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Homework, plz send codez

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  • M megaadam

    :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

    Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

    I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

    [...] and will thus not be affected.

    I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

    ... such stuff as dreams are made on

    S Offline
    S Offline
    Stylianos Polychroniadis
    wrote on last edited by
    #3

    Perhaps [...] and thus they will not be affected

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • M megaadam

      :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

      Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

      I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

      [...] and will thus not be affected.

      I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

      ... such stuff as dreams are made on

      L Offline
      L Offline
      Lost User
      wrote on last edited by
      #4

      and thus will not be affected "thus" is replaceable with "so" so: if you wrote "and will so not be affected" <-- that doesn't sound right does it? ("so wrong" as the kiddies say) ... not saying use "so", just that "thus" is in the wrong place.

      Signature ready for installation. Please Reboot now.

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      • M megaadam

        :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

        Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

        I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

        [...] and will thus not be affected.

        I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

        ... such stuff as dreams are made on

        A Offline
        A Offline
        A_Griffin
        wrote on last edited by
        #5

        I would write

        Quote:

        Players who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the unmodified master playlist and will not be affected.

        leaving out "they" and "thus". btw, you have "the the" in your sentence.

        OriginalGriffO M J 3 Replies Last reply
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        • A A_Griffin

          I would write

          Quote:

          Players who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the unmodified master playlist and will not be affected.

          leaving out "they" and "thus". btw, you have "the the" in your sentence.

          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriffO Offline
          OriginalGriff
          wrote on last edited by
          #6

          I'd agree - "thus" is pretty archaic and not needed in "Normal writing".

          Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay... AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!

          "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
          "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

          J M 2 Replies Last reply
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          • M megaadam

            :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

            Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

            I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

            [...] and will thus not be affected.

            I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

            ... such stuff as dreams are made on

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Lost User
            wrote on last edited by
            #7

            My English tutor always said that, when in doubt, to go for two shorter sentences. Might not be the best way to create literature, but is always a good tip when writing manuals or documentation.

            Bastard Programmer from Hell :suss: If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]

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            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

              I'd agree - "thus" is pretty archaic and not needed in "Normal writing".

              Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay... AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!

              J Offline
              J Offline
              Johnny J
              wrote on last edited by
              #8

              Well, you're from Wales, thus you have no idea about that! ;P Just kidding of course!

              Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
              Anonymous
              -----
              The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
              Winston Churchill, 1944
              -----
              Never argue with a fool. Onllokers may not be able to tell the difference.
              Mark Twain

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • M megaadam

                :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

                Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

                [...] and will thus not be affected.

                I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

                ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                P Offline
                P Offline
                pt1401
                wrote on last edited by
                #9

                I would simplify it further:- "Only users who start streaming inside peak hours will be affected".

                N 1 Reply Last reply
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                • P pt1401

                  I would simplify it further:- "Only users who start streaming inside peak hours will be affected".

                  N Offline
                  N Offline
                  Nathan Minier
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #10

                  Or better: Users streaming during peak hours may receive a modified master playlist. "Brevity is the soul of wit."

                  "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics." - Benjamin Disraeli

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • M megaadam

                    :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

                    Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                    I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

                    [...] and will thus not be affected.

                    I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

                    ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                    M Offline
                    M Offline
                    Munchies_Matt
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #11

                    Leave it, it is fine.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • A A_Griffin

                      I would write

                      Quote:

                      Players who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the unmodified master playlist and will not be affected.

                      leaving out "they" and "thus". btw, you have "the the" in your sentence.

                      M Offline
                      M Offline
                      megaadam
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #12

                      Thanks good answer, and yeah, I do have the "the the" in almost every sentence I write :sigh: is there a diagnosis for that?

                      ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                      N 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • M megaadam

                        :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

                        Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                        I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

                        [...] and will thus not be affected.

                        I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

                        ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                        M Offline
                        M Offline
                        Marc Clifton
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #13

                        "the peak hours" is awkward -- normally, the phrase is without "the", as in "during peak hours" "and they will thus not be affected" => remove it entirely. "will get the unmodified master playlist" is sufficient. Or: "will not be affected and will get the unmodified master playlist." "will get the" => "will receive". "Get" is sort of low class and probably lacking descriptiveness. "will get the the unmodified" => I'm assuming the second "the" was a typo? Consider reversing the logic of the sentence: "Users who start streaming during peak hours will receive a modified playlist. Users who start streaming just before peak hours are unaffected."

