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The lies we post on LinkedIn

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  • M Marc Clifton

    So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

    Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

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    F Offline
    Foothill
    wrote on last edited by
    #5

    I thought about listing one of my skills on LinkedIn as CodeProject Lounge Lizard but I don't think most people would get the joke.

    if (Object.DividedByZero == true) { Universe.Implode(); } Meus ratio ex fortis machina. Simplicitatis de formae ac munus. -Foothill, 2016

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    • M Marc Clifton

      So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

      Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

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      Mark_Wallace
      wrote on last edited by
      #6

      My CV is completely accurate -- apart from the bit about how I was rocketed to Earth as an infant from the planet Krypton, of course.

      I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

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      • M Marc Clifton

        So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

        Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

        M Offline
        M Offline
        Mycroft Holmes
        wrote on last edited by
        #7

        It gets even worse when a mid level developer on your team promotes himself as the lead developer on a project where YOU were the lead. This particular guy (we were working for Dell in Australia) is now happily working in New York focused on SharePoint development. This guarantees In will never need to deal with him again. There was no recourse to dispute the details in those days, don't know now as I do not keep up with linkedin.

        Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

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        • M Marc Clifton

          So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

          Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

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          B Offline
          Beginner Luck
          wrote on last edited by
          #8

          When employed by a lies and still can do it. the rest is history. if you have done before but forget that is a different story:~

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          • M Mycroft Holmes

            It gets even worse when a mid level developer on your team promotes himself as the lead developer on a project where YOU were the lead. This particular guy (we were working for Dell in Australia) is now happily working in New York focused on SharePoint development. This guarantees In will never need to deal with him again. There was no recourse to dispute the details in those days, don't know now as I do not keep up with linkedin.

            Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

            B Offline
            B Offline
            Beginner Luck
            wrote on last edited by
            #9

            that is overdo it.

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            • M Marc Clifton

              So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

              Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

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              G Offline
              Garth J Lancaster
              wrote on last edited by
              #10

              yup, sh*ts me to tears - here am I with an honest profile getting sfa/nada approaches and I know people who have obtained work by fraudulently claiming they are experts in x,y,z, and if they get a 'hit' they spend the weekend studying the appropriate guide to x,y,z so they can handle the interview gah !!!

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              • G Garth J Lancaster

                yup, sh*ts me to tears - here am I with an honest profile getting sfa/nada approaches and I know people who have obtained work by fraudulently claiming they are experts in x,y,z, and if they get a 'hit' they spend the weekend studying the appropriate guide to x,y,z so they can handle the interview gah !!!

                B Offline
                B Offline
                Beginner Luck
                wrote on last edited by
                #11

                haha :-D :laugh:

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                • M Marc Clifton

                  So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

                  Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

                  V Offline
                  V Offline
                  V 0
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #12

                  If I'm ever in an interview and I start seeing holes in his/her explanation the change for him/her getting the job go down exponentially. In fact, when I'm in an interview for myself I usually start with: What you see is what you get. No lies, no sales talk, this is it. :-\

                  V.

                  (MQOTD rules and previous solutions)

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                  • M Mark_Wallace

                    My CV is completely accurate -- apart from the bit about how I was rocketed to Earth as an infant from the planet Krypton, of course.

                    I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                    J Offline
                    J Offline
                    Johnny J
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #13

                    No, that would be your alter ego, Clark Wallace?!?!? :rolleyes:

                    Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
                    Anonymous
                    -----
                    The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
                    Winston Churchill, 1944
                    -----
                    I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
                    Me, all the time

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                    • M Mark_Wallace

                      My CV is completely accurate -- apart from the bit about how I was rocketed to Earth as an infant from the planet Krypton, of course.

                      I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                      5 Offline
                      5 Offline
                      5imone
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #14

                      My CV is completely inaccurate -- apart from the bit about how I was rocketed to Earth as an infant from the planet Krypton, of course. :) :) :)

                      'Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.' Benny Hill

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                      • M Marc Clifton

                        So, I looked at what an ex-consultant at the company where I work posted for his experience: Contracting onsite and remote as Senior Software Engineer for: [redacted] (fintech industry) Responsible for check cashing (Datawire XML, FirstData Telecheck packets) Magnetic stripe (AAMVA, tracks1-3) features and contributed EMV, RF-ID, ACH (Dwolla), POS (Poynt) features using Python, Django, PostgreSQL, Javascript, Backbone, Chromium, ATM (Diebold); Everything, except the first part, is a lie. OK, it was written in Python, but it was so bad that we ripped it out and rewrote it. 1. He did no Django, PostgresSql, Javascript, Backbone, or Chromium work. 2. The Diebold ATM arrived after he left. 3. We've never done RF-ID 4. We still haven't gotten our EMV ducks in a row to even begin that work 5. He never touched Dwolla and Poynt (and neither has anyone else yet either.) 6. He never did anything with the magstripe readers. I would imagine that the rest of his work experience is equally dishonest. :sigh: Marc

                        Imperative to Functional Programming Succinctly Contributors Wanted for Higher Order Programming Project! Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny

                        T Offline
                        T Offline
                        Tomaz Stih 0
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #15

                        I remember trying to find a job without a network and in a totally new environment (London, UK) and not being used to this dishonesty. I naively sent an honest 1 pager to recruiters and received only low end offers. Then, instead of conjuring experience out of thin air like dishonest people do, I decided to fight the system with even more brutal honesty and transparency. Thus I created a software developer's portfolio and published it online[^]. I described my major projects, my though flows, and decisions. I wanted to show that I understand why I do what I do. That I have ideas with business impact. As my portfolio outgrew 10 pages recruiters started sending me kind mails offering me assistance with creating a stunning CV. Which is just another way of telling me that I'm doing it all wrong. But you see...I decided to be anti-market. And I insisted using that one. So...I soon started receiving some serious offers. Not from HR guys; but from people who were like me. And hold similar qualities and values. So at present I'm building a treasury system for investment bank and a drilling optimization web site for a start-up. I have no problems finding new opportunities and I am still receiving offers weekly, although my CV is not published anywhere. When I update my CV again I will just leave the essays on my projects, dates, and references. My idea is that if you really weren't deep into your work and you are dishonest - you can write 100 essays but you will never hit just the right tones with clients. But if you genuinely understand problems you will know where they are and will intuitively send the right message.

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                        • F Foothill

                          I thought about listing one of my skills on LinkedIn as CodeProject Lounge Lizard but I don't think most people would get the joke.

                          if (Object.DividedByZero == true) { Universe.Implode(); } Meus ratio ex fortis machina. Simplicitatis de formae ac munus. -Foothill, 2016

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Ryan Peden
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #16

                          Maybe not, but the ones who do get the joke are probably people you'd enjoy working with. :)

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