah Hoyt

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • R Ravi Bhavnani

                              What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

                              My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                              Mike HankeyM Offline
                              Mike HankeyM Offline
                              Mike Hankey
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #25

                              The human race? :)

                              Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever! Rich Tennant 5th Wave

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                              • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                The human race? :)

                                Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever! Rich Tennant 5th Wave

                                R Offline
                                R Offline
                                Ravi Bhavnani
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #26

                                Have you been talking to Dan? :-D /ravi

                                My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                                • B Blue Waffler

                                  This is Racist.

                                  M Offline
                                  M Offline
                                  Marc Clifton
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #27

                                  Blue Waffler wrote:

                                  This is Racist.

                                  No, it's sexist. Marc

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • B Blue Waffler

                                    This is Racist.

                                    J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    JimmyRopes
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #28

                                    Blue Waffler wrote:

                                    This is Racist.

                                    Not if the man and woman are of the same racial origins. :doh:

                                    The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
                                    Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                                    I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • Z ZurdoDev

                                      There was a point not long ago where everything was racist. Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected, I can't recall but if you said anything bad about anyone people would say your racist. It's just a joke. I'm surprised people didn't see that.

                                      There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

                                      J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      JimmyRopes
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #29

                                      RyanDev wrote:

                                      There was a point not long ago where everything was racist. Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected,

                                      That is racist. :suss:

                                      The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
                                      Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                                      I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                                      Z 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • R Ravi Bhavnani

                                        What race does this joke denigrate? :confused: /ravi

                                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                                        J Offline
                                        J Offline
                                        JimmyRopes
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #30

                                        Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

                                        What race does this joke denigrate?

                                        All of them. :rolleyes:

                                        The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
                                        Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                                        I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • J JimmyRopes

                                          RyanDev wrote:

                                          There was a point not long ago where everything was racist. Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected,

                                          That is racist. :suss:

                                          The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
                                          Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
                                          I'm on-line therefore I am. JimmyRopes

                                          Z Offline
                                          Z Offline
                                          ZurdoDev
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #31

                                          Quote:

                                          Probably had something to do with Obama getting elected, That is racist. :suss:

                                          Voting for Obama was racist? Hm. I might agree. :)

                                          There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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