                        Latest Article - Code Review - What You Can Learn From a Single Line of Code Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802

                        M C 2 Replies Last reply
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                        • M Marc Clifton

                          "the peak hours" is awkward -- normally, the phrase is without "the", as in "during peak hours" "and they will thus not be affected" => remove it entirely. "will get the unmodified master playlist" is sufficient. Or: "will not be affected and will get the unmodified master playlist." "will get the" => "will receive". "Get" is sort of low class and probably lacking descriptiveness. "will get the the unmodified" => I'm assuming the second "the" was a typo? Consider reversing the logic of the sentence: "Users who start streaming during peak hours will receive a modified playlist. Users who start streaming just before peak hours are unaffected."

                          Latest Article - Code Review - What You Can Learn From a Single Line of Code Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802

                          M Offline
                          M Offline
                          megaadam
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #14

                          Wowzerz! Thanx! I think I owe you a :beer: !

                          ... such stuff as dreams are made on

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                          • M megaadam

                            Thanks good answer, and yeah, I do have the "the the" in almost every sentence I write :sigh: is there a diagnosis for that?

                            ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                            N Offline
                            N Offline
                            Nelek
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #15

                            megaadam wrote:

                            is there a diagnosis for that?

                            not enough :java::java:

                            M.D.V. ;) If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about? Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.

                            M 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • N Nelek

                              megaadam wrote:

                              is there a diagnosis for that?

                              not enough :java::java:

                              M.D.V. ;) If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about? Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.

                              M Offline
                              M Offline
                              megaadam
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #16

                              Or too much of it. :suss:

                              ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                              N 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • M megaadam

                                Or too much of it. :suss:

                                ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                                N Offline
                                N Offline
                                Nelek
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #17

                                SACRILEGE... there is never too much coffee or bacon :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

                                M.D.V. ;) If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about? Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • M megaadam

                                  :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

                                  Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                                  I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

                                  [...] and will thus not be affected.

                                  I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

                                  ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                                  G Offline
                                  G Offline
                                  GuyThiebaut
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #18

                                  megaadam wrote:

                                  Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                                  You have two 'the's in that sentence ;)

                                  “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”

                                  ― Christopher Hitchens

                                  M 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • M Marc Clifton

                                    "the peak hours" is awkward -- normally, the phrase is without "the", as in "during peak hours" "and they will thus not be affected" => remove it entirely. "will get the unmodified master playlist" is sufficient. Or: "will not be affected and will get the unmodified master playlist." "will get the" => "will receive". "Get" is sort of low class and probably lacking descriptiveness. "will get the the unmodified" => I'm assuming the second "the" was a typo? Consider reversing the logic of the sentence: "Users who start streaming during peak hours will receive a modified playlist. Users who start streaming just before peak hours are unaffected."

                                    Latest Article - Code Review - What You Can Learn From a Single Line of Code Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    CodeWraith
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #19

                                    And while we are at it, we could replasse all the 'will's with 'shall', thus making it clear that there shall be no discussions about this. :-)

                                    I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.

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                                    • G GuyThiebaut

                                      megaadam wrote:

                                      Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                                      You have two 'the's in that sentence ;)

                                      “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”

                                      ― Christopher Hitchens

                                      M Offline
                                      M Offline
                                      megaadam
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #20

                                      I do not! I never never repeat myself.

                                      ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • M megaadam

                                        :cool:Not exactly homework, more like a fine tuning of the fine English language. Here is a passage of the documentation I am writing.

                                        Users who start streaming during the peak hours will be affected. Users who start streaming just before the peak hours will get the the unmodified master playlist and they will thus not be affected.

                                        I find the "they" at the end a bit clunky. But if just write

                                        [...] and will thus not be affected.

                                        I am not sure if the sentence remains correct, and clear. I mean "they" refers to the unaffected users, and in the the second case "will" is referring back to the users. Perhaps both are fine but I wonder. Thanks for any input, and for reading this far.

                                        ... such stuff as dreams are made on

                                        D Offline
                                        D Offline
                                        Duke Carey
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #21

                                        Bless you, bless you, bless you for using "affected" instead of the abomination that is "impacted." Wisdom teeth are sometimes "impacted." Otherwise that word should rarely be used

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

                                          I'd agree - "thus" is pretty archaic and not needed in "Normal writing".

                                          Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay... AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!

                                          M Offline
                                          M Offline
                                          MKJCP
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #22

                                          For some reason "thus" often works well for me. I like non-standard words, it keeps things interesting. I used "notwithstanding" a couple times in a training manual. Once and a while I like to use the interrobang (Alt+8253) in an e-mail. A great and underused punctuation mark. Not sure how to do it here though.

                                          OriginalGriffO 1 Reply Last reply
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