How do you cope?
-
David Stone wrote:
At least those people could form proper sentences.
Nice diversion technique. You may as well just open up and say you don't have a point. Jeremy Falcon
You don't either. In fact you just created division over someone trying to show kindness and support.:rose:
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool:
Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now.People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used CPhog[^]CPhog. The act of using CPhog (Firefox)[^] alone doesn't make Firefox cool. It opens your eyes to the possibilities and then you start looking for other things like CPhog (Firefox)[^] and your eyes are suddenly open to all sorts of useful things all through Firefox. - (Self Quote)
-
Faith is also not worth arguing over. It is what it is. People believe what they do for a whole host of reasons, most of which aren't important to anyone else. BW
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wrightbrianwelsch wrote:
People believe what they do for a whole host of reasons, most of which aren't important to anyone else.
I agree with that. Jeremy Falcon
-
Last night my grandfather passed away. He was 89. He was stricken with Parkinsons and a whole host of other ailments that seem to come along when you get 80+ years old. His last 7 years he lived with Dementia, often forgetting the names of his children and close friends. It was the first time I ever saw someone dying right in front of me. His breathing was shallow and rapid. I hate the sight of seeing him in pain. I hate that my final memories are of him in this fragile state. I've always had difficulty accepting death. The idea of "just accept it and move on" seems to never provide me any comfort. When I think about my death or the death of my loved ones, my entire body reacts making my knees weak, heart race, and all of my thoughts are consumed with trying to find resolve. How do you live on in peace knowing the inevitable? Jim RunFatBoy.net[^] - Exercise for the rest of us.
It can takes years but you will remember the good times, the times you shared and both enjoyed :love: The tigress is here :-D
-
Rama Krishna Vavilala wrote:
You need to see the movie "Contact" again?
Um... no. I suffered through it twice already. :-D Jeremy Falcon
-
AAntix wrote:
How do you live on in peace knowing the inevitable?
It's called selective amnesia. Death is inevitable, so why get all hung up about it? We're all going to die one day, we just don't know when. My personal method of "dealing" with the fact that life is a terminal disease has three parts: 1. Whenever possible, make a difference in other peoples lives who have made a difference in mine. 2. Laugh. Often. And loud. 3. Don't be afraid to love. Mike Poz
5. The tigress is here :-D
-
brianwelsch wrote:
That's why it's called faith.
Faith is an excuse for ignorance. Jeremy Falcon
You do realize that you are attacking people for what they believe and not respecting them for it at all? If someone had replied and said, "Shalom" (SP?) would you have attacked them? I doubt it.
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool: Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now. People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used CPhog[^]CPhog. The act of using CPhog (Firefox)[^] alone doesn't make Firefox cool. It opens your eyes to the possibilities and then you start looking for other things like CPhog (Firefox)[^] and your eyes are suddenly open to all sorts of useful things all through Firefox. - (Self Quote)
-
Go outside, pick up the nicest smoothest stone you can find. Throw it as hard as you can and as far as you can. Once it's in the air freak out, try to keep it in the air longer, run and try to catch it, do anything possible to keep it in the air. Nothing you can do is going to prevent that stone from hitting the ground. It's going to. When it does that's it. Nothing you did will have changed that. So I offer you this.
- Appreciate the stone but don't covet it.
- When you throw the stone, aim carefully. You only get one toss so make sure it's path is free of obstructions.
- Admire how well the stone flies, how while it's in the air nothing impedes it's flight.
- When it comes to the ground clear your mind. It's over.
- Go back inside and live your life the way the stone lived it's flight.
Life is not about the destination it's about the journey. Some will tell you that you need God/Religion and while I think that's excellent advice I also think you need to realize that those things you hold on to the tightest will slip through your fingers and because you clutched them so tightly you'll never learn to appreciate them for what they are or were. Consider this. Right now you are not remembering the way your grandfather lived, you are remembering how he died. How do you think he would feel about that? He lived an entire life in front of you and all you can think about is how he died? I think instead he'd want you to cherish the best things about him and to keep him alive in your memories. Death is a brutal fact of life and you may need to seek grief counselling and there's no shame in that it can be very helpful. But I really think you just need lighten your step a bit carry your best memories of him wherever you go and celebrate the fact that for him life is no longer about suffering in physical pain and mental dimentia. Remember the great man he was not the shell of a man he became.:rose:
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool:
Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now.People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used
Well said, 5.:rose:
Tech, life, family, faith: Give me a visit. I'm currently blogging about: Goof around music jam with my brothers (with video) The apostle Paul, modernly speaking: Epistles of Paul Judah Himango
-
Steve Holle wrote:
why don't you provide your version of confort?
I already did. Why don't you read the thread? Jeremy Falcon
You said "I don't think there is a way to cope with it." then proceeded to say how balling up your emotions is the best way to help ignore tragedy rather than confront it. How is that comforting?
-
Wrong time, wrong place.
Actually, I don't believe there are all that many times or places where a bit of well-placed levity and humor can help. I've consoled many friends through really tough times. And they're usually laughing by the time that we're done talking. Humor is just my way of dealing with stuff. I know that seems wrong to some people, but it works for me. And just because the OP is sad doesn't mean I can't try to provide some comic relief in a somber thread.
Once you wanted revolution
Now you're the institution
How's it feel to be the man? -
You don't either. In fact you just created division over someone trying to show kindness and support.:rose:
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool:
Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now.People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used CPhog[^]CPhog. The act of using CPhog (Firefox)[^] alone doesn't make Firefox cool. It opens your eyes to the possibilities and then you start looking for other things like CPhog (Firefox)[^] and your eyes are suddenly open to all sorts of useful things all through Firefox. - (Self Quote)
code-frog wrote:
You don't either.
I did have a point. Perhaps my grammar didn't, but that wasn't the point.
code-frog wrote:
In fact you just created division over someone trying to show kindness and support.
To each his own. I prefer truth over believing what I've been told because I told so by my parents who had even a lesser understanding of life than future generations will. And I don't think finding the truth is ever a bad thing. And believe me, this drives my mother crazy. :laugh: Jeremy Falcon
-
Rama Krishna Vavilala wrote:
You need to see the movie "Contact" again?
Um... no. I suffered through it twice already. :-D Jeremy Falcon
-
AAntix wrote:
Last night my grandfather passed away.
My condolences. I lost my father last October. Many of us do know how you feel.
AAntix wrote:
His last 7 years he lived with Dementia, often forgetting
I hope this does not come across rude. I will say you are fairly lucky. My father did not know who I was for the last 5+ years also. I would have gladly taken occational. Again I feel for you and know it hurts. Dementia is common and due to people not dying from other causes is getting more so. I heard that 50% of those that die from old age do have some form.
AAntix wrote:
How do you live on in peace knowing the inevitable?
I know my children and friends will remember the man I was. That is enough for me. This last fathers day was rough for me. First with out dad around. However my children wrote me a letter telling me what I meant and had taught them. (Tears are comming as I write this.) It did really mean a lot and they surprised me with the details. So I ask you to tell your Dad, what Grandfather meant to you and the good memories you had. It will mean a lot to your dad (or your mother as the case may be, I am speaking from my loss.) :rose: "Yes I know the voices are not real. But they have some pretty good ideas."
Michael A. Barnhart wrote:
I know my children and friends will remember the man I was. That is enough for me. This last fathers day was rough for me. First with out dad around. However my children wrote me a letter telling me what I meant and had taught them. (Tears are comming as I write this.) It did really mean a lot and they surprised me with the details.
I think I know what I need to do for my Dad's birthday tomorrow. Thanks. :rose:
Once you wanted revolution
Now you're the institution
How's it feel to be the man? -
Go outside, pick up the nicest smoothest stone you can find. Throw it as hard as you can and as far as you can. Once it's in the air freak out, try to keep it in the air longer, run and try to catch it, do anything possible to keep it in the air. Nothing you can do is going to prevent that stone from hitting the ground. It's going to. When it does that's it. Nothing you did will have changed that. So I offer you this.
- Appreciate the stone but don't covet it.
- When you throw the stone, aim carefully. You only get one toss so make sure it's path is free of obstructions.
- Admire how well the stone flies, how while it's in the air nothing impedes it's flight.
- When it comes to the ground clear your mind. It's over.
- Go back inside and live your life the way the stone lived it's flight.
Life is not about the destination it's about the journey. Some will tell you that you need God/Religion and while I think that's excellent advice I also think you need to realize that those things you hold on to the tightest will slip through your fingers and because you clutched them so tightly you'll never learn to appreciate them for what they are or were. Consider this. Right now you are not remembering the way your grandfather lived, you are remembering how he died. How do you think he would feel about that? He lived an entire life in front of you and all you can think about is how he died? I think instead he'd want you to cherish the best things about him and to keep him alive in your memories. Death is a brutal fact of life and you may need to seek grief counselling and there's no shame in that it can be very helpful. But I really think you just need lighten your step a bit carry your best memories of him wherever you go and celebrate the fact that for him life is no longer about suffering in physical pain and mental dimentia. Remember the great man he was not the shell of a man he became.:rose:
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool:
Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now.People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used
Excellent advice. :)
Once you wanted revolution
Now you're the institution
How's it feel to be the man? -
You do realize that you are attacking people for what they believe and not respecting them for it at all? If someone had replied and said, "Shalom" (SP?) would you have attacked them? I doubt it.
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool: Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now. People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used CPhog[^]CPhog. The act of using CPhog (Firefox)[^] alone doesn't make Firefox cool. It opens your eyes to the possibilities and then you start looking for other things like CPhog (Firefox)[^] and your eyes are suddenly open to all sorts of useful things all through Firefox. - (Self Quote)
code-frog wrote:
"Shiloam" (SP?)
Shalom. I would have to say, we shouldn't devolve this thread into a religion vs. secular flamefest, simply because someone said something another didn't like.
Tech, life, family, faith: Give me a visit. I'm currently blogging about: Goof around music jam with my brothers (with video) The apostle Paul, modernly speaking: Epistles of Paul Judah Himango
-
You do realize that you are attacking people for what they believe and not respecting them for it at all? If someone had replied and said, "Shalom" (SP?) would you have attacked them? I doubt it.
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool: Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now. People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used CPhog[^]CPhog. The act of using CPhog (Firefox)[^] alone doesn't make Firefox cool. It opens your eyes to the possibilities and then you start looking for other things like CPhog (Firefox)[^] and your eyes are suddenly open to all sorts of useful things all through Firefox. - (Self Quote)
code-frog wrote:
You do realize that you are attacking people for what they believe and not respecting them for it at all?
I'm not attacking people; I'm attacking religion. The problem with some people is they take everything personally.
code-frog wrote:
"Shiloam" (SP?) would you have attacked them? I doubt it.
Because it wouldn't mean the same thing as what the poster said. If someone said "God bless" I wouldn't have done anything either. Anyway, this is really turning into a SB discussion, so if we continue, at least let it be in there. Jeremy Falcon
-
I know I'm going to get flamed for this but it's important. You need to find out what it means to accept Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. There is no hope otherwise. Find a Christian friend and ask him what this means and where to start. Let me know if I can help.
Steve Holle wrote:
There is no hope otherwise.
I'm normally one to keep quiet when it comes to all things religous. I respect people's choices to believe whatever they want. But I think you took it too far by saying that there is no hope for this poor grieving guy unless he adopts your beliefs. Come on, I'm sure the guy is confused enough with life at this point. Don't try to shove your religion down his throat at a tender moment like that! Josh
-
code-frog wrote:
You don't either.
I did have a point. Perhaps my grammar didn't, but that wasn't the point.
code-frog wrote:
In fact you just created division over someone trying to show kindness and support.
To each his own. I prefer truth over believing what I've been told because I told so by my parents who had even a lesser understanding of life than future generations will. And I don't think finding the truth is ever a bad thing. And believe me, this drives my mother crazy. :laugh: Jeremy Falcon
Jeremy Falcon wrote:
I prefer truth over believing what I've been told because I told so by my parents who had even a lesser understanding of life than future generations will.
True or False: Nero was emperor of Rome.
-
Rama Krishna Vavilala wrote:
You need to see the movie "Contact" again?
Um... no. I suffered through it twice already. :-D Jeremy Falcon
-
code-frog wrote:
"Shiloam" (SP?)
Shalom. I would have to say, we shouldn't devolve this thread into a religion vs. secular flamefest, simply because someone said something another didn't like.
Tech, life, family, faith: Give me a visit. I'm currently blogging about: Goof around music jam with my brothers (with video) The apostle Paul, modernly speaking: Epistles of Paul Judah Himango
Yeah you're right. It's really bad timing on my part. So, I'll lay low on the religion topic for a few days. Jeremy Falcon
-
code-frog wrote:
You don't either.
I did have a point. Perhaps my grammar didn't, but that wasn't the point.
code-frog wrote:
In fact you just created division over someone trying to show kindness and support.
To each his own. I prefer truth over believing what I've been told because I told so by my parents who had even a lesser understanding of life than future generations will. And I don't think finding the truth is ever a bad thing. And believe me, this drives my mother crazy. :laugh: Jeremy Falcon
I understand what you are saying but just because you are saying it does not make you right. It doesn't make you wrong either. It takes as much faith for you to feel the way you do as it does for others to feel the way they do. Notice I don't attack you for how you feel, accuse you of being feeble minded or of inventing something to make you feel better. I don't call your stance out as ignorant or anything else. I'm totally cool with what you believe (or not) and it doesn't affect me. But then Hindus, Muslims, Catholics, Mormons and Homosexuals don't bug me either. I respect everyone and in time if their opinions become mine it's cool if my opinions become theirs it's cool.
"You have an arrow in your butt!" - Fiona:cool:
Welcome to CP in your language. Post the unicode version in My CP Blog [ ^ ] now.People who don't understand how awesome Firefox is have never used CPhog[^]CPhog. The act of using CPhog (Firefox)[^] alone doesn't make Firefox cool. It opens your eyes to the possibilities and then you start looking for other things like CPhog (Firefox)[^] and your eyes are suddenly open to all sorts of useful things all through Firefox. - (Self Quote